What age should young adults leave the home?

Plumbthedepths · 22-08-2019 04:49PM

facehugger99 wrote: »

Sure, there's always a handy excuse for those that don't want to stand on their own feet.

It's usually lads from Dublin that are the ones still living at home quite late in life with sob-stories of high rents, etc. Fellas from down the country somehow mange to live independently in the same city though.

So you don't accept there is a housing shortage or that rents are unaffordable to a significant number of people.

am i bovvered · 22-08-2019 04:55PM

Both my children left home at 18
Our son is now 24 and our daughter 21
Our son went to the UK and done an apprenticeship, made him grow up and quickly, he bought a small home last year.
Our daughter works in hospitality.

We were married at their age and always instilled in them the need to be independent.
We left Ireland last year and are traveling/working, so we are living life the opposite to what’s considered the norm.
Both our children are very mature, but the truth is we are all pretending to be adults !!!

_Brian · 22-08-2019 04:55PM

My parents didn’t care too much. I was gone to college at 17 and between that and getting a gaff with herself at 22 I only spent occasional nights at home.

My brother lived at home till 30

My kids can be in and out of the house as long as it serves them. Hopefully Mrs and myself be off doing stuff and traveling. We currently own two houses with one rented and all going well they will be getting a house each when the time comes.

Ray Palmer · 22-08-2019 04:57PM

facehugger99 wrote: »

Camila Savory Thermometer wrote: »

Maybe they wouldn't be failing in life quite so badly if they hadn't had to endure a financial crisis and then a housing crisis thanks to successive inept governments.

Sure, there's always a handy excuse for those that don't want to stand on their own feet.

It's usually lads from Dublin that are the ones still living at home quite late in life with sob-stories of high rents, etc. Fellas from down the country somehow mange to live independently in the same city though.

I love how sexist people are about men and think nothing of it. The reason so many women don't have to live at home is because they get prioritised on housing lists if they have a child. This active discrimination has being going on for decades where single men were dropping on the list. The were meant to address that but never have.
Lots of women living at home still have kids too yet people go on about men living at home. Lot more strain on the parents when they now have added grandchildren to their household that they are expected to take care of.

knockers84 · 22-08-2019 05:23PM

I wouldn't judge anyone still living with their folks whether 25 or 50 once they get on and respect their parents then each to their own. Definitely should be kicking in a hundred euro a week to the parents though.

Also if people are saving for their mortgage and just pitching in on food and bills nothing wrong with that either.

Also some people have mental illnesses and just don't fit in a workplace which I understand.

Personally I left home right after the leaving cert, got a job and got through three years of college as well. Did have financial backing from parents but the mother was an absolute control freak and constantly giving out to me, making fun of me, putting me down, saying i was useless, saying ull never get married, saying friends are only using me, when trying to study for the leaving cert purposely making nice and giving out to me, anything i said was wrong, saying ull never amount in life, and she was always looking for an argument. Was seriously affecting my mental health.

I still talk her but couldn't put up with it any longer. Thankfully now I'm 28, renting and saving for a mortgage, would like to move home to save more for the mortgage but not putting up with the constant put downs. It will just take an extra year or two of saving.

BrokenArrows · 22-08-2019 05:42PM

When I have kids I'd expect them to be out of the home permanently once they graduate college after a 4 year degree. So around the 22-24 year old mark.

Then maybe a year after that while they get setup into the world of employment.

After that I'd expect to be able to get on with my own life without having to deal with the day to day stuff of having another adult in my house.

LionelNashe · 22-08-2019 05:51PM

Camila Savory Thermometer wrote: »

The 2016 Census showed that 59 percent of men over 18 and 41 percent of women were still living at home with their parents. So I don't think it's accurate to say that most leave home at 17.

I think you meant to phrase this differently. It can't be right, the way you've stated it. 59% of men over 18 = 59% of adult males. You don't mean that 59% of adult men live with their parents.

Fian · 22-08-2019 05:55PM

suicide_circus wrote: »

Twenty Four, Out The Door

My son did the leaving this year, going to UCD in September, we live nearby so he will continue to live at home. He is 18 now but will be 19 in a few months. He will be 25 in his final year in his degree, never mind if he goes on to do some kind of post grad. So he won't be fecked out at 24.

Nicetrustedcup · 22-08-2019 06:00PM

Myself moved out at 18 for college.

Came home for the summer and worked for the father

Rince and repeat to i was 23 and then moved to another city and now I am a home owner at 27 living with the girlfirend.

I think you grow up faster once you move out and pay your own bills and rent.

Montage of Feck · 22-08-2019 06:02PM

I'll be near retirement age before I can leave home, thanks FF/G.

Del2005 · 22-08-2019 06:03PM

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

So about 50 in Dublin :pac:

Everything is cyclical. Just because rent is expensive now doesn't mean it'll always be. The rental crisis of the early part of this decade had people getting huge discounts from the asking price for rentals. So in the space of little over a decade we've gone from a property boom, to a bust and back to a boom. The world is entering a recession.

eviltwin · 22-08-2019 06:05PM

I was kicked out of home so I won't be repeating that mistake with my children

My eldest is 23 and at home, it's fine. She takes care of herself, there is no mammy or daddy doing her housework, and she looks after the place and the animals when we aren't home so it's handy in a way to have her here.

She's able to have her partner over, friends over etc. We aren't the kind of parents who interfere or tut over her lifestyle choices so its working out well for her too

ongarboy · 22-08-2019 06:09PM

Camila Savory Thermometer wrote: »

The 2016 Census showed that 59 percent of men over 18 and 41 percent of women were still living at home with their parents. So I don't think it's accurate to say that most leave home at 17.

That statistic is absolutely not correct - are you missing an upper age bracket in that cohort? - otherwise you are saying 60% of all adult males and 40 % of all adult females of every age live at home with their parents which is simply not true. 90% of people marry so 60 or 40% of them are not living at home with one or other set of parents. What about everyone over 50 who's parents are most likely dead - therefore the majority of them are not "living at home" with their parents either..

22-08-2019 06:18PM

We were shipped out regardless of being on our feet at 18. Unless we contributed more than the council rent was (ahaha)
So my four will be safe in their home until they are on the best path for them.
Unless they cause trouble/bring trouble/drugs to my door then they've picked the wrong path and Will be released into the wild world to find their own way.

Elessar · 22-08-2019 06:59PM

I admit that I'm 34 shortly and still living at home. I moved out last year for 6 months to live with the ex girlfriend. Unfortunately we broke up and I moved back home in January this year.

It's a double edged sword tbh. Living at home means meals cooked and the ability to save a lot more. I did check out a few apartments to share in Dublin recently but I'd be looking at €850-1000 per month for rent alone, and that's sharing! At the moment, I'd rather that money going into my savings account. Plus work is literally a 10 minute drive away.

On the other hand, I do feel stuck. I can't really do my own thing as much as I want, can't bring girls home, have to live by the rules etc. I can't really live my life as an adult as such.

I'm still reeling from the breakup if I'm honest, and I'm a bit aimless in life as a result. I'd love more than anything to get back with the ex and start life together again in our own place, but it's not to be. The familiarity of home is probably the best place for me at the moment while I pick up the threads of my old life and let go of the one I had with her.

The danger is I will just get too comfortable and still be here when I'm 40. But without a partner who loves me as much as I do her, it's hard to see a justifiable reason to leave sometimes.

So to answer the question, not 34.

mr_fegelien · 22-08-2019 07:45PM

Elessar wrote: »

I admit that I'm 34 shortly and still living at home. I moved out last year for 6 months to live with the ex girlfriend. Unfortunately we broke up and I moved back home in January this year.

It's a double edged sword tbh. Living at home means meals cooked and the ability to save a lot more. I did check out a few apartments to share in Dublin recently but I'd be looking at €850-1000 per month for rent alone, and that's sharing! At the moment, I'd rather that money going into my savings account. Plus work is literally a 10 minute drive away.

On the other hand, I do feel stuck. I can't really do my own thing as much as I want, can't bring girls home, have to live by the rules etc. I can't really live my life as an adult as such.

I'm still reeling from the breakup if I'm honest, and I'm a bit aimless in life as a result. I'd love more than anything to get back with the ex and start life together again in our own place, but it's not to be. The familiarity of home is probably the best place for me at the moment while I pick up the threads of my old life and let go of the one I had with her.

The danger is I will just get too comfortable and still be here when I'm 40. But without a partner who loves me as much as I do her, it's hard to see a justifiable reason to leave sometimes.

So to answer the question, not 34.

If your parents died, could you move in with anyone?

knockers84 · 22-08-2019 07:47PM

mr_fegelien wrote: »

If your parents died, could you move in with anyone?

FFS

mr_fegelien · 22-08-2019 07:50PM

knockers84 wrote: »

FFS

I've immigrated here with my parents 10 years ago in first year and I can honestly say that if they die now, I'll be finished (metaphorically and literally). Don't have any family members here in Ireland.

khalessi · 22-08-2019 07:51PM

Elessar wrote: »

I admit that I'm 34 shortly and still living at home. I moved out last year for 6 months to live with the ex girlfriend. Unfortunately we broke up and I moved back home in January this year.

It's a double edged sword tbh. Living at home means meals cooked and the ability to save a lot more. I did check out a few apartments to share in Dublin recently but I'd be looking at €850-1000 per month for rent alone, and that's sharing! At the moment, I'd rather that money going into my savings account. Plus work is literally a 10 minute drive away.

On the other hand, I do feel stuck. I can't really do my own thing as much as I want, can't bring girls home, have to live by the rules etc. I can't really live my life as an adult as such.

I'm still reeling from the breakup if I'm honest, and I'm a bit aimless in life as a result. I'd love more than anything to get back with the ex and start life together again in our own place, but it's not to be. The familiarity of home is probably the best place for me at the moment while I pick up the threads of my old life and let go of the one I had with her.

The danger is I will just get too comfortable and still be here when I'm 40. But without a partner who loves me as much as I do her, it's hard to see a justifiable reason to leave sometimes.

So to answer the question, not 34.

You need to rebuild gather yourself and when you are ready you will move out. Happened to me too and eventually I felt gathered enough ad back to myself to move out. I used the opportunity to save some cash and now late 30s have own house. You will get there, dont sweat the small stuff

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 22-08-2019 07:52PM

When they get married and have kids of their own. Bye hun.

riclad · 22-08-2019 08:18PM

Depends on where you live, can you find a place to live,
thats not too expensive, comfortable to live in.
Do you want to save for a deposit for a house, apartment .
Are you working ,.going to college .
Thats part of the housing crisis, theres not enough good quality rental
units for the people who need it.
Student housing is good but its expensive.
Bedsits provided provided a basic place to live for those who wanted
to live close to college or work but they were banned .
Finding a house share is not easy and its not cheap.
and it does not suit everyone .

The simple answer is as soon as you can afford to do so leave .
Theres something special about living in your own space ,
buying your own food, its part of the process of growing up.
And when you go home you appreciate it more .
If you live close to home , or college ,
i understand it may be easier to stay at home for a few years,
If you do so its a good chance to save money for the future.

griffin100 · 22-08-2019 08:22PM

I plan on retiring and moving to the sun when I’m about 60ish. My youngest will be 22 then. If I can afford to keep the house the kids can live in it (whilst paying rent). If I need to sell it they’ll be heading out on their own, but with a few bob each from the sale. That’s the dream anyway.

ChikiChiki · 22-08-2019 08:23PM

31 and back and home. I'm not renting in that sham of a market. The mother is happy with the company and few bob. Will continue to put a few quid away for a mortgage.

I've rented here and abroad for most of my twenties. It's tough to give up that bit of independence but it's only when I came home and seen the state of the market the best option was back to mammy.

Richard Hillman · 22-08-2019 08:27PM

I live at home. I am in my early-mid 30s. I have a low paying job and no career prospects.

My options are to live at home, in a tent or live in one of those 27 man squats with some Costa Rican rickshaw drug dealers.

I will never be able to get a mortgage. My friends are all coupled up, so I can't share with friends. Will never find a partner due to my living/earning situation. I pay my way around the house, do all of my own cooking, cleaning etc. And do not cause any problems in the house.

My life situation is ****e, but I'm living here until I get chucked out and have to pick between a fine selection of beaches I can pitch a tent on or a one of those industrial bins. I like the privacy of the bin but the beach is more scenic. Choices

knockers84 · 22-08-2019 08:38PM

Kauai’s just because your on low income doesn’t mean you will never get a woman, my friend is on minimum wage and gets his pick of women, I earn around four times what he gets with my own place and barely any woman will touch me, unless greater than 15 stone

Kamu · 22-08-2019 08:53PM

Mid-20's and live at home with the folks and sister, and realistically will only leave if I emigrated or when I can afford my own house.

The family are happy to have me here, and for the most part I'm happy to be here.

I pay my share, do all my own chores, get my own food, etc, etc.

Best of all, I live in Dublin City Centre; I'd just be paying ridiculously more, for much, much less.

So long story short, I'm here for the considerable future, and have no issue with it.

SEPT 23 1989 · 22-08-2019 09:05PM

Left home at 20 easy then 200 quid a month

Can’t see my 18 year old leaving until they are in their late 20’s

Which is not right

Not good for them or us