Ex contacted me after 6 months - Confront or ignore?

Ursus Horribilis wrote: »

Maybe you too should go for counselling and try to get to the bottom of why you (a) continued in this relationship despite the way your ex treated you and (b) can't get over her. It has been a year and you're still not free from her.

I've done CBT and also counselling. I already have anxiety and depression so it didn't help, not that she cared anyway.

I've blocked everything now, just sometimes a song would come on the radio or i'd see something on tv and just gets the brain thinking.

I know i have to let go, everyone says the same so i have to listen to them. I have to listen to myself too because my brain is saying to erase her from my life.

Ursus Horribilis wrote: »

What was so great about her?

For a long time everything, likes much of the same things, made me laugh, made me happy and everyone could see i was happy.

Then all of a sudden it was just like someone flicked a switch and her mood changed so much.

The smallest things that happened were always my fault. We traveled Asia and i paid for everything, One time a flight was delayed and it was apparently my fault. We didn't speak at all on on that flight.

But then it just more intense and everything i done good was always bad in her eyes. I lost the head one night because i was so angry i told her to go see a Doctor as i was pretty sure she is bi-polar.

It was just like her heart turned to stone. I don't know why but it wasn't helping me. She could talk about her problems and i would listen but if i talked about mine she wouldn't listen.

As my Mother said to me you deserve better.

Ursus Horribilis wrote: »

Sounds like some sort of narcissist. From that I know of them, they love-bomb the object of their affections until they're hooked. Then they turn nasty but the poor sap they've reeled in can't get past the lovely person they were at the start.

That is true. Because when i wasn't well she was on the phone to my Mother, my Mother explained i wasn't well and she showed no emotion or empathy.

F*ck her anyway, she is stuck with the same tattoo we got in Asia. For me it doesn't remind me of her, it reminds me of my football team.

Only cares about herself. I am much different, i take pride in helping others who are nice and respectful.

You wouldn't believe half the things she said to me before, pure evil is the only way to describe it.

wiggle16 wrote: »

Scarlet for her

I think the only way you're going to get past her is to find a way to stop thinking of her entirely, not the good, not the bad - and I know that's useless as advice. I think you should continue with the CBT if you're no longer doing it. Be honest with the facilitator about why you're doing it, about your ex, warts and all. It will help.

You will come out the other side of this in time.

Ha ha, yes every time she washes her face in the mirror she will be reminded

What done it for me was the way she spoke about my family. My Nephew has ASD and cannot speak so i learned some sign language, showed her it before and she said i don't care.
Heartless b*itch.

I'll get back onto my job about more CBT sessions as i know they will help.