Urban legends

The pet snake that was "cuddling" up to its owner at night being being flat out on the bed alongside them. Turns out this behaviour a snake does when it's measuring potential prey to see if the carcass would fit ... or something.


Also, the fell who had a liathróid get caught in the hip socket while it was being put back into place following a dislocation on the sports field.

Couple in a restaurant and see Bono eating with a guy and when Bono goes to the toilet they ask the guy to get Bono's autograph for him, which he does, and then as they are leaving and paying their bill they're told: "Mr Springsteen has paid your bill".

Must have been told it a dozen times or more now. A taxi driver once told me this (with him apparently being the one who had asked for the autograph) while he was driving me to see the Boss at Croker. A guy in the Graham Norton 'red chair' also once told it to a huge round of applause.


EDIT: here's the chap on the GN show.

Dramatik wrote: »

Never to buy citrus fruit in places like spar or centra on Thomas street in Dublin as some of the junkies will stick their needles into the citrus fruits in an effort to clean the dirty needles :eek:

Apt username.

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

The semen one reminds me of one I was told back in the late 80's of someone smuggling a KFC takeout into Savoy One and as they are eating it feel liquid filling their mouth and spilling down their chin. So they go into the toilet and see that their face is covered in blood and it turns out they were eating a warm mouse in batter.

That's true.
Except it happened in Cork and it was a rat.

seamus wrote: »

Woman makes a Slim-fast shake but then gets a phone call and has to rush off somewhere.

Arrives home hours later to find that there are "worms" swimming around in it, and that's how slim-fast works.

That reminds me of the time in work we got a 3 foot long tape worm from a patient. Pretty cool seeing a real one.

Will Smith. The hit the floor one.

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

Couple in a restaurant and see Bono eating with a guy and when Bono goes to the toilet they ask the guy to get Bono's autograph for him, which he does, and then as they are leaving and paying their bill they're told: "Mr Springsteen has paid your bill".

Must have been told it a dozen times or more now. A taxi driver once told me this (with him apparently being the one who had asked for the autograph) while he was driving me to see the Boss at Croker. A guy in the Graham Norton 'red chair' also once told it to a huge round of applause. Cunts.


EDIT: here's the chap on the GN show.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kkf9n-WQ5Ik

I met Springsteen a couple of years ago, and the AMOUNT of people who tell me that story if I say anything about it is ridiculous.

jim salter wrote: »

I'm an Urban Legend

No, no,

I'm an urban legend,



and so is my wife!


(its The Life of Brian.before the wisecracks start:pac::pac::pac:)

The time one of the guys came back to the canteen early , only to find the cleaner removing his socks from the Burco boiler (used for making tea, for those who never heard of it - the boiler , not the socks).
I was going to embellish it a little and say it was his jocks. But then it would lose ALL credibility.:D

I worked with a bloke years ago who would constantly spew urban legends/myths at me either with himself or a mate as the protagonist.

He really must have thought I was a thick (I'm not THAT thick)