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Laura Whitmore: 'A man put his hand up my skirt in a nightclub and laughed'

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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,240 ✭✭✭✭B.A._Baracus


    Question... Did it really happen?
    Celebrities talk ****e. Let alone z-list celebrities using hot topic issues to put their name out there.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Except that's not what he said. Some drunken lout copping a feel and then being told to **** off is different to rape or serious sexual assault.

    Nobody saying that the drunken lout is right, but if you can't differentiate, therein lies the problem.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,853 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    Straightforward question: Have you ever put your hand up a stranger's skirt?

    Take it easy there, I was paraphrasing Creed from The American Office.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,816 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    I mean this is fair enough if you're not the kind of celeb who is courting that kind of shot but Laura has attended premieres where she has worn outfits that show off her panties and the like and you're playing with fire when you do that as naturally paps are just going to go for the most explicit shot they can. Here's an example.

    I do think up skirt shots are going too far but then, tbf, some female celebs have deliberately exposed their underwear and worse / better (depending on your perspective) in a brazen attempt at getting in the papers and that's bound to have a knock on effect on celebs who don't want such attention. So I think while I get where she's coming from, you really can't blame the paparazzi 100% on (at least all) the kind of photos that's she's referring to.


    I know some women deliberately flash photographers but the thing is that there are also photographers that target everyone whether they want the attention or not. And I think that's the practice that's being referred to. If you're not the kind of person who's flashing underwear for attention then you shouldn't have to worry about it.

    Then again who's to blame? The photographer, or the websites that pay for the photo's or even the people who visit those sites. I think the only person in the process who's entirely innocent is the innocent woman who didn't want a photographer taking photo's of her underwear.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    Grayson wrote: »
    If you're not the kind of person who's flashing underwear for attention then you shouldn't have to worry about it.

    Did you just read the first paragraph of my reply? I also said:
    .....that's bound to have a knock on effect on celebs who don't want such attention. So I think while I get where she's coming from, you really can't blame the paparazzi 100%....

    Why don't these women condemn the Bella Hadids of this world? They're as much responsible for creating a market for this stuff as anyone else.

    https://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/most-embarrassing-red-carpet-dresses-8766120
    https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/3586543/bella-hadid-flashes-her-knickers-in-cannes-a-year-after-wearing-that-dress-on-the-red-carpet/


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,582 ✭✭✭khaldrogo


    So just to be clear, you reckon that YOU have the right to decide who gets to touch MY body, and how/when they touch MY body? And same for my wife and my daughter - it is YOUR standard of touching up that is relevant, and not THEIR personal choice about who/how/when they are touched?


    I said absolutely nothing even close to this.......


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,737 ✭✭✭Yer Da sells Avon


    padd b1975 wrote: »
    Take it easy there, I was paraphrasing Creed from The American Office.

    I have never seen the American Office because it's bad.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,966 ✭✭✭corks finest


    Hope he got his hand back


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,853 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    I have never seen the American Office because it's bad.

    You'd probably be triggered....


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,302 ✭✭✭✭Sleeper12


    You've hit the nail on the head. The guys that keep saying that a woman groped them so what is the big deal. I wonder would there reaction be the same if a gay man groped them.

    Edit : not suggesting that gay men or women go around groping people. Just using the scenario as an example


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,816 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    I have never seen the American Office because it's bad.

    Wash your mouth out with soap.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,074 ✭✭✭kittensmittens


    I was sexually assaulted in Tipp Town in 2009.

    Tough looking common bint took a shine and started feeling up me arse at the bar .


    Later on in the night our groups were sitting together and she started fiddling up my leg trying to get at my equipment.


    All my friends burst their holes laughing at it.


    In reality it upset me but I didn't say anything.


    It had no lasting impact me , I got over it , just a creepy 40 plus rough wan
    This kinda sh1t will happen to every one in their lifetimes.

    Thing is though, how many times has a "rough aul bint" grabbed your tackle?
    From your post it would seem this happened once to you. And it upset you.
    Which is TOTALLY UNDERSTANDABLE! She should never have put her hands on a stranger in that manner, bang out of order.

    But I think what an awful lot of men especially dont get when it comes to this sort of thing that for a lot of women, this ISNT just a once off thing in their lifetime!!! For some women this goes on EVERY SINGLE night they go out.
    Its really not that uncommon tbh and believe me it ends up becoming a real issue for the women involved. It can be very easy to mitigate it but try dealing with it on an ongoing basis and it can be very troubling.
    As for someone saying report it to the guards? :D:D
    90% of the time the bouncers etc dont even want to know never mind the guards


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,739 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    khaldrogo wrote: »

    Drunken men or women pinching arses or whatnot is not sexual assault.

    A rapist/pedo/abusive person deserves their life to be spent locked up, a drunk who grabs a boob.......not so much.

    It might not be an offence worth locking someone up over, but someone who does that deserves a good thump and society in general pointing out that it is not acceptable behaviour.

    Minimising the sh!ttyness of the act by making out that women are overreacting emboldens these arseholes to do it again, and maybe they won’t stop at just pinching her arse next time.

    they’re the woman’s breasts. Other people do not get to touch them without her consent.

    And for the ‘I got my arse felt by a hen night and i’m Ok’ people; well, those women doing that wasn’t ok either. That behaviour is also not acceptable.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,737 ✭✭✭Yer Da sells Avon


    All my friends burst their holes laughing at it.

    If my friends reacted like that, I'd consider getting some new ones.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    kylith wrote: »
    And for the ‘I got my arse felt by a hen night and i’m Ok’ people; well, those women doing that wasn’t ok either. That behaviour is also not acceptable.

    Would you also say that they deserve a "good thump" though? I doubt it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,739 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    Would you say that they deserve a "good thump" though? I doubt it.

    One could say that based on the weight and strength disparity between men and women meaning that the man would almost certainly not be at the same risk from her as a woman would be from a man in the same situation she should not get a thump, however if a man reacted to a woman sexually assaulting him in this way by giving her a whallop I personally would say she was asking for it, brought it on herself, and fully deserved it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,438 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    Thing is though, how many times has a "rough aul bint" grabbed your tackle?
    From your post it would seem this happened once to you. And it upset you.
    Which is TOTALLY UNDERSTANDABLE! She should never have put her hands on a stranger in that manner, bang out of order.

    But I think what an awful lot of men especially dont get when it comes to this sort of thing that for a lot of women, this ISNT just a once off thing in their lifetime!!! For some women this goes on EVERY SINGLE night they go out.
    Its really not that uncommon tbh and believe me it ends up becoming a real issue for the women involved. It can be very easy to mitigate it but try dealing with it on an ongoing basis and it can be very troubling.
    As for someone saying report it to the guards? :D:D
    90% of the time the bouncers etc dont even want to know never mind the guards

    For such back serious discussion topic , why add in the two stupid smiley face things and where'd you get the statistic percentage of 90% .


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,739 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    For such back serious discussion topic , why add in the two stupid smiley face things and where'd you get the statistic percentage of 90% .

    Because as said the chances even of a bouncer kicking the guy who did it out of the pub are laughable.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,438 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    kylith wrote: »
    Because as said the chances even of a bouncer kicking the guy who did it out of the pub are laughable.

    So the suggestion is that bouncers are complicit and accept this behaviour ?

    If that's accepted as a norm wherever you socialise , then I'd be taking a good look at where you drink.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,739 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    So the suggestion is that bouncers are complicit and accept this behaviour ?

    If that's accepted as a norm wherever you socialise , then I'd be taking a good look at where you drink.

    That is what i’m saying.

    Thankfully this has not happened to me for some time. I no longer go to nightclubs, which has probably helped mitigate it, but does nothing to solve the problem. And i’m sure you can accept that it rankles to have to change my behaviour to avoid men trying to stick their hands up my skirt rather than it being universally condemned for men to grope women. In this very thread we’ve seen a man say his friends have done it and he didn’t say anything. It is not confined solely to nightclubs or pubs - I have also been groped in shops.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    kylith wrote: »
    One could say that based on the weight and strength disparity between men and women meaning that the man would almost certainly not be at the same risk from her as a woman would be from a man in the same situation she should not get a thump, however if a man reacted to a woman sexually assaulting him in this way by giving her a whallop I personally would say she was asking for it, brought it on herself, and fully deserved it.

    Well, we're talking about nightclubs, not alleyways, and so I don't think there is a much of a difference in the 'risk factor' in such situations as you're suggesting. But interesting to know that you at least wouldn't have a problem with up kilt groping women getting a 'whallop'. Personally I think a push would suffice.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,438 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    kylith wrote: »
    That is what i’m saying.

    Thankfully this has not happened to me for some time. I no longer go to nightclubs, which has probably helped mitigate it, but does nothing to solve the problem. And i’m sure you can accept that it rankles to have to change my behaviour to avoid men trying to stick their hands up my skirt rather than it being universally condemned for men to grope women. In this very thread we’ve seen a man say his friends have done it and he didn’t say anything. It is not confined solely to nightclubs or pubs - I have also been groped in shops.

    I don't doubt what you're saying but the way your posting suggests that's it's acceptable behaviour , it's not ever.

    I'm really not going to ask for details , but if you've been groped in shops I take it you been to the Gardai .


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    As for someone saying report it to the guards? :D:D

    90% of the time the bouncers etc dont even want to know never mind the guards

    Total and utter baloney:
    Man jailed after 'forcibly groping' woman in Temple Bar

    A Health and Safety officer, who put his hand under a woman’s skirt and forcibly groped her as she walked through Temple Bar, has been jailed for six-months.

    Bryan Doherty, 36, from Co. Mayo but who has an address at Ashington Close, Navan Road, Dublin, followed the woman before he put his hand under her skirt, grabbed her forcibly and then walked away. He was identified from pictures taken by the woman immediately after the attack.

    Groping women is taken very seriously in our society. It's absolute nonsense to suggest otherwise.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,816 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    Total and utter baloney:



    Groping women is taken very seriously in our society. It's absolute nonsense to suggest otherwise.

    I guess that story you posted of one occurrence completly invalidates all the actual experience of women here.

    How is it that when a topic like this comes up and women share their experiences some guy has to be confrontational. There's always a guy who thinks he knows more about it than a woman.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,438 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    Grayson wrote: »
    I guess that story you posted of one occurrence completly invalidates all the actual experience of women here.

    How is it that when a topic like this comes us and women share their experiences some guy has to be confrontational. There's always a guy who thinks he knows more about it than a woman.

    No body's doubting the experiences details but there's a suggestion that both Gardai , doormen and society is accepting of this behaviour.

    I've a wife , sisters , neices and lots of female friends and I'd be disgusted if any them experienced this behaviour but I'd be pretty disturbed if the felt it was pointless to anything about it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,816 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    No body's doubting the experiences details but there's a suggestion that both Gardai , doormen and society is accepting of this behaviour.

    I've a wife , sisters , neices and lots of female friends and I'd be disgusted if any them experienced this behaviour but I'd be pretty disturbed if the felt it was pointless to anything about it.

    Have you ever said that to them?
    Or have you ever told a friend that certain language or attitudes are unacceptable?

    Im sure that you're actually a great person but it's quite possible that something may have happened to someone you care about and they wouldn't mention it. It could be because they don't want to discuss something disturbing. Maybe they don't want to upset you. Maybe they just want to forget about it.

    I'd say most women have experienced some form of physical or verbal harassment. I'd say it's worse at night when alcohol is involved. And it's not like it's the majority of men are perpetrators but there are enough creeps to mean that most women get harassed at some point.

    There's also the fact that for centuries this was acceptable. It's only in the last couple of decades we've seen change. We've changed a lot but we're not perfect yet.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 50 ✭✭ChrisWeiland


    While I obviously abhor unwanted groping the gist of the rest of the Laura Whitmore interview can be surmised as "Woman who posed for FHM complains about being objectified by men"

    Forgive me for thinking she is jumping on the metoo thing for self promotion


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,302 ✭✭✭✭Sleeper12


    While I obviously abhor unwanted groping the gist of the Laura Whitmore interview can be surmised as "Woman who posed for FHM complains about being objectified by men"


    Ah jasus. Just because she poses in fhm doesn't mean that she wants a strangers hand shoved between her legs.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 379 ✭✭Appledreams15


    While I obviously abhor unwanted groping the gist of the Laura Whitmore interview can be surmised as "Woman who posed for FHM complains about being objectified by men"

    She posed for FHM -her choice.
    A man touched her without her consent -not her choice.
    How are they in anyway related?

    Because David Beckham posed in pants I can go up and grab his dick?
    I've never thought that


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,423 ✭✭✭✭Outlaw Pete


    Grayson wrote: »
    I guess that story you posted of one occurrence completly invalidates all the actual experience of women here.

    It's far from that one case, that was just the most recent that came to mind. Here's another recent one I remember from December:
    Man denies sexually assaulting bar worker

    A man has gone on trial charged with sexually assaulting a bar worker on the dance floor of a late night bar in Dublin.

    Donal Geoghegan, 37, from Oakdale Park, Ballycullen in Dublin, has pleaded not guilty to sexually assaulting the woman in the bar on 21 November 2015.

    Prosecuting lawyers told the jury it was alleged Mr Geoghegan sexually assaulted the then 20-year-old woman (by touching her in the vaginal area on the outside of her clothes) as she walked past him while carrying empty glasses on the dance floor.

    Prosecuting counsel Lisa Dempsey said the woman felt a hand move across her thigh towards her vagina.

    She said the woman immediately turned around and identified the man who had done it.

    The court heard the venue's head of security and general manager spoke to him, but he declined to provide them with personal details and made no admissions relating to the incident.

    Defence Counsel Michael O'Higgins said Mr Geoghegan contended that the woman was not touched by him, and if she was, it was accidental and unintentional.

    Trial collapsed as CCTV showed that another man could possibly have done it but it's quite clear given that it ended up on court that such things are not easily dismissed by Gardai.
    How is it that when a topic like this comes up and women share their experiences some guy has to be confrontational.

    Are we to ignore nonsense statements because we're not women?

    Also, maybe you didn't notice, but many a female AH regulars are quite capable of being confrontational themselves.


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