Called a Homophobic

freshpopcorn · 28-09-2017 10:28PM

Ultimate Seduction wrote: »

If a person is gay, black or Muslim, you have to like them no matter how much of an dickhead they are.

You have to put up with them not like them!

Snotty · 28-09-2017 10:31PM

wakka12 wrote: »

'I hate how camp he is' implies his sexuality is part of the problem and why you dont like him. If you simply say hes loud and obnoxious I can guarantee people would have no problem with it and see where youre coming from.
Cuts out any problems with homophobia

So it's not OK to dislike some for being camp?

One eyed Jack · 28-09-2017 10:32PM

wakka12 wrote: »

'I hate how camp he is' implies his sexuality is part of the problem and why you dont like him. If you simply say hes loud and obnoxious I can guarantee people would have no problem with it and see where youre coming from.
Cuts out any problems with homophobia

Only if you associate being camp with being gay in the first place.

paleoperson · 28-09-2017 11:05PM

wakka12 wrote: »

'I hate how camp he is' implies his sexuality is part of the problem and why you dont like him. If you simply say hes loud and obnoxious I can guarantee people would have no problem with it and see where youre coming from.
Cuts out any problems with homophobia

What are you talking about? Being camp has nothing to do with being gay any more than being loud has to do with being heterosexual.

spoonerhead · 28-09-2017 11:10PM

I got called homophobic when I told a drama queen to ‘**** off’ before. He was annoying my friends and knocked over my friend bouncing around like a fairy.

I’m gay myself....

mynamejeff · 28-09-2017 11:18PM

might be he inst even gay

just an attention seeking twat

Snotty · 28-09-2017 11:31PM

mynamejeff wrote: »

might be he inst even gay

just an attention seeking twat

Don't know, he's certainly making it apparent that's he's gay but it wouldn't surprise me if all a big show for attention

wakka12 · 29-09-2017 12:22PM

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Only if you associate being camp with being gay in the first place.

literally everyone associates camp with homosexuality.
The modern definition means something like exaggerated behaviour, self parodying
Though the orginins are completely related to homosexuality, hence the modern day connotations
Old oxford definition
In 1909, the Oxford English Dictionary gave the first print citation of camp as. ostentatious, exaggerated, affected, theatrical; effeminate or homosexual; pertaining to, characteristic of, homosexuals. So as a noun, 'camp' behaviour, mannerisms, et cetera.

Immaculata · 29-09-2017 12:35PM

You may or may not be homophobic. Being camp as a row of tents is often associated with being gay. So disliking someone for being camp could be misconstrued as being homophobic. If in the situation you decide for some godforsaken reason to express your negative feelings about person A, and you're telling person A you don't like them, or at least telling person B why you don't like person A, then choose your words carefully and say exactly what bugs you, like is person A louder than you? More prone to getting glitter on your stuff? More stylish and interesting? - rather than using the word 'camp'. Or any reasonable person would be justified in thinking you are in fact homophobic. I think it's interesting that you don't like this person for being 'over the top' - like, seriously, is there a level of appearing to be gay that it is acceptable to you? Are gay people in general fine with you as long as you can't tell they're gay? Some questions to ponder while you figure out whether you're homophobic or not...

One eyed Jack · 29-09-2017 12:44PM

wakka12 wrote: »

literally everyone associates camp with homosexuality.
The modern definition means something like exaggerated behaviour, self parodying
Though the orginins are completely related to homosexuality, hence the modern day connotations
Old oxford definition
In 1909, the Oxford English Dictionary gave the first print citation of camp as. ostentatious, exaggerated, affected, theatrical; effeminate or homosexual; pertaining to, characteristic of, homosexuals. So as a noun, 'camp' behaviour, mannerisms, et cetera.

No literally everyone doesn't make the same same associations between camp behaviour and homosexuality that you think they do, and that's why a minority of gay men adopt an (what they think are effeminate traits) affectation and behaviours that they associate with being gay. That's why such behaviours are a head melt, because they're exaggerated for dramatic effect, f-all to do with being gay.

farmerwifelet · 29-09-2017 12:46PM

I don't particularly care who sleeps with who but I do find over the top "campness" annoying as hell. Why anyone feels the need to announce they are gay by sounding like they are sitting on a tumtak is beyond me. Ditto lesbians who feel the need to look like they fell into a lumberjacks wardrobe or that of a 1950's housewife.

Be who you want, love who you want but attention seeking drama - leave it at the door please.

wakka12 · 29-09-2017 12:50PM

One eyed Jack wrote: »

No literally everyone doesn't make the same same associations between camp behaviour and homosexuality that you think they do, and that's why a minority of gay men adopt an (what they think are effeminate traits) affectation and behaviours that they associate with being gay. That's why such behaviours are a head melt, because they're exaggerated for dramatic effect, f-all to do with being gay.

If a man is camp, the vast majority of people will assume he's gay. Thats why theres an association
It doesn't mean all gay people are camp
If you say you hate somebody because theyre camp, and most men who are camp are gay, it can come off as homophobic for that reason

Nearly every camp man Ive met has been gay
Most gay men I know, are not camp though

AnneFrank · 29-09-2017 12:52PM

if a camp or drama queen type person walks into a room i walk out,
wouldn't offend them or judge them, i just don't like them.
you can like/dislike who you want,
i personally like Donald Trump for the hilarity he brings to my life,
but a alot of people don't, that's fine by me

AustinLostin · 29-09-2017 12:52PM

You sound like a bit of a drama queen tbh

marienbad · 29-09-2017 12:53PM

farmerwifelet wrote: »

I don't particularly care who sleeps with who but I do find over the top "campness" annoying as hell. Why anyone feels the need to announce they are gay by sounding like they are sitting on a tumtak is beyond me. Ditto lesbians who feel the need to look like they fell into a lumberjacks wardrobe or that of a 1950's housewife.

Be who you want, love who you want but attention seeking drama - leave it at the door please.

Why are the traits we dislike in others always dismissed as 'attention seeking drama ' ?

One eyed Jack · 29-09-2017 12:57PM

wakka12 wrote: »

If a man is camp, the vast majority of people will assume he's gay. Thats why theres an association
It doesn't mean all gay people are camp
If you say you hate somebody because theyre camp, and most men who are camp are gay, it can come off as homophobic for that reason

Nearly every camp man Ive met has been gay
Most gay men I know, are not camp though

Only to those people who make that association in the first place, which is the point of the opening post - just because someone has no time for guys who like to camp it up for attention, doesn't mean they're homophobic. It just means they have no time for guys who like to camp it up for attention.

I don't meet that many camp men tbh, never mind whether I stick around long enough to have them tell me they're gay. I couldn't care less for whether they're gay or straight, I can tell already we're not going to get along :pac:

jmayo · 29-09-2017 01:00PM

Immaculata wrote: »

You may or may not be homophobic. Being camp as a row of tents is often associated with being gay. So disliking someone for being camp could be misconstrued as being homophobic. If in the situation you decide for some godforsaken reason to express your negative feelings about person A, and you're telling person A you don't like them, or at least telling person B why you don't like person A, then choose your words carefully and say exactly what bugs you, like is person A louder than you? More prone to getting glitter on your stuff? More stylish and interesting? - rather than using the word 'camp'. Or any reasonable person would be justified in thinking you are in fact homophobic. I think it's interesting that you don't like this person for being 'over the top' - like, seriously, is there a level of appearing to be gay that it is acceptable to you? Are gay people in general fine with you as long as you can't tell they're gay? Some questions to ponder while you figure out whether you're homophobic or not...

Interesting that you equate being camp with being more stylish and interesting.

So are you also saying that appearing to be gay = camp ?
I know quiet a few gay guys who don't act like Larry Grayson.
I don't think it makes them any less gay.

Why not ponder your own outlook rather than the OPs?

BTW some gay people can be loud obnoxious ar**es just like a lot of straight people can be loud obnoxious ar**es.
Sexuality doesn't determine personality.

lazybones32 · 29-09-2017 01:01PM

Immaculata wrote: »

You may or may not be homophobic. Being camp as a row of tents is often associated with being gay. So disliking someone for being camp could be misconstrued as being homophobic. If in the situation you decide for some godforsaken reason to express your negative feelings about person A, and you're telling person A you don't like them, or at least telling person B why you don't like person A, then choose your words carefully and say exactly what bugs you, like is person A louder than you? More prone to getting glitter on your stuff? More stylish and interesting? - rather than using the word 'camp'. Or any reasonable person would be justified in thinking you are in fact homophobic. I think it's interesting that you don't like this person for being 'over the top' - like, seriously, is there a level of appearing to be gay that it is acceptable to you? Are gay people in general fine with you as long as you can't tell they're gay? Some questions to ponder while you figure out whether you're homophobic or not...

Sounds like a crock of crap to me...

The girliest of girls would have to work hard to be as feminine/camp as some gay men are. It is affected...put on ... an act. There's nothing wrong in disliking someone for who they are or who they're pretending to be.

lazybones32 · 29-09-2017 01:08PM

farmerwifelet wrote: »

...Ditto lesbians who feel the need to look like they fell into a lumberjacks wardrobe or that of a 1950's housewife.

What i don't get is: lesbians like women but some lesbians like women who act as if they are men. Liking butch women seems like wanting a manly woman. Being attracted to male attributes but in a woman- "man light"? Doesn't make sense to me.

marienbad · 29-09-2017 01:11PM

lazybones32 wrote: »

What i don't get is: lesbians like women but some lesbians like women who act as if they are men. Liking butch women seems like wanting a manly woman. Being attracted to male attributes but in a woman- "man light"? Doesn't make sense to me.

Why should it make sense to you ?

lazybones32 · 29-09-2017 01:24PM

Cos i like to understand.

Widdershins · 29-09-2017 01:30PM

spoonerhead wrote: »

I got called homophobic when I told a drama queen to ‘**** off’ before. He was annoying my friends and knocked over my friend bouncing around like a fairy.

I’m gay myself....

I have a very camp acquaintance. When you get to know him he tones it down, he only seems to ham it up when he doesn't know you.

This, and having hands flapped in my face, and being shrieked at ''darling'' and ''bitch'' (affectionately) does get a bit wearing.

His gushing compliments about my hair totally make up for it though. haha.

marienbad · 29-09-2017 01:33PM

lazybones32 wrote: »

Cos i like to understand.

Not much chance of that when your mind is already made up .

Widdershins · 29-09-2017 01:34PM

lazybones32 wrote: »

What i don't get is: lesbians like women but some lesbians like women who act as if they are men. Liking butch women seems like wanting a manly woman. Being attracted to male attributes but in a woman- "man light"? Doesn't make sense to me.

And bisexuals....I find androgynous women quite attractive..not butch, growly, men-hating women, but athletically lean and with well-cut short hair. They can have a way of walking and moving that's really compelling. They don't look like the type of men I usually like.

Its like, you are a woman but you have some 'male' qualities, it is an interesting combination.

lazybones32 · 29-09-2017 01:36PM

marienbad wrote: »

Not much chance of that when your mind is already made up .

Well, would you like to offer your insights into the psychology of same-sex attraction? I'll wait with bated breath...

marienbad · 29-09-2017 01:41PM

lazybones32 wrote: »

Well, would you like to offer your insights into the psychology of same-sex attraction? I'll wait with bated breath...

Why would I even want to do that ? Just accept people as they are .

OldMrBrennan83 · 29-09-2017 01:44PM

This post has been deleted.

lazybones32 · 29-09-2017 01:49PM

marienbad wrote: »

Why would I even want to do that ? Just accept people as they are .

So you can't.
I like to understand and human behaviour is very understandable. So, either put on your thinking cap or pi$$ off and less of your attempts of sassing me with your 'having your mind made up' comments.

lazybones32 · 29-09-2017 01:51PM

Widdershins wrote: »

And bisexuals....I find androgynous women quite attractive..not butch, growly, men-hating women, but athletically lean and with well-cut short hair. They can have a way of walking and moving that's really compelling. They don't look like the type of men I usually like.

Its like, you are a woman but you have some 'male' qualities, it is an interesting combination.

Are you bicyexual?
Have you a stronger urge towards one sex or the other? Why?

Night Falls · 29-09-2017 01:58PM

AnneFrank wrote: »

if a camp or drama queen type person walks into a room i walk out,
wouldn't offend them or judge them, i just don't like them.
you can like/dislike who you want,
i personally like Donald Trump for the hilarity he brings to my life,
but a alot of people don't, that's fine by me

Who, ironically, is the campest ever president.

Called a Homophobic

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