Whats the most Awkward position you've ever found yourself in

Lilmiss82 · 13-04-2017 5:08pm #1

I don't mean sex position here. I mean what has been the most awkward place you've ever been in in your entire life and wanted the ground to swally ye up! Just a bit of fun of a Thursday evening as I'm home alone and bored out my brains!

Noddyholder · 13-04-2017 5:13pm

You go first...

TallGlass · 13-04-2017 5:17pm

Someone opening the jax door while having a ****é

Lyle Lanley · 13-04-2017 5:24pm

What's the most awkward position you've been in lilmiss? I do mean sex position.

begbysback · 13-04-2017 5:26pm

Centre half - I'm only 5'4

Lilmiss82 · 13-04-2017 5:31pm

Noddyholder wrote: »

You go first...

Oh I've had many of these moments!! One pretty awkward moment would have been my Brother walking in whilst DTD with one of my exes. We were doing a bit of role play and it would have been the last thing my bro wanted to see.... But the most AWKWARD AWKWARD moment would have been me sleepily walking out of my hotel door (thinking it was the jax) and closing the door behind me..... Only to realise I'm out in the hallway.... STARKERS!! Then trying to knock on the door to my friend, as quietly as possible so as to not attract any attention to myself but loud enough so that she can hear me - my friend, who is comotosed on the bed after a night full of drink doesn't hear a thing, so I try to softly call her.... But nothing! Then after a couple of minutes passed (which felt like hours btw) and the fella opposite our room comes out to see what all the fuss is about... probably came out to tell me to shut the F up!! :eek::eek::eek: I'm still pretty drunk from the night before so I try to act all cool about it but I can see the fella about to burst out laughing... Either that or he wanted the ground to swally him whole too!! Luckily enough he was very kind and threw me a towel to leg it down to reception to grab a key!! Thank the lord he was staying with his girlfriend and was the only person that got to see me in my birthday suit that night!! I was MORTIFIED!! I can only imagine the shame if it was a loada lads!! :eek::eek: Had to face him the next morning at breakfast sitting with his Significant other!! Oh the shame!! I still want to die when I think about it!

:(

Lilmiss82 · 13-04-2017 5:33pm

Lyle Lanley wrote: »

What's the most awkward position you've been in lilmiss? I do mean sex position.

Maybe I'd get more replies if I made the post about sex positions!! I'm into my yoga me so don't really find myself in awkward positions as such!

Fart · 13-04-2017 6:13pm

Lilmiss82 wrote: »

Maybe I'd get more replies if I made the post about sex positions!! I'm into my yoga me so don't really find myself in awkward positions as such!

Go on...

Lilmiss82 · 13-04-2017 6:16pm

Fart wrote: »

Go on...

well they may look awkward but with a bit of flexibility they're as easy to get out of!!

:p

osarusan · 13-04-2017 6:18pm

Was giving a presentation which was pretty critical of a particular researcher and his research. Looked out into the audience before I started and there he was.

Four Phucs Ache · 13-04-2017 8:59pm

1995.I was 15. One of the girls we hung around with had a free gaf.

One of the lads got a porno from his older brother and we threw it on.Feckin deadly it was.

I went upstairs to see if there was any hair gel as I was going to copy the fella off the porno who had gelled spiky hair and come back down into the room and proclaim "who's Dr dick now"!

I hear a load of noise and then nothing.

I came down the stairs and into the kitchen and the lot of them had legged it.

Her mother was standing there with the face of hell on her and in the background all you could here was "oh oh oh doctor , doctor your so good, oh oh ah ah ah ah etc"

Wait till I tell your mother SIT DOWN she says.

So I did.

She left and went out the back looking for the rest of them and left the porno on.

Had the whole thing to myself for a good 5 mins while she killed me friends hiding in the shed!

Me mother laughed!

PTH2009 · 17-04-2017 12:07pm

In 2014 I went to a fall out boy concert in the Olympia and I felt very old (was only 24 at the time )and the place was full of screaming teenage girls. I was prob the only guy there lol

razorblunt · 17-04-2017 12:11pm

Once, at a drunken game of Twister ...

Sugarlumps · 18-04-2017 7:46am

Pretty interesting morning, went to the toilet before I left home. Five minutes from Booterstown, a fuse is lit, instantly transformed into Jack Bauer.

Excruciating pain waiting on the lights to turn green. Labour in reverse. Radio off, full concertation, I felt at that moment, I could bend spoons much like Uri Geller.

Like a scene from Normandy, I bit down hard, we’ve got a shít storm.

Barely made it to my destination, not a moment to spare. Bolted out the car, ducked under the smallest wall ever constructed at Booterstown and reached for the stars. Anticipating a jogger, morning! Sadly never came to fruition.

The cycle in was, uncomfortable. Day could hardly get any worse? Unless cctv footage is later broadcasted on crime watch?

amtc · 18-04-2017 5:06pm

My friend sleep walks and has stayed in a city centre hotel for extended periods over the last number of years. He has twice walked out naked into Temple Bar at 2 to 3 am. He is very careful and keeps his key card. Once a staff member managed to find him. Once he came back in by himself and went into an open room that was being decorated. Found by painters under dust sheet.

For me, I went to a meeting where I knew some people and had heard of this guy for years but had only spoken on phone. So I didnt catch intros and asked him if he knew John Smith to which he replied.he was John Smith

Your Face · 18-04-2017 5:13pm

Anytime I go to a match on my own.
Its seems to confuse some people.

Cloudio9 · 18-04-2017 5:19pm

amtc wrote: »

He has twice walked out naked into Temple Bar at 2 to 3 am.

Ever think he should stop sleeping in the nip ?

MilesMorales1 · 18-04-2017 6:01pm

When I first moved to Ireland in 2009, I got stranded in Belfast over night, no money, no mobile, didn't know anyone at all, didn't have the head on me to go to the police even. Pretty awkward night so it was.

amtc · 19-04-2017 4:47am

Cloudio9 wrote: »

amtc wrote: »

He has twice walked out naked into Temple Bar at 2 to 3 am.

Ever think he should stop sleeping in the nip ?

That's the point...he doesn't....but carefully takes off and folds his clothes before the excursion.

steddyeddy · 19-04-2017 7:07am

osarusan wrote: »

Was giving a presentation which was pretty critical of a particular researcher and his research. Looked out into the audience before I started and there he was.

Did he comment on it?

amtc · 19-04-2017 7:14am

Oh I once introduced a good work friend to her own husband at a function. He was known to me as John through work and she called him JP when chit chatting about her husband. They didn't work together but I worked with both.

So I went in Bridget Jones style with where you introduce people with two interesting facts. They laughed ...

me_right_one · 19-04-2017 7:15am

Sugarlumps wrote: »

Pretty interesting morning, went to the toilet before I left home. Five minutes from Booterstown, a fuse is lit, instantly transformed into Jack Bauer.

Excruciating pain waiting on the lights to turn green. Labour in reverse. Radio off, full concertation, I felt at that moment, I could bend spoons much like Uri Geller.

Like a scene from Normandy, I bit down hard, we’ve got a shít storm.

Barely made it to my destination, not a moment to spare. Bolted out the car, ducked under the smallest wall ever constructed at Booterstown and reached for the stars. Anticipating a jogger, morning! Sadly never came to fruition.

The cycle in was, uncomfortable. Day could hardly get any worse? Unless cctv footage is later broadcasted on crime watch?

?????????????

md23040 · 19-04-2017 8:45pm

My sister who's a bit of a character, told me that back in the 1980's when she was 21 she went with her boyfriend to some Med resort that allowed nudity, and herself and the boyfriend decided to give it a go for the laugh. Two minutes in, and not used to so many naked and tanned female forms yer man gets a boner and decides to get in the depths of the water to cool off.

She found this hilarious but then she horribly spies coming towards her a couple in their late 50's that are very good friends of my parents, fully clothed and ultra conservative.

It was an absurd father-tedesque moment with this polite conversation of how's your mother etc and isn't it lovely here, while she tries to cover herself awkwardly and praying yer man doesn't come out of the water with his semi, to see who she's talking too.

She was totally mortified and scared to death, but at least he stayed in the water with his big dopey grin.

Thespoofer · 19-04-2017 8:50pm

Whats DTD ?

Mister Vain · 19-04-2017 8:50pm

I came before she had a chance to put the johnny on.

Thespoofer · 19-04-2017 8:52pm

Oh hang on, Doing The Deed ! ( I think

Mister Vain · 19-04-2017 8:54pm

Ahh that's what it is. I thought it was a wrestling move.

everlast75 · 19-04-2017 8:55pm

When I dropped my trousers and underwear for a prostate exam and noticed the doctor's were next to mine

Widdershins · 19-04-2017 9:07pm

I was complaining about someone who had done something nasty to me a few years ago and I had no idea the person had died last year.

Mucky_Tackies · 19-04-2017 9:08pm

working in an office in the States and were having a staff photo. instead of saying cheese, in our family we always said "knickers". seems they dont have that word in the US and the black staff member took exception to me shouting "knickers" given they thought i was saying something, err, similar sounding.

mad muffin · 19-04-2017 9:25pm

I was elbow deep whenâ€¦ wellâ€¦ y'all know the rest.

me_right_one · 20-04-2017 8:24am

mad muffin wrote: »

I was elbow deep whenâ€¦ wellâ€¦ y'all know the rest.

Whats the story with all the cryptic messages in this thread???

You were elbow deep - in what?

When - When what?

You know the rest - No, we don't. Thats the part you're supposed to write about.

Whats the most Awkward position you've ever found yourself in

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