Accusations of sexual assault on "reality" tv show, double standards?

jimgoose · 19-01-2017 05:25PM

pilly wrote: »

I suspect the majority of men that have commented it's no big deal because Chloe did it would have decked Aaron for doing it. Total double standard right there and that's coming directly from men, nothing to do with women.

It has to be no big deal. If young Grimes decked Chloe over it that would definitely be worse!! :pac:

ScumLord · 19-01-2017 05:28PM

Young ones assaulting people with their bottoms, what has the world come too joe?

Jayop · 19-01-2017 05:31PM

I know when I was a young lad is a woman came up to me in a pub or club and rubbed herself up against me I wouldn't have been offended by it.

eviltwin · 19-01-2017 05:31PM

anna080 wrote: »

My post wasn't directed to evil twin, more the feminist movement as a whole. Tis a peculiar type of feminism that decries the objectification of women and calls men rapists but which ignores a man being assaulted by a woman on national tv. I mean the first and one of the most thanked post on this thread is a comment that says "who cares". Indeed.

And that post was by a man incidentally....

Look, I have a son, I don't expect him to grow up thinking that he's fair game for women like this. I don't think he should be expected to put up with this kind of behaviour because its not as bad when a woman does it or because men secretly love this kind of thing etc etc.

I am ****ing disgusted that its being treated as a joke when it would have been totally different if the roles were reveresed. I can get angry about it but until men themselves say this kind of thing is not okay people are probably not going to take it seriously and as you can see from the response on here, a lot of men don't have a major issue with it because they don't see it as threatening as they might had a man rubbed himself on a woman. That's got feck all to do with feminism and everything to do with the kind of messages we raise our boys with.

ScumLord · 19-01-2017 05:32PM

Jayop wrote: »

I know when I was a young lad is a woman came up to me in a pub or club and rubbed herself up against me I wouldn't have been offended by it.

What if she was half naked, wouldn't that make it worse?

jimgoose · 19-01-2017 05:32PM

ScumLord wrote: »

Young ones assaulting people with their bottoms, what has the world come too joe?

She's a fine big woman in fairness, Ted. :cool:

jimgoose · 19-01-2017 05:34PM

eviltwin wrote: »

And that post was by a man incidentally....

Look, I have a son, I don't expect him to grow up thinking that he's fair game for women like this. I don't think he should be expected to put up with this kind of behaviour because its not as bad when a woman does it or because men secretly love this kind of thing etc etc.

I am ****ing disgusted that its being treated as a joke when it would have been totally different if the roles were reveresed. I can get angry about it but until men themselves say this kind of thing is not okay people are probably not going to take it seriously and as you can see from the response on here, a lot of men don't have a major issue with it because they don't see it as threatening as they might had a man rubbed himself on a woman. That's got feck all to do with feminism and everything to do with the kind of messages we raise our boys with.

I think it's as simple as this: some of us tend to see things in terms of "Danger" vs. "No Danger". Arses/fannies/tits etc. aren't really here or there to us, except for their <HARRUMPH> asthetic value. :cool:

Jayop · 19-01-2017 05:34PM

ScumLord wrote: »

What if she was half naked, wouldn't that make it worse?

Erm... no.

Now, it's all about the time and the place. If it happened to me on live TV then yeah it would be embarassing. If it happened in work where a woman was your boss then yeah it would be totally inappropriate.

However like I said, from my own personal experiences, if a girl was grinding up on my n a Saturday night I'd have thought I won the lotto.

eviltwin · 19-01-2017 05:37PM

jimgoose wrote: »

I think it's as simple as this: some of us tend to see things in terms of "Danger" vs. "No Danger". Arses/fannies/tits etc. aren't really here or there to us, except for their <HARRUMPH> asthetic value. :cool:

That's understandable. Women tend to be less of a physically intimidating threat to men so its not as bad. Ultimately a man still has physical control over the situation. But he may not emotionally have control. I didn't see the show so I don't know how John or Edward was reacting to it but we should take our cues from that. If he was enjoying it and happy for it to happen then its a non story but if he was feeling intimidated or under pressure to put up with it for whatever reason then that has to be looked at.

ScumLord · 19-01-2017 05:38PM

eviltwin wrote: »

I am ****ing disgusted that its being treated as a joke when it would have been totally different if the roles were reveresed. I can get angry about it but until men themselves say this kind of thing is not okay people are probably not going to take it seriously and as you can see from the response on here, a lot of men don't have a major issue with it because they don't see it as threatening as they might had a man rubbed himself on a woman. That's got feck all to do with feminism and everything to do with the kind of messages we raise our boys with.

That they should run away crying if they see a naked woman?

I don't know why you're so adamant that we should get upset over this? Men and women are different, equality doesn't mean we all have to behave or react the same way.

A man probably couldn't really make an issue out of this without looking like their soft and easily upset. That may be a bad thing but men are men, we have behaviour that's different to women.

ohnonotgmail · 19-01-2017 05:38PM

Jayop wrote: »

Erm... no.

Now, it's all about the time and the place. If it happened to me on live TV then yeah it would be embarassing. If it happened in work where a woman was your boss then yeah it would be totally inappropriate.

However like I said, from my own personal experiences, if a girl was grinding up on my n a Saturday night I'd have thought I won the lotto.

in the case of yer wan the prize would be closer to a free scratch card than the jackpot.

jimgoose · 19-01-2017 05:39PM

eviltwin wrote: »

That's understandable. Women tend to be less of a physically intimidating threat to men so its not as bad. Ultimately a man still has physical control over the situation. But he may not emotionally have control. I didn't see the show so I don't know how John or Edward was reacting to it but we should take our cues from that. If he was enjoying it and happy for it to happen then its a non story but if he was feeling intimidated or under pressure to put up with it for whatever reason then that has to be looked at.

Aw, poor ickle half-Jeddyweddy is afwaid of the lady's bottom! :pac::pac::pac:

19-01-2017 05:40PM

anna080 wrote: »

Sorry but what a load of sh1t. Size has nothing to do with it. What if a man a foot smaller than you rubbed his penis off you? Or the same size?

If a man the same size as me assaulted me, I'd be in with more of a shot at defending myself.

Of course a person is more intimidated if a person much bigger than them assaults them rather than a person smaller.

If someone much smaller than you tries to punch your lights out, you have a better shot at defending yourself than if someone a foot taller and five or six stone heavier does.

Of course, the point still seems to be missed that it's still assault, and we're talking about the discrepancy of judgement, rather than the severity or significance of the gender.

To reiterate, for those who somehow missed it: it was assault, she should have been at least kicked off, and she is a disgusting human being for humiliating and intimidating the guy like that.

In other words, she's just as bad as a man who did the same thing is, and should be subject to the same censure.

I hope that's clear.

eviltwin · 19-01-2017 05:41PM

ScumLord wrote: »

That they should run away crying if they see a naked woman?

I don't know why you're so adamant that we should get upset over this? Men and women are different, equality doesn't mean we all have to behave or react the same way.

A man probably couldn't really make an issue out of this without looking like their soft and easily upset. That may be a bad thing but men are men, we have behaviour that's different to women.

We're not talking about the sight of a naked woman though are we? We are talking about a naked woman rubbing herself against you when you don't want it. I don't think anyone should be upset about it but at least accept that for some people in that situation it would be upsetting and they should be able to voice that without being seen as wimps or whatever.

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 05:41PM

pilly wrote: »

This is totally irrelevant, she didn't just flash her tits at him, she rubbed her arse up and down on him, 2 totally different scenarios.

He equated flashing of tits as sexual assault in a previous post. I was seeing if he'd feel he was a victim of an assault if it happened to him.

Jayop · 19-01-2017 05:41PM

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

in the case of yer wan the prize would be closer to a free scratch card than the jackpot.

I didn't see the pics or watch the video. Got the gist of what happened from chat in the office.

And anyway, back to my Saturday night situation, not everyone is an oil painting but everyone deserves he right to try to get some lovin./

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 05:46PM

pilly wrote: »

I suspect the majority of men that have commented it's no big deal because Chloe did it would have decked Aaron for doing it. Total double standard right there and that's coming directly from men, nothing to do with women.

But your man allegedly repeatedly flashed her even after she repeatedly told him to stop. That's where you cross the line imo.

If the Geordie one repeatedly engaged in the behaviour despite being told not to then she'd be as bad as your man.

Special Circumstances · 19-01-2017 05:50PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

But your man allegedly repeatedly flashed her even after she repeatedly told him to stop. That's where you cross the line imo.

If the Geordie one repeatedly engaged in the behaviour despite being told not to then she'd be as bad as your man.

So a one-off by either sex is OK? Or just one sex is allowed to get away with it?

I love these threads where the real double-think and contradictions come out.

ScumLord · 19-01-2017 05:53PM

eviltwin wrote: »

We're not talking about the sight of a naked woman though are we? We are talking about a naked woman rubbing herself against you when you don't want it. I don't think anyone should be upset about it but at least accept that for some people in that situation it would be upsetting and they should be able to voice that without being seen as wimps or whatever.

And has the man in question actually said their upset about it? It's everybody else getting upset on his behalf. They see something on TV and put on their homemade judge wig and starting handing out arbitrary judgements based on zero experience and disregarding the people actually involved.

A naked woman rubbing up against someone else isn't an assault. Being naked isn't an assault, rubbing up against someone isn't an assault. Only our modern social constructs and facebook hysterics say that it is an assault.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 19-01-2017 05:56PM

She doesn't know any better.

Most of that Geordie Shore crowd are complete trash. This woman in particular has zero class and limited mental capacity.

19-01-2017 05:56PM

ScumLord wrote: »

A naked woman rubbing up against someone else isn't an assault. Being naked isn't an assault, rubbing up against someone isn't an assault. Only our modern social constructs and facebook hysterics say that it is an assault.

An unwelcome naked person rubbing their bare backside on an unwilling victim is most definitely assault.

He might be able to tolerate it, he might not even mind it, but it's still assault. No mental gymnastics involved, no hysterics either.

SnakePlissken · 19-01-2017 05:58PM

ScumLord wrote: »

A naked woman rubbing up against someone else isn't an assault. Being naked isn't an assault, rubbing up against someone isn't an assault. Only our modern social constructs and facebook hysterics say that it is an assault.

So by your definition, should I feel compelled to whip my lad out and run it across your forehead you wouldn't consider this assault? Can you now see how preposterous your argument is?

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 05:58PM

Special Circumstances wrote: »

So a one-off by either sex is OK? Or just one sex is allowed to get away with it?

I love these threads where the real double-think and contradictions come out.

Where's the doublethink or contradictions.
I already said in previous posts anything involving penis or vagina/vulva etc was a no-no.

The actions of the Geordie were very mild imo but if the other person told her to stop and she repeated the action then I'd call it harassment. If there's contradiction or doublethink in that please point it out.

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 05:59PM

SnakePlissken wrote: »

So by your definition, should I feel compelled to whip my lad out and run it across your forehead you wouldn't consider this assault? Can you now see how preposterous your argument is?

How can you consider what she did and what you describe as being comparable?

Glenster · 19-01-2017 06:09PM

Its an issue that no one involved cares about.

This is just a bunch of bored keyboard warriors looking for something to be outraged by.

Just ignore it and it'll go away. Its not symptomatic of a societal failing, or a blatant double standard. People need to relax.

Special Circumstances · 19-01-2017 06:19PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

Where's the doublethink or contradictions.
I already said in previous posts anything involving penis or vagina/vulva etc was a no-no.

The actions of the Geordie were very mild imo but if the other person told her to stop and she repeated the action then I'd call it harassment. If there's contradiction or doublethink in that please point it out.

ah, dodging the question and saying you've already answered it.

A once-off incident is ok, regardless of sex?
Or a once-off incident is allowable for one sex and not the other?

I strode up to "insert close female relative of yours here" who happened to be in a crouched/kneeling position and proceeded to rub my bare arse off their head - it would be fine with you if it was just that one time? She was practically asking for it shur?

This is shaping up to be a classic lads. We have all the right ingredients here.

py2006 · 19-01-2017 06:21PM

Glenster wrote: »

Just ignore it and it'll go away. Its not symptomatic of a societal failing, or a blatant double standard. People need to relax.

It may not be a huge issue but holy hell is it a HUGE double standard!!!!

Special Circumstances · 19-01-2017 06:26PM

Indeed - some of us are just fascinated by the double-think and double standards.

pilly · 19-01-2017 06:27PM

ScumLord wrote: »

And has the man in question actually said their upset about it? It's everybody else getting upset on his behalf. They see something on TV and put on their homemade judge wig and starting handing out arbitrary judgements based on zero experience and disregarding the people actually involved.

A naked woman rubbing up against someone else isn't an assault. Being naked isn't an assault, rubbing up against someone isn't an assault. Only our modern social constructs and facebook hysterics say that it is an assault.

He protested at the time, she paid no attention.

ScumLord · 19-01-2017 06:27PM

Candie wrote: »

An unwelcome naked person rubbing their bare backside on an unwilling victim is most definitely assault.

He might be able to tolerate it, he might not even mind it, but it's still assault. No mental gymnastics involved, no hysterics either.

These people aren't exactly strangers. If some naked woman jumped out from behind a hedge while I was walking down the street and started rubbing up against me I'd think there was something wrong with her. I still wouldn't really consider it an assault. As far as I'm concerned there needs to be an intent to harm. But if it was someone I knew, at worst I'd put it down to a terrible attempt at humor.

SnakePlissken wrote: »

So by your definition, should I feel compelled to whip my lad out and run it across your forehead you wouldn't consider this assault? Can you now see how preposterous your argument is?

It's completely different. Although, if we were on the same rugby team that probably would happen at some stage and it wouldn't be assault. Again if I was walking down the street and some random guy jumped out from behind a hedge and tried to rub his willy on my head it would be a different issue. I probably still wouldn't see it as an assault because that person is probably nuts or taking the piss. Not the same thing as some lad jumping out from behind a hedge and hitting me with a stick.

Accusations of sexual assault on "reality" tv show, double standards?

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