Accusations of sexual assault on "reality" tv show, double standards?

bucketybuck · 19-01-2017 12:19PM

seamus wrote: »

If you look at it, it's entirely different circumstance. He was repeatedly flashing and making aggressive unwanted sexual advances, even after the other guy had told him to stop. He didn't get kicked out for quickly opening and closing his robe for a laugh.

Did you watch the video? Because what you describe is what she did, "repeatedly flashing and making aggressive unwanted sexual advances, even after the other guy had told him to stop."

Hande hoche! · 19-01-2017 12:54PM

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

It was John or Edward. Jedward isnt a person.

Whichever one it was i'm sure being that close to a naked woman was quite upsetting to him.

In fairness to the poster, I can't tell which is which.

ohnonotgmail · 19-01-2017 12:55PM

Hande hoche! wrote: »

In fairness to the poster, I can't tell which is which.

John is the one on the left.

Hande hoche! · 19-01-2017 01:00PM

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

John is the one on the left.

Well played, you clever devil.

AudreyHepburn · 19-01-2017 01:01PM

HellSquirrel wrote: »

Agreed.

I suspect the reasons are a bit convoluted. Firstly, men tend to be physically larger than women, and even when it's not intended, such actions can appear more threatening. Emotionally and in terms of it being embarrassing, unpleasant and invasive, it's just the same. Men probably get it a bit worse in terms of feeling less able to complain about it/being told to suck it up. Complaining about it gets them little sympathy, which I don't think is right either.

People are probably more forgiving/understanding of physical threat, even the feel of physical threat, than they are of emotional distress. It's not that long since women had the same issue of the emotional distress of being touched or groped against their will dismissed as foolish hysterical women who can't take a joke. The fight arose from the physical threat of it, and the other issues surrounding it were introduced gradually. Men start off with less physical threat to make an issue of, and haven't yet had much organisation in terms of putting out a message that uninvited sexual contact is emotionally distressing to them too. Not to mention the ancient feeling that men aren't supposed to be emotional which still persists today.

In short, I don't think people are -telling- women that they can get away with this behavior so much as it's not really been raised properly and as a concerted effort to stop this sort of **** happening. Booting yer wan (who sounds like an absolute baggage) off the show would have been a start.

It goes without saying that the majority of men and women both don't do this sort of thing. Also, who the hell runs around a shared accommodation in front of cameras naked anyway?

By not reacting properly to incidents like this, or simply not caring, we are allowing women to think it's ok to act inappropriately and telling men that they should just accept it.

AudreyHepburn · 19-01-2017 01:02PM

Hande hoche! wrote: »

In fairness to the poster, I can't tell which is which.

According to the article it's John.

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 01:09PM

bucketybuck wrote: »

If a man had put his penis on a woman's head and continued to do so despite the woman making very clear that she was uncomfortable, that man would have been removed from the show and formally charged with a crime. In many first world countries those same actions would see any man placed on a sex offenders register. Anybody who tries to pretend otherwise is fooling themselves.

I'm no mens rights activist or woman hater, but the double standards in cases like these are staggering.

If she stuck her vagina in his face, you might have a point but she didn't.

I'll admit, I'm finding it terribly hard to be offended or outraged by this.

AudreyHepburn · 19-01-2017 01:16PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

If she stuck her vagina in his face, you might have a point but she didn't.

I'll admit, I'm finding it terribly hard to be offended or outraged by this.

Then there's something very wrong with how you view unwanted sexual advances.

Chloe rubbed her naked rear up against John who was clearly uncomfortable at the gesture. That, at best, is an unwanted sexual advance, at worse could be seen as sexual harassment.

I don't understand why you would find it so hard to see what's wrong with it.

If it had been the other way around John would probably end up in jail.

Stop burying your head in the sand.

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 01:29PM

AudreyHepburn wrote: »

Then there's something very wrong with how you view unwanted sexual advances.

Chloe rubbed her naked rear up against John who was clearly uncomfortable at the gesture. That, at best, is an unwanted sexual advance, at worse could be seen as sexual harassment.

I don't understand why you would find it so hard to see what's wrong with it.

If it had been the other way around John would probably end up in jail.

Stop burying your head in the sand.

I'm not burying my head in the sand, thanks. I just don't feel the need to get worked up about it and be hysterical. She should be called in by Big Brother and told to cut it out for sure and if one of the Jedwards did it I'd want the same to happen to them.

retro:electro · 19-01-2017 01:31PM

So feminists want equal rights for men and for women right? Funny how it's radio silence from them when it comes to issues like this.

red ears · 19-01-2017 01:43PM

If John or Edward slapped Chole's arse what would happen, if Chloe slapped John or Edwards arse what would happen?

Goya · 19-01-2017 01:45PM

anna080 wrote: »

So feminists want equal rights for men and for women right? Funny how it's radio silence from them when it comes to issues like this.

Aye, although men saying to get over it (as seen numerous times on this thread) doesn't help the double standards situation either.

bucketybuck · 19-01-2017 01:47PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

I'll admit, I'm finding it terribly hard to be offended or outraged by this.

Of course you aren't, because she is a woman and he is a man. That's rather the point.

kunst nugget · 19-01-2017 01:48PM

bucketybuck wrote: »

If course you aren't, because she is a woman and he us a man. That's rather the point.

I wouldn't have an issue if the roles were reversed. If a penis or vagina was brought into the mix I would…

RobertKK · 19-01-2017 01:56PM

If people want everyone to be treated equally then the standards for everyone has to be the same.
It is totally wrong for a man to sexually assault or sexually harass a woman or a man.
It should be the same for women towards men where it seems to get brushed off because 'he is a man'.
These double standards being allowed makes a mockery of women who call rightly for equality to men, but who say nothing when it is men who are the victims of inequality.
It is either equality and the same standards for all, or society is choosing to have different standards for men and for women.

19-01-2017 01:57PM

anna080 wrote: »

So feminists want equal rights for men and for women right? Funny how it's radio silence from them when it comes to issues like this.

Imagine if said incident was other way around, The Una Mullaley and Louise o Neill types would be having a major meltdown

donegal. · 19-01-2017 01:57PM

anna080 wrote: »

So feminists want equal rights for men and for women right? .

ahh no. Feminists want rights for women.

maybe you're thinking of humanists or something

retro:electro · 19-01-2017 02:05PM

donegal. wrote: »

ahh no. Feminists want rights for women.

maybe you're thinking of humanists or something

Feminists want men and women to be treated equally.

PucaMama · 19-01-2017 02:12PM

anna080 wrote: »

Feminists want men and women to be treated equally.

Feminists are for women. They are interested in women's rights. Men have their own groups. Direct your anger to those because they are just as silent as feminists on this.

19-01-2017 02:15PM

Goya wrote: »

Aye, although men saying to get over it (as seen numerous times on this thread) doesn't help the double standards situation either.

They suffer just as much from the current situation as women can when you see cases like this - or all the men yelling "what a lucky kid" when a child gets sexually assaulted by a teacher... But it's easier to tell those victims to shut up and to tell those evil feminists to shut up too

retro:electro · 19-01-2017 02:19PM

PucaMama wrote: »

Feminists are for women. They are interested in women's rights. Men have their own groups. Direct your anger to those because they are just as silent as feminists on this.

What anger!?
Feminists are for women yes, they are interested in advocating for women's rights on the grounds of equality for the sexes. What don't you get?

AudreyHepburn · 19-01-2017 02:21PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

I'm not burying my head in the sand, thanks. I just don't feel the need to get worked up about it and be hysterical. She should be called in by Big Brother and told to cut it out for sure and if one of the Jedwards did it I'd want the same to happen to them.

By attempting to appear not bothered by the double standards on show and acting like a woman randomly rubbing her naked self up against is nothing yes you are.

It's worrying that anyone would be OK with Chloe's behavior.

PucaMama · 19-01-2017 02:24PM

anna080 wrote: »

What anger!?
Feminists are for women yes, they are interested in advocating for women's rights on the grounds of equality for the sexes. What don't you get?

I don't get why people like you want feminists to look after men's issues too. Feminists are about improving women's rights not men's.

RobertKK · 19-01-2017 02:24PM

If a man says he is a feminist, it doesn't mean he wants women to have more rights than men, he wants women to have the same rights.

However that also means doing things like what Chloe did to John has to be taken the same way as if a man came out of the shower naked and started rubbing himself against a woman.
It would lead to a man being thrown off the show, and far more than a verbal warning.

It has to be a level playing field and no one should be sexually intimidated.

retro:electro · 19-01-2017 02:29PM

PucaMama wrote: »

I don't get why people like you want feminists to look after men's issues too. Feminists are about improving women's rights not men's.

It's the fact that they don't even acknowledge incidents like this is what's telling. They claim to want equal rights for men and women, but a man doesn't get away with half of the sh1t that women do.
They are well able to be vocal and blame men for the "rape culture" that has immersed our society, but acts like this get brushed under the carpet and are never addressed or given attention. That is because feminism is bullsh1t and what they really want is not equal rights, but female advancement. Scenarios like this are evidence of that.

bucketybuck · 19-01-2017 02:34PM

PucaMama wrote: »

I don't get why people like you want feminists to look after men's issues too. Feminists are about improving women's rights not men's.

I think he just wants them to acknowledge the responsibilities that come with those equal rights.

19-01-2017 02:34PM

How many people are tuned into a show like this or reading that section of the paper in fairness now

eviltwin · 19-01-2017 02:41PM

anna080 wrote: »

It's the fact that they don't even acknowledge incidents like this is what's telling. They claim to want equal rights for men and women, but a man doesn't get away with half of the sh1t that women do.
They are well able to be vocal and blame men for the "rape culture" that has immersed our society, but acts like this get brushed under the carpet and are never addressed or given attention. That is because feminism is bullsh1t and what they really want is not equal rights, but female advancement. Scenarios like this are evidence of that.

Sorry but what has this got to do with feminists?

Woman does something to a man and the tv company don't deal with it. The only person to blame here is the woman involved and whoever behind the scenes didn't act accordingly. As a woman who identifies as feminist I think any kind of unwanted sexual contact is unacceptable no matter which gender is involved.

Special Circumstances · 19-01-2017 02:43PM

Sleeper12 wrote: »

I don't see any men in the photo????

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

It was John or Edward. Jedward isnt a person.

Whichever one it was i'm sure being that close to a naked woman was quite upsetting to him.

I'm shocked* that ye aren't at least as offended/outraged by this as recent "blackface" or "Mike Pence coming to sligo" outrages.

*I'm not really though. I'd safely say this is not "on message" for the outrage brigade. Sickening double standards.

ohnonotgmail · 19-01-2017 02:50PM

Special Circumstances wrote: »

I'm shocked* that ye aren't at least as offended/outraged by this as recent "blackface" or "Mike Pence coming to sligo" outrages.

*I'm not really though. I'd safely say this is not "on message" for the outrage brigade. Sickening double standards.

WTF??? since when am i part of the outrage brigade?????

Accusations of sexual assault on "reality" tv show, double standards?

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