Age difference

LegacyUser

some advice needed please!!

met a girl the other night, a friend of a friend. Anyway, got on really well with her and like her a lot. A little birdie told me that she is interested in me. The only problem is the age difference, she is 18, I am 25. I think the difference is too much, what do you guys think?

Caffine

its upto u 2 tbh

if u 2 dont think its a problem then it isnt

PHB

divide by 2 add 7
that gives you 12.5 + 7 = 19.5

Meaning its cutting it really close like but its all personal opinion

The Corinthian

Originally posted by bloke12345
Anyway, got on really well with her and like her a lot. A little birdie told me that she is interested in me. The only problem is the age difference, she is 18, I am 25. I think the difference is too much, what do you guys think?

Actually almost the exact same thing happened to me when I was 24. Twice; first one was 6 years my junior and the second 6 years my senior. It’s an odd taboo that’s really more reminiscent of back when being 14 and having a boy/girlfriend who was two years younger/older was a big deal.

One realizes that age difference is a bigger thing when you’re younger, largely due to the vast variation that one or two years can make to someone’s maturity and character during adolescence. Once we hit somewhere between 16 and 19, that’s pretty much it on adolescence front and how we change thereafter has more to do with nurture than with nature.

Given this the greater the gap in age, the greater the chance that things won’t work out in the long run, but not due to maturity or character, but because peoples’ outlooks and expectations differ according to their age. Having said this, I once knew a chap (the younger brother of the count of Arcisate, as it happens) who had been happily married to his wife (16 years his junior) for just under 50 years.

So if you get on very well and like each other (and neither party is jailbait) then go for it, as long as you realize that there are the odds are less favourable than with someone closer to your own age.

ballooba

Originally posted by PHB
divide by 2 add 7
that gives you 12.5 + 7 = 19.5

Meaning its cutting it really close like but its all personal opinion

That's an interesting formula, where did you get it? Means its ok for me to score 17 year olds. Deadly.

Gavin

Agree with the Corinthian, if you get on with them, then age doesn't matter overly much. Having said that, it is more difficult than a relationship with someone of your own age, due to other peoples comments, possibly different goals in life etc. However, I am going out with a girl 7 years my senior for nearly 5 years now and all the hardship has been completely worth it.

Gav

smiles

em... well i guess it comes down to the idea that once you've been with them for a couple of years will you get the whole settling down buzz and will she be willing?

<< Fio >>

Calibos

Originally posted by Caffine
its upto u 2 tbh

if u 2 dont think its a problem then it isnt

What an amazing coincidence. I never heard of the 'formula' before until someone told me down the boozer last night!!

It seems it would be unacceptable for me to go out with anyone under the age of 21 and a half BTW!

PHB

I've just heard the formula before, not really sure where its come from, I kinda assumed it was general knowledge.

Its fairly accurate in its results however I dont agree with some of the ones personally. For example 18 year olds going out with 16 year olds

b3t4

My uncle is married to a woman 20yrs his junior. Happiest couple I have met. <edit> ment to say they met when she was 17</edit>
Her mother is also 20yrs her husbands junior. Another very happy couple.
My parents, dad is 10yrs younger than my mother. Not the best example but they are still together.
I went out with a guy 10yrs my senior. We broke up because he was a d1ckhead not because of the age.

If you have doubts dont bother. There is already an issue and your not even going
out with the girl. Relationships are hard enough as it is.

Best Wishes,
A.

evie

Go for it! As a wise man once said "relationships aren't for the timid".
She likes you, you like her, it's just a couple of years!

Xterminator

Hi,

My advice would be ignore the age difference, and f*ck the begrudgers!

If you take it nice and slow at the start, while making it very clear you are interested, then you cant go wrong. If you are accepted by her faimily/friends this might help, so go out of your way to bring these people onside if possible, (or at least give them no ammo).

I would point out if you were 35, and she 28 nobody would bat an eyelid at the age difference, so its not so much the age difference, but the perceived gap in maturity.

Thus I reccomend the taking tuings slowy at first, to 'display' your honourable intentions, as it were.

X

The Saint

My GF is 31 and I'm 23. I dont think it really makes a difference what the age is as ling as your intentions are the same. I sometimes find it difficult as sometimes there are clashes of intentions and sometimes I just want to go and get ****ed a behave like a complete twat which isnt really her thing (gone past it I think). I think it is easier when the guy is older than the girl though.

Typedef

Personally I have little or no respect for men who will go out with women substancially younger then them.

Example : 36 year old man, 23 year old woman.
The term sex toy springs to mind.

I don't subscribe to that crap about women being more mature, only women spout that duff, to rationalise seeing men who are much older then them, since it's frowned upon for an older woman to be with a younger man (generally), I think the same should operate for older men and younger women.
quid pro quo.

You turn that around where the woman is ten or fifteen years older then the man (below the 40 year old mark) and society at large passes it's snide remarks.

When I was sixteen I remember girls I was in class with, seeing blokes my age and older, up to 25 years old.

At the time I thought that was sad and now as a 23 year old 'I know' it's sad. There is nothing I could have in common with a girl so much younger then myself, a girl who is for all intents and purposes a child.

I just love how chicks can claim repression and demand equality on the one hand, then turn around and proclaim themselves 'so mature', 'so illucidated' in the ways of the world that only men 10,15 and 20 years older then them are their equals. Sounds like a tert and easy excuse to rationalise a sugardaddy.

The Corinthian

Originally posted by Typedef
Personally I have little or no respect for men who will go out with women substancially younger then them.

This is because? And does this stretch to women who will go out with men substantially younger then them?

I don't subscribe to that crap about women being more mature, only women spout that duff, to rationalise seeing men who are much older then them, since it's frowned upon for an older woman to be with a younger man (generally), I think the same should operate for older men and younger women.

I don’t think anyone has claimed that in this thread. Only perhaps that some people are more mature than others.

You turn that around where the woman is ten or fifteen years younger then the man (below the 40 year old mark) and society at large passes it's snide remarks.

I assume you meant to say “the woman is ten or fifteen years older”?

When I was sixteen I remember girls I was in class with, seeing blokes my age and older, up to 25 years old.

I detect bitterness and rejection.

There is nothing I could have in common with a girl so much younger then myself, a girl who is for all intents and purposes a child.

At 16, that girl is legally a child.

I just love how chicks can claim repression and demand equality on the one hand, then turn around and proclaim themselves 'so mature', 'so illucidated' in the ways of the world that only men 10,15 and 20 years older then them are their equals. Sounds like a tert and easy excuse to rationalise a sugardaddy.

What on earth is your point Typie? Feminism is hypocritical? Older men cannot be but sugar daddies to younger women?

Call me cynical, but did you fancy one of those girls in your class when you were sixteen, who rejected you for that 25-year-old guy? :rolleyes:

b3t4

Im sorry but typedef you are seriously talking BS.
Read my above post.
I find you are very flawed in your thinking and very narrow minded, IMO.

Yes I do agree with the idea that a 15yr old (child) and a 22/25 is ludicrous.
That being because those "chicks" (as you like to call us girls) are still children.
On the other hand if both parties are over 18
then there is no big deal.

Where did the "sugardaddy" comments come
from. Being in a family that has a few different
age gaps I can assure you that nobody was
looking for a "sugardaddy" or toyboy as you
appear to be suggesting. I found your comments very generalised.

No matter what age people are they can be
happy together. I have never seen a happier
or more in love couple than my uncle and his
wife. As I said the age gap between my parents
did not go as smoothly but then they
are too different people.

Each to their own,
A.

patch

I did the same thing-She was 19, I was 26. It bothered me at first too..... it seemed an awful big step down in years for me. You get used to it though!!

Of course it turned out she was a darned sight less mature than I first thought, and it didn't last........I'd say just go with your gut feeling on this one, give it a try and see how it pans out!!:)

Typedef

Originally posted by The Corinthian


I detect bitterness and rejection.

Not so. I could understand that the girl was caught up in a man, who seemed interested and was so much older, had a car etc,etc, but one has to wonder what sort of mental level that guy was at to be with a girl so much younger, as has been pointed out 16 to 25 is much more difference then say 45 to 54.

Call me cynical, but did you fancy one of those girls in your class when you were sixteen, who rejected you for that 25-year-old guy?

Actually I had little to no time for her, since it was obvious that she was so damn egocentric that she thought the only men fit for her were 25 year olds, I mean lets be serious, you're sitting your Junior Cert in a school with 1000+ students, but you come out with comments like "I'll only go out with mature men, say like 21" (where 6th years are just not enough of a status symbol), the term victim springs to mind. Nah, I fancied her friend (my girlfriend for 1 1/2 years). Like I say, girlies like our 16 year old friend, have been the sort I have always silently laughed at for being so blatantly up their own arses.

Yes I do agree with the idea that a 15yr old (child) and a 22/25 is ludicrous.
That being because those "chicks" (as you like to call us girls) are still children.
On the other hand if both parties are over 18
then there is no big deal.

It's not illegal, I do think it's a little sad though, I know chicks who date older men 'accidentally/generally' and personally, whilst it might boost the girls ego to think herself on a level with someone so much older (say 15 years for the sake of argument) (below the 47 year old tide mark) I think that if you reverse the roles, the man would be labeled a toy-boy and perhaps rightly so.
So in these times of equality, why is the younger woman with the older man not labeled in a similar fashion.... because (cough) women are 'so mature'?
In that case what does feminism mean except an excuse to dispel the bad stuff of chauvanism and keep the good stuff... like opening doors, paying for meals etc, etc, etc.

It's sort of difficult to have your cake and eat it.... or words to that effect.

Shinji

I wouldn't worry that much about an age difference like that - as long as you're comfortable with the relationship, in that you don't feel like you're leading on or exploiting the other party.

If you're interested in each other and attracted to each other, what the hell difference does a few years make? As long as you're not talking about jailbait, age doesn't matter a damn, it really doesn't - it's other factors in the dynamic of the relationship which are SOMETIMES influenced by age that you want to watch out for.

(I guess a question worth asking is, would you be comfortable with having a really good friend that much younger/older than you? For my part, that's a non-issue, which I suppose affects my beliefs in this regard - I'm 22, my two best friends are 16 and 31. I guess to some people that would look a bit weird, and the same people would probably cluck about relationships between people of different age groups...)

NeMiSiS

She was 30 ! I was 15,I was in no uncertain terms her plaything ! Then one day I woke up and thought 'man when she was 16 I was 1..when she was 18 I was like 4!" So I sorted myself out wiyth a 19 year old insted..

Enough of my manwhoring stories :P

Do it. Why the **** not ?

NeM

The Corinthian

Originally posted by Typedef
Not so. I could understand that the girl was caught up in a man, who seemed interested and was so much older, had a car etc,etc, but one has to wonder what sort of mental level that guy was at to be with a girl so much younger, as has been pointed out 16 to 25 is much more difference then say 45 to 54.

For a start it’s illegal. Second or all, even if it were not so, it would be inadvisable to conduct a relationship with someone who is still physically and biologically developing.

Also, I don’t think anyone has argued for a relationship with an adolescent. However, as I have already argued, once you’ve gotten over adolescence, then the process maturation (for lack of a better term) comes down to character and experience. There are plenty of immature 25 and 45-year-olds out there after all, and the reverse it also true.

One thing that you have not yet realized, is that the “mental level that guy” is exactly the same as when he ended adolescence - We don’t change after that point, we refine.

Same with you, Typie - You’re probably much the same person as you were when you were 17, only with a few more experiences.

But then what about that same 45-year-old you suggested with a 70-year-old? Should we accuse the 45-year-old of being immature? As for the 70-year-old’s state of health, there are quite a few at that age who are very healthy and active.

And finally your argument has concentrated on younger women with older men (then accusing Society of double standards), ignoring the fact that all the responses were impartial and equally cited the younger men with older women scenario.

Your reasoning appears to be based upon a prejudice rather than logic.

Like I say, girlies like our 16 year old friend, have been the sort I have always silently laughed at for being so blatantly up their own arses.

Trust me - most of them never change. Regardless of age.

thedrowner

i went out with someone 5 years older than me once but the age difference was a problem, b/c the guy himself was looking to settle down and i wasnt. partly to do with the age gap and partly to do with the kind of guy he was.

but if you've none of those kind of problems, then why worry.

i do get a bit queezy when girls go out with guys younger than them, in particular when theyre in their teens. its just a personal thing though.

Samara

Age is just a number as they say, it's only an issue if it bothers you personally, what other people think is their problem. My b/f is six years my senior and we've been together almost seven years. If as Typedef suggests the older man only goes with the younger woman to use her as a sex toy, then I think we would both have moved on long ago.

I was just a few days after my 18th b'day when I met my b/f and he was 24. Age isn't a factor for me, I go for guys I find attractive, funny and witty - end of story and I reckon that's the way it should be for everyone.

It seems, however, to be only you that's bothered about the age. Why is it such an issue to you?? You seem to be very aware that many other couples with age gaps are quite happy but you're still reluctant. I think you need to figure it out for yourself, if you're not going to be comfortable with the age gap it will only cause friction and resentment. Maybe you need to get to know her a bit better before anything develops to avoid this.

Typedef

Originally posted by Samara

It seems, however, to be only you that's bothered about the age. Why is it such an issue to you?? You seem to be very aware that many other couples with age gaps are quite happy but you're still reluctant.

There's no need to be defensive chicken-licken.

My mother was five years older then my father. One of my Grandmothers was fourteen years older then my Grandfather [1]. It's just sometimes I come across women who went out with men in their thirties when said girls were 18-19. Now while that is 'legal', it has to be said that, that guy was just immature. I was officially the 'youngest' man she had been with (one year younger then her) and I wasn't sure whether to be flattered by that or feel sorry for her for that.

18 and 24 is not big thing, I probably wouldn't go for an eighteen year old girl (I'm 23 incidentally) and I'd probably put a bit of a stop gap at 19 (at least) on that front, because I've seen lots of girls go after men because those guys were older and a status symbol for those girls to their friends and "I" Typedef won't get used like that.

[1] Then again he did spend 5 years fighting in ww2 in North Africa, so I suppose that could have the effect of making a person..... war weary for want of a better world[2]
[2] All is fair in love and war.

The Corinthian

Originally posted by Typedef
because I've seen lots of girls go after men because those guys were older and a status symbol for those girls to their friends and "I" Typedef won't get used like that.

So your objection is against younger women going after older men on a basis of the men being exploited..?

Priceless - you just can't make up **** like that

Samara

Sheesh Typedef, it's almost coming across that you think all girls under say 18 are shallow and are only interested in a guys money and cars so they can get one up on their friends?? Say it ain't so!!! Bitter, bitter, bitter..............................:p

The Saint

Sheesh Typedef, it's almost coming across that you think all girls under say 18 are shallow and are only interested in a guys money and cars so they can get one up on their friends?? Say it ain't so!!! Bitter, bitter, bitter..............................

Yeah, you should know that they are still like this after they turn 18.

Typedef

Ok I'll just say it.

Mostly I like to go out with women who are oh about two years older then me...... because I feel chicks have to be that bit older..... and more mature to be with me.

mmmm don't you just love it?

The Saint

You just like being a toyboy and being told what to do (bend over, put that snooker ball back in your mouth, ect.)

Kell

I always find it interesting the fact that so many people consider the long term of a relationship rather than just getting on with having fun. FFS, why should our original poster be concerned as to whether this lass will want to settle down when he wants to or whether people think he is using her as a sex doll?

If I were he, I would just take it a day at a time. If it works out, whaay hey if it doesnt, fúck it, theres another one round the corner prolly only too happy to take her place.

K-

Victor

I've been interested in women anything from 4 years older than me to 11 years younger (phew, she turned 18 before I tried anything!). I think when you are in your teens it is important to be wary of age differences, in your twenties you are overly paranoid about it and in your thirties you are desparate enough to just make sure she's legal.

xx

Hmmm, dodgy one this, but I think this guy has his mind made up anyway, no matter whats said here. When I was 21, I was with a 29 year old girl for about 4 months. We were really good friends. Then just two months ago (I'm 25 now), I was with a 32 year old. Its quite subjective really. But one things for sure - do NOT expect guaranteed maturity with a 16-17 year old girl. One of my mates who is 24 is seeing a 17 year old girl, and she is the epitome of dizzy.

Gordon

Guaranteed maturity? Surely the fact that the law states that one is not mature enough under 17 would cement that "maturity".

/me waves the stick of "the law" around a bit*



*with a large trout also.

CuLT

I really don't think this is a *legal* issue, but more of a moral one. Personally, I feel that its just not right.

I would feel ashamed of myself if I were to go out with someone 2-3 years my junior. Granted, I am 18 now, but I still believe I will hold myself to this moral guidline until I reach my mid twenties, at which point I dont believe a gap of 2-3 years will be relevant any longer.

The point is, at 18 most people are hitting the Leaving Cert, at 23 you're nearly out of college, if not already. There is a VAST quantity of experiences that a person will undergo to develop them in the adult world between 18 and 23.
Esentially, someone in their early to mid twenties is picking off girls fresh from secondary school; and lets face it, theres one hell of a difference between college girls and schoolgirls.

And, (I'm really going to piss some people off with this) I believe that if you have to aim that low age-wise that it is a sign of weakness and inability to connect with individuals of the opposite sex in your own age bracket (for the purposes of something more than a platonic relationship).

Typedef

Originally posted by xx
One of my mates who is 24 is seeing a 17 year old girl, and she is the epitome of dizzy.

Case and point mate.

Of course a girl who is seven years younger and under 30ish is going to appear dizzy to a lad's mates, the girl is seven years younger... hello..... Men basically desire sex with younger women and if one of the prices for that is allowing said chick to believe herself so 'mature and advanced' despite her years, what does the man who's primary motive is sex with a young woman care?

Typedef : Hides from all the chicks who have seen/are seeing older men,

Victor

Originally posted by CuLT
I really don't think this is a *legal* issue, but more of a moral one. Personally, I feel that its just not right.

It is [edit] only [/edit] a legal problem if one party is under 17 and having sex.

CuLT

Originally posted by Victor
It is a legal problem if one party is under 17 and having sex.

I direct you to the first post. 18 and 23.

Caesar_Bojangle

according to this great formula i can do my younger sisters friend with the massive bongos.

I'm 18 so with the formula in practice, i can do 16 year olds, luckily to avoid any legal complications she turns 17 in 3 weeks.

The Corinthian

Originally posted by CuLT
I would feel ashamed of myself if I were to go out with someone 2-3 years my junior. Granted, I am 18 now, but I still believe I will hold myself to this moral guidline until I reach my mid twenties, at which point I dont believe a gap of 2-3 years will be relevant any longer.

I can understand having problems with going out with someone 2-3 years your junior, if you’re 18 - It’s illegal, for a start. I think it’s a little nonsensical for you to argue on the subject of your being with younger women given your age. How would you feel about someone 2-3 years your senior?

Originally posted by Typedef
Men basically desire sex with younger women and if one of the prices for that is allowing said chick to believe herself so 'mature and advanced' despite her years, what does the man who's primary motive is sex with a young woman care?

Regardless of age, people seek out sex, or companionship or commitment of financial reward or whatever from their partners. Sometimes it’s an honest equal relationship sometimes it’s not. A man can lie to a woman born on the same day as himself as easily as he can to one born twenty years earlier.

Had you considered the possibility that a young woman might go after an older man for the sex, rather (or as well as) visa versa? Certainly, when I was a lot younger, that’s why I would chase after older women...

Samara

How did this turn into a legal question?? Both parties are over 18!!!

Now feel free to correct me if I'm wrong (Which you will and which I'm not ) but there seems to be a general consensus between a couple of guys that the guy only wants this girl for sex!! Assuming you're right, which you may not be, what makes you think she's not after the same thing?? She's a big girl, maybe she just wants a bit of fun!! I don't know anybody who goes out seeking relationships, it always starts off as a bit of fun and either develops or dies from there!

ToxicPaddy

I have to agree with Samara there...

Anytime ive been single in the past when I end up with someone its for one reason and one reason only, to have some fun... if something develops from it then so be it...

Bont be worrying about the girls intentions or future plans or anything like that until you get to know her.. ya mightened even like her after a few nights out...

Jeez guys Im 28 and very mature for my age, or so Ive been told... yet there are guys a lot younger than me who are a bit too mature for their years.. kick back and live a little, you'll have enough worries in later life so dont add needless worries to your life now..

The Corinthian

Originally posted by Samara
How did this turn into a legal question?? Both parties are over 18!!!

CuLT argued that he woyld never go out with someone 2-3 years his junior. Given he's 18 I would be glad to hear it, were I his barrister.

there seems to be a general consensus between a couple of guys that the guy only wants this girl for sex!!

Typedef is dragging me down to his level :rolleyes:

DeadBankClerk

Originally posted by Victor
(phew, she turned 18 before I tried anything!).

Even if she was 18, think of the emotional trauma that you have caused her.

:shudder:

CuLT

Corthinian, you have quite a dry wit :rolleyes: , its refreshing . On the point of 2 years my senior, I most likely would give it a shot, but I would have to reckon she should get her priorities straight.

I believe the owness is on the older party to make the judgement call. It may seem a bit of a cop out on the part of the younger, but really, the older should be more responsible.

The Corinthian

Originally posted by CuLT
On the point of 2 years my senior, I most likely would give it a shot, but I would have to reckon she should get her priorities straight.

My point was that you couldn’t really make the same comparison for having a relationship with someone younger yourself, because you’re on the young end of the scale yourself. Reverse the roles, and it’s interesting to note that you’re open to the idea.

I believe the owness is on the older party to make the judgement call. It may seem a bit of a cop out on the part of the younger, but really, the older should be more responsible.

Indeed - a complete cop out. If you can vote, fight for your country, go to prison, marry and start a family at eighteen, should you be absolved of responsibility for your actions in relationships based upon age? As I’ve said repeatedly, once you get over adolescence you don’t as much change as refine with experience. Who you are at 18 will be essentially who you will be at 28 and 58 (although you’ll most likely mellow with age and physically begin to fall apart ).

Typedef’s views, on the other hand, are based upon his own personal preference in older women and distrust for women his own age or younger. Using classic egocentric logic, he expands this view to become a moral or ethical viewpoint rather than the preference, prejudice or fetish that it actually is.

Personally, I’m bi-chronological

CuLT

Originally posted by The Corinthian

Indeed - a complete cop out. If you can vote, fight for your country, go to prison, marry and start a family at eighteen, should you be absolved of responsibility for your actions in relationships based upon age?

Do the majority of 18 year olds have the mental maturity to fight for their country, or start a family? I think not. How then could they be expected to make rational judgements in terms of a relationship with soemone several years their senior? I certainly don't believe I can make that decision rationally.
For want of a better phrase, men are guided by their penis up to the late 20s, after this, the mind tends gets one over on it.
Women strenuosly deny that they are guided by their sexual desires and I would tend to believe them as the Discovery Channel backs up that opinion .

As I’ve said repeatedly, once you get over adolescence you don’t as much change as refine with experience. Who you are at 18 will be essentially who you will be at 28 and 58 (although you’ll most likely mellow with age and physically begin to fall apart ).

I'm sure quite a bit of "refining" takes place during that 5 year gap between 18 and 23. Like a fine wine, sure it's basically the same stuff as was in the bottle 5 years before, but you can tell the difference between it and its younger counterpart.

Kell

Originally posted by CuLT
Do the majority of 18 year olds have the mental maturity to fight for their country, or start a family? I think not.

Largely irrelevent. The fact of the matter is that they can legally do so of their own accord. I think Corinthians point was that if said 18 year old is legally able to fight, vote and start a family then she is theoretically accountable for her choices of relationship.

K-

Scruff

As the saying goes "Yer only as young as the girl \bloke ye feel"

So if yer comfortable with it go for it.
If it turns out she's not as mature as you'd like ye'll know ye just didnt want to be an 18 year old any more.

CuLT

Originally posted by Kell
Largely irrelevent. The fact of the matter is that they can legally do so of their own accord. I think Corinthians point was that if said 18 year old is legally able to fight, vote and start a family then she is theoretically accountable for her choices of relationship.

K-

Do I really need to repeat myself? IT'S A MORAL ISSUE. Law is created by men and thus is flawed. It is made to benefit whatever the opinions of people are at the time. Morality is an inherent trait, one finds it difficult to go against their own morals, laws however, are easy to break.

To draw a ludicrously overexaggerated model for you, Any normal person would feel paedophaelia is immoral as well as illegal, however, the same person might have absolutely no mark on their conscience for obtaining warez though that too is illegal. This is the essential difference in morality and legality.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

erm, moral is a societal thing..not inherant ly human at all. years ago it was considered proper for a girl to be married by 15/16 and to be raising a child or two.. now it ain't

morals have changed as our society has evolved.. *shrug*

The Corinthian

Originally posted by CuLT
Do I really need to repeat myself? IT'S A MORAL ISSUE. Law is created by men and thus is flawed. It is made to benefit whatever the opinions of people are at the time. Morality is an inherent trait, one finds it difficult to go against their own morals, laws however, are easy to break.

Actually, unless you want to start arguing that God™ gave us morality, you would have to accept that it too is a human creation. Morality is no actually inherent, but learned, normally during the formative years - I mean did you think that the interest expressed by religious organizations in running schools was purely to improve their love lives?

If morality were so inherent, why would it often differ so much from culture to culture? Why would suicide be moral in one society and immoral in another? And as Mordeth pointed out, Society’s views on maturity change too.

To draw a ludicrously overexaggerated model for you, Any normal person would feel paedophaelia is immoral as well as illegal, however, the same person might have absolutely no mark on their conscience for obtaining warez though that too is illegal. This is the essential difference in morality and legality.

I see where you’re getting at, but it’s a false parallel. Downloading warez is essentially theft. Software is created through the labour of programmers and the capitalists who risk often everything to get a product to market. And theft is immoral. However, it’s an easy immorality to overlook as it appears to be a victimless one as the perpetrator has a comfortable distance from those he/she steals from.

I have no doubt that to you an older male with a younger female feels wrong, but that’s hardly proof that it is. Young Abdul in a camp on the West Bank may feel that the US is the great Satan, but that doesn’t make that correct either. It just means that’s how he was brought up, as you were.

However, it does point out that indeed it would more often than not, be inadvisable to conduct a relationship with someone who is too young for you, if only because if they have such idiotic notions of the World (and not all do), they’re likely to drive you to murder before long...