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Hmmmm anybody in the mood to start a new Religion?

Lord Khan · 2002-02-07 00:05:06

Just bored ... thought get a few people and start a new religon? anybody interested? ... need god(s),commandment and stuff like that and some sorta holy book.

07-02-2002 12:05am

#1

Lord Khan

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Just bored ... thought get a few people and start a new religon?

anybody interested? ...

need god(s),commandment and stuff like that and some sorta holy book.

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#2 07-02-2002 12:20am

phaxx

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Hrm I dunno. Geekonia? Lots of bandwidth, pizza and beards. Fagball, eggchasing and other crap sports banned. Sporty gits burnt at the stake, the fires ignited by an overclocked athlon with the heatsink removed.

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#3 07-02-2002 12:46am

MarcusGarvey

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go away Scientologist

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#4 07-02-2002 12:57am

Goodshape

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Originally posted by Lord Khan
need god(s),commandment and stuff like that and some sorta holy book.

hey, sounds like fun. I could do with being a God for a while...

I can be all... DO MY BIDDING!!... and, stuff... hehe..

I dont think anyone will listen though.

what about the Holy Church of Homer? if anyone deserves a bit of devine worship its thats guy.

Originally by Homer Simpson
Homer: Mr. Scorpio says productivity is up 2%, and it's all because of my motivational techniques, like donuts and the possibility of more donuts to come.

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#5 07-02-2002 1:35am

Karl Hungus

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Yes... The Church of Homer.

Life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

ALL HAIL HOMER!

HAIL!
HAIL!
HAIL!

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#6 07-02-2002 8:08am

Clinical Waste

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............and Hallowed be thy name

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#7 07-02-2002 9:15am

Beruthiel

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aaamen *sang in a churchie type way*

I would like to be the godess of herbs and health

I shall administer to the flock as your bidding allows oh master

your humble servent
Beruthiel

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#8 07-02-2002 9:20am

schrodinger

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I can be the god of fertility. All women must make a sacrafice to me or they cannot bare children.

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#9 07-02-2002 9:34am

Murdock

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Catholic Church is fighting back already!

I was told this morning that for the "month of lent" or what ever you call it you will recieve bible stories in text messages.

WIERD

But at the same time, what a rapid response!

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#10 07-02-2002 9:57am

Puck

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I'm already a Universal Life Church Minister so I could perform the first Church of Homer wedding if ye like.

Rev. Puck

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#11 07-02-2002 10:05am

Saruman

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Do we get Days off work for Religions holidays?
If so im in.. Dont believe in God but i do believe in days off work!

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#12 07-02-2002 10:11am

SheroN

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I wish to be the god of war....can i LK huh huh huh?...

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#13 07-02-2002 10:21am

azezil

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been there, done that

Church of the Ethernal Azezilites bringing you good family values since 2001

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#14 07-02-2002 10:25am

schrodinger

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Can we wear big black cloaks?

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#15 07-02-2002 10:27am

Lord Khan

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all good

I'm God of war and Fertility anyway .. those things seem to go together anyway

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#16 07-02-2002 10:48am

Puck

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I call god of Love/Lovers! It's mine! That way we can have a Puck's Day instead of this Valentine crap!

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#17 07-02-2002 10:49am

roar_ie

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and the women buy lads the gifts - oh please say it is so!!!!

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#18 07-02-2002 10:53am

Lord Khan

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hmmm woman buying gifts ... hmmm don't think they'd like they ... they generally like recieving gifts.

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#19 07-02-2002 10:55am

azezil

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Can I be the bringer of plagues, death and destruction?

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#20 07-02-2002 10:56am

Lord Khan

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Ok ... bringger of plagues and deaths ... so you want to work in a fast food take away then

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#21 07-02-2002 11:00am

azezil

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Just call me Mr. McD!

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#22 07-02-2002 11:04am

roar_ie

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God of General Mayhem and Annoyance!

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#23 07-02-2002 11:05am

Lord Khan

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done

still now who wants to write about 5000+ pages of rubbish that we will call our holy book ... our will we just adopt the menu from burger king?

Just getting my black cloak now

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#24 07-02-2002 11:08am

Saruman

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I can be death of nations

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#25 07-02-2002 11:23am

schrodinger

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Yeah we have to the four horsemen of the apocalypse

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#26 07-02-2002 11:27am

Puck

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Can't Boards just be the "holy book". There's enough nonsense here anyway.:D

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#27 07-02-2002 11:28am

azezil

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ah yeah well spoted schrodinger!

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#28 07-02-2002 12:06pm

Lord Khan

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Originally posted by schrodinger
Yeah we have to the four horsemen of the apocalypse

But would four be enough ...

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#29 07-02-2002 12:07pm

schrodinger

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Well we would have to be unique so I think the Twelve Hoursemen of the Apocalypse has a nice ring to it.

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#30 07-02-2002 12:21pm

Lord Khan

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True ... let them hunt down witchs and those really crap pop stars.

Temples ... lots of small ones or ... go for a few REALLY big ones...

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#31 07-02-2002 12:24pm

schrodinger

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Can we take what women we want???? Cause I want that Shakira chick!

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#32 07-02-2002 12:30pm

Clinical Waste

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Originally posted by azezil
been there, done that
Church of the Ethernal Azezilites bringing you good family values since 2001

(Life of Brian rip-off script)

CW:Can I join your group?

A:Nah F*ck off

CW:But I really want to? I hate the Holy Church of Homer as much as anyone.

A:Oh yeah, How Much?

CW:A lot.

A:Right...........

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#33 07-02-2002 12:37pm

WhiteWashMan

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can i be the god of cumshots?

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#34 07-02-2002 12:39pm

schrodinger

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We would have to invent a drink of the Gods.

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#35 07-02-2002 12:39pm

azezil

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I'll give that an 'ewwww factor' 7.5 on the aul AzeziL ewww factor-o-metre

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#36 07-02-2002 12:43pm

schrodinger

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I have an idea for a drink. How about a cocktail of Poitin and Absinth?

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#37 07-02-2002 1:42pm

pat kenny

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God created the world in 6 days ,And on the seventh day God logged onto the net and searched for porn for he hadn't had a w@nk in 6days.
Sunday will now be renamed w@nking day.

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#38 07-02-2002 1:42pm

Lord Khan

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Originally posted by WhiteWashMan
can i be the god of cumshots?

... don't think anybody will challange you for that one there wwm

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#39 07-02-2002 1:47pm

schrodinger

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I think big banquets would be in order. With B"@ches everywhere and lots of drink and a huge long table covered with meat and booze.

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#40 07-02-2002 4:55pm

Lord Khan

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hmmm just need a name for this religon?
but so far looks like we have the basics need for a religion

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#41 07-02-2002 5:26pm

Panda

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Religion is dead, long live religion!!!

All shall bow down and hail Lord Khan!!! now!

Can i be the GOD OF SARCASM ?

I suggest that we call it Pandism, eh? u roar???
BECAUSE I SAID SO!!!
and it sounds great.....

Oh and Screw loaves and fishes:
The Food of the Gods

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#42 07-02-2002 6:42pm

Karl Hungus

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I am the god of all beer and music!

All shall fall drunken before me.

We shall then lay on our backs attempting to stand up and headbang.

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#43 07-02-2002 6:45pm

azezil

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Just a quick flick to the "food of the gods" have to say a tayto sandwitch is nothing without Ham and Cheese. yum yum

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#44 07-02-2002 7:48pm

amp

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I'd just like to say at this point that I don't believe in any of you.

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#45 07-02-2002 8:23pm

SheroN

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kneel before yuor god(s)!

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#46 07-02-2002 8:32pm

Lord Khan

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Amp if you don't believe in us... that means you are talking to your self back there.

Hail! Hail! Hail!

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#47 08-02-2002 8:15am

Clinical Waste

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Originally posted by amp
I'd just like to say at this point that I don't believe in any of you.

If you're not with us, you are against us....KILL HIM!

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#48 08-02-2002 9:16am

amp

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Originally posted by Lord Khan
Amp if you don't believe in us... that means you are talking to your self back there.

No better person to speak to, you imaginary apparation you.

Hail! Hail! Hail!

Ah, too kind.

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#49 08-02-2002 9:59am

Beruthiel

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messing up peoples hair

leave my hair out of it - I paid 26 euros on it last Saturday

so sayeth
Beruthiel - godess of herbs etc...

is it time for the gods to fight among themselves?

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#50 08-02-2002 11:14am

Lord Khan

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God won't fight among each other ... This religion has security

respect my autoritaaaaah!

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#51 08-02-2002 11:21am

Beruthiel

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respect my autoritaaaaah!

that's all well and good my lord - but isn't it time you started laying down some ground rules just to keep some sort of order?

yours respectfully
Beruthiel
godess of herbs 'n' stuff

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