Suicide And Breakup.

LegacyUser

Myself and my Gf broke up after a long term Relationship ment to go on holidays in two weeks. I have suffered for depressed for a few years but i have been fine since her, But out of no apparent reason she ended it today. And all i want to do is leave everything behind, i've lost alot of friends by getting with her. And i am considering Suicide I have a box of Tablets ready for me to take before i sleep, I no its selfish but i cant go on.

Victor

A bit melodramatic don't you think?

I made a rule for myself a few years ago when I felt really down (a friend died, I was in an accident, I quit my job, I suffered severe depression, my new boss and my flat mate were exploiting me financially and then my niece died).

I decided that I'm not going to give in to the people that hurt me. Committing suicide would, for me, be letting them win. I'm not going to let "them" win. Can you consider the same?

I'd like you to talk to someone, preferably your GP, explain how you feel and something can be done to help you.

You can also talk to the Samaritans, they are there to listen. Call them on 1850 60 90 90 or jo@samaritans.org

Dagon

"A bit melodramatic don't you think?"

Please, coments like that don't help if someone is in deep suffering.

HelpAsap, there is a lot to live for. Notice I don't say "you" have a lot to live for, but "there is", meaning that it is all out there for you to find. But you have to work on yourself before you can see this. Right now, it seems there is nothing to live for. But this is an illusion, and you will see why after you come out of it (and you will come out of it, have faith in yourself). When I look back on the times I felt suicidal, I look back on myself as a blind, numb, closed human, who was connected up to a lot of dark thoughts and forces in my life.

When you learn how to unlock your inner healing powers, and connect yourself to the light, you can have an amazing journey! Anyone can do this. Your suicidal feelings are actually a great thing - they will bring about a rebirth for you, a new life, a new start. For different people, the new journey starts in different ways.. for me it started with a Chopra book called "The Seven Spiritual Laws"...

It's up to you now. I never believed those who said "life can be exactly what you want, and you can have everything you ever want right here"... until I experienced it for myself.

Experience it for yourself, then come back and tell me it's true! Don't believe what I've said just yet, experience it first!

eskimo

Victor wrote:

A bit melodramatic don't you think?

That is very nasty of you.

We all deal with things differently and you are in no position to tell someone that what they are feeling is not the right thing to feel. You could make them feel much worse. Think before you speak.

jesus_thats_gre

WTF? Victor is right in his attitude... Contemplating suicide because a GF broke up with you just is not right.. It is an over reaction and he is right to say so..


To the OP. What has been said so far is bang on. You will go on to find plenty of reasons to live as you grow older to the extent where you will probably be able to look back on these dark days and be mystified as how you actually considered such drastic action over the ending of a relationship.

Ps: Drago, are you pimping something a little space cadety?

eskimo

jesus_thats_gre wrote:

WTF? Victor is right in his attitude... Contemplating suicide because a GF broke up with you just is not right.. It is an over reaction and he is right to say so..

Oh would you come on! The dude is clearly not suicidal solely because his girlfriend broke up with him. Use your brain!!

He was feeling depressed before he met her.

And belittling his feelings is not helping!!

jesus_thats_gre

I am belittling his feelings with the purpose of making him feel bad about feeling the way he does.. But wrapping him in a big blanket of hippy love and telling him feeling depressed to the extent whereby he feels suicidal is is "ok" is not any help either..

Depressions is an illness.. Depression can be cured... Suicide is not the cure...

Finally, I imagine your ex knows that you once suffered from depression.. Commiting suicide would probably send her life into a bit of a downward spiral caused by guilt.. She would blame herself forever..

WhiteWashMan

people, cool it. we are allowed to post as we see fit if its within the charter. just becuase you dont apprecaite someone elses point of view, or their methid, does not means its wrong.

if you want to wrap someone up in a big ball of cooton wool, then you go right ahead. personally, i believe that people should have at least one foot planted firmly in the land of realism, and im with victor on this one.

the poster is obviously upset, in a state of shock over the break up, and is being melodramatic. its his way of getting some emotional block out and try and get how he feels across. i dont think he is going to commit suicide, i just dont think he has thought enough about it to be able to explain what his feelings really are. apart from ' i feel like crap'

well, you get dumped, you feel like crap. we all get it/got it at some stage.
welcome to life.

take the tablets if you have a headache. try and stick to just the 2. stop being overmeotional and sit back and think about what has happened. youll be fine.

Beruthiel

Helpasap wrote:

I have suffered for depressed for a few years but i have been fine since her

so you are saying that you did not suffer from depression while with her?
if that is the case, then it is time to learn how to stand on your own two feet and teach yourself how to be happy without a g/f. Become independent, only when you are independent can you have a proper relationship with another person. Take this time to work on yourself, 'me' time if you will.

i've lost alot of friends by getting with her

another thing you have learned, never, ever drop your friends because of a g/f. Call them, I bet they will be happy to hear from you. Go out and have some fun.
It's true what they say you know, time does heal everything

DawnMc

Suicide is the most selfish way out. I work with people who attempt suicide on a daily basis.
You are not thinking about those who you'll be leaving behind. Your GF is just one girl, there'll be many more. You will get over her eventually. Think about your family/friends.
Hell, if you love your ex, think about how bad she'd feel if you killed yourself?
Think about the person who'll find you

AllMessedUp

been there mate. Felt exactly the same, it only happened reasonly aswell. Just fight it. Its been nearly 3 weeks and Im doin alright. you go from disbelief, to depression, to anger, to disbelief again and every day the circle continues but it gets easier and less painful.

LegacyUser

I no its a selfish way out but for about 4 years now i am been depressed, I have taken one step and talked to the Samaritans, I tried it Last nite I took 12 Paracetimol But woke up and felt no different.

WhiteWashMan

you wont get the help you need here.
you need to talk to a professional.

i would suggest you either go to your local GP, who can refer you to someone, or just jump on the phone to the samaratins again.

but whatever your problems are, you wont find the answer here.

LegacyUser

I know WWM dont actually think i was looking for advise more so Just talk let it out ya know. Thanks For everyone INput.

BEAT

He is right, you wont find the answers here but you will find people who are willing to listen. If there is something you feel you cant say to the samaritans then please do say it here.
We will listen and offer what advice we can, but know that Suicide really isnt the answer...as they said above you have a lot to live for you cant base your life on 1 relationship.

please do call the samaritans again or anyone you feel you can talk to,
sometimes just talking it out can be very helpful.

I do hope you can see your way through this and realise that you wont always feel like this, there is help if you give it a chance.

Victor

Victor wrote:

A bit melodramatic don't you think?

OK, in the cold light of day, I'll change that to "A bit dramatic don't you think?", but my basic point stands.

OP, I hope you are feeling a little better. Realise that you wil hurt for a while.

I was talking to a taxi driver today, his marriage is breaking up after 25 years, at least the kids are in their teenage years and while a big lad, he still sounded very fragile.

---

I've no idea who you are, but feel sure that we on boards still love you (hippy, lovey bit over ), probably in a very different way, but we do. Please come out with us some night.

eskimo

To second what everyone has said, don't commit suicide. Seriously man - it'd be such a waste because you can and will have an enjoyable life in the future. I know you feel like absolute sh*t right now, but just get yourself through this. It will be completely worth it. And think about your family - committing suicide would cause them so much pain. Not just your family, but your friends. And it would frighten your community too. Keep all this in mind when trying to decide what to do.

Find whatever amount, even if it's only a tiny amount, of strength that is inside you to keep yourself going. Allow yourself to feel the pain, the anger, the depression... don't try to fight it because this will wear you out and leave you running for the easiest way out. You are allowed to feel this way.

Go to see a doctor who you trust - your family GP preferably. If you're in college, you should have a college counsellor who's services are free of charge. Go to a depression group and talk to other people who are going through the same, or just listen to their stories - especially the stories of how they overcame their problem. All of this will give you strength; it sounds like you really need some right now.

It seems very clear, and deep down you know this yourself, that the depression has not been triggered by your girlfriend leaving you. Being with her only pushed the depression a little further to the back of your mind. It didn't make it go away. And to be honest man, it's probably better that she left you because you have a big problem now to deal with that you have been pushing aside for quite a long time - one you chose to ignore while you were going out with this girl. At least now you feel compelled to take action to combat the problem.

Suicide is not appropriate action, not at all. Consider the ideas I have suggested. And if you can't do any of that, then swallow your pride and forget your shame or embarrassment and talk to your family about this. Whoever in the family you feel closest to. Or even a best friend. Life isn't all happy-go-lucky and rainbows, so don't feel that you can't talk to them because you'd be bringing them down with you. You won't be destroying any unrealistic notion they had that this would never happen to someone they love. Everyone is aware that people get depressed and suicidal. Okay, at first they might be shocked and surprised that it has happened to someone they are close to, but they will accept it and then help you to the best of their ability because they love you - so let them love you, you deserve it. And you need it.

Suicide is out of the question, okay? There are a thousand other ways out.

LegacyUser

I just give so much for people, do so much i put everything into the relationship aswell. I felt it was time to be selfish for a change. Last night was the First time ever i actually acted on my thoughts inside my head. But i was talkin to a Friend through all of it and met up with her got my feelings out. Esk is right What happened just pushed my depression forward. The Last time something like this happened(I was with the same girl 2 years ago which triggered the came thing) i was around my friends which took my mind off things but i dont have that this time. I took steps today and texted all my friends they all replied and got invited down to one of them and it cheered me up big time. I tried to go to the doctor today but he couldnt see me as my mother rang cause she thinks i just want a sick letter, but i will have a chat with him about it. Thanks everyone for the advice, Esk your one really opened to me thanks.

p.s sorry if i upset people by bring suicide up.

Victor

Hey no problem.

WhiteWashMan

Helpasap wrote:

p.s sorry if i upset people by bring suicide up.

oh, i dont think it upsets up in a grizzley kind of way, just in the 'for gods sake what a waste of time thinking about suicide is' kind of way.

instead of thinking, 'god, i cant go on, id rather just end it', and being all (as victor says ) ,elodramatic about it, id rather people started to tell themselves that 'whatever happens, i can handle it'
just say that over and over to yourself, and you will be surprised how effective positive reinforcment can be for you.
constantly telling yourself that you cant handle situations, you cant go on, that you are no good and all that other crap will only make you feel like sh1t.

and we can all do without making ourselves feel like that. after all, its my job to put people down

up for anything

Take a look at these links before taking twelve paracetamol again.


http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/1010024.stm
http://www.choice.com.au/viewarticleasonepage.aspx?id=103025&catId=100231&tid=100008&p=1
http://www.pharmweb.net/pwmirror/pwy/paracetamol/pharmwebpic3.html

bagocans

Helpasap wrote:

I tried it Last nite I took 12 Paracetimol But woke up and felt no different.

Don't do that, if it doesn't kill you now overdosing on some of those drugs kills you anyway weeks later through damage to your liver and kidney, painfully, a disgusting way to go often after many have changed your mind.

neadla

I'd like to know what the hell you're running away from. If you commit suicide you're a coward, nothing else, you'll leave behind everyone including your own mother. You can't die weeks later from liver damage, not possible. You could go blind or something like that if it went wrong.

Go and see a trained Psychiatrist. You're obviously suffering from severe depression. They'll help you.

Good luck to you,

néadla :cool:

BEAT

neadla, have you read the last post form OP?
he is over it now...catch up.

OP,
I am glad to found your way through this and sought help through your friends...and you are going to see your Doc. very well done taking the situation into your hands the right way

Goodluck to you,
you are on the right path now.

neadla

I'm sorry about that. Yea, it's could that you sought help and you are getting continous help from your doctor/psychiatrist now. I hope you get good support at home. You have to look after yourself and say to yourself "I'm sick". You have to be there for yourself first. Did you find that talking helped?

Okay, wish you well,
:cool:

Kermitt

To the OP
My friend's sister comitted suicide last week. After being around her and the family for quite a while i still can't understand the devastation left behind. The overriding feeling was of unanswered questions...
What I would say to you is what are the questions. The answers are never easy to find, but professional help is the only way out in severe situations like this. Speaking from experiance here, (my own father attempted to take his own life 3 years ago due to severe depression), getting the right help is the only way.
I wish you all the best.. one day it will be brighter...

Ladypawpaw

neadla wrote:

You can't die weeks later from liver damage, not possible. You could go blind or something like that if it went wrong.

This post is totally incorrect. You can die of liver damage weeks later.

Alpha505

up for anything wrote:

Take a look at these links before taking twelve paracetamol again.


http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/1010024.stm
http://www.choice.com.au/viewarticleasonepage.aspx?id=103025&catId=100231&tid=100008&p=1
http://www.pharmweb.net/pwmirror/pwy/paracetamol/pharmwebpic3.html

Fúcking hell :eek:


To the Op: hope the head is a bit better

LegacyUser

I Went to my Doctor on Thursday night he gave me Some tablets to take untill Tuesday and go back so far they have done nothing to me. Nothing means anything anymore really, money, Work my head is actually all over the place, I told the Doctor everything i just dont no. Thanks anyway People

In_the_sea

Suicide after a breakup is lack of respect for you self!! Come out of it! Your worth more than that! You know it too! If a girl or fella breaks up with u it wasnt meant to be. If they were "that" good and ur life isnt worth living over losing them, why did they break up! They wernt for u mate! You obviously deserve better if they abandon you and leave u for dead!
Some1 better there for ya! Just keep in there! If you killed urself she wud just live her life, not care about you and that is horrible to think of but its true!
I know a lad who killed himself, he was going out with a horrible girl who treated him like sh*te. He threw himself into the river, a week later she was s**gging som1 else! I felt like crying for him! Such a disrespect to his memory. Shows how much she really cared!! If you killed yourself, your ex mightnt be like her, but she wouldnt care so much shed kill herself or stop living her life and stop having a good time. You gotta be careful who you're involved with. People can be just "animals". Selfish and uncaring. You have to take it with a pinch of salt. Seriously, we all feel like you do at some stage so you are brave for seeking advice! So this is a good bit of advice! F*ck her and move on! Shes obsolete! move on you got family who would die for you and she wouldnt! So think about your closest before giving into your farthest! :cool:

Victor

If you have been given anti-depressants, they usually take about a week to kick in.

Try to kep yourself someway busy, do something specific (shopping, cinema, nice meal, whatever) instead of moping around.

TheDoc

omg im sorry i jut have to laugh reading this. You are contemplating suicide cause you got dumped?
Posting for attention are you? I h8 attention seekers. You do know if you kill yourself no one here will care cause no one knows you, so give it a rest and jsut grow some balls for **** sake, suicide, you wouldnt know the first thing, youd piss your pants the minute you pick up the bottle.

Victor

Banned. Try to be at least someway constructive.

Skud

actually looks more like a cry for help then attention seeking, when you are in that position and only then you would understand. Thankfully someone got through to you. Unfortunitely things hurt now and the people here are no strangers to this. Take strong advice from them and hope. it's your friends that you should be proud of. In time of need they cheered you up. You have it better than you think. Those friends are worth more than any girl, hopefully you'll learn that or have learned it already. good luck and stay safe

Victor

Victor wrote:

A bit melodramatic don't you think?

"too be honest" that was worse than what he just posted



Cuz hes right, he shouldnt think about suicide because of a breakup :eek:

Nevyn

Being in love is harsh you give some one the power to make you feel like
they are the world to you and equally to make you feel like they just scooped out your heart with a spoon.

Ah break up could be the final straw in a long line of issues.

LegacyUser

It isent because of me being bumped as such, i repeated my leaving a fews years ago and the college messed it up completly they forgot to send my forms so i could repeat 4 of my subjects so i only had 2 to sit for the leaving found out this just over 3 months before sitting the exams.... And when me and my ex break up it came from no where, for the time i was with her it just put the troubles at the back of my mind they were always there but i was so happy i didnt noticed and since we broke up every issue i have had in the past few years just turned into one MASSIVE issue......

In_the_sea

Well mate,
your gf helped u take ur mind off the problem of ur leavin. But take my advice.doing good in ur leaving cert will get ur more than ur gf. At least if u got a good job u can afford a proper classy girl with the world at ur feet. If u done sh*t and got a little shallow support of some trashy girl, well ud be at loss.

Think longterm... :cool:
She dont care how u do in ur leavin cert.

Esel

Victor wrote:

If you have been given anti-depressants, they usually take about a week to kick in..

They can take up to eight weeks to take effect.

In_the_sea

Taking pills to solve any problem is not the answer. Dependence on anything is not the way to help a problem. That applies to alcholol, caffeine and nicotine..They are just temporary lifters that lead to dependence which leads to more problems trust me.

Talliesin

In_the_sea wrote:

Taking pills to solve any problem is not the answer. Dependence on anything is not the way to help a problem. That applies to alcholol, caffeine and nicotine..They are just temporary lifters that lead to dependence which leads to more problems trust me.

Yes, but they can keep you alive and help you get your ass out of bed and off the sofa and let you get your **** together to give you the space you need to sort things out.

Some conditions just can't be treated other than with pills.

Given that you have not performed an examination (you are a qualified doctor or psychiatrist, yes?) of the OP you aren't really in a position to say whether or not this is the case here.

In_the_sea

No im not,
That sarcasm I take it.. I take very strong pills to keep my mind in tact. I have a lot of experience and you have not right to make any judgements on that. What are u a multiexperienced thread posters on boards.ie. Some of us are not doctors, but we sure cud make better doctors than some Irish doctors. Just because you get high points doesnt mean you're a great doctor!!!! I know a good bit about drug addiction, and study it. what are you then? you obviously agree with using pills to alter brain chemistry even though you're probably not a biochemist? or psychologist/psychiatrist? Or maybe you are well then Im totally I really do apologise!!! YOur are so right!! im very very very very sorry your highness!

Nevyn

In_the_sea you will be banned for personal attcks.
Read the charter
Thaed

In_the_sea

Thats pretty ridiculous but go ahead..ive notin to loose

In_the_sea

By the way thaed you have made a personal attack at me which I have taken offence to..so Im making your aware of that!

This board is not about free speech..its about obeying rules and codes. i think you should review your terms because it is just silly at the reasons for banning on personal attacks when you dont even know the person who claims they have been attacked.
I mean, it is ridiculous that my username is now going to be banned when I aired a view. What is this communism? :mad:

Just make sure that you ban me straight away then and not waste my time! Do it now please!!!!! straight away thats what im asking!

Nevyn

Banned
for personal attcks,
stroppiness,
dragging the thread off topic.
And getting on my nerves and your banned from Parenting for the self same anitcs.
Bye

Talliesin

In_the_sea wrote:

what are you then? you obviously agree with using pills to alter brain chemistry even though you're probably not a biochemist? or psychologist/psychiatrist?

For the sake of the OP (if you're still reading this thread) I'll state that my point is that while pills do have potential pitfalls, very serious ones at that, there is no single right or wrong answer as to whether you should take them. You're the only one that can decide and your doctor or psychiatrist and those very close to you are the only ones that can help you decide.

(Incidentally, since In_the_sea seems to have nothing better to do than insult, troll and pick fights on any part of boards I've seen him on, I think I'll just get rid of him).

Alpha505

Shame this thread was dragged into a row between posters that do nothing to help the OP.

Nevyn

Alpha505 off topic posting is also a bannible offsense,

Alpha505

Apologies.

Alpha505

up for anything wrote:

Take a look at these links before taking twelve paracetamol again.


http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/1010024.stm

Had to read that link again and say :eek: again. Thats one way you dont wanna go.