Is it possible to love someone after 6wks?

TattyTeddy

My boyfriend told me last night that he loves me. I know he's being honset about it. I was actually quite annoyed after as I really don't think it's possible to love someone after 6wks, I mean he doesn't know me properly! What do ye think?

Napoleon Solo

TattyTeddy wrote:

My boyfriend told me last night that he loves me. I know he's being honset about it. I was actually quite annoyed after as I really don't think it's possible to love someone after 6wks, I mean he doesn't know me properly! What do ye think?

I told my ex i loved her after 2 months, i actually was in love with her. She didn't feel the same at the time but did a few months later. Didn't matter cos we're no longer together but it is possible. Sometimes you just know. Hpoe that helps.

TerrorFirmer

I think at that stage you should be just saying "You know, I really like you..."

I know, sometimes, you do just have this feeling, but after 6 weeks, its nice to hear it, but I can't really say its truly possible on a deep level.

So maybe he needs to really slow down and understand what that statement truly means.

kasintahan

I fell totally in love with a girl in 2 hours.

But this was knowing full well that the next morning we'd never see each other again - so I don't suppose this counts as anybody can do unconditional for one night.

Le Rack

I was in love witha guy after im not sure but i think round 2 months and it was true and I still do love him

tinkerbell

There's no time limit on how long it takes you to fall in love with someone, you can't control it - it's just one of those things.

Why are you annoyed with him over him telling you he loves you? Maybe he does genuinely think he loves you.

OY

Love at first sight anyone?
I think that it is possible to love someone after 6 weeks! I do not remember what the exact timeframe was that i knew i loved my wife but i know that it was less than 6 weeks. The first time i said it however was a little longer than that... but yes i think it is very much possible!

secret_squirrel

There are different levels of love - love after 6 weeks is far closer to lust/infatuation than love after months of years. I dont believe you can truly say you love someone until you really know them.*

I'd be pissed if someone told me they loved me after 6 weeks too. Even if you believe it to be true Im not sure you should mention it. It can put a lot of pressure on your partner to reciprocate.


*however the concept of love at first sight really appeals to me, I want to believe in it even though I dont.

Stix

Why do the girls on this thread seem to hate the idea tha ta guy could love them after 6 weeks. Ive fallin for girls after a few hours but would never say it, cos id probably get rejected. Girls go on about how guys dont show emotion and dont dont know what romance is, then they flip when you say you love them. Im confused.

Alana

Yea that's women for you.

I knew that I loved my ex after 6 months, and I think part of me still does...I duno, he didn't say he loved me back straight away, and I wasn't expecting him to, it was just as if the words were racing through my veins, urging to get out....I just had to say it-even now I can't understand it-why like? Why did I HAVE to say it.....

ah crap I miss him now

(and no this isn't the psycho ex that's phoning me...)

After 6 weeks, who knows, but yea I agree with OY about love at first sight, but then again...it is difficult to believe in at times...gotta keep the faith man....

If I were you I wouldnt be freaked out, just explain that u like him, but you aren't in that place (yet...?), and you njoy his company, but that its such a strong emotion that u need to figure it out....

Hang on to the good ones.

Memnoch

wow, I guess "love" really is dead these days as is "romance."

My gf and I professed our undying love for each other in less than a day. Five years later we are still together and very happy together and she is my fiance. Prolly get married within a year or so.

So ya, I don't think 6 weeks is too short

secret_squirrel

TattyTeddy wrote:

My boyfriend told me last night that he loves me.

The cynic in me wonders if he might be trying to get into your knickers....feel free to ignore if he already has.

TattyTeddy

Nope, not trying to get into my knickers!! Thanks for all your replies, very helpful. I really, really like this guy and I think I'm falling in love with him but I'm not IN love with him!! He said he didn't say it so I'd say it back to him, just that that was how he felt.

LadyJ

Yes,it's possible. I loved someone within a day or two.... Still do actually....unfortunately!

Beruthiel

absolutely not
you can fall in lust
or in like
but it takes many months of getting to know someone properly before you can know if it's love or not

Xterminator

Hmm

I have to say, i think its easy to fall in love in 6 weeks. I know i did!

I would ask if he's being seeing a lot of you over the six weeks?

I mean if he's been going out twice a week on a date for six weeks, and maybe i'd agree with you. But if he's been seeing you every possible minute, well then yes, why not!

Anyway actions speak louder than words,

X

Peace

Beruthiel wrote:

but it takes many months of getting to know someone properly before you can know if it's love or not

If you don't take the time to really get to know someone you are probably falling in love with your idea of them.

pickarooney

Depends what you do over those six weeks/months/50 years. You can spend a lifetime with someone and not really know anything about them or just click with them more or less instantly. It all depends on how honest you are. Putting some kind of a timeframe on it is meaningless.

seamus

I would say that he very much believes that he loves you after 6 weeks. At the beginning of a relationship, falling in love is very easy. It's also just as easy to fall out of that love again in as short a time. It takes a little longer to solidify and be sure of it to that "I'm in a mutually loving relationship" point.

Don't be freaked out. Accepting his love, or even reciprocating it doesn't condemn you to a long-term relationship.

Duckjob

Indeed, when you start going up with someone, you generaly get hit with the halo effect, so you see all their good points, and are blind to their faults. I would say that real love occurs when you are fully aware of a persons faults but being with them is so rewarding as to make those faults pale into insignificance.

Baffled

Dont think theres any rule or timeline of when someone can be in love. Its a personal thing and will differ with everybody, whether its 2 seconds or 2 months. Ya just know!

miju

i told my girlfriend i loved her after 2 days and she said the same back. we're together now 4 and half years with a kid an all.

like someone above said when you know, you really know

azezil

Beruthiel wrote:

absolutely not
you can fall in lust
or in like
but it takes many months of getting to know someone properly before you can know if it's love or not

poppy cock, I feel in love with a guy after 4 dates, 2 years later feelings are just as strong.

Beruthiel

azezil wrote:

poppy cock, I feel in love with a guy after 4 dates, 2 years later feelings are just as strong.

yes
but have you been with him and living with him for all that time?

Bottle_of_Smoke

Why would that matter?? ^ very fine line between thinking you're in love and being in love, you only really know when youve lost them

meditraitor

Just to reiterate whats already been said, ye defintely possible to fall in love after a few weeks, sooner even, speaking from experience..
must be hard on you though, just chillin enjoying the ride and then getting hit with the "I Love you" been there, and been that person, :eek:
good luck and enjoy

Medi

Jonny Arson

I think its absolutely frightening that the 'Love' word is almost an innuendo.

I don't think there can be any more bigger compliments in life by someone telling they you that they love you. Embrace the love people!

I do agree to an extent it would be difficult to say that you truly love someone after 6 weeks. I don't see anything wrong at all with that guy telling his girlfriend that he loves her. Thats what relationships are pretty much about. :rolleyes: However it is very hard to know someone really well after been with them for 6 weeks. This stage is the getting to know each other stage but if you have those feelings about someone after 6 weeks it is more lust than anything but lust so often leads to love.

ARGINITE

Knew after 4 months with my ex.
What is it with women and the L word?
Because when I told her she told me that she really liked me but didnt know if she loved me!
Glad I told her tho!

Seraphina

pah
the word love is all about 'your' interpretation of the word. its an abstract thing. a non-entity. some chemical reactions in our brain perpetuated through familiarity.

i always found discussing emotions so confusing. i say love.. and you hear the word and say you understand, but how can you? can you ever really know what someone else means when they say something like that? its not referring to anything solid. even the dictionary's description is vague. these things are what you make them.

i think the word is way over-hyped and over-used anyway. everyone is so desperate to be involved in this thing and they're not even sure what it is.

azezil

Beruthiel wrote:

yes
but have you been with him and living with him for all that time?

TattyTeddy

Thanks very much.......... wow, the over analysation of the love word!!!! Cheers tho

Victor

Seraphina wrote:

pah
the word love is all about 'your' interpretation of the word. its an abstract thing. a non-entity. some chemical reactions in our brain perpetuated through familiarity.
...
i think the word is way over-hyped and over-used anyway. everyone is so desperate to be involved in this thing and they're not even sure what it is.

How .. cynical

Seraphina

Victor wrote:

How .. cynical

yeah my counsellor told me that too maybe this is why i have problems communicating and connecting with people eh?
/me rolls her eyes at herself

silly

took me 3 weeks!

Nightwish

i knew after 1 day. so it does happen ...(dreamy sigh!)

Muineach

I think it all depends on the age of the guy and if he's been in relationships before. For my first proper relationship I was full sure i was in love after about 3 months, and at the time I honestly believed I was but all that ended and know I know what "love" really is, but at the time i "didnt know any better" if you know what I mean.
That said I could fall in love the next girl I meet in a few days, who knows ?

RoyalMarine

my ex and me said we loved each other from about 2 weeks in.
and we got engaged 5 weeks in.
also had a son about 9 months into our relationship. ( so she got pregnant fast )
but we didnt know for about 8 weeks in.
we were happy for ages. had a date planned for a wedding aswell. moved in with each other after about 4 months.
and we truly did love each other. untill she slept with my m8 when i was at work.
oh well.

but i think you can love anyone no matter how long or short u know them

Pink Bunny

Yes, I think so. Like the others said, it depends on how much time you have spemt together within that 6 weeks.
My parents were only dating 2 months before they got engaged and married 6 months after that. They just celebrated their 24th wedding ann, so yeah, I don't see why not.

Coney Island

Stix wrote:

Why do the girls on this thread seem to hate the idea tha ta guy could love them after 6 weeks. Ive fallin for girls after a few hours but would never say it, cos id probably get rejected. Girls go on about how guys dont show emotion and dont dont know what romance is, then they flip when you say you love them. Im confused.

I agree with you...and I know well before 6 weeks if I could possibly love the girl or not. Most of the time if I fall for someone, it would take less than a week (but belive me, I am VERY picky and would probably fall for the 0.5% of the girls out there).
For the reason quoted above many guys stopped saying "I love you" to a girl for the first few months, although it is frustrating....

I sorted this out on a different way with my last girlfriend: we were going out for about 3 months, I was crazy about her on a romantic night I said "I love you", nothing came back....after a few hours I dumped her.

Ron DMC

Coney Island wrote:

I was crazy about her on a romantic night I said "I love you", nothing came back....after a few hours I dumped her.

Why would you dump her if you loved her?

Doodee

I have changed my views on the topic, I think it is possible, just cause someones feelings change doesn't mean they didn't feel that way when they said it, people change and so do their feelings, but one thing you can be sure of is just enjoying it while it happens.
It makes me happy anyways

Coney Island

Ronny Mitchell wrote:

Why would you dump her if you loved her?

Because when I said "I love you", not only I expressed my feelings for her, but I was hoping for her to express her feelings for me....she had the chance to do it, but she didn't. This made me think she wasn't in love....and there is no point to drag on a relatioship with someone who doesn't love after 3 months (time frame long enough to make up your mind).

There is nothing worse then saying "I love you" somebody and not hear it back....especially for an arrogant full of himself as I am.

Gordon

Coney Island wrote:

Because when I said "I love you", not only I expressed my feelings for her, but I was hoping for her to express her feelings for me....she had the chance to do it, but she didn't. This made me think she wasn't in love....and there is no point to drag on a relatioship with someone who doesn't love after 3 months (time frame long enough to make up your mind).

There is nothing worse then saying "I love you" somebody and not hear it back....especially for an arrogant full of himself as I am.

Ugh, there is nothing worse than having your partner tell you that they love you for the SOLE reason of hearing it back.

I guess it makes fickle sense to you though if you have a high turnover of relationships that you love each person within a few weeks of knowing them, or not you must need a tool to economise your relationship productivity.

LegacyUser

TattyTeddy wrote:

My boyfriend told me last night that he loves me. I know he's being honset about it. I was actually quite annoyed after as I really don't think it's possible to love someone after 6wks, I mean he doesn't know me properly! What do ye think?

FWIW, you sound like my current wife, who I told I loved her after four weeks, and who didn't believe me then. Eight years on ...

Glipmac

My current girlfriend told me she loved me with in the week, true i was freaked out but i thought but what the hay at least she is not gonna cheat on me... so go with the flow

secret_squirrel

Glipmac wrote:

My current girlfriend told me she loved me with in the week, true i was freaked out but i thought but what the hay at least she is not gonna cheat on me... so go with the flow

Now thats the pragmatic approach. Nice one!

marshmallow

it's definitely possible

CathyMoran

I have fallen in love at first sight, but looking back I could not have known that for at least a year.

Could someone love you within 6 weeks?
Yes.

Could it be real love?
Only time will tell.

crazymonkey

my last ex, told me after 2 weeks that she loved me, freaked me out big tme, two weeks later i dumped her, could not handle it, now we are the best of mates,,,

Dave

I love lamp.

Tar.Aldarion

lamp loves you