2 Pope Jokes

DeLaBass

Now that the father of the Catholic church has died don't you think they should use the opportunity to get with the times when selecting their new representitive with the introduction of Pope Idol?

Have you heard that instead of burying the Pope, the Catholic church has decided to cash in on the incident. They're going to cover him in perfume, cremate him, then sell the ashes as Pope-pouri!

snappieT

I'm not even going to dignify that with a reply.
Oops

jcoote

for ****'s sake..at least your tryin

DeLaBass

Thanks i'm quite proud of them!

PS dont tell me i'm going to burn in hell coz i'm an atheist

[My epitaph--- Here lies an atheist. All dressed up and nowhere to go]

kasintahan

Those jokes were so low brow as to be moustaches...

snappieT

For the record, I'm atheist also. But I can respect the beliefs of others

DeLaBass

then you are the worst kind of atheist. I have no respect others peoples "beliefs" but i will respect other people and not enforce my beliefs on them. Check what you post before you put words in my mouth, lets keep it friendly!

Healio

DeLaBass wrote:

Thanks i'm quite proud of them!

*cough*

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=229354&page=2&pp=20

simu

kasintahan wrote:

Those jokes were so low brow as to be moustaches...

Yeah, pubic moustaches.

But a few steps lower and they'll be so bad they're good. It's all circular.

I'll give it a go:

-Who will replace JP II?

-I don't know yet but I pope he'll do a good job.

-Yes, we'll know soon enough popefully.

-Indeed, pope springs eternal.

-I'd rather poped you'd say that in alexandrine form.

-Not a pope.

goin'_to_the_PS

wow no offence(actually....yes, loads of offence) but they are awful

NotMe

I poped it wouldn't come to this. Disgraceful!

simu

All this shows is that there is no catholic sense of humour.

...

catholic: 2. Including or concerning all humankind; universal: “what was of catholic rather than national interest” (J.A. Froude).

atheist

Will the next pope be called George-Ringo?

simu

atheist wrote:

Will the next pope be called George-Ringo?

"Holy" unlikely but who (vati)can tell what will happen?

DeLaBass

Healio wrote:

*cough*

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=229354&page=2&pp=20

never saw that thread so.......... you can clear that cough from your throat but it may be hard when you are the green flem of society!

Squirrel

I'm also an atheist but you gotta respect the Pope, all the other work he's done. The man is a legend. R.I.P

Zombienosh

I pope to god hes ok

DeLaBass

never done nuffin for me no - vickie pollard

Shabadu

DeLaBass wrote:

then you are the worst kind of atheist. I have no respect others peoples "beliefs" but i will respect other people and not enforce my beliefs on them. Check what you post before you put words in my mouth, lets keep it friendly!

AHAHAHAHA!

'you are the worst kind of atheist'. Now that's funny.

Why? Because he respects other people's beliefs? Because he has standards and possibly morals?

You, sir, are a cabbage.

DeLaBass

Jr.Shabadu wrote:

AHAHAHAHA!

'you are the worst kind of atheist'. Now that's funny.

Why? Because he respects other people's beliefs? Because he has standards and possibly morals?

You, sir, are a cabbage.

I look down on anyone of any creed with religious beliefs. It is non-sensical drivel for the mindless masses.

Shabadu

'non-sensical'!

How on earth can you look down on someone from all the way down there?

Learn about hyphens before you call anyone mindless.

DeLaBass

ok i'll do that. Hmm... so you have nothing to say about my point yet concentrate on the irrelevant nuances of my grammar. Next time i'll write in a formal manner, gold-leaf, laminated...the works, you'll love it.

billy the squid

DeLaBass wrote:

Thanks i'm quite proud of them!

PS dont tell me i'm going to burn in hell coz i'm an atheist

[My epitaph--- Here lies an atheist. All dressed up and nowhere to go]

why would an athiest need an epithaph, or a headstone for that mater.

one question though, are you insured againtst Acts of God?

DeLaBass

Why would we need a headstone?? Errr... doh because i'll be buried eventually, tis the dont thing you know. Go figure!

Gordon

I heard that Stephen Hawking is being thought of as being the next Pope due to his studies on mass.

Shabadu

DeLaBass wrote:

ok i'll do that. Hmm... so you have nothing to say about my point yet concentrate on the irrelevant nuances of my grammar. Next time i'll write in a formal manner, gold-leaf, laminated...the works, you'll love it.

Alright, let's look at the content of your posts.

-You feel that it's acceptable to 'look down' on people with religious beliefs.

-You feel that it is drivel for the mindless masses.

-You flame Snapscan and Healio despite the fact they weren't overtly critical of your post- hilariously, you call Snapscan 'the worst kind of atheist' and then ask everyone to 'keep it friendly' in the same breath.

-You claim you respect others and wouldn't 'enforce'(sic) your beliefs on them.


In my opinion it is the highest form of idiocy to look down on someone for their beliefs, religious or otherwise, as long as they aren't predjudiced twoards any sex or minority.

I realise the catholic church is not very tolerant of homosexuals or women, but it does not mean that all people with religous beliefs swallow that tripe.

It is possible to have christian ethics and morals without buying into the more ridiculous aspects of some christian faiths, notably 'women should stay at home', 'abortions for none', 'gay people are sick' etc.

Christ never expounded any of these ideas, just some right-wing wierdo extremists. The same goes for most organised religious figures, they weren't saying these idiotic things, just a portion of their followers, who unfortunately seem to be the most vocal.

I believe that if people had a more tolerant, loving, 'christian' attitude the world would be a whole lot nicer.

I do realise the irony in the fact that I wasn't very tolerant of your muppetry, but I'm crotchety, dammit!

Shabadu

Gordon wrote:

I heard that Stephen Hawking is being thought of as being the next Pope due to his studies on mass.

Now that is a good pope joke. Hooray for Gordon!

Chinafoot

DeLaBass wrote:

I look down on anyone of any creed with religious beliefs. It is non-sensical drivel for the mindless masses.

so basically you're just narrow-minded?

thats even more tragic than your "jokes".

OLDYELLAR

distasteful :rolleyes:

DeLaBass

Jr.Shabadu wrote:

Alright, let's look at the content of your posts.

-You feel that it's acceptable to 'look down' on people with religious beliefs.

-You feel that it is drivel for the mindless masses.

-You flame Snapscan and Healio despite the fact they weren't overtly critical of your post- hilariously, you call Snapscan 'the worst kind of atheist' and then ask everyone to 'keep it friendly' in the same breath.

-You claim you respect others and wouldn't 'enforce'(sic) your beliefs on them.


In my opinion it is the highest form of idiocy to look down on someone for their beliefs, religious or otherwise, as long as they aren't predjudiced twoards any sex or minority.

I realise the catholic church is not very tolerant of homosexuals or women, but it does not mean that all people with religous beliefs swallow that tripe.

It is possible to have christian ethics and morals without buying into the more ridiculous aspects of some christian faiths, notably 'women should stay at home', 'abortions for none', 'gay people are sick' etc.

Christ never expounded any of these ideas, just some right-wing wierdo extremists. The same goes for most organised religious figures, they weren't saying these idiotic things, just a portion of their followers, who unfortunately seem to be the most vocal.

I believe that if people had a more tolerant, loving, 'christian' attitude the world would be a whole lot nicer.

I do realise the irony in the fact that I wasn't very tolerant of your muppetry, but I'm crotchety, dammit!

i like cake, i do

Tobias Greeshman

Jr.Shabadu wrote:

You, sir, are a cabbage.

Thats the funniest thing I've read in this thread.

These pope jokes are so lame, you should write jokes for christmas crackers.

DeLaBass

silas wrote:

Thats the funniest thing I've read in this thread.

These pope jokes are so lame, you should write jokes for christmas crackers.

It made me laugh too but only because I actually eat alot of cabbage so he wasn't too far off the mark!

sprinkles

Jr.Shabadu wrote:

Alright, let's look at the content of your posts.

-You feel that it's acceptable to 'look down' on people with religious beliefs.

-You feel that it is drivel for the mindless masses.

-You flame Snapscan and Healio despite the fact they weren't overtly critical of your post- hilariously, you call Snapscan 'the worst kind of atheist' and then ask everyone to 'keep it friendly' in the same breath.

-You claim you respect others and wouldn't 'enforce'(sic) your beliefs on them.


In my opinion it is the highest form of idiocy to look down on someone for their beliefs, religious or otherwise, as long as they aren't predjudiced twoards any sex or minority.

I realise the catholic church is not very tolerant of homosexuals or women, but it does not mean that all people with religous beliefs swallow that tripe.

It is possible to have christian ethics and morals without buying into the more ridiculous aspects of some christian faiths, notably 'women should stay at home', 'abortions for none', 'gay people are sick' etc.

Christ never expounded any of these ideas, just some right-wing wierdo extremists. The same goes for most organised religious figures, they weren't saying these idiotic things, just a portion of their followers, who unfortunately seem to be the most vocal.

I believe that if people had a more tolerant, loving, 'christian' attitude the world would be a whole lot nicer.

I do realise the irony in the fact that I wasn't very tolerant of your muppetry, but I'm crotchety, dammit!

I don't get it ............. :rolleyes:

Eoghan-psych

Squirrel wrote:

I'm also an atheist but you gotta respect the Pope, all the other work he's done. The man is a legend. R.I.P

Yes, you have to admire a man who institutionalised the covering up of clerical abuse.

You have to love a mand who, by condemning the use of condoms, has condemned tens of thousands of innocent people to protracted deaths from AIDS and other diseases, and their associated effects.

Yes, a truly admirable chap.

TerrorFirmer

You guys think its funny to joke about the popes death?

Just because hes a public figure, one of the worlds most important and biggest, you think that makes it acceptable to make light of his death?

Would you make fun and jokes about a realatives death? A neighbours death? Hell, would you make jokes about the local priests death?

I dont think so. I think jokes concerning the death of the pope are sick and grossly offensive. And overall, should not be allowed.

smoke.me.a.kipper

atheist wrote:

Will the next pope be called George-Ringo?

lol!!!

Blub2k4

MobileInfantry wrote:

You guys think its funny to joke about the popes death?

Just because hes a public figure, one of the worlds most important and biggest, you think that makes it acceptable to make light of his death?

Would you make fun and jokes about a realatives death? A neighbours death? Hell, would you make jokes about the local priests death?

I dont think so. I think jokes concerning the death of the pope are sick and grossly offensive. And overall, should not be allowed.

Like the one:
What did the pope say to the paedophile priest?
Hello Monsignor.

The Bollox

atheist wrote:

Will the next pope be called George-Ringo?

LMAO!

Shabadu

DeLaBass wrote:

It made me laugh too but only because I actually eat alot of cabbage so he wasn't too far off the mark!

I'm a girl, DeLaBass, but the fact you like cabbage has redeemed you.


Oh, and cheers Silas

D-Generate

Gordon wrote:

I heard that Stephen Hawking is being thought of as being the next Pope due to his studies on mass.

I love that one! Brilliant!

Squirrel

Eoghan-psych wrote:

Yes, you have to admire a man who institutionalised the covering up of clerical abuse.

You have to love a mand who, by condemning the use of condoms, has condemned tens of thousands of innocent people to protracted deaths from AIDS and other diseases, and their associated effects.

Yes, a truly admirable chap.

So, you're saying that the pope never did anything good in his life. I don't agree with the abuse but the Christian beliefs don't allow contraception. If we can't admire the pope there isn't alot of people who we can.
Why do you think he was never mentioned as a contender for the papalcy before he got it, his work was behind the scenes, but because you never heard it it didn't happen. It's horrible when people focus on worse points when someone dies, shouldn't we highlight all the good he's done?

TerrorFirmer

I actually think its a disgrace that the Mods allow offensive and insulting jokes about the pope after he's just died.

Shabadu

MobileInfantry wrote:

You guys think its funny to joke about the popes death?

Just because hes a public figure, one of the worlds most important and biggest, you think that makes it acceptable to make light of his death?

Would you make fun and jokes about a realatives death? A neighbours death? Hell, would you make jokes about the local priests death?

I dont think so. I think jokes concerning the death of the pope are sick and grossly offensive. And overall, should not be allowed.

er...

MobileInfantry wrote:

I actually think its a disgrace that the Mods allow offensive and insulting jokes about the pope after he's just died.

Don't read the Jesus LOL thread, tbh.

DeLaBass

Jr.Shabadu wrote:

I'm a girl, DeLaBass, but the fact you like cabbage has redeemed you.


Oh, and cheers Silas

Cool thanks!! I'm actually a huge vegetable eatin kinda freak. I down brocolli by the bucket load! And carrots, don't get me started on the sweet sweet golden slithers of temptation!

---

This thread is getting so good! I think it could only possibly get any better if we got some Terri Schiavo jokes in here but that really would be asking alot.


And i'll end on this joke to tie it all together......


What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair!!! :eek:

NotMe

Jr.Shabadu wrote:

Don't read the Jesus LOL thread, tbh.

BioHazRd

DeLaBass banned for a week, as he is now becoming annoying, and he seems to feel the need to see how low he can go before I take out the banning stick.......well guess what, he found that point.

Bio

kmart6

Very distasteful and deserved to be banned :mad: :mad: :mad:

Gross Halfwit

I heard that the next pope will be black. You know what this means...the first pope to be on Cribs!

Or better yet...Pope my Ride! No DVD players just a lot of bullet proofing ( Now theres faith in action )

I dont mean to be disrespectful but jokes are jokes.

Le Rack

I love it!!!! a girl in my class actually made a pope idol joke herself monday morning and we split ourselves for about 20 minutes over it. and as a fellow athiest I think i might have my body dumped in a field to fertilise the grass and have the crows peck out my eyes, although your plan is good to....

Simi

Or better yet...Pope my Ride! No DVD players just a lot of bullet proofing ( Now theres faith in action )

lol. "Omfg man, you put holy water in the trunk..dog."

muckwarrior

MobileInfantry wrote:

I actually think its a disgrace that the Mods allow offensive and insulting jokes about the pope after he's just died.

If ya don't like it then don't read it! Simple as that! You may find it insulting but most people have enough cop on and maturity to realise that a joke is just a joke. It may not be to everyones taste but if everything that someone was offended by was banned then we'd have very little left to laugh at.