Struggling to get back on bike after a crash

lizzylad84

Hi all

Last April I was I. A very very bad (almost fatal crash) while racing.

I've barely had the urge to look at my bike since, and I feel like I've lost the desire to return to the sport.

Now i know theres no "one size fits all rule" but im just wondering if anyone has ever been in similar position? If so, how did you get ba k on the bike

realdanbreen

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058415206/struggling-to-get-back-on-bike-after-a-crash

Did you collide with other cyclists or was it an accident with a vehicle.

at1withmyself

Could you try some greenways and just some casual easy riding to try ease back into it?

alentejo

You mention cycling as a sport.

You should forget about the sport element of it and try to enjoy it, possibly on a nice sunny day on a greenway!

lizzylad84

I was racing when the accident happened. Ridwr in front hit a pot hole, I hit him. Travelling at approx 50kmph. Spent 10 days in icu in hospital. 6 months to get back to work due to brain bleed, along with broken shoulder and fractured back

dahat

Would it be worth speaking to a professional about fears of going back on the bike?

lizzylad84

I have done already, but I definitely think another chat would help. Maybe life's trying to tell me that I've had a good few years cycling, had so e good tines but to take up a new hobby

Luxman

In a slightly different boat to you, but have been off the bike for 9 months due to illness , am trying to get back to it and I would love to say I found the silver bullet, but I haven't. I did find the warm weather more welcoming but group spins at the minute are not suitable for me. I used to do a lot of solo spins so this wasn't a factor, ie the social aspect to it. I still make excuses not to bother to go out, so it's a mental hurdle to get over. Someone told me once (they used to love running) so without deciding to actually go out, they would put on their runners and then the sequence would follow, this worked a bit for me, getting dressed (bibs and faff) meant I was somewhat committed to the follow on step (shoes, water bottle, Garmin, etc), you get the idea. Hope you are on the mend and find your mojo once more.

fat bloke

Jesus. That's rough. I've a neighbour had a bad smash in a race and he's been a long time getting back pedalling but he's getting there.

Me personally I used to be mad for motorcycling but a bad crash blunted my interest in it. Tried a few times to rekindle the flame but it just didn't do it for me anymore and I don't particularly miss it.

Like the previous poster I've had a rough 9 months on/off the road bike with illness. I'm nowhere near my previous abilities and won't be racing at all for a long time. But when I do get on the bike for just slow gentle spins I still love it and derive a lot of mindfulness and enjoyment from it, which keeps me at it. If I stopped enjoying it then I think I'd put it aside and seek that enjoyment from something else.

So I guess it's probably worth trying to find the spark again, but ultimately if it's not doing it for you any more, then don't be afraid to move on either and try something else. There'll come a day for every single one of us when we'll have to hang the bike up. Maybe it's just going happen to you a bit earlier than you thought. Best of luck either way.

Large bottle small glass

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123521576#Comment_123521576

I regularly ride with a former very well known racing cyclist who had a major crash over 30 years ago when he was in his prime.

He never really got back at the racing properly.

However know he enjoys being on a bike more than anyone I know; does bike packing, gravel riding etc etc. A pure pleasure to ride with.

His balance and control on the bike is on a different level to anyone I've ridden with but his brain and body never forgot the crash and he had to leave it go; you might have to as well.

You can get back riding again but you may or may not have to leave the racing go. Your loved ones are probably going to find it even harder to leave you back at it.

Some therapist are going to be better than others at helping you get over the trauma and shock of a severe incident. I know there is special therapies but your professional is going to have to guide you. (There is interesting research around MDMA and talk therapy in treating PTSD which might develop, don't ask me how I know that 😁)

The rational part of your brain might want to get back on bike but the other parts of your brain might still need a bit of help processing the idea.

Best of luck, cycling is generally very safe, hope you get back at it.

JIdontknow

Have you asked yourself why you don’t want to get back on the bike? Is it fear, is it lack of fitness and ability after so long out, the fear of failure as opposed to genuine fear of the accident? Do you mind me asking, would you have many years left cycling at the level you were at if you went back? The reason I’m asking is the brain is a strong but strange thing and it can manifest different scenarios and with sports stars it makes them ask the question is the juice worth the squeeze anymore. Personally, and I don’t know you at all but whatever you decide do it with no regrets. Maybe get back on the bike gradually in a casual spin just down around the locality if they’re a bike lane and take it from there and build it up and see if the spark is there, as opposed to park it up and then a few months or years down the line think I should have given it another go. Only you know this, if the hunger is still there but it’s being inhibited by fear, etc. maybe I’m talking bollocks though!!

magicbastarder

i've no well of experience to draw on in dealing with an issue like that; but i'm curious where was the balance for you between cycling and competing? i.e. which drove which?

one thing i would say is there's no shame in losing an interest like cycling given the experience you've had. the main thing would be finding something else to provide that fulfilment if cycling can't provide it any more.

Aurelian

Remember you don't have to if you don't really want to.

I had no problem coming back from crashes but after 10 years of racing in various disciplines I was a little burnt out. Someone suggested I take a month off training. That was 5 years ago and I've barely been on the bike since. I've gone from 5 times a week to 10 times a year!

I just go out now when the weather is nice or a friend wants to. I can just enjoy it now and it's not all consuming so I've taken up other sports.

Dont be afraid of not training and racing. You can cycle whenever the mood takes you!

lizzylad84

Cheers folks.

I'm content with not racing. I known of two former club mates that had very very serious accidents and ended in wheelchairs and I suppose on some level I'm sort of afford that that could have happened me, and if I crash again would it happen to me.

II'll Give the coffee group at a more sedate pase and distance a go at some stage.

magicbastarder

i am usually wary of suggesting things that worked for me; but i've mentioned before here that i set out to cycle every (non-urban) road in north county dublin. i found that was a good motivator to get out on the bike, is it possible that you could set yourself a similar challenge?

lizzylad84

I do have a favourite coffee shop that u could aim to get back to.

Maybe set a date in my mind and aim to cycle to that coffee shop by or on that date

MojoMaker

What about getting back into triathlon @lizzylad84?

Radial

I crashed out on ice, two years ago, doing the festive 500 (having successfully completed the three previous years). Broke a hip and sustained some other less serious injuries. I lay on the side of the road for three hours, before finally being picked up by an ambulance and taken to hospital. Now have a pin holding my hip together and had a 9 month recovery before I was able to get back on a bike.

I know exactly how you feel, and while my injuries were not as serious as yours, I struggled to get back on the bike for fear I'd crash again on the same hip and next time lose my mobility completely. I can't run anymore, but I can walk quite well and cycle a bike. I know the chances of a similar crash are small, but I wasn't able to shake that somewhat irrational fear from my mind.

What worked for me was I purchased a second hand Brompton and graduated from spins up and down the road to using it for my 10km commute into Dublin City Centre. This gave me the confidence to get back on a road bike, at first slow spins around the Phoenix Park and then some descents (carefully) around the Strawberry Beds.

I also started a project, to build a bike, which I hope to use for bike packing, completed a few months ago. Building it gave me the urge to use it and it's this bike that I've cycled most, out as far as 50km recently. The next step is to go bike packing locally during the summer, hip permitting.

I also rationalise how I got injured, hitting ice at speed, and take confidence from the many km's I'd cycled previously, without major incident. By not taking chances when there could be ice, I can avoid a repetition of the circumstances that caused the crash.

In your case, by not getting back into racing, at least for the moment, you can cycle in a more predictable environment, minimising the likelihood of something similar happening again. The main thing for me was a gradual return to cycling and regaining my confidence to get on a bike.

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123527150#Comment_123527150

Jeez, how do you end up lying on the road for three hours at a planned event? Was their no medical cover - Civil Defence or St John Ambulance or anything? Was it a very rural event requiring a long journey for the ambulance?

cletus

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123527766#Comment_123527766

Festive 500 isn't an organised event.

Morris Garren

I had 3 crashes in a 9 month period- including during the infamous old 'Gorey' 3 -day, but the 3rd one was particularly nasty as it wasn't in a race and I suffered a serious blow to the head. I can understand the challenges that the OP faced, especially the idea of competing again. Truth be told, I was never as strong or as focused on road racing any time since these crashes, but it is due to a number of factors i.e., less desire to take risks, the inevitably of getting older, weight gain that is hard to shift, alongside the psychological affects of serious bike-related injuries.

It took 4 months to get riding again, found myself bursting into tears occasionally and having to dismount, all a natural response to the type of injury.

Twas almost a year before I was confident enough to race and was determined to do so. I made my comeback in Mondello the following summer, and got bawled out of it by an A1 rider for not holding a wheel or rolling through with a couple laps left. I got very upset at that moment and pulled out of the race: these involuntary reactions are proof that you need to be very much mentally prepared and in a solid frame of mind for bunch style bike racing, otherwise I was putting everyone at risk. I was physically in good shape, but mentally quite weak. His teammate then gave me a lecture on how to ride afterwards, which didnt help. I decided to let them know that I was returning from serious injury, after which they backed down and actually apologised.

I was much better thereafter and gradually took in more races and continue to do so. My preference is now for off road events and time trials. Road racing isn't the only way to enjoy competitive cycling. I wish the OP the very best, and I do believe that all of us need to figure out what's best for oneself. Some good clubmates and cycling buddies are best assets you can have to overcome adversity, and almost all competitive cyclists have had crashes and are bound to empathise with you at some level 💪

AndrewJRenko

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123527786#Comment_123527786

Thanks for the clarification. Even with that, three hours waiting seems extreme.

monkeyslayer

Twice almost crippled by inattentive drivers with cracks to my neck and spine and accompanied serious injuries I often wonder why I bother getting on the bike. Especially after the 2nd time. Two years on I still find it really hard. I used to be so oblivious to traffic, I knew it was there and interacted accordingly but never really thought of the consequences of things going wrong… but now more than ever. I know it really doesn't take much to really get messed up, both accidents were at <20kmph. I think about this all the time. I got treatment for PTSD and the therapist said something along the lines of "you don't remember but your body certainly does" and it rings true. All I can really suggest is just go out and roll around some roads and it'll come back, see how you go. You wouldn't be asking if you didn't miss it! I cycle now with absolutely nothing to prove, I'm out and that's enough for me. Green-ways and small rural roads are great, and be patient, with yourself and with the other road users, the driving in this country is shocking as I'm sure you're aware, but don't let it get to you.

Luxman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123532793#Comment_123532793

'Your body keeps the score' is the title of a book dealing with PTSD and trauma. Memories can be suppressed by the mind but the stress and anxiety is kept by the body and can reveal itself in ill health etc.

magicbastarder

the stress and anxiety is kept by the body

colour me sceptical; if they mean the body 'stores' the stress, i would need convincing on that.

Large bottle small glass

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123533885#Comment_123533885

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31wjVhCcI5Y

Good as you'll get in terms of making complicated processes dumbed down for consumption.

@lizzylad84 podcast is heavy going, despite being dumbed down by host , but well worth a listen.

Yeah Right

A little different, perhaps, but in case it's worth anything……

I'm not a 'sport' cyclist, merely use it as a means of transport. In/out of work, up/back to the shops or pub etc. Never really been on a spin with others, bar the odd trip up Howth head with the lads.

I was in a serious enough incident about 10 years ago. Cycling to work and a bloke came out of a side road without looking my direction and hit me. Bike stayed where it was and I smashed his windscreen with my chin and went over the bonnet. Serious twisting/torque injuries to my brainstem and wiped out my short term memories. Can't remember from about 12 hrs prior to the crash up to 4 days afterwards.

Had to give up everything 'high impact' as a result for 12 months. Took 18 months to actually buy a new bike and another 5 weeks to work up the courage to get, literally, back in the saddle. Wasn't expecting how unsettled I would be. Paranoid to bits and scared out of my mind. Took a good few trips before it started to feel a bit more normal. Cycle paths through parks and greenways were a godsend. Even tested the new machine on its maiden voyage by cycling to the industrial estate in Clonshaugh.

In the end, it took a lot of smaller journeys before I could face even a 6-10k cycle. What finally got me over the hump was telling myself "everyone on the road is out to kill you. Directly or indirectly, they all have a chance of causing you life-changing consequences, so keep your head on a swivel and take no chances". I still do it, every time I get on the bike. You'll get there eventually. Recognising that it's an issue is half the battle.

Might sound stupid to some, but hey…….if it looks stupid, but it works, it ain't that stupid really.

koutoubia

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123533885#Comment_123533885

Long story short..18 months after my fall I ended up going to an injury therapist. She specialises in injury trauma and it associated effects.

She explained that when the body senses a fall or some such the muscles around the spine and vital organs spasm to protect the organs/spine. A lot of the time that spasm never fully relaxes and in my case one set of muscles was still in spasm.

3 sessions of dry needling with her and the difference was incredible.`

Magilla Gorilla

Another broken hip survivor here! Not racing, just lost the rear wheel on a roundabout at the end of a spin. No obvious reason why as I was just spinning home.
As my hip was pinned, I had to wait four months before I tried cycling again. I started on a regular town bike and just did a very slow spin for a few kilometres. I was extremely nervous of falling and looked like I had just learned to cycle. Once I did the first one , it became easier each time. After a couple of weeks I got back on the racing bike but I set the pedals at their loosest and always went on my own. Again, I was nervous, particularly at junctions, traffic lights and generally stopping and starting. As I got more confidence, I started to cycle to meet the lads at the coffee stop and would cycle back again on my own. Eventually I got back into the group spins but I warned the lads to be careful around me on wet roads, sharp bends etc. as I tended to slow down. I’m now back probably 95%, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get back to where I was but I’m ok with that. I had the pins removed so that helped me I think.

TLDR: start slowly on your own and build gently.

magicbastarder

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123535376#Comment_123535376

cheers - i know someone who had read that book and she described it to me as if the body had a 'brain' with memories of injury which what set up my scepticism.

selenie

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123552045#Comment_123552045

That slow and steady approach sounds like a smart way to rebuild trust in your body and the bike. I totally get what you said about never quite getting back to 100% but being okay with it, sometimes just being able to ride again at all is the win.