We didn't discuss this

suvigirl

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123381073#Comment_123381073

So it's totally your money? And not from shared money? Then I don't see what the problem is.

LambshankRedemption

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123381706#Comment_123381706

I'd imagine it's because when you are married all money is shared money. Worst case scenario, if the OP loses his job tomorrow, his wife will be paying the 300 a month until he finds a new job.

There's a difference between saying "I'm thinking about getting a new car" and "I've bought a new car". The OP doesn't mention kids. Maybe the wife is thinking/hoping/planning for kids and was thinking their next car should be a kid friendly type with lots of boot space.

There was also clearly no discussion on whether to go electric or not.

Ash.J.Williams

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058407075/we-didnt-discuss-this

I only buy cars at 80k😀

LambshankRedemption

How to approach this in the future so the obvious to me is not a surprise to her?

You to wife: "That car i was interested in has just dropped in price by 20%, and I'm thinking about putting down a deposit, what do you think?"

That's how you approach things in the future.

ledwithhedwith

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123381569#Comment_123381569

Spending more than a 100 quid??

MrMusician18

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123381569#Comment_123381569

Confirmation of €100 purchases, many people would think thats an excessive level of financial control over your partner. That's groceries for two level.

Financial freedom is essential in relationships but large purchases do need joint consideration. The level at which that is will of course depend on the couple and their financial situation but these days it really has to be a couple of hundred euro for individual purchases. I think our relationship would be in a bad place if my wife was effectively asking for permission to get her hair done.

circadian

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123382327#Comment_123382327

Obviously things like groceries, insurance or whatever aren't an issue. We have our own accounts for nights out but if we need to dip into the shared fund for something, then it's just courteous to say "Hey, I need/want this thing, going to take 100 from the shared fund" or whatever.

Mellor

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123381073#Comment_123381073

If it's fully your car and cost. It's fully up to you. Her car is hers.
Especially if the finance/loan is is not joint liability

Mellor

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123382373#Comment_123382373

It's very different when referring to a shared account, especially as a single income family/couple.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123382219#Comment_123382219

I'd imagine it's because when you are married all money is shared money.

For some people it is. But it's not the case for every married couple. Many two income couples keep financial independence.

micks_address

Sounds like a bit of EV anxiety in the mix.. my wife is the same.. we have two cars and she wouldnt be without an engine or gears(insanity).. she's started driving our EV though and as she has i think she's getting to know quite quickly how easy they are to drive and live with… if you can - try and sort a charger at home.. i feel like she might be less anti ev next time the second car is up for change. Maybe getting your wife to try the ev a few times on shorter journeys and take the charging mythos out of the equation might make her approach it more favorably.

suvigirl

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/123382219#Comment_123382219

I know married people who do not share their money. Some money is for joint expenses but what's theirs is theirs.

LambshankRedemption

Ok, I wasn't saying every married couple are exactly the same and manage money in exactly the same way.

Some comments here are comparing it to an overspend of €100.

A new Skoda Envaq according to their website is 52k. The OP got it for 20% off, so 41k.

All I am saying is, spending, or commiting to pay 41k without discussing it with the wife(in some form of detail), I am not surprised she is annoyed, even if they do not share their money.

HildaOgdenx

Mod - We will leave it at that as the thread is veering completely into discussion, despite the reminder upthread.

Please feel free to start a thread elsewhere re cars or splitting of household budgets, if any of you wish to.

Thanks to those who took the time to give advice.