Neighbour flinging cat's poo into our drive

macmurchu

So we moved to a new estate in the last 2 months. We have 2 cats, neutered females about 1 yr old. They don't use the litter tray in the house anymore and spend a fair bit of time outside. They must be pooping anywhere, perhaps in neighbours' gardens.

Twice today and once last week cat poo has been placed in the middle of our driveway. Footprints this morning led from a house across the street, coinciding with when it was dropped in our drive.

We have 2 young kids, and they and their friends on the road are in and out of our drive all the time. I am assuming this guy is the one doing it.

Am I the asshole getting very angry at this? I'm in my way home from work to a wife who feels very threatened and on the receiving end of aggression. Whole I appreciate it's not nice having poop in your flower bed, the average grown up would have a word and tell me there's a problem. As opposed to flinging poop that might be hazardous to young kids. People can be reasoned with, cats can't.

Dial Hard

Let me get this straight, your cats are shıtting in your neighbour's garden and you think they're the problem because they have an issue with it???

And you're going to have to explain this one for the cheap seats: the poo is potentially hazardous to young kids when it's been returned to your driveway, but not when it's in his garden? Hokaaaaay.

You've only 1 solution of it's a health hazard for your kids and your wife is feeling threatened.

Remove the cats from the equation and re-home them so they don't go upsetting your neighbours who've probably spent a lot of hard earned cash getting their flowerbeds the way they want them and feel endangered by cat poo in the soil as they weed and plant flowers and bulbs

Baybay

Cat owner here but whose cat mostly uses a litter tray & will in fact come inside to do so. Neighbours are also cat owners so maybe that makes a difference.

However, I have returned poo to another neighbour over the lifetime of their two Great Danes both of whom preferred our garden, particularly around the childrens’ swings.

We never spoke about it but it was a fair amount that I placed inside their garden wall most days & it was gone each time I put more. I like to think that we had an understanding as otherwise we were good friends.

Would never have put it in the middle of the driveway

Rows Grower

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058367481/neighbour-flinging-cats-poo-into-our-drive

Yes, you're the asshole.

Dial Hard

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122579148#Comment_122579148

I'm really struggling to understand how exactly the OP's wife is feeling "very threatened" by finding her own cats' poo in her driveway, tbh.

ELM327

YATAH.

con747

"Footprints this morning led from a house across the street" Interesting, how did you see the footprints? Did you put down some ultraviolet dust?

coolbeans

Why does your wife feel threatened and on the receiving end of aggression? Dramatic much?! It's not aggression, it's just giving back the hazardous filth that is cat **** to its owner. There's no way you're right on this. Some neighbours would be far more aggressive and give your wife cause to feel threatened. This person hasn't. Have a look at yourselves and sort it out.

This does not bode well for you that you have already annoyed your new neighbours after just two months, and lack the self awareness to understand that you/your pets are at fault here. Given your troubles with the neighbours in your previous home, and the hope of a fresh start, you might want to consider going over to apologise to these neighbours for your pets s**ting in their gardens. Bad first impressions can be difficult to overcome.

nachouser

Seems like more of an AH thread, tbh. Give the pet mods a break.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122579205#Comment_122579205

it was snowing

billyhead

Op. I think you need to apologise to your neighbours and strive to keep your cars under

the_amazing_raisin

You're both arseholes, you for letting your cats go halfway feral and use other people's gardens as a toilet, and your neighbour for throwing the poo back at your house instead of talking to you about it

I would suggest you try the adult approach, go and apologise for your cats and say you weren't aware. Say that you would have preferred he spoke to you about it but you'd like to come to a solution that works for both of you

Cats can be discouraged from pooing in flowerbeds by putting something string smelling there. I've had success with lavender plants, but I believe mint might also work

I've also heard a trail of bleach around the edges of driveways will stop them but I'd be wary of putting something toxic outside with children playing. Something like essential oils diluted in a watering can might do the trick as well

You'll probably also need to retrain your cats to use the litter box at home and possibly keep them indoors longer to avoid antagonising your neighbour

watchclocker

Obvious wind up

volchitsa

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058367481/neighbour-flinging-cats-poo-into-our-drive

After the comment from another poster about your problems with your previous neighbours I went back to see what that was about, and while it's obviously COMPLETELY different, would you be prepared to consider that maybe your anger, and your wife's anxiety, are a result of all the previous stuff (maybe still ongoing for your daughter) and that you're way overreacting here because of all that rather than because of the present neighbours?

Because I do think you need to rewind a bit here, and accept that you're not the one who's been hard done by, and that even if you think you'd have preferred them to come up and discuss it with you, I'm not entirely certain that you'd have reacted well no matter what.

And your neighbours are perfectly entitled to be annoyed at cat poo in their garden/flowerbeds etc.

I think you're going to bite the bullet and start keeping the cats inside for a while, and work on getting them to use the litter again. That's not very easy once they've got into bad habits IME, but they're very young, so I expect it can be done. One of mine stopped using the litter, and I never got her to be completely reliable again. But she was a lot older.

Maybe it's not changed often enough for them? Or not in a quiet enough place for them? Or just not in a place they always have easy access to?

Two cats can cause an issue too - one cat may not want to use a litter that's being used by another cat.

And most of all, you need to go over to the neighbours and explain that the cats may have been disturbed with the move etc and that you're actively working on how to get them to use the litter more reliably.

HTH

(And I hope your daughter's doing ok now)

Dial Hard

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122579364#Comment_122579364

In fairness (and I appreciate this may be verging on off-topic, but it is relevant to this discussion, imo), the OP's frustration issues and his wife's anxiety both seem to predate their issues with the previous neighbours.

ForestFire

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122579317#Comment_122579317

It's a very serious matter, and I ,for one, am fully on board with this discussion….

Unless of course the Cat or the Poo ends up down in the Garda station for a voluntary PSV examination for a week, and we are trying to get it back!!!😊

macmurchu

Woah...

Given your troubles with the neighbours in your previous home, and the hope of a fresh start,

Sexual assault against a kid is a bit different. Jesus.

macmurchu

Points taken, thanks all.

I completely agree that my pets are at fault and I need to act on it. They are being rehomed tomorrow and I fully knew before writing the original post that it was my responsibility.

I wanted to ask the wider world if the guys tactics were out of hand and should he have just come to me and said here bud I've got a problem with your cats in my garden. Id have gone over and picked it up myself no worries. It's his approach that fucked me off. Apparently it's an accepted tactic, fair enough and I'll learn from it and take that one on the chin.

On the topic, I went over to apologize and say to the guy the cats are being rehomed, if there's any kind of issues in future could you please come to me instead of doing that? Got squared up to and fucked out of it. Apparently this guy has done this to several other neighbours and make their kids cry, and when asked about it got aggressive.

I agree with his problem with me and my pets, not with his approach

macmurchu

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122579205#Comment_122579205

The mud wasn't hard to spot

would it help to talk to someone professionally op, you sound like you need some support

con___manx1

You should be happy all he is doing is putting the poop in your garden. Plenty of wild bird lovers out there that hate cats. Could easy poison them. I don't like cats myself. Found a beautiful gold finch in my garden brutally murderd by the neighbours cat only a few weeks back. In newzeland they are culling cats because the native bird the kiwi is nearly extinct.

volchitsa

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122579643#Comment_122579643

I think rehoming them is a bit tough, unless that's what you already wanted to do. Are the kids not distraught? That said, cats sometimes abandon homes where there are small children, so maybe it's not the worst solution either.

As another poster said, neighbours that poison pets are not that uncommon either. Either that or we're just unlucky to have a multirecidivist near us, because I've heard of several people who've had cats poisoned, and one (who lets his (small, inoffensive) dog out unaccompanied, yes I know you're not supposed to, but it's not my dog!) says the dog was once given something by someone too.

DBB

Trying really hard not to say what i really think, this thread has run its course.

Thanks,

DBB