What make a good husband?

Two situations I have seen recently.

one a man and his partner or wife with their baby and his mother-in-law he was young looked under 30, he was so patient and kind with the screaming baby helping his wife and his mother-in-law with luggage and bags he made sure they were all sorted cheerful good-humored and contented.

The second we were near them for about 30 minutes, he left his wife to try and cope with two toddlers while sorting himself when one of the toddlers pulled out of his he moved him back to his mother who was patiently trying to talk to the children and include him he had no interested, radiated irritation and contempt at his wife but mostly contempt.

Contempt is a killer in any relationship.

How can people be so different?

Jim_Hodge

The world's made of all sorts. Good husbands and bad husbands, good wives and bad wives, good teachers bad teachers, good bosses bad bosses, good politicians bad politicians, good drivers bad drivers…. The list is endless and reasons infinite.

Is this a joke? This will not end well.

How do you know both men where the father? Did you ID them?

buried

Why can't ye all do just like E.T. said and "beee Good", what's wrong with ye

Leg End Reject

A good partner is one you're compatible with personality wise and sexually, share the same outlook and hopes, and have a similar sense of humour.

A snapshot into a brief period of somebody else's life doesn't tell you much, the first man could have been on his best behaviour in public/in front of his mother in law but be an asshole at home, the second could just have had the day from hell. None of us are at our best 24/7.

ahnowbrowncow

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122055209#Comment_122055209

Helps them find it?

Alexus25

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058348478/what-make-a-good-husband

Screenshot Moment, taken out of context potentially

SuperBowserWorld

... could be a million reasons why the first guy is content and the second not ...

Deja Boo

Which is your question - "what makes a good husband?" or "how can people be so different?"

1. Goodness, not unlike beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. For me, goodness is as goodness does.
2. People, experience, nurture v nature, circumstances, tolerance and maturity levels (etc etc) are all different, look around.

con747

How do you know it was his mother-in-law? Or even his kid? Or even his partner/wife? Same goes for the people in part 2 of your post, how do you know what they were to each other?

Pauliedragon

You need to stop making assumptions about people going about their daily business op it's a bit creepy.

Everyone is correct it was only a snapshot.

My husband who's is not give to my flights of fancy said to me regarding the second guy he's an a/hole and that was that.

Most people are trying their best.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122055571#Comment_122055571

Why would I do that people watching is a great hobbie.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122055757#Comment_122055757

Your husband sounds very judgmental. Not a good trait in a person

mykrodot

OP you need to learn how to use punctuation when you're writing. There isn't one in that entire post except the final question mark.

I'm just wondering what age you are? Life teaches you a lot, especially not to judge a situation you know nothing about. End of

Quantum Erasure

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122055916#Comment_122055916

Maybe he was having a bad day...

pgj2015

Maybe the second guys wife was always cheating on him? or making fun of him in front of others, spending all their money on drink and gambling.

randd1

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058348478/what-make-a-good-husband

And when they go home, the first lad slaps the wife a few times for not doing more in public and warns her not to tell anyone. Tells her to make dinner and make it nice and put the kids to be because he's watching the match on the telly with a few cans.

The second lad says sorry to his wife for being in a bad mood, something at work was bothering him and he didn't mean to be snappy, he'll make dinner and put the kids to bed and she can sit down and relax watching the telly, and then sits down with her and watches her programme with her snuggled into him when they're done.

You just don't know after a few seconds of noticing.

Deja Boo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122056327#Comment_122056327

You make an excellent point. Public persona "performances" v. private behavior - can be quite disparate. Been there, lived through it.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122055934#Comment_122055934

perhaps. Why then does his wife post **** judgemental comments of others on the internet?

raspberrypi67

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122055181#Comment_122055181

don't think theres any good politicians🤣

El_Duderino 09

The nit-picking is disappointing. OP saw some things that prompted them to start a thread.

I'd say the main thing that makes a good husband (or partner generally) is being a good teammate to your partner. People can set up their team any way they want. Some focus on one partner's career, and the other focuses on the home life, some focus on a more equal division of labour. Whatever way you set up your team, the important thing is to do your role well.

I'd say some other aspects are a bit less tangible but very important like being caring and listening. Seeing when your partner is having a p1sser of a day and lightening their load by taking on some of their jobs.

Its a lot to do with working together to get everything that needs to be done, done so you can enjoy yourselves. Trying to have a sense of humour as you go about the mundane stuff is helpful.

BraveDonut

Your question should be "What makes a good person?"… being a husband has nothing to do with it

witchgirl26

OP you can't tell anything about whether the first or second man in those scenarios is good or not as a husband or father. Both could be. Or neither could be. Or a mix. It's too short of a snapshot to actually tell. The father in the first could have been on his best behaviour because his mother or mother in law is there. Or they're out in public so he's trying to show he's good. Or he fecked it up before & has learnt to help more. The second could have had a really terrible day. He could have been dealing with tantrums from the toddlers before this & needed to step away & allow the mam to do it this time. Or he's being a bit of an arse but will apologise for it later.

What makes a good partner is not someone who always presents a perfect face & does the right thing all the time, but someone who can admit to their mistakes & try to fix them. Someone who works with their partner rather than against them for their future. Doesn't have to be more complicated than that.

Boggles

https://www.sundayworld.com/lifestyle/real-life/man-with-biggest-penis-in-the-uk-reveals-how-he-was-once-kicked-out-of-yoga-class/a1932433968.html

He'd bate a donkey out of a quarry with it!