Where do you make new friends?

CWMMC

I'm now 28 years old and I have no friends basically. I go to work every day in an office which is mainly female dominated (25 women to 3 men) which the 3 men are over the age of 50 with families and their own lives. I do go to the pub a fair bit which I'll chat to the lads/locals down there but I would never meet them outside the pub or talk/text them apart from that. I'm trying to start getting more friends now that its a new year and all the blabla but I dont even know where to start. Where abouts do you meet friends?

taxAHcruel

It has always tended to happen naturally for me when I was involved in things that I was personally interested in. If you get active in things you have a passion for, and those things involve other people, then often forming friendships just happens on its own. Or with a small amount of effort.

For example I have done a lot of Jujitsu over the past 15+ years. The more I trained the more I got interested in competition. So in the beginning when here was competition on - or when eventually I started competing myself - I would talk to the others in the club about my intention to travel to the competition. Ask them if they wanted to come with me for the car ride and make a day of it. Friendships simply formed over time of doing things like that.

But if you are sitting around at home or just going to the pub all the time - I do not really know any techniques for forming friendships. I do not know if there are apps like Tinder for platonic friendship forming? They all appear to be for dating or sex? Perhaps there is some. I do not know of them however.

For me therefore I'd just figure out what you are into and do more of it - and do it as consistently and as socially as you possibly can. So step 1 is figuring out what it is you are into at the moment - or if there is nothing but the pub and the couch then figure out new things to be interested in and pursue.

zg3409

Join clubs you have an interest in.

bogmanfan

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121618609#Comment_121618609

This 100%. Whatever hobbies you have, chances are there is a club full of like-minded people near you. Golf clubs, cycling, tennis, GAA. If you're a regular in a pub, there's probably a golf society or a darts/pool team. There are photography and art clubs all over the country, if sport isn't your thing. Try group music lessons. Honestly, there are so many ways to meet people these days if you're willing to be open-minded and pushed slightly out of your comfort zone.

iptba

Wasn’t sure where to post this. The discussion on men’s friendship groups was closed:

‘Men should be given the choice to be cared for at home’: the big issues at a men’s shed as an election looms

Members of Naas Men’s Shed give their thoughts on home care, GP wait times, downsizing, the environment and crime https://www.irishtimes.com/ireland/2024/10/24/men-should-be-given-the-choice-to-be-cared-for-at-home-the-big-issues-at-a-mens-shed-as-an-election-looms

con___manx1

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058331369/where-do-you-make-new-friends

A hobbie would be the best way to make friends. Golf is a very social sport. Hiking is a good one to. There is organised group hikes for certain age groups you can find online.

iptba

Keepy-uppies: We need to talk about maintaining male friendships

A man’s social circle often dwindles between his mid-20s to early 30s when he meets a life partner. But maintaining connections with old mates and making new ones can improve mental health, whether it’s having a drink at the local pub, watching a game together, or playing five-a-side soccer

https://www.irishexaminer.com/lifestyle/healthandwellbeing/arid-41516633.html

StevenToast

Im at the stage in my life where i am getting rid of old friends and making no new friends....

Its great....

ancapailldorcha

Mod: Some non-constructive posts have been removed.

Luker

Meetup.com is good for joining groups and making friends. Good luck op

CWMMC

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122877649#Comment_122877649

Unfortunately in my area (Co. Wexford) meetup.com isn't used, which there is two to three groups which are active, but they meet up during the week when I am working (normally at 11 on a Tuesday morning etc)

taxAHcruel

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/122881071#Comment_122881071

How sure are you of that? I just put Wexford in and the top results were:

1. One group Making friends - Mostly Saturday and Sunday meet ups
2. One group Social walking - Mostly Sundays
3. One group making Coffee and Chat - Mostly Sundays
4. One group doing Wellness walks - alternating between Thursday morning and Tuesday late evening

If you throw Enniscorthy and Gorey into the mix - which are attainable distances from wexford town - there are quite a few more. And the ones meeting up partially or exclusively during weekday office hours is next to none so I am not seeing where your "during the week mostly at 11 on a tuesday" thing is coming from? Are you specifically in a remote corner of wexford?

Outside Meetup I see there are poetry nights in something called Red Books? And another guy who runs a "horror movie night" too. Hell there is even a burlesque and drama group. I see also some mention of a boards game and magic the gathering/pokemon group. And all this I found in only 30 seconds on google. It took longer to type this paragraph to you, than find those results.

All that said though - Groups do not start on Meetup by themselves. It always takes someone to start them. So if you feel there is a dearth of options there - create one/some. Perhaps there are many other people in your area bemoaning the lack of Wexford Options. Someone has to be the spark to light that fire.

If I was stuck down in Wexford myself though - the first things I would do would be join one or more of the local BJJ clubs there - and maybe sign up with that wexford crowd who are involved in volunteer work around protecting and saving adult and baby seals - and probably make use of that new meet up feature in pokemon go - and finally get into something that gets me out of my own head space where it is never healthy to be - archery, shooting, horse riding or sea fishing probably.

It's been 10 months since you started the thread though. What have you been doing or trying or changing or getting after in the last 10 months generally?