Possessions left in our house

greencatkin

Hello

My brother left a number of large items in my parents house around 20 years ago.

He has been asked repeatedly by text to remove the items, or to allow us to dispose of them. He says he wants to keep all of the items but will not collect them or arrange for alternative storage. This has been going on for 10 years.

We do not have a postal address for him.

Is there anything we can do?

How do we resolve this?

Thanks in advance

lmk123

Block him number and burn them

Cushtie

Simple, advise that they can be collected up to a certain date after which time they will be disposed.

bucketybuck

Tell him they are already dumped and see what he does.

elperello

It's an awkward one and you have been patient but if you need the space the stuff has to go.

But then he is your brother.

At least try to speak to him in person and come to an agreement.

Wanderer78

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121556593#Comment_121556593

makes most sense, but i think id just bin the stuff now, hes been warned, repeatedly, for years, but....

Deeec

If you are communicating by text and don't have an address for him then I take it you don't get on anymore and the family are not on friendly terms with him. Are these items of value - if not then just dump them or sell them.

chiefwiggum

Tell him they will be stored from next week down the bottom of the garden with no cover. If he wants them he'll collect them. If he says fine just dump them, he doesn't really want them

Tiger20

Are your parents still alive? Whose house is it now and who is sending him the text? If the text is not from the owner of the house then maybe that is why he is ignoring the text .

Very frustrating situation, from my own family circumstances siblings act in a certain manner and use situations for their own personal power play, deciding what Mam and Dad want (which is really what they want) and trying to exert control over others. Some sort of game may be going on and, easy to say, but from experience try not to get caught up in it and don’t loose your **** over it, rise above it if possible.

greencatkin

My parents have been contacting him, it's their property, and they talk about it a lot to me about how they can't clear their space.

Definitely some sort of power play going on.

Thanks

Ezeoul

Ten years?

As suggested above, contact him once more with a fixed date to collect the stuff by, or its going to the dump.

And do it.

magicbastarder

Send a text saying he has 90 days to arrange collection otherwise it will be assumed he is forfeiting ownership? Could suggest that you are getting quotes to have the house rewired and need to make space and will not be held liable for storage costs for them.

bucketybuck

Why make up stories or excuses? Just grow a pair, tell him the stuff will be dumped and then dump it.

The stuff is 20 years old ffs.

Baybay

Your parents are enabling your sibling to maintain a presence in the house but also seem to expect you to solve the problem. While it’s an issue for them, clearly it isn't a big enough one for them to deal with. For now, this is about a non residential member of the household’s stuff taking up space but if the house needs to be sold or is passed on through inheritance what happens then?

I agree with others who’ve posted, January 31st deadline for removal of items which after that date will be skipped or sold.

Mrs OBumble

Are you living in the house? If not, then butt out. Until your parents die and the house needs to be sold, then it's their problem.

If they moan to you about it, then give them the suggestions in this thread as options. But THEY are the ones who need to decide what to do, and then do it.

Wanderer78

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121556983#Comment_121556983

we have no clue of the health status of the parents, we need to be very careful when assuming this, this situation could be causing great stress for them, and if they have further health issues.....

...this is also called common sense and having compassion for others....

i think id be giving a weeks notice, then its off to local charity shops and/or the tip....

the_pen_turner

order a skip and text him that you are clearing out that room and that if he wants anything in there to have it gone by say the 14th. then take a pic of it in the skip and ask him is he sure he doesnt want this stuff

DoozerT6

"...then take a pic of it in the skip and ask him is he sure he doesnt want this stuff"

Don't do this. He'll say 'yes i DO want that stuff', then you'll have to remove it and he'll leave it there for another 10 years. One of the family contact him with a final collection date, and if it's not collected by then just dump it, tafuq.

CramCycle

As above, give a collection date, 30 days out from now and tell him anything not collected by that date will be sent for charity, recycling or waste disposal. My mother done it to me, not out of badness, theere was just sh1t in my old bedroom that I never thought of. I would have liked to look through it but she just dumped the lot. I am not bitter, should have went and cleaned it up.

the_pen_turner

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121557327#Comment_121557327

you could say no or even come get it yourself. put the owness on him.

DoozerT6

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121557916#Comment_121557916

They've been asking him to come get it for TEN YEARS......

Mrs OBumble

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121557009#Comment_121557009

If that's the case, then the parents need to appoint someone with Power of Attorney to sort it out for them. That person needs to take proper legal advice (ie not from a bunch of bush-lawyers on here), and act according.

If the OP does something without proper legal understanding and basis, they could easily end up in legal trouble AND start a monumental family argument.

the_pen_turner

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558015#Comment_121558015

yes but he would then know that they are in the skip and will be gone if he does nothing.

herbalplants

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558095#Comment_121558095

Are you serious?!! Legal advice for this.

Larbre34

"You have until January 21st to retrieve all of this stuff, or its being disposed of."

That is all. Your responsibility for him and his possessions ended long ago.

Princess Calla

I find it strange your family has your brother's number but not his home address. I presume he has completely cut ties with the family.

Like above I'd give him 30 days to get his stuff, then I'd tell him it's gone (I wouldn't actually dump it for another month or so just to see his reaction)

I don't know I presume he could take a civil case, so if a solicitors letter arrived I'd be contacting the solicitor saying actually we do still have his stuff ,will I arrange it to go to your offices or if you forward his address to his house.

Kaybaykwah

Have SpaceX come take it and add it to their payload, then send him the bill. That should please him.

magicbastarder

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121557384#Comment_121557384

my dad threw out my muddy fox courier comp on me years ago. i am very annoyed about that, but annoyed with myself.

Rubberchikken

Bin it. 10 years fgs and it's an adult that owns this stuff. I've no time for games and power plas or for adults acting like this.

He needs to grow up and cop on.

If the stuff actually meant anything to him he'd have collected it long ago.

And is anyone really concerned about relations worsening. They don't sound too healthy at the moment imo.

bucketybuck

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558320#Comment_121558320

Take a case about what? You think he has receipts for this 20 year old crap? A contract?

Nothing about this is going near a courthouse and the answer remains a very simple one, grow a pair, tell him its getting dumped and then dump it.

Princess Calla

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558513#Comment_121558513

I doubt it would go near a court house myself but it looks like the brother is playing "silly beggars" with the parents.

So I wouldn't put it past him going to a solicitor to "scare" his parents.

At least if they did get a letter, they can say well here's your stuff best of luck.

If the parents don't hear anything after telling him the stuff is dumped....then just dump it.