Married name

whydoibother

For someone who’s married how do you actually change your name to match your spouses? Where do you have to go?

And if someone marries a foreigner, does he/she (the foreigner) need to change their name with the embassy?

stargazer 68

You dont have to go anywhere. You just need to send your marriage cert to your bank etc to change the records.

You need to apply for a new passport, I just waited until my old one expired.

amdublin

Send copy of your marriage to the tax office also

Give your doctor your new name

Just starting using your married name essentially

Ps. My recommendation is that it is more trouble than it is worth. Also an out dated and possessive old thing. If I were you I would not be changing it fwiw

Dial Hard

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058302672/married-name

You don't need to change your name at all.

amdublin

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120774983#Comment_120774983

I am surprised how many women in Ireland still do this. With hindsight, I wish I never did. It was a long time back and I never thought about it enough back then. I wish I did think about it. I miss my old name

Dial Hard

I didn't change mine and it saved me an absolute shıt-tonne of hassle when the marriage ended 😃

I genuinely don't understand how this is still a thing in this day and age. I'm sure the "It just makes life easier" brigade will be along shortly but my brother's five children have three different surnames between them* and it has yet to cause a single issue while travelling, etc.

*For the nosy amongst us:

Eldest two just have their mum's surname

Middle one is double-barrelled

Youngest two just have his surname

the_amazing_raisin

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058302672/married-name

You don't actually change your name, you're married as individuals and can choose to use your partner's surname. That's why it has your maiden names on the marriage cert

What you change is entirely up to you, you aren't obligated to change anything and can continue to use your maiden name where convenient. I've know people who keep their maiden name for work because they don't want to generate confusion

Incidentally, there's no rule that says you need to take the husbands name for a heterosexual marriage. The man can adopt his wife's surname if he wants

Side note, I wonder what gay and lesbian marriages do, flip a coin or just pick who has the more awesome surname 🤔

In terms of getting stuff changed, it depends on the institution. Most banks or utilities will change it by presenting a copy of the marriage cert plus a signed letter to update your details

If you're changing utility company, you don't even need to present the marriage cert, just use whatever name suits you on the new application

For passports, driver's license and social services cards, there's usually pretty clear instructions on the respective websites.

I believe for passports you're effectively replacing the passport and will have to pay for a new one. You'll need to send in the marriage cert (original, not a copy) with the application

One thing I'll say about the passport, it may be useful to use the same surname as any kids you have, whether they're yours or your partner's. Obviously it's a lot more common these days that unmarried couples will have children, but I have heard of mothers getting extra checks going through passport control when their surname on their passport is different to their child's

L1011

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120775111#Comment_120775111

A friends mother has started using her maiden name again after 40 years. She is still happily married, she just decided she preferred her original name. As name is by repute in Ireland you could just start back.

Bicyclette

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120779952#Comment_120779952

I was forced to take my husband's name and PPS number when I got married almost 40 years ago. Thankfully those days are gone now. But over the years I started to go double barreled. Changed my passport, bank accounts, tax name (and got my old PPSN back 😃) I finally changed my driving licence this year - and there wasn't an issue. The only thing still in my married name is my credit card - but its a joint credit card and he pays the bill so I'm not in the least bit concerned about that. I'm much happier with the double barreled name. My Mum uses her maiden name and married name as double barreled too. She too changed after a couple of decades of marriage. Never had any issues.

Glittering_Fault_720

[quote]The man can adopt his wife's surname if he wants.[/quote]

I did this. It caused problems at the passport office. Had to go to the top to make them accept that a male can change names on marriage.

the_amazing_raisin

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120800364#Comment_120800364

I don't know anyone who has done it personally, but I remember reading an article about a guy who did it in the UK (hence my reason for posting)

Apparently he got in a load of trouble with his family because they were insulted that he didn't keep their name alive. They weren't speaking afterwards

Says a lot about our culture that we're still clinging on to the idea of the son carrying on the family name

From your own experience it's pretty obvious that the majority of our social services probably aren't setup to handle a man taking his wife's family name

Jim2007

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058302672/married-name

This sounds like a more complex question than it looks at first glance.... you need to tells us exactly which country you are talking about because the rules are different and the sequence in which have to do it is important as well.

In common law jurisdictions like Ireland and the UK, you just tell people and if necessary show a copy of your wedding certificate. But in civil law countries like most of Europe in fact you need to got through a legal process, which usually happens when you are married there. Otherwise you need to contact their embassy and find out what is needed.

In civil law countries you can have a wide variety of options from both partners keeping their own name, both partners taking one name and each partner keeping their own name but the family name being a double barrelled one and the kids taking the double barrelled one. My advice would be to go slowly and make sure you do things in the correct order, I know of a French person and an Italian person who got themselves into very big messes because they rushed through the process.

Citygirl1

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120800364#Comment_120800364

Prince Philip was forced to do this after the Queen ascended the throne in 1952, so don't think any English institutions could object to one doing so now 😀.

XLR 8

Odd fact but all surnames have always been connected to men. Women as daughters have the fathers surname just as their mothers had their fathers and so on.

Marcusm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120823762#Comment_120823762

That’s not true. He had previously adopted “Mountbatten” as a surname in tribute to his maternal uncle. It was decided that it would not be the House of Mountbatten but remain the House of Windsor (adopted during WWI to replace Saxe-Coburg Gotha) and minor royals would adopt the surname “Mountbatten-Windsor”. His original “surname” would have been Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glucksberg reflecting the Danish origins of his paternal grandfather.

TooTired123

I’m interested to hear which specific bodies in Ireland argued about a change in name if you had evidence to prove usage.

Peregrinus

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120826083#Comment_120826083

I've heard that the passport office are quite picky if you want to renew your passport but in a different name. Unless your change of name was occasioned by marriage, which is straightforward, they want a lot of evidence that you are actually using your new name, and have been for some time.

amdublin

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120779989#Comment_120779989

Who forced you? :(

Bicyclette

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120836747#Comment_120836747

Back in the bad old days, once a woman got married she automatically assumed her husband's name and was given her husband's PPSN with a "W" at the end. The PPSN was associated with my husband therefore the name on work related stuff had to be his surname. Thankfully this has all changed now.

Claw Hammer

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120837964#Comment_120837964

It wasn't the PPSN that time it was the RSI number. There were a lot of problems with the added W. After a divorce and remarriage the second wife got the same number as the first wife.

The big driver for change was that an extra digit was needed for the numbers. The computers were all set up for 7 digits and two letters. In order to get 8 digits the second letter was dropped and 8 digits and one letter would fit where there had previously been 7 digits and 2 letters.

L1011

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120840412#Comment_120840412

The time period when W numbers were still being issued (to women marrying who had never been issued their own number, prior to 2000) and divorce being legal (1995) can't have turned up that many cases. One is enough to cause mayhem of course

whydoibother

Complicated indeed

Claw Hammer

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120840978#Comment_120840978

There were foreign divorces, death and re-marriages, and annulments.

amdublin

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120837964#Comment_120837964

Eeek! Bad old days indeed

amdublin

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120840412#Comment_120840412

What the heck! This all sounds crazy doesn't it!

Claw Hammer

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120842288#Comment_120842288

It was a consequence of the move to computerisation that problems began. Originally Social Welfare records and taxes were kept separately. Every worker had an insurance card which was stamped weekly and there was a card for every year which was retained by Social Welfare. When someone claimed benefits the card was checked. taxes were paid annually and husband and wifes incomes were aggregated. It didn't matter if two women shared the same tax number at different times. In 1978 the PAYE number became the RSI number and the social welfare numbers were discontinued with the stamps becomein known as PRSI contributions. Now when someone claims a social welfare benefit the computer records have to be checked. That is when all the trouble with W on the end of RSI numbers started. In the arly yaers both Social Welfare and Revenue were issuing RSI numbers with the result that some people got more than one RSI number.

Bicyclette

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120840978#Comment_120840978

I had my own RSI/PPSN before I was married. I was then informed that I could no longer use my own number and had to use my husband's number, with a W at the end of it. When I did get my own number, it was the same number that I had before I was married.

billgibney

All the women whinging about using a man's name when they already use a man's name, their fathers ;)

Dial Hard

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120882989#Comment_120882989

You realise why that is, right?

whydoibother

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120882989#Comment_120882989

I wonder what surname I’d have now if it was the other way around! My god, I’d have to do so much research beyond my great grandmother who was actually born in Spain!