Drinking alone in a Pub

c.p.w.g.w

So I'm new enough to a village(living here 15 months really)

Came out with friends out of village who went home early ...who went home early)

And from half of the pub goers I am being looked as some sort of sub human, and by the others as normal(including the owner in fairness)

Is this the normal thing in rural area's?

igCorcaigh

It's not New York, I take it?

silliussoddius

Stay of the moors.

Strumms

Lots of people do it…. Monday night would be a great night in our local and a lot of men who’d be in with family or friends maybe Saturday or Thursday / Friday would come in, buy a newspaper and chill, was a great relaxed atmosphere on Mondays… the barman and junior manager that worked Monday were both off on Tuesday one was a single fella and the other I didn’t know well but they let’s say let last orders and drinking up time drift… they’re doing the cleanup with their own pints tucked behind the pillar….last orders called at around 23.55, 00.40 was the cutoff to be out , you had to be gone by then or you’d be getting abuse…hardcore “ you cuñts are taking advantage of my good nature now fück off ! “

If there was nobody around it wouldn’t deter me as there was a nice friendly atmosphere… aside from the final warning ….on the odd work trip also, a bar is a hell of a lot more relaxing then stuck in your room….

Are you a bloke? Then you're grand. I think...

I'm actually confused tbh about a taxi I had leaving the house where he was able to tell me an awful lot about myself? Weird right!

igCorcaigh

Rural people tend to be strange and cagey. Don't let 'em put you off. Strike up a conversation. It's important to get know the locals.

I love having a few pints on my own, even when I lived in Athlone!

bassy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120648993#Comment_120648993

All alone in Athlone lol

maninasia

Athlone isnt rural though.

Small villages are something else.

Perfectly normal.

You get the few gazes from the regulars but that's about it. Eventually you become one of them.

I'd love to do it.

Schwiiing

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120649019#Comment_120649019

You'll never become ''one of them''. The OP will always be a 'blow-in'. Rural Irish villages are as tight, cagey and inbred as it gets. Your business is everyone's business. Gossip is better than hard currency. Certain GAA families only marry other known GAA families especially if their name is famous.

Citizen Six

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120648966#Comment_120648966

..

Count Dracula

They probably don't know what brigade you are in and are waiting for intel from the AC.

It happens pilgrim.

Culchies have a habit of letting the whole parish down, they are obsessed with being cuter than each other and if that means sacrificing a cead mile failte, in exchange for gormless oneupmanship and intangible clique loyalty, well then so be it. Local Pubs inevitably end up as bad as Coronation street, full of rumour and rancid pretentiousness, most alcoholics actually believe that being a Bar fly is a worthwhile lifestyle choice........ I know it is astonishing.

The irony is that no one down the pub will even put the poor chunts wide to the truth of it, the irony.

corner of hells

An uncle of mine drank alone for years in his local every Monday night we’ll into his 70s , all the clientele were of that age group.You had your own barstool ,each man alone in his thoughts reading his paper enjoying a smoke in peace.

As time passed and a drinker shuffled of his mortal coil moving on to meet his creator a new man entered the group with the remaining men being offered the choice of his barstool moving up the ranks so to speak.This was a bar with no lounge staff or television.

Eventually my uncle passed and a group of these men and the landlord attended his funeral.

Years later my cousin bought the pub with notions of renovating it .One winter’s night as he was cleaning up with all the staff and customers gone home he heard the rustle of a newspaper’s and got the smell of cigarettes, he looked up and in the reflection of the mirrors behind the bar he saw the images of a group of elderly men with their pints and newspapers in the bar watching him. As he turned round all the men were gone.

Taking this as warning he abandoned his plan to renovate the pub and keeps Monday night for elderly men to enjoy their pint and solitude.

Dial Hard

Small rural towns can be quite insular alright. You could live there for 40 years and still be "Yer man from above in X".

As for going for a solo drink, I don't think anyone could care less. I'm a chick and would often go and have a drink alone while I'm waiting to meet someone or have half an hour to kill before something. You do get the odd person (usually men of a certain vintage) who think you must be only dying for someone to come and rescue you from your own company but most people don't bat an eyelid.

cj maxx

Country boy born and raised and most people would go to the pub alone here.

bsloepro

nought wrong with it at all - sometimes you can get that feeling you’re out of place and it sinks in that you’re sitting in some regulars “spot”

chosen1

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120649839#Comment_120649839

These kind of threads always bring out the type that think that rural Ireland is some sort of equivalent to Deliverance and all the locals will be scheming to get them.

I can't speak for all places, but your typical rural area these days have people from all over, mixed in with people who can trace their lineage back generations and the pubs in these places generally reflect that. Anywhere like this that I know well, everyone tends to get along and there is no us and them mentality.

Do gossipers exist? Of course they do but the other locals will quickly make you aware of their ways and you know to be wary what you saying to them. Thankfully they're a minority.

I've lived and visited several different areas over both rural and urban Ireland and the reality is that there is no big divide between the two. A few drinks in the bar and any initial cageyness is forgotten.

dartboardio

I am a woman and would happily go and drink in a bar alone.. I am fond of drink though so maybe that's why I wouldn't really care. I would generally stick in my own thoughts though or read a book or have a chat with the bar staff.

artanevilla

The whole point of sitting at the bar is so you don't have to talk to people. Eyes forward.

tesla_newbie

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120649019#Comment_120649019

until you have three generations of you’re people buried in the local graveyard, you are a blow in in rural parishes

Gregor Samsa

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120653083#Comment_120653083

I've moved around a lot, and it's such a hassle exhuming all those corpses and bringing them with you every time just to fit in.

Andrea B.

Nothing wrong with few pints at a bar solo.

Sad though when it goes beyond and watching the solo drinker falling out to the Jax.

o1s1n

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120651307#Comment_120651307

My grandparents have a second house in a small town in Wicklow that they in live Friday through Sunday. They've been doing that for I'd say at least 50 years now, everyone knows them - but they're still seen as Dublin blow ins 😁

niallpatrick

I've only had a few problems but generally you're left alone in a hamlet or in town, leave my fishing gear outside sit read a book inside theres a fresh pint on the table. One tiny problem in a tiny hamlet, I went up to the bar lady sat at the bar on her own started telling me her life story and hinted she'd like me to buy her a drink, I don't cause problems especially in rural areas I love so best not. She was hitting on me and she was a local school teacher divorced on her own. As tempted as I was you don't poo where you sleep.

There is a well known bar in Belfast where a lady on her own would best not to interact with a certain bar fly, real ladies man in his head but the reality is he's a pest. A gentleman asks a lady if she'd like a drink the lady replies no thanks or I'm waiting for a friend you wish her a good evening and go back to your own business but he doesn't. I've seen him literally beg a woman to have a drink with him where she had to get bar staff to warn him.

Never hesitate to have bar staff or bouncers made aware of any problem, don't tackle it yourself.

Doing it right now, though it's 8pm where I am and no work tomorrow. Will meet a couple of friends later but will happily sit and sip on a pint by myself.

Scipri0

I would like to do it more but i'd feel a bit too self-conscious which is a shame as there's sometimes that i'd be by myself and i'd love to headout. I'm a guy.

Strumms

The Oak on Dame St… if i didn’t have the car that’s where I’d pop in for one or two on my way home in days gone by

Excellently ran pub, comfortable, unique decor, staff are always very friendly, efficient yet unobtrusive….

Dial Hard

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120658355#Comment_120658355

Go for it. Nobody cares, genuinely. Bring a paper/book if you're a bit self-conscious.

Andrea B.

Many years ago, friend was painting in central Copenhagen.

In painting gear, popped in to top class looking pub for quiet beer at counter.

Only one other discerning gentleman at counter reading paper.

Friend pulled over "complimentary" bowl of nuts from gentleman and scoffed them.

Gentleman awkwardly finished drink and left.

Friend pointed to dickiebowed barman for refill of "complimentary" bowl.

Barman filled and handed him docket for a payment of 30 kr.

brokenbad

Locals in rural pubs do tend to treat strangers with a degree of suspicion....i always think of Clint Eastwood type scenarios when he enters a Saloon....

The demographic of rural pubs tends to be made up of GAA heads and Non GAA heads who migrate to the pool table for solace......i fall into the latter category.

I am a blow in to the local area (7 years and counting) and go to the local pub alone once or twice a month...at the beginning it can be hard to integrate yourself with the locals but all it takes is to strike up a conversation with one or two fellas at the bar to break the ice - you have to initiate it though.

Luckily enough i am fairly handy at playing pool and the local pub has a decent pool table which generates quite a few competitions - that was my intro to the locals - after a few months you are on first name terms with the barman and no longer feel like Clint Eastwood when he walks into the Saloon....

Scipri0

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120658725#Comment_120658725

I probably should some time. Cheers!

BraveDonut

Can't understand why anyone would feel self conscious. If someone thinks its strange, then they have a problem - not you.

Enjoy your pint and your paper/book. If you want to talk to others, do! If you don't, they'll get the message soon enough

castletownman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120663836#Comment_120663836

Yeah its strange.

Someone could have a bite to eat in a restaurant, sit down for a coffee in a cafe, go to the cinema or a match, hell even holiday abroad, by themselves and no-one would bat an eyelid, and the person doing so wouldn't think anything of it. But flying solo to a pub is seen as almost taboo? Don't get it.

I actually prefer going to the pub alone. It's 'me time'. I can drink at my own pace, can choose to engage in conversation if I want to (I am not one for small talk for the sake of it), and am very unlikely to be dragged into a round or an extended session. In fact, one of my pleasures in life is arriving in an unfamiliar town/city and finding a decent pub to unwind in with a couple of pints. Will be doing so this weekend actually (until the wife joins me and starts talking shite 😂)

o1s1n

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120664711#Comment_120664711

You'd be surprised how many folks wouldn't eat in a restaurant, go to the cinema, a gig or a pub alone. They're definitely missing out!

I know someone who won't even walk into a pub on her own and I've to go out to meet her as she'd be 'too embarrassed to walk in alone'.

BaywatchHQ

I go everywhere alone as I am a loner. For example I have been to 23 concerts alone. Loner men are easy targets for people to insult and laugh at for example the cretin in my last event who had a go at me for supposedly queuing too close to his girlfriend. If I was standing in a group he wouldn't have had a go at me but as a lone man people aren't afraid to flex on you.

I also remember a girl laughing at me and saying I had no friends when I walked into an outdoor concert alone. It is funny that these wretched creatures always say how people should be independent yet they make fun of a loner man who is being independent.

Scipri0

I have no problems going to the cinema by myself but maybe ye are right and it's all in my head when it comes to pubs.

o1s1n

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120667230#Comment_120667230

Fairly sure that's all made up or you're just incredibly paranoid.

Nobody would even notice you were alone at a gig as the whole venue is full of people walking around on their own to and from toilets/smoking areas/ bars.

I see sheep

I'm a blow in where I live currently and there are as many positives as negatives.

You're carrying no negative baggage - so unless you **** up and do something stupid nobody is going to think negatively of you.

And people are interested in you because you're not the same auld head they've been looking at for 30 years.

And it's interesting getting to know new people.

You're obviously not going to know everyone or 'get' all the jokes etc.

I see both sides as I'm 'a local' when I go back visiting where I'm from.

As mentioned above there's positives and negatives with being 'a local' too.

I've no problem going to the pub in my new village by myself.

Loafing Oaf

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120663836#Comment_120663836

Yeah when I was living in D4 one of my big pleasures was going on my own to one of the big spacious locals like the 51 or the Waterloo to watch a match and read the paper. Didn't even want the drink particularly but obviously...IIRC nobody ever tried to engage me in chat so I must be adept at sending out the right signals...

Cromuli

This is a local pub (as well) for local people.

ancapailldorcha

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120665783#Comment_120665783

I'd be one of those. I can easily go to the cinema alone but when it comes to pubs and restaurants, it's a bit depressing seeing everyone coupled up or in groups. There's also the expense. I do go to restaurants but only when abroad. Just feels a bit odd when I'm at home.

Neames

I live in a rural spot. One of the things I enjoy most is wandering into the local pub early Friday evening. There's generally a good mix of people there flying solo and we all chat away together and have a good laugh. No one talks about work, investments, cost of living, nothing serious. The funny thing is although we all get on even though we come from all backgrounds, age groups etc We look like a very odd bunch of people to onlookers. We're friendly with each other without all the serious talk that goes with friends - how's the family, how's the new job going etc.

Baasterd

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120677207#Comment_120677207

Sure that sounds like the definition of a great local. I have a similar spot, solid cast of mostly lone guys as locals but a few couples as well, run by a young couple that know their beer. So its like an old mans local but its popular with a younger crowd as well. Great spot engage as much or as little as you like with the chat always a friendly welcome and a cracking pint, no food and no kids as well 😊

gameoverdude

Get a kindle.