Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Are Adult males being victimised in these days?

Options
  • 04-03-2023 10:12am
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 798 ✭✭✭Relax brah


    We have seen some awful news stories of violence/murder towards women in recent years on our beautiful island that NO ONE can stand over, excuse or justify (by any means.)

    In the last 12 to 18 months I myself (as a male) am becoming increasingly uncomfortable walking through my local park. Daily (it used to be twice daily) - I go for a walk before work around my local park. I listen to a podcast, sometimes call some friends and clear my head before the day ahead.

    I am always friendly, I never stop and talk to people unless I know them but I will always make the effort to smile and say “good morning” at the very least. These days however, I’ve noticed that women look the other way or just ignore me - men are absolutely pleasant and fine with it. This is a well known public park, that is only ever bright when I walk with a really strong community feel (or at least it used to.)

    I have felt it has become rather demeaning.

    Has anyone else noticed this?

    DISCLAIMER: I am not trying to cause any conflict here. I want a healthy debate and nothing more, as this is genuinely is hurting me. Mods please delete if you feel inappropriate

    Thanks

    Post edited by Boards.ie: Mike on


«13456

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 3,421 ✭✭✭francois


    No



  • Registered Users Posts: 903 ✭✭✭thegame983


    Women are more loving, but men are sounder.



  • Registered Users Posts: 5,350 ✭✭✭Augme


    So having seen the awful stories in the news of violence/murder towards women you then proceed to say smile and aay "good morning" to every women you come across on your early morning walks in the park? Lol, not the sharpest knife in the drawer some might say.



  • Registered Users Posts: 5,837 ✭✭✭Princess Calla


    You have to remember that some women have been fielding a lot of unwanted attention from men/boys from a very young age. Especially if they developed early etc. Tbh it can wear you down , to the point that even the simplest interaction can feel like you're being hit on. (That's not massive ego or vanity , just some girls receive an awful lot of attention)

    Tbh if I'm in a park on my own I certainly wouldn't be engaging on any level with an unknown man.

    Again we've been thought from a very young age to be aware of our surroundings ,tuck hair in when walking home at night so it can't be easily grabbed, hold your keys in your hand (not sure how much good it will do but anyway) walk in centre of road if path has bushes etc.



  • Registered Users Posts: 798 ✭✭✭Relax brah


    I don’t know where you have grown up but where I live (and have grown up for 40+ years) it’s always been the way. I don’t stop at every person and say hello, it’s a courteous thing to say good morning to someone if it makes sense. For many it can brighten up there day - if I was wearing a scream mask and jumping into someone’s face then that’s a different story obviously.

    Your post childish and rather defensive, there is no need for a personal jab. This is a discussion. If you require more context just ask - following that maybe we can see who is “the sharpest knife in the drawer.”



  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 7,699 ✭✭✭StupidLikeAFox


    Is this your definition of being victimised? I was expecting an argument like "men get attacked too but don't get the coverage" or something like that - but if you feel victimised because you are not getting a nod on your morning walk you don't really have much to worry about



  • Registered Users Posts: 862 ✭✭✭redlough


    I don't understand how it is hurting you that total strangers don't say hello

    The World has changed in the last 30 years. Life is busier, people are busier. Especially in cities.

    I don't see why people minding their own business, men or women, should feel the need to say Hello to a stranger just in case they are hurting their feeling.

    I expect you live in a city, if you really want people to say hello then move to countryside village/town and you will have a different experience.



  • Registered Users Posts: 5,350 ✭✭✭Augme



    You talk about feeling victimised as a male and "becoming increasingly uncomfortable walking through my local park" because women won't respond positively to your smile and "good morning" comment when you walk past them in the park. My first, and still is, reaction is that this must be a troll.


    Also, some randomer smiling and saying good morning doesn't brighten up anyones day as much as you'd hope it would.



  • Registered Users Posts: 20,078 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    The world has changed, OP. People are more cautious of strangers precisely because of the murders and attacks you allude to in you're post.

    You jusy need to roll with the times and not expect everyone else to hold the same standards of politeness as you. Some people want to be left alone on their walk through the park. So they probably consider what you're doing, impolite.

    But that's the level we're talking about. It's a matter of a difference of opinion on politeness rather than victimisation of men.



  • Registered Users Posts: 23,695 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack



    Has anyone else noticed this?


    I can’t say I have to be honest. When I’m walking to work about 8 in the morning there’s a few morning joggers or other people heading to work and if they say good morning or whatever I’d say it back, but I don’t expect anyone to say it because I know they’ve got as much going on in their heads as I do where I wouldn’t even notice other people.

    I thought you were going to suggest men were victims of muggers or assault or something (there are the odd early bird thieves about too), but a victim in the sense that people don’t greet you like they used to? It’s a stretch to use the word victim in that context. I thought hearing stories of assault and thinking you were going to be next was what made you uncomfortable. Women not saying hello to you though? That doesn’t make men victims, that’s just normal.

    Truth be told in spite of the many news stories there have been in recent years, it doesn’t put women off being out on their own, which is a good thing because I imagine hearing those kinda stories constantly would be bound to make at least some women paranoid. Doesn’t seem so, which is good, because they’re just going about their day like everyone else.



  • Advertisement
  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    You're just not making strong enough eye contact. Like, try really eyeballing them as you say "Good morning".



  • Registered Users Posts: 28,214 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    YOU are uncomfortable because you go through your local park greeting everyone despite evidence that this greeting is not always welcomed.

    So. Just. Stop. Doing. It.



  • Registered Users Posts: 30,356 ✭✭✭✭freshpopcorn


    I'm disappointed the regulars who have a thing for balding middle aged angry men haven't shown up yet!



  • Registered Users Posts: 41,017 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • Registered Users Posts: 41,017 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    🤣🤣🤣

    Most of the outrage porn "footage" on social media is fake. Its often from different countries. It often makes claims that never happened. Its all a fake racist narrative to paint all foreign men as rapists and paedophiles.

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • Registered Users Posts: 30,356 ✭✭✭✭freshpopcorn


    To be honest OP most people who ignore you when you say hello, hold a door, leave them cross the road, give way in traffic, etc. Don't think your rapist. They either have other things on their mind or generally just snotty people.



  • Registered Users Posts: 8,304 ✭✭✭FintanMcluskey


    The fact your in Ireland explains a lot. Irish women are the most unfriendly species on the planet.

    I travel a lot for work and I'm shocked how friendly women in the UK & abroad are in comparison.



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats



    Might be convenient for you they sound English but Limerick & District isn’t even an insurance brokers. It is for you though



  • Registered Users Posts: 16,584 ✭✭✭✭osarusan


    OP, that's an absurd stretch of the defintion of 'victimisation'.

    You claim you want a genuine debate but it's so obviously not any form of victimisation whatsoever that I find it hard to believe your claim.



  • Registered Users Posts: 11,905 ✭✭✭✭anewme


    It says on that clip Irish woman gets punched out by diversity.

    Always thought there was something shifty about that Ashley Banjo and Co myself.

    (Horrible clip - hope he was arrested by the way )



  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 13,929 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    English accent so this can't be pinned on the unvetted wave of rapists everyone is so terrified of. The comments on that Twitter post are scary.



  • Registered Users Posts: 13,505 ✭✭✭✭Mad_maxx


    Masculinity is portrayed as a disorder by the feminist ideologues who get a frequent run out in the media, this creates a narrative

    the exception of course is if the male isn’t white or a traveller, doesn’t matter if he’s running riot in that context, the aforementioned feminists will hold their tongues

    Post edited by Mad_maxx on


  • Registered Users Posts: 862 ✭✭✭redlough


    Don't believe everything you see on the internet would be my answer to that



  • Registered Users Posts: 5,246 ✭✭✭Cody montana


    And yes, the famously oppressed male.

    Beyond ridiculous.



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,838 ✭✭✭TomTomTim


    The clip is a few posts up, are you saying it's fake?

    “The man who lies to himself can be more easily offended than anyone else. You know it is sometimes very pleasant to take offense, isn't it? A man may know that nobody has insulted him, but that he has invented the insult for himself, has lied and exaggerated to make it picturesque, has caught at a word and made a mountain out of a molehill--he knows that himself, yet he will be the first to take offense, and will revel in his resentment till he feels great pleasure in it.”- ― Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Brothers Karamazov




  • Registered Users Posts: 862 ✭✭✭redlough


    I prefer to watch GBNews for all my information 😂



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,838 ✭✭✭TomTomTim


    Funnily if you did you likely wouldn't be such a master of deny the obvious.

    “The man who lies to himself can be more easily offended than anyone else. You know it is sometimes very pleasant to take offense, isn't it? A man may know that nobody has insulted him, but that he has invented the insult for himself, has lied and exaggerated to make it picturesque, has caught at a word and made a mountain out of a molehill--he knows that himself, yet he will be the first to take offense, and will revel in his resentment till he feels great pleasure in it.”- ― Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Brothers Karamazov




  • Registered Users Posts: 798 ✭✭✭Relax brah


    How do I unsubscribe from my own thread? As expected this has gone arseways ffs



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    __________________________________



  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 470 ✭✭archermoo


    No, women you don't know not being willing to engage with you in public places doesn't make you a victim. Stop acting like women who are just trying to go about their day are somehow in the wrong because they don't want to interact with a stranger.

    At a guess I'd say it is likely that there are women from that area who talk to each other either in person or online about that creepy guy that keeps trying to engage them in conversation in the park and keeps doing it no matter how much they just try and ignore him.



This discussion has been closed.
Advertisement