Would you forget this happened and move on?

notAMember

Ouch. I get it. Tracy didn't organise it, or exclude you, so it's the organisers here who initiated the exclusion, and they are still around.

Honestly, in my workplace, doing this, having a party with work people excluding one person or member of a team deliberately, would be considered bullying or at least breaching dignity at work policies. All of them would be reprimanded and sent for retraining. Whether work paid for it or not. If it's all colleagues attending, it's an unofficial work event. Is there a written bullying policy there? You might want to take a read of it, and maybe request the whole company is given a refresher on it, or get it updated to include excluding people from social events if it's not already there.

How large is your organisation? Is there someone who can connect with for emotional support on it? Not a manager or HR at this stage, 3 years later, but more of a counsellor?

ChickenDish

Best way to deal with work colleagues is to keep them at arm's length, your stuck working with them if a friendship/relationship turns sour. Keeping things friendly and polite is the best course of action. Should someone mess with you or bully/harass you, go to your line manager, if they fail to act or are the problem go above their heads. If that doesnt work you have a few options - Change job, stand up to the bully, keep records & go after bully, bury your head in the sand and hope it goes away (this doesnt work btw) or move to different department. Not every option will work for every work place/scenerio.

I've worked in toxic work places and while I personally dont take any ****, I've been stuck trying to clean it up or try to deal with it (the joys of being in management). I presently work in stress/Anxiety free work environment, I actively sought out the role I'm in precisely because its stress free, money isnt the best, but enough to get by.

OP no matter where you work there will always be clicks, different dynamics or some cnut out to make your life hard. The best defense is remain aloof from work politics and dont invest any time or emotions in people you work with once they show their true colours.

All that being said, their are always gems in the rough, lifelong friends to be made. But as with everything, best to test the water first, before you jump in.

dvega

I'd be salty as **** if this happened me. The fact that not one told you is mind blowing. I'd give the finger to the lot but that would be my job. In your shoes because you want to stay, Just drive, call in for a orange and a small chat and then leave. Make an excuse if you have to. What you don't want is somebody getting drunk and then mentioning it.