Who's paying for dates

UsBus

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119510237#Comment_119510237

Ya, well when in Rome....

But if its Mullingar, it's 50/50 or GTFO..

Markus Antonius

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119506910#Comment_119506910

When she said she doesn't pay for meals you should have told her you'd call around to hers tomorrow and to make sure to have the dinner on the table by 6 sharp. Brisk and firm pat on the bot after.

Bit too late now though.

NTSITDOA

The four first dates I've been on in the last few months we split the bill each time, these dates were drinks in a pub/bar rather than a restaurant. One girl said she likes when lads offer but would always offer to pay half, if the lad insists then fine, she'll let him pay but then she'll get the next date. Sounds fairly reasonable.

I'm not fully on board with the idea of "Whoever asks the other person out should pay" because the majority of the time it's lads that do the asking! 😁

Personally I'd wouldn't be too happy if I was pay for all of a date beyond the first date, even having to pay for the full amount on the first date would irk me a little.

DonnaDarko09

When I was on the dating scene a few years ago, the guy would nearly always offer to pay for the first/ second date and then we would split after that. But even that seems outdated to me now. Provided both are working and can afford it, why not 50:50?

in long term relationship, I go 50:50 or we take it in turns to pay and catch up next time if needs be.

I'm traditional in the sense that I like to pay on the first date.

Any date afterwards though...time to open up the knock-off Michael Korrs.

wotzgoingon

I used to be on dating sites all the time back in 2010-2013 and I used to bring the girl I met up with for a meal and would always pay for it and drinks afterwards.

I met up with this Asian girl once who brought along her Asian friend for some reason and they both paid for themselves but I paid for a round of drinks though.

I had to pay for petrol for one girl as she drove and we went to a walk along cliffs. I was banned from driving at the time.

From my experience of dating sites I can count on one hand the number of girls who could hold a conversation. That's 100% honest. I don't know what type of losers were on it at the time. But to be honest the girls who were bad at talking through the computer were well able to talk when we met up. Figure that one out.

Airyfairy12

Id also go splits on bills with dates, cannot understand how women feel comfortable having their night out paid for and not contribute. From my experience of women that I know that are like this, they're usually very entitled and see other peoples money as an extension of their own money with no limits. If you're really into her and want it to work out, set your financial boundaries now.

newhouse87

first dates, still think the guy should pay, one annoying experience where the girl suggested going to a fancy place for dinner for our first meet, that was fine, half way through i knew this wouldn't lead to a second date, i as always offered to pay but this girl just said thanks and obligatory message from her following morning saying she had nice time but didn't want to meet again. She said she goes on lots dates every week so felt bit used on that one occasion.

gary550

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119577604#Comment_119577604

red flag 🚩

I'd be ducking out and splitting that tab as soon as I heard "I go on a lot of dates", ain't nothing special about me (and most men) that says I'm gonna be the last.

wotzgoingon

I remember not long ago reading on some social media that a girl single and poor as she was going to college and used to hook up with a new guy nearly every day and suggested to them they get something to eat. It was so she didn't have to buy or pay for a dinner. Some b*tch she is using everybody like that.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119580145#Comment_119580145

Read on Social media? Apropos of nothing... I've a bridge for sale.

We're forgetting the league system. If the girl is stunning no guy is going to be dividing by two in his head.

Okay, back to reality. I'd not expect the girl to pay on the first date regardless of who asked. I'd very much appreciate the offer of paying for half though. On second or subsequent dates you'd be getting into alternate payments.

YellowLead

I think dinner is a bad idea for a first date. It’s too much of a commitment - I think a walk or a drink or wherever is better - at least if it’s a non runner you don’t have to hang around for three courses. Then you can do dinner next time. Each to their own though :)

Henry Ford III

I've never had an issue in paying for a first date (normally lunch). I think it's good manners if she offers to split it btw.

After that if you perceive an issue with both contributing reasonably towards dates chances are you're right.

CPTM

I prob wouldn't go for a foodie date so early on. Not for a first date anyways. Coffees and walks would be better option, maybe drinks as a second date.. then 3rd or 4th date go for food, by which time you're sort of more comfortable splitting the bill or one person paying the total. For example if either the girl or boy is working and the other one is between jobs or just bought a house or is studying full time I think it's nice if the working person pays the full bill.. but it shouldn't even be a question until date 4 or 5.

Strumms

If I ask a girl out, I’ll pay.

if we ended up dating and I’m paying for 80%-90% of associated expenses, food, drinks, taxis… dropped, like a hot snot.

one girl about 8 years ago, from a reasonably affluent family in a rural part of Munster , but she was renting with two others in Dublin and working….over the 5 months or so we dated id say her grand total expenditure in my direction was about 100-150 euros, being generous…

she was used to being as the youngest girl… with 2 older brothers looked after but that seemed to enable her with an ever growing sense of entitlement.

she had her own car but Strumms is driving, long day at work ? screw it, I was driving, paying and dropping her home. Being invited in depended on her mood… mad….always think that was a valuable lesson.