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I am an alcoholic

  • 09-05-2022 1:17pm
    Registered Users Posts: 4 AloneEit

    I've been sober for over a week due to a health scare and have no plans to relapse, but I'm having a rough couple of days and not experiencing the benefits yet. I still have all the stress and anxiety while I'm working here and have no outlet, no friend to talk to.

    I know this is a common situation for recovering alcoholics to find themselves alone with it all so I'm wondering if anyone has any tips to help. I've tried counselling in the last year and while it helped to an extent, I found 1 session per fortnight to do more harm than good.

    My drinking was at an all time out of control, so maybe I just need to be patient to reap the benefits. It's just tough because I don't think I should be working right now while I'm trying to process all the stress. Also I gave up cigarettes and came off strong anti depressants after taking them for just 3 days under doctor's orders, so maybe I'm just experiencing a triple whammy withdrawal.


  • Registered Users Posts: 187 ✭✭ gladvimpaker

    The best thing is you've admitted you've a problem. Go gentle on yourself and time off with stress could be a good idea.

    Your GP would understand, you could tell them you went mad on the sauce and need time out for recovery.

    If you've health insurance it might get you into a good treatment center.

    It's worth it, because they'll help you settle into a sober lifestyle and you'll get the best help possible.

    AA doesn't work for everyone, there's also lifering which is about building confidence and getting on with a sober lifestyle.

    AA is very old school and it's questionably full of contradictions and bases your sobriety on being a failure, powerless for the rest of your life and you'll be forever thinking you have to do as they say.... but it works for some people who need guidance. I'm not knocking it, but there's different recovery groups.

  • Registered Users Posts: 12,258 ✭✭✭✭ Dial Hard

    Was your GP aware of your alcohol intake too? Because it can be quite dangerous to stop drinking cold turkey if you were an extremely heavy drinker, you may need to do a chemical detox. The anxiety, etc is also likely a side effect of the withdrawal. Something like Librium will manage both that and the physical effects of alcohol withdrawal. Ring your GP, speak to them and be honest about how much you were drinking and for how long.

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  • Registered Users Posts: 3,943 ✭✭✭ SuperBowserWorld

    Switch to a less damaging addiction maybe. I play a video game to take the edge off. I just stick to one game at a time and only a few hours per week. There are some very relaxing ones. And choose an offline, single player, non competitive one. This last point is important.

  • Registered Users Posts: 41,990 ✭✭✭✭ SEPT 23 1989

    I would tackle one thing at a time the withdrawal from the smokes and the pills cant be a barrel of laughs

    focus on getting past the drink then get rid of the smokes

  • Registered Users Posts: 14,841 ✭✭✭✭ Supercell

    One is likely a trigger for the other, when i quit the smokes after reading Allen Carr's famous "Easyway.." book, I had to quit drink, cigs and coffee and crisps as they all were associated with smoking in my brain. Hardest damn thing i ever did but over ten years later I'm firmly an ex-smoker. Took me six weeks IIRC before I was confident that I had broken the cycle.

    Can only wish you the best of luck OP, if you can beat the fags, you'll likely help kill the cravings for the drink too hopefully.

    Have a weather station?, why not join the Ireland Weather Network -

  • Registered Users Posts: 4 AloneEit

    Yeah I accept I haven't been completely honest about it but I think he knows, I'm a wreck who can barely talk every time I see him.

    True enough but last 2 days have been better, so I think I'm coming out of the worst of it for now. Mind you I'm still having these mad vivid dreams from the antidepressants. Pretty crazy given I was only taking them for 3 days, last one Friday. Dunno how people can stick it, they were simply awful for me. All the power to the world to the people who have no choice but to take them.

    Thanks for the support all.

  • Registered Users Posts: 69 ✭✭ RojaStar

    Well done on getting to where you are now, and also for recognising that something has got to give. That is HUGE.

    In addition to the resources mentioned above, there are lots of online communities where you could be interacting with likeminded people all day every day on Facebook or specific apps that they have. Have you heard of One Year No Beer? They do challenges where you sign up say for a 30 day alcohol free challenge and then have support in the form of daily videos, regular live sessions and the Facebook community. I don't work for them or anything! It's just one example of a really active community. Another one is The Naked Mind community. They do a thing called the Alcohol Experiment which is similar, and free.

    There are lots of podcasts and "quit lit" books that you could be listening to to help stay focused and inspired to keep off it in between sessions with the therapist.

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  • Posts: 1,010 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]

    Try and stay with family or friends now even for a week or two. Can be difficult to call if you need urgent help if in the throws of withdrawal. Also severe DTs can result in loss of touch with reality and worse. Its the weekend. Go to out of hours gp today. There will be physical signs if you are in danger of severe DTs and a script for some detox meds can literaly be a lifesaver.

    Also don,t be the guy who has multiple relapses. Do it properly now and hopefully do it just once, and best of luck.

    Sorry op. Didnt see your subsequent message that you are over the worst. Great news. Will leave the post up for others in the same situation

  • Registered Users Posts: 781 ✭✭✭ riddles

    Well done keep it going you have taken the hardest steps.

  • Registered Users Posts: 4 AloneEit

    Sorry to say I have relapsed. Not drinking as much as I was but can't escape the overwhelming sadness.

    It's the panic that gets me and I know I need to go back to counselling. I think I'm a good person but it angers me to feel the need for counselling while those who bullied me are sailing through life.

  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 4,644 Mod ✭✭✭✭ HildaOgdenx

    Are you still attending your GP? If not, please do. Take time out from work and give yourself a chance to get back on your feet.

    Try to put the bullies out of the equation. Easier said than done, I know. There's an expression about the best revenge being a life well lived. They may get their just desserts one day, they may not. I worked with a mega bully. He left a trail of destruction in his wake, and he is still out there somewhere - his career has gone from strength to strength. That's life, unfortunately.

    But what is important now is that your health is suffering. Please make that your priority, talk to your GP and start again with counselling. Mind yourself.

  • Registered Users Posts: 4 AloneEit

    I appreciate the replies.

    No haven't been to the GP since my last visit, but have been making efforts to get healthier on my own and I'm seeing results. Losing weight and heart rate is down.

    I was doing fine until last Wednesday and a number of things just set me off between work and seeing something on social media. I woke up yesterday feeling not well at all so thankfully took the warning signs and stopped drinking. Thankfully because I haven't been drinking I felt back to normal today whereas the hangovers were lasting so much longer before.

    I'm in a difficult spot right now and just don't know what to prioritise. I'm working my notice right now and before starting a new job at the end of July. If I'm being honest with myself I think I've gone the wrong route of starting a new job which is adding to the panic and stress, even though I knew I had no more to give in my current job..

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,251 ✭✭✭ tinpib

    Try and not beat yourself up over your relapse. I gave up drinking "permanently" 3 times and each one was 2 steps forward 1 step back and also each one lasted around 4.5 months. I'm not counting all the other "never drinking again"s that lasted up to a month, a couple of weeks, days or even just hours.

    However then everything clicked on my 4th attempt and I'm sober over 6 years now. The stint of sobriety you had will serve you well, it will make it slightly easier the next time as you know you can do it for x length of time. Try and identify what led to the relapse and solve it. And just don't give up giving up!

    I found the stopdrinking subreddit to be excellent as therre are hundreds of thousands of people on there, so lots more comments/stories/advice.

  • Registered Users Posts: 821 ✭✭✭ Liberty_Bear

    Good luck OP, Its not easy and I admire your resolve. Each day is a step towards more sobriety. Stanhope centre are pretty good in Dublin, might offer support. Best wishes

    Big lad who likes big lads...:)

  • Registered Users Posts: 322 ✭✭ NiceFella

    You will absolutely make mistakes on the way to recovery. Do not beat yourself up too much. It's a bump in the road. Mind yourself.

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  • Registered Users Posts: 145 ✭✭ Beatty69

    Do not try to give up the smokes at the same time as alcohol! It will not work.

  • Registered Users Posts: 252 ✭✭ global23214124

    Smart recovery have online meetings as well. They may have in person meetings as well now due to covid being over or a mixture of both.

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,442 ✭✭✭ bad2thebone

    You've made the right decision and I suggest you be honest with yourself. And take time out, it's all well and good getting on some program of recovery etc AA isn't regulated or a professional body. It's ok for staying off the drink, but it's full of contradictions and sometimes it does more harm than good. It has a very low recovery rate and there's a lot of control freaks there.

    Just keep an open mind, a good treatment center that's more modern than the 12 step types could be better than launching yourself into the holy book of AA and listening to drunk logs and some dude saying he'll be your sponsor and rule your life. Telling you what their version of sobriety is, and if you don't phone them every day you're not willing to work the program kind of attitude.

  • I haven't had a drink in years after drinking way too much for too long and honestly never felt a whole lot of benefit mood-wise. I'm sure plenty of people will say otherwise and everyone wants to be positive but you probably need to manage expectations. All that **** you drinking to avoid is still there.

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,433 ✭✭✭ Bobtheman

    There is a brilliant book alcohol explained by William porter.

    He takes a very scientific view. That practically everything we think booze does is a myth bar the fact that each drink gives us about 20 minutes of relaxation but then leaves us with more stress and anxiety than we had before we drank.

    Most of the relief we feel with booze is simply the ending of the withdrawal.

    Basically nobody should drink its a con.

    Remember once we all thought it was ok to smoke cigarettes and to deny women the vote.

  • Registered Users Posts: 10 Dublinia16

    Body here

    Post edited by Dublinia16 on