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Housemate -unreasonable noise complaint

  • 22-03-2022 9:10am
    Posts: 0

    Need to get this off my chest before I start work, feel like laughing and crying.

    This morning at 7.45 am my housemate who's a female maybe 26 has been living here for 3 years, I'm 31 have been here for four years.

    She came into the kitchen at like 7.45 am saying that I woke her up. My other housemate was there. I did nothing out of the way, i did move what was on the straining board into the press and apparently the saucepans and press doors were making noise they weren't. The house was advertised for working professionals and we do behave like mice here. It was very intense for first thing in the morning. She works as a music teacher in the evening, maybe she sleeps in however the rest of us are getting ready for work and not doing anything intentional.



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,426 ✭✭✭maestroamado

    I know you did nothing wrong but give her a break... 7.45 am not the time for reloading the presses...

  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]

    It's really horrible, before I used to leave the house earlier. We're a house of working professionals, grand if she chooses to sleep in. Two other housemates were already up. Her thing it was that it was before 8, yes that's how people operate before they go to work. We can't demand for people to not be able to live easily, I think she went over board and especially directing it all to me when they're was another housemate in the kitchen. I do think **** her. To me she's a madam

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,706 ✭✭✭Deeec

    You done nothing wrong - shes being unreasonable. Its acceptable to be using the kitchen at 7.45am. If she has a problem with this she needs to move out and find another place. Hopefully she reflects on this later and apologises to you.

  • Registered Users Posts: 31 CantCatchCovid

    Used to live with a fella that would cook his dinner at 3/4am with headphones on.

    Smashing all the pots into each other etc.

    Would look at you like you had too heads when you told him to shut the **** up 🤣,never again.

  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]

    Thanks, to be honest it's changed my morning. It has been the most words she spoke to me to near 9 months - maybe she's got built up rage against me too. If it was a Sunday I'd understand a little bit on a weekday

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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]

  • Registered Users Posts: 5,777 ✭✭✭Princess Calla

    7:45 is not early for professionals.

    I'd be out the door at 7 to be in the office at 8.

    Guaranteed if you left the draining board full she'd be complaining that the dishes weren't put away in a timely manner.

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,894 ✭✭✭Padre_Pio

    Nah, I get woken up at 7.30 most mornings by my housmate clip clopping down the stairs in heels for work.

    After 7 is fair game IMO, most would be up for work around then. Maybe WFH has changed some routines, but people should expect some reasonable noise in the mornings.

  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]

    11pm to 7am is standard time to be more careful with noise,other than that a person should be able to live without going crazy or disrespectful. Like she teaches the flute from home in the evening, it's annoying but i get over it, it's give and take. Thanks for commenting, i moved more to the crying stage from the shock of it in the morning

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,426 ✭✭✭maestroamado

    I often stay in a town house and the guy next door says he always knows when i am there as will hear doors etc... i think it would be a good idea to let whoever gets up last put away the pots etc...

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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]

    She came into the kitchen guns blazing, she doesn't speak a word to me. Always wears headphones around the house, so this felt more intense. I get what you're saying and you're right... just want to feel like i can live here with ease. Covid has changed things in our dynamic and I think inflation will make things worse too

  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 23,055 ✭✭✭✭beertons

    If the pots were dry last night, who didn't put them away? I hate coming down to a full kitchen, stuff everywhere. Tidy up before bed, and there won't be noise in the morning.

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,426 ✭✭✭maestroamado

    Try to use it as an opportunity to have a chat... maybe say that you shouldn't have being putting away stuff... it may help long term if there is a chat about it among you all... she likely realize that there was an over-reaction on her part...

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,275 ✭✭✭km991148

    yeah exactly - everyone has a bad day now and again. Maybe the kitchen noise reverberates more than you think and she's been sitting on it. Maybe other things going on. A chat now and work it out between you before blowing it out of all proportion is my take.

  • Registered Users Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus

    I would ignore it and continue on.

    Monday to Friday, anything after 7am is fair game. Don't apologise, don't yield or imply you did anything wrong. Because you didn't. If she likes to sleep in on weekdays and/or works late, then she should wear earplugs.

    It sounds like she was having a bad morning. I'd wait until later today and give her a chance to apologise for going off on one.

  • Registered Users Posts: 16,545 ✭✭✭✭osarusan

    I'd guess this was the final straw in a line of real and/or imagined issues with other houemates.

  • Registered Users Posts: 28,797 ✭✭✭✭Wanderer78

    she needs earplugs!

  • Registered Users Posts: 23,256 ✭✭✭✭ted1

  • Registered Users Posts: 13,376 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard

    What did she actually say and what's the issue you're looking for advice on, exactly? It sounds to me like you both overreacted, tbh.

  • Registered Users Posts: 5,368 ✭✭✭JimmyVik

    People are weird.

    I used to live in a terraced house. I would have the neighbour on the left knock on my door at all hours of the morning asking me if the noise (said they were playing loud must at 2 - 3am every night) from the neighbor on the right was bothering me. I didnt hear any noise whatsoever from the neighbor on the right, but i often heard noise (not loud) from the one knocking on my door.

    This went one every night for 2 weeks. Finally I exploded and told them i didnt hear a fcuking sound from them. In fact I had slept soundly every single night until they started knocking on the door. I asked them would they kindly knock on the door of the person who they have the problem with in future. They never spoke to us again after that. They never went next door either.

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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,228 ✭✭✭The Mighty Quinn

    I'd agree completely. OP you're over reacting to her over reaction.

    My wife sometimes takes the kids on a weekend morning at 5-6am, as I'd usually take them during the week. She'll often then proceed to "get a headstart on the day" and cook the dinner at 6am, pots and pans clanging in and out of drawers, so much for the sleep in. It is a grating noise when you're in bed, I get it, but jesus at nearly 8 in the morning I wouldn't be long telling her where to go if she had an outburst at me about it.

  • Registered Users Posts: 7,659 ✭✭✭YellowLead

    She needs to cop on. If it was 5 in the morning that might be unreasonable but living with working professionals you expect noise from people from 7. Going around with headphones all the time seems weird too.

    If she complains to the landlord they will tell her where to go, so just ignore her as much as you can, hopefully she will move out.

  • Registered Users Posts: 28,797 ✭✭✭✭Wanderer78

    she may have auditory sensitivities, this could explain the headphones

  • Registered Users Posts: 24,347 ✭✭✭✭breezy1985

    What's all this "working professional" bollix. Are there also "working unprofessionals" and "non working professionals"

  • Registered Users Posts: 936 ✭✭✭fatbhoy

    The dishes and pots/pans should be dried with a tea-towel straight after they're washed, and then put away. Cook, clean, tidy away. No waiting around crap. That's how a smooth house works.

  • Registered Users Posts: 352 ✭✭Snugbugrug28

    She's musical so her hearing is off the Richter scale that's why

  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]

    Well, for just meaning that we're a house of people who work full time whether from home or outside of the house. I know that it doesn't mean anything to do with a persons characteristics

  • Registered Users Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus

    I know this is off-topic, but yes people are very odd about noise. I live in a group of 4 terraced houses. Let's say numbered 1-4 and I live in no. 2. Kids in no. 4 got drums last summer. Neighbour in no. 1 bitched for a month solid about the noise and how she felt like she couldn't open her windows. Neighbour in no. 3 was like, "Yeah it's noisier inside but they're kids and they don't play for more than 20 mins at a time, so what are you gonna do?".

    Some people think there is a right to silence or that complaining about noise is a "done thing". From experience, the important thing is to not relent to these kinds of people or they'll ramp up the complaints. If you are objectively making a reasonable amount of noise for the time of day, then don't promise to make less noise or apologise for it.

    If someone doesn't like the normal noise level that comes with a type of living arrangement, then it's up to them to move on, it's not up to everyone else to accommodate them.

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,266 ✭✭✭thefallingman

    If this is the first time she has moaned in years I don’t think it’s a big deal she probably just had a bad day or night like we all do sometimes I wouldn’t be too hard on her

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  • Registered Users Posts: 5,368 ✭✭✭JimmyVik

    To be fair though anyone who buys a kid drums should buy them headphones. There is no need these days for a kid to be playing drums that make sounds loud enough to be heard outside the house. I have a kit myself and not a peep can be heard from any other room on the rare occassions they are played these days.