Options when there is no money for funeral

Need a Username

What happens if you die and you haven’t left enough money behind for a funeral?

I had a health scare just recently. It has turned out okay but what was worrying me was that I have very little savings - and my sister is a person that she would put herself in debt paying for a funeral.

Any money that I have when I die I would want to go to her and her kids - not on burying me.

what is the least expensive option ? There has to be some kind of funeral - my sister is insanely sentimental and would need a funeral.

Spanish Eyes

You could have a memorial service only, and donate your body to medical science. Minimal cost and very noble.

Rket4000

Can you specify in a will that you only want a small, inexpensive funeral?

Bannasidhe

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417741#Comment_118417741

A friend of mine with MND has already made the necessary arrangements to do this. He doesn't want his wife wasting money on a funeral when she will need it herself after he dies.

listermint

Wouldnt arranging and paying for exactly what you want budget wise be the best option? That way they don't have to do anything.

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417741#Comment_118417741

I had intended that my organs be donated to people awaiting transplants (I have not registered as an organ donor so I must do that) but never considered donating the kit of me to science.

I don’t know how my sister would react to that.

laoisgem

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417771#Comment_118417771

The will would probably not be read for a long time after the death tho.

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417771#Comment_118417771

we have discussed it before and I have told her it should be a small affair with no fuss and a limited guest list. Whether she will do it is another thing.

I guess a solicitor telling her officially could be a good idea

laoisgem

I know somebody who not only has their funeral paid for and the plot in the graveyard, but has went so far as having the headstone and surround already erected. Obviously his name and date of death to be added whenever the time comes. That's an extreme case I'll admit (totally creeped me out in the graveyard seeing a headstone with no name on it)

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417790#Comment_118417790

That is actually something I meant to ask about in my first post.

What cost is a budget funeral ? Can I pay a funeral home in instalments in advance?

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417854#Comment_118417854

I know that my sister is on board with cremation for me. That is the only element that I know she will do.

I can’t figure out what to do with the ashes though. If I don’t decide something she have me on the mantelpiece freaking the kids out and in all the Christmas photos for years to come. :(

Capt'n Midnight

Contacts for organ and whole body donation. https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/health/health_services/blood_and_organ_donation/organ_and_body_donation.html

scwazrh

I would suggest you take out a life assurance policy .depending on your circumstances it can be very affordable .I know most people see life assurance as a waste of money but the piece of mind it gives might be worth the small cost to you

laoisgem

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417879#Comment_118417879

It massively depends on what part of the country your in. As you can tell from my user name I'm in Laois and it would average around €6k but that's including the plot and burial.

Bannasidhe

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417840#Comment_118417840

Not necessarily. My late Dad had a copy of his will easily accessible among his papers when he died and it outlined what kind of funeral he wanted. It was read before his funeral was arranged and his wishes followed.

laoisgem

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417921#Comment_118417921

Did ye know he had a will made and where to find it? I just don't think anyone is going to start doing paperwork, going through stuff when they've had a bereavement. Sorry for your loss btw.

Tow

The DEASP will pay for the actual funeral. The relation(s) should contact the local Welfare Officer. I believe most funeral homes will actually look after this for the family.

Found link: https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/social_welfare/social_welfare_payments/death_related_benefits/benefits_and_entitlements_following_a_death.html

Bannasidhe

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417937#Comment_118417937

We thought he might but weren't sure. Didn't expect to find a copy so easily. Hardly "doing paperwork" when all a person is doing is looking for an address book for contact details of family not in Ireland to let them know.

samo

My mother passed away in the summer and in covid times, it was anyway very minimal. With coffin, cremation, some lovely flowers and small church service, hire of hearse and removal from hospital and to funeral home, it cost 4.5k.

it was actually a bit less than I expected but I must say, the funeral directors really were very kind and I’m glad they could take the pressure off. It could have even been a bit cheaper again but cremations in remembrance garden and burial plots make it more expensive.

I have to say, I was really worried how we would pay for it and they did give a discount on the bill being settled within I think 60 Days, some credit unions also give cover for funeral costs, but the cheapest option was a cremation without a service or any of the above (around 2k I think) and glad we didn’t have to look at that option.

Hope it helps and wish you all the best!

laoisgem

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417972#Comment_118417972

I didn't mean it as any disrespect but you obviously found it by chance so advising to make a will is not the best option if not involving family members.

Bannasidhe

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118418014#Comment_118418014

No. He left it where it would be easily and quickly found.

It's not that difficult with a bit of foresight.

wandererz

Arrange things before hand. Arrange a payment plan.

Opt for a cremation instead.

https://www.irishtimes.com/business/financial-services/how-to-arrange-a-funeral-and-keep-the-costs-within-reason-1.4340200

Spanish Eyes

I am trying to be delicate here given the subject, but are your parents alive?

If not there would be room in the grave to inter the ashes. If they are still with you what arrangements have they made, and would you be ok being buried with them? Maybe your grandparents grave? I apologise if that sounds off, but it is something to think about. No costs of purchasing a grave or headstone anyway.

olestoepoke

Eco funerals are considerably cheaper and better for the environment. Theres a place in Wexford that looks lovely. Biodegradable coffin, no chemicals pumped into your body. The setting is really nice, like a walk in a forest with your name on a rock. And if you're not religious it could be cheaper again, no church fees.

amdublin

Talk with your bank/a financial advisor/insurance broker about taking out a small $20k policy to pay for funeral expenses. Should not be too expensive maybe $10/20 per month???? They will be used to getting requests like this, it is a pretty standard policy tbh

Need a Username

Thanks everyone.

thsi is something I need to sort out. Not planning on going soon but would like my sister to not have to deal with it all

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118418677#Comment_118418677

No need for apologises.

it is a reasonable question.

My mother passed away early last year. She was cremated as was her wish. That was what I wanted too until whole body donation was suggested. I will have to think about it - no actual body to bury or ashes to scatter might make it worse for my sister.

There “family” plot is not an option - don’t want to get into that here.

Didn’t think of it as option before until now but I suppose my mother’s parents grave could be an option if my aunts had no objection. However cremation was my first choice - now I have donation to consider as that removes the cost completely and does some good .

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417741#Comment_118417741

That seems to be for spouses and partners but I will look into and see if there is some assistance for othe

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417945#Comment_118417945

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417741#Comment_118417741

is the body used for years or does get used up quick?

what happens when it can’t be studied or dissected anymore?

mobby

Home - The Green Graveyard Company Ltd. - Woodbrook Natural Burial Ground Co. Wexford

Just looked that up Interesting.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118418772#Comment_118418772

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118419160#Comment_118419160

Doesn’t include the cost of cremation

I is on the opposite side of the country though but it does look nice

trying to get to sleep but not happening

I don’t want money spent on burying or cremating when my sister can make use of any savings I manage. Going to have to find the opportunity to talk to her about donation to medical science

Jellybaby_1

If a family is in financial difficulties I think the local council might have grants available. I expect undertakers might have information in these circumstances.

Do you have a credit union account?

Most credit unions will contribute to a member's funeral costs. My local credit union pays €3250 towards funeral costs for full members, which is enough to cover a cremation.

To be a full member you must have €200 saved in Shares (may vary in other credit unions).

HildaOgdenx

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417854#Comment_118417854

I have seen that in graveyards. I also know of someone who has very specific instructions written down in relation to their funeral, and the family members are aware of where the instructions are kept. So that might be something you could do, OP.

Also, as regards ashes, they can be interred either in a family plot, if there is one, or you can organise a burial plot, if not.

Pistachio19

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118419050#Comment_118419050

You seem to be overly concerned about what your sister thinks and will want. You need to decide for yourself what happens, be that your body goes to research or you have a funeral that you can save towards now. If you decide on a funeral, start a savings account, write/type up your wishes, and tell your sister where the information is filed, so its easily accessible to her if/when you die before her. If you decide to donate your body then do the paperwork and tell your sister after its all sorted.

My brother enquired about donating his body, and was told they had so many, that they couldn't give any guarantee his would be taken when the time came!

Have a back up plan!

The Mighty Quinn

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417854#Comment_118417854

My father has his plot in the graveyard ready, no headstone but has the surround and stone on it etc. Sometimes he'd be out tending to his own father's grave and he'd say, "right, time to go and clean my own grave" and he'd head across to his own, pull weeds and pick up leaves, give the surround a wash etc. It's kind of amusing.

rainagain

Could you set up a small monthly payment into a bank account, and then in your will specify the money is for her? I know it doesn't answer your original question, but could be a way of having something just for her if the will is read after the funeral/service.

monseiur

You may be over thinking the whole thing. There is a 50/50 chance you may outlive your sister so take this fact into consideration when making your will, funeral arrangments etc. Start saving a little every week and have this specific account set up so that your next of kin have easy access to the funds when the time comes. The Dept. of Social Welfare will pay a least €2,000.00 grant towards your funeral expenses if your next of kin are not in a financial position to pay - that's a great help so if you have say €4,000.00 saved you have nothing to worry about. To save some euros you can leave some specific instructions like no hired in musicians at mass, use CD's instead, no 'afters' at the local hotel / pub, no expensive headstone, go for the cheapest MDF coffin, etc.

Have a chat with your local Co. Council about the cost of a single plot in your local graveyard - in case you decide at the last minute to provide the earth worms with some nourishment ! You may be able to book a specific plot by paying a deposit and the remainder later. Once you have all arrangements made to the best of your ability, put it to the back of your mind and enjoy life and make the most of it - and remember as we're only here for a short time it should be for a good time.

thefallingman

It's a good question op and one i have asked myself, paying 5 or 6 grand frankly is a rip off for bleeding a body and putting it in the ground, no wonder funeral directors all live in big houses.

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118427499#Comment_118427499

There is zero chance of it

I appreciate you taking the time to post and the information you have gave is good but you picked a bizarre way to start the post,

I read the first couple of lines and thought you were just trying to be horrible and I nearly posted something in response

I’m very glad to be able to say I was wrong though.

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118426245#Comment_118426245

I’m not overly concerned

im the right amount of concerned

olestoepoke

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118427589#Comment_118427589

I agree 100%, they have families over a barrel. Not me, I'm still young and healthy so its a ways off hopefully. I'm not religious so no church for me, I will buy a plot in Wexford for 950 and a biodegradable coffin for a few hundred. With the opening fees (450)I think I could do it all in for und 2k. My family live in Dublin so they won't get to visit as often which I like, I'd want people to get on with their lives. A trip to Wexford a couple of times a year will be good for them.They bury you 4ft down so the organisms and flora process is easier, I like the idea of my remains feeding a tree or plants.

Glaceon

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118417854#Comment_118417854

This is how it is done in the US too (at least the part I know). Walking around the graveyard you’ll see plenty of names but no death date until they’re buried.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118438243#Comment_118438243

That's bizarre. Could the money not be just assigned to a family member or something. Definitely on the extreme side.

MakersMark

Funeral costs will come from your estate first, before other beneficiaries are paid.

If your estate is 8k, and the funeral costs 6k, your sister will get the remaining.

Maybe just give her the cash before you pass on.

Need a Username

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118438183#Comment_118438183

I remember a joke from a Dane Cook show where he has an argument with an atheist who believes we go back to feed the earth and we become trees - so Dane Cook says he will cut down the tree, turn it into paper and print the Bible on it. :)

I agree totally with how you feel about the visiting a grave. That place is Wexford looks nice. And a day out there would probably have people feel veered than a visit to a regular graveyard.

Big Bag of Chips

Any money that I have when I die I would want to go to her and her kids - not on burying me.

Well someone will have to pay for it and if you don't, she will.

You should visit an undertaker and ask about grants. Also ask about different types of funerals, burials etc. I don't know a whole lot about it but my brother-in-law died last year. He was unemployed, separated and living in a hostel. His wife was able to apply for a grant that covered the entire cost of funeral, cremation, and memorial plaque.

If you don't want your sister bearing the cost when the time comes then you need to get all your arrangements in place now. Start saving, putting a sum aside. As mentioned, the credit union have a scheme go speak to a credit untion too.

It is noble that you don't want your sister to be out of pocket. But the cost will need to be covered. So you have to plan for that and accept that you can't leave everything to your sister, but you can leave everything after you've cleared your own debts and expenses.

HildaOgdenx

There are some links in this earlier thread that might be useful to you, OP, and maybe to others on your thread.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058156487/not-using-a-funeral-director#latest

sully123

Just a note on the donating to science option. I heard of someone who did this. His body was eventually returned to his family for interment by them. Im not sure how long after or if this is always the case. But it might be something to consider. You may not want your sister to have to deal with that.

Big Bag of Chips

Family friends of ours did it. Their daughter's body was returned to them after a few months and they had her funeral then.