Endless silence on dating apps

Mister Vain

I prefer to meet up quickly too, but If the person is busy you can often end up texting for weeks. Sometimes I'd suggest going for a coffee at the weekend, but they might be doing something or heading off somewhere with friends. Then I'm trying to think of more topics to fill the void until the following weekend and hope they're free by then.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118364200#Comment_118364200

On the other hand, it's a great filter by stating in the ad what he's looking for (but not what he's against). There are tons of creative dullards on those apps who are pretty much the same - "loads of interests", "easy going", "love my family and friends" - and about as original as a typical Irish wedding. A person giving more info allows you to narrow them down one way or another so this saves everybody time.

Also, there are tons of people (women, in my case) who keep the same photo on those apps for months. They haven't a clue. Change the photos; you don't need to be a tech genius to do that. And what on earth is the story with these luddites who put paint blotches on the other people in the photo? Did they ever see the word 'crop' in their photo program? Basic technical ineptitude = another warning sign that she'll be a womanchild. Generally, though, I am astonished at how vacuous, shallow, superficial and fake are the vast majority of the profiles. Incredible posers everywhere, whatever is the female equivalent of the dick-measuring context is in full flow. There's zero character or personality being displayed. Oh, and any chance these apps could stop showing me men just because the man decided to designate himself as female? Lastly, avoid OKCupid and its €34 per month fees to see the 100 people who "like" you as they're all from Kenya and there's about 10 people (possibly) in Ireland on the entire app.

Nice to see being matched by a dating agency is so open in 2022. Membership of poor old Datadate in the 1990s was up there with being in the Freemasons in terms of secrecy (as was admitting finding one's other half via the penpal section on the last page of Ireland's Own where farmers stated their milk quota in pursuit of child-bearing hips!)

growleaves

Say 'I'd love to take you out' as part of the first or second message without necessarily getting specific. That lets them know you're not wasting time. Then you will loop back to that later in the conversation, with a specific time/place/activity ('Meet me at...etc.')

Also (if you're politically correct you might not like this..) mention or hint at sex, preferably in a way that is funny and not too explicit.

You're not a character in a Victorian novel. They're looking for sex and so are you.

Hope this helps.

YellowLead

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118980570#Comment_118980570

Agree with the first section of advice - not really the second.

Rightly or wrongly somebody bringing sex up before meeting can give the impression that all they are out for is a ride. Anytime I’ve met somebody where that had clearly been the case, I’ve looked back and realised there were red flags - such as mentioning sex up front.

A vague non sleazy joke is prob okay. Once you have met in person then it’s totally fine to make such jokes - and a good way to see if somebody is a bit of a laugh or a prude. But just be careful with it too early, and the context.

Hannibal_Smith

Mod note

Since the OP hasn't been back since January, I'll close this one off.

If you want it reopened for further advice OP just PM one of the Mods.

Thanks

HS