Drinking while alone

maeve99

Is there still a stigma? Having a few bottles or a glass of wine every night. I know a friend who thinks anyone who does so is an alcoholic but has no problem getting trashed when going to pubs/nightclubs (before the pandemic).

SEPT 23 1989

The friend sounds like an alcoholic

Nothing wrong having a few cans/bottles on a Friday or Saturday night.

Your friend sounds like he blows his weeks wages on booze.

.red.

A friend would usually have a glass of jameson in the evenings and his wife nagged him like crazy about it while she sipped her glass of red wine, because that was different somehow.

It's only a problem when it becomes a problem. The hard thing is knowing when that is.

FintanMcluskey

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058210536/drinking-while-alone

Am I reading the OP incorrectly??

They mention a few bottles of wine every night, but poster's are saying the friend is an alcoholic

A few bottles of wine every night is a problem. A glass of wine is not

The friend binges in a social setting (presumably) on a Friday or Saturday night, still not great but less of a problem IMO, unless they get trashed every night of the week as well.

Also I have found that a 3/4 pints in a pub/restaurant will have me ready for bed, but at home I could drink twice that for some weird reason

EDIT: just realised the OP mean's few bottles of beer or a glass of wine! That's not so bad. Bit like the continental attitude to drink

Tell me how

Neither the person who has a drink at home every night, nor the person who gets hammered in a nightclub has a problem.

Or both do, if you consider the recommended guidelines for units per week.

People go through phases in their life when they are doing the nightclub thing, then the casual drinks thing, quite often they stop this when responsibilities around children come in to play or for a myriad of other reasons.

There is no definitive right or wrong for all people/circumstances.

Recliner

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117942552#Comment_117942552

I think they meant a few bottles of beer/cider or whatever.. Not bottles of wine.

Millions of Finns.can't be wrong!

https://www.pri.org/stories/2020-04-13/kalsarik-nnit-drinking-home-your-undies-finns

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117942591#Comment_117942591

Undies? **** that - turn the sauna on and go naked.

I think there's a certain amount of arrogance associated with telling someone how and when to drink. As long as it's not effecting your health and work life, who the **** are they to judge?

Strumms

It’s grand at times, used to do it occasionally on a Friday, be so tired about 2 out of 5 Friday’s and finishing about 7 that the only way I’d be able or interested going out would be if there was something specific on like a gig or party... shops near me has a chipper, best Asian place this side of Asia and a supermarket with a huge selection of beers and I’d spend Friday with a food take away from either, a few ice cold large bottles of Peroni or 1664.... and the PS4 / Netflix and then talking shîte on here.

murpho999

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117942555#Comment_117942555

Agree with most of what you say but I think if you drink alcohol everyday then you may need to examine your relationship with alcohol.

Nothing wrong in and of itself if limits are set and can be stuck to. However, I have seen people especially during Covid descend into worsening alcoholism until crisis point. Now since alcoholism is a progressive disease that very often leads to near death, its progress can be accelerated by drinking alone, though I doubt it is caused by it, but those more knowledgeable may be able to enlighten. The alcoholic will seek it out come hell or high water and the more alone time the more the opportunity. The irony is that it takes near death or major social disruption for the sick person to think to maybe take action before death or irreversible damage actually occurs, that’s the nature of it.

For the average drinker, drinking alone, if it doesn’t lead to actual full-blown alcoholism, still has the potential to damage health simply because there might not be the distractions or restraints there to limit the quantity consumed. But that goes for “enthusiastic” social drinking at home too if all parties present are apt to open the next bottle.

The questions to ask are:

Is it impacting your work; eg frequent major hangovers, withdrawal symptoms, need to top up a bit during day or start early in evening, need to take some days to “calm the nerves”?

Is it affecting most of your non working days as above?

Has it affected your health beyond the temporary occasional hangover?

Are you prioritising it over your social interactions?

Has it affected your ability to drive and do things you otherwise would have done or intended to do?

Is it affecting your behaviour other than being temporarily relaxed whilst consuming?

if the answer is yes to any of the questions you may have something of a problem.

SortingYouOut

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117945951#Comment_117945951

That all depends on a few things though. If you're having a beer or two/glass of wine to unwind after a day's work, it isn't really a problem but obviously no alcohol is always better than any.

In my opinion it all becomes a problem if you're using alcohol as an escape or if it begins impacting your health negatively.

A good test is quitting for a month and reflecting on how difficult it was. If it was a real chore, you have a problem.

Edit: Just to add, it is an important trait to be able to spend time alone with yourself and your thoughts, so if you're drinking because you can't bare your own sober company, that's an issue.

ShatterAlan

I don't get this problem with drinking on your own or drinking at home.

People who frown upon drinking at home are the weirdos in my opinion. What's so bad about drinking at home? You eat at home. You do all manner of other activities at home. Do you only eat in restaurants? Do you only read in a library? Do you only watch movies in a cinema? Do you only exercise in a gymasium? Do you only play games in a casino or amusement arcade?

Yet these people only drink in a pub where a beer is 6 times the price of one that you buy in a supermarket. A glass of wine in a pub costs as much as whole bottle from the off license. And what's the issue with drinking on your own whether at home or in the pub. I often go to the pub by myself and sit outside on the terrace or beer garden and drink my pint and read my book or do the crossword. Am I some kind of sick degenerate?

Sgt Hartman

Nothing I love more than chilling on a Friday eve in front of the tv with a beer and maybe a snifter of whiskey. It helps me totally unwind after a busy week.

murpho999

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117946151#Comment_117946151

You say it depends on a few things but name only one.

If you're having a beer or two/glass of wine EVERY DAY after work then you are drinking too much.

It's not the activity/reason behind drinking that makes it any better or less harmful.

You should look at a documentary made by TV presenter linked below.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RX2opvj7WE8&ab_channel=StevePotz-Rayner

He's successful in many ways and never thought himself as a having a problem with drink. Was having them like you say to "relax after work" but he was simply drinking too much.

Drinking every day is just not healthy. Very simple

oceanman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117946446#Comment_117946446

dont agree with that, my uncle drank two large bottles of stout every day, lived to a few months short of a hundred, never in hospital a day in his life.

c.p.w.g.w

Not a massive drinker, but I have only ever drank alone at home once, I had a bottle of whiskey and wanted a taste, so had one glass watching a movie...

Would happily sit in my local(when i had a local) with a book or newspaper and had a few pints of an evening if I was at a loose end

Church on Tuesday

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117946446#Comment_117946446

So you're saying, if you have for example one bottle of beer a night to unwind after work, so 7 drinks total in a week, that makes you an alcoholic?

That's what most people would drink on a decent night out per weekend sure.

murpho999

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117946757#Comment_117946757

Always anecdotes from people with stuff like this, also with smoking but the scientific research and evidence shows that drinking alcohol every day is bad for you.

murpho999

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117947026#Comment_117947026

I never said anything about being an alcoholic but you could be developing a problem. For example why do you need a beer every day to unwind. Think there's something wrong if you always need a drink in order to unwind. Do you see what I'm getting at.

Generally people will have more than one sometimes and it goes from there.

I'm not anti drink by the way, love a pint and a night out but you should also give your body a break as well.

Potential-Monke

I didn't find it a problem. Initially. I found it a problem when it was a bottle of rum every night. Then I stopped. But I replaced it with weed, which is far better in nearly every aspect. Except the price.

I don't see the harm in a couple of bottle or a glass or two of wine a night, but I'd be getting more worried about it becoming a routine, one which when interrupted can cause your mood to change. Once it's a routine, it's very easy to make it 3 bottles, then 4, then a 6-pack, then back to 4 but with a couple of chasers, and so on. Well, that's how it roughly went with me.

As people have said above, it's only a problem when it starts affecting other parts of your life, and only you can decide when that is.

Akrasia

🍹I don't have a problem with drinking at home, but I do find that work gets in the way. At least working from home means I don't have to stop drinking early in the evening so I can be safe driving to work the next day

What a world we currently live in

Delilahcat

A few drinks on a Friday evening on your own with a good movie is heaven. I love it. Don't get the stigma around having a few by yourself.

Obviously getting scuttered by yourself every other day is an issue but that's a different conversation.

super_furry

I love drinking alone. Rarely happens nowadays, but if my wife is away with the kids, I like nothing more than cracking open a bottle of wine or a few cans and watching a football match or a bad horror film or even just playing videogames.

walshb

It's a very gray area as to what is normal and what is a problem.....

What is an alcoholic? Someone who drinks, and always drinks? Or someone whose functioning/life suffers due to drink..

The term alcoholic has very negative connotations, but the truth is that there are many more alcoholics than we think, that are not alcoholics in the really negative stereotypical sense.

Addicted to alcohol is probably the better term. Someone who drinks very regularly, but has a normal and functioning life. No different to a caffeine drinker.

The alcoholic is more the person whose life is more consumed by alcohol.

Ash.J.Williams

i often wonder what people with no vices actually do on their own, sounds pure weird to me!

dinner for one, nationwide, episode of Australian married at first sight and bed?

Andrea B.

Love a few bottles of craft IPA after a week of work. Friday and Saturday.

Sometimes (depending on mood) look forward to having those few on my own.

Granted, i have a safety net of ready for the snooze after 4, max 5.

I drink one night a week, and If I'm not going out (and obviously that was the case for a long time recently - until "bubbles" were brought in) then I'll have said drinks by myself at home. It's very enjoyable. Similar amount to Andrea above. And yes, agree with Delilah - it's one of life's great pleasures with a movie or good TV show.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117993282#Comment_117993282

This is a kind of sad post.

Parachutes

We have a different relationship with alcohol than the rest of the world, even countries like Britain or other eastern euro places which are renowned for drinking. I’ve had nights out where I’ve drank so much that in any other country you’d probably be sectioned, but shur it’s all just a bit of craic and everyone is at it, but of a sore head in the morning and you get on with life, likewise I might have a few Guinness the odd evening because I really enjoy Guinness. Never once thought I had a problem or was an alcoholic, that’s all new age nonsense from America.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117942599#Comment_117942599

Isn't the judging usually done in relation to when it's affecting the drinkers' health though?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117995801#Comment_117995801

Not in the case of the OP, apparently.

JupiterKid

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117995311#Comment_117995311

There is just so much wrong in this post in terms of ignorance and denial that I don’t know where to even begin...

Recovering alcoholic myself, nearly 3 years sober at this stage. I would have made a post with a similar opinion about a decade ago when my own drinking was spiraling out of control.

Strumms

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117995311#Comment_117995311

Then again there are people and cultures who drink daily and as many or as more units per week..

the french even it’s not looked down on to have a couple of glasses of wine with your lunch in the canteen and go back working... the global organization I worked for there had bottles of wine beside the cokes.

Parachutes

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117997200#Comment_117997200

Well that’s your experience, not necessarily me or anyone else.

Apart from culture, there’s a lot of genetics involved in alcoholism, and like a selection of other areas in the world, Ireland seems to have a generous distribution of these genes.

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/04/190402124314.htm

It’s not that enjoying a drink on one’s own leads to alcoholism per se, but that people affected by alcohol use disorder will inevitably drink on their own if they get any alone time to drink. They will seek that alone time whenever possible or when social drinking opportunities (where others are drinking a fair bit too) are denied as there will be nobody there to pass comment on how much is being consumed. The predisposition is already there, although I have heard it said by medical scientists that starting heavy drinking young increases the chances even in those less predisposed as the brain is still developing.

My great-great grandfather died of alcoholism in his 30s, leaving a widow and family. His son, my great-grandfather, took his first drink in his twenties and was noted to say “I liked that way too much, that’s my first and last drink or I will turn into my late father”. Wisely he never did touch another drop and spent his life running the business empire his widowed mother had created in desperation to feed her children.