You are together 5 years, what's the relationship like in general? Do you see the uncaring nature towards the dog as a red flag to a darker side of his personality? I don't have animals but there's something in the back of my mind that "working dogs" won't necessarily be brought indoors? Is his background one that had "working dogs"......I appreciate i could be completely wrong there which is why I directed you to the pet forum .
Sandi2472 wrote: » "You are together 5 years, what's the relationship like in general? Do you see the uncaring nature towards the dog as a red flag to a darker side of his personality? I don't have animals but there's something in the back of my mind that "working dogs" won't necessarily be brought indoors? Is his background one that had "working dogs"......I appreciate i could be completely wrong there which is why I directed you to the pet forum ." Generally we get on well .I m quite laid back anyway.he comes from a traditional Irish family.so yes I get that a lot of dogs were kept outside We are both in our 50s ,we both have children . from previous relationship s .I think he tends to go along with what his children want . but clearly loves them though The dog has a kennel . fully waterproof He doesn't want to move the dog to his house as he doesn't like dogs on furniture etc
Sandi2472 wrote: » Hi first time posting I v been with my b/f 5 year s .we don't live together.we generally get on well but I have a issue with how he looks after his dog .I am a animal lover .all my pets live in the house.buy them treats etc .they are part of the family His dog lives outside at a different house to him.he goes round to feed the dog twice a day I have asked if I can have the dog as I feel 1 the dog shouldn't sleep outside when it's -4 etc 2 the dog must be lonely . But he's unwilling to let me This probably seems like a trivial issue ,but it's upsetting for me Any advice ?
Princess Calla wrote: » I presume the dog lives with the ex wife and kids s .
Sandi2472 wrote: » The dog belonged to a relative who passed away. He spends a hour or so a day in the house with the dog .and occasionally the house is occupied for the weekend so the dog sleeps inside then.
Airyfairy12 wrote: » Your post is a bit confusing, first you said all your pets live inside then you said you dont have animals. Personally I wouldnt agree with leaving a dog outside, even with a kennel, its just cruel as far as im concerned. Im confused as to what you mean by a working dog? Is it a sheep dog or something? If he doesnt want a dog in the house and cant clear out a shed and put in some insulation for the dog to sleep in, why have a dog at all? That dog could be so much happier in a loving home, even an animal shelter would provide more for him than your boyfriend. Does he bring the dog for walks? Is the dog socialised? How long has he had it? does he bring it for vet visits & checkups?
Airyfairy12 wrote: » Your post is a bit confusing, first you said all your pets live inside then you said you dont have animals. Personally I wouldnt agree with leaving a dog outside, even with a kennel, its just cruel as far as im concerned. ?
Sandi2472 wrote: » Sorry for the confusion .it is a odd situation I have pets at my house cats ,dogs No it's not a working dog .no he doesn't go for walks but he does have a large garden to run round .goes to the vet for his routine vaccination s. I think he feels a connection to the dog as it belonged to a very close relative
Airyfairy12 wrote: » Could you buy a shed or something? Put some insulation into it and a dog basket? Or is there a room in the house the dog could be kept in at night? Like the hall or something? I wouldnt be able to sleep knowing the dog was outside freezing cold.
Dial Hard wrote: » Sorry, but none of that is even good enough. Dogs are social animals who need to be part of a pack (human or canine), not left alone for 23 hours a day, every day, regardless of how cosy they are. How long has this been going on, OP?
Sandi2472 wrote: » B/f doesn't know if the dog would be happy with me ie inside and taken for walks.
Antares35 wrote: » Awful set up for the dog. Dogs are social animals and suffer greatly if isolated. Not to mention the harsh weather conditions in Ireland. Have you tried to talk to him? Why can't he surrender the animal to you? Would be a deal breaker for me.
Sandi2472 wrote: » Yes I v tried talking to him but he won't budge at the moment.he says maybe one day but that's no good to the dog
Dial Hard wrote: » How long has the dog been in this situation?
Zebrag wrote: » I draw the line here when I hear people say they leave their dogs outside. Whether it's an "out door dog" (whatever that means) or fully trained, leaving your dog outside constantly doesn't scream dog lover to me. It screams laziness and can't be physically bothered to look after the dog but will gladly say they have a dog, for the sake of it. Either you love your dog or you're not capible of caring for a dog. Your boyfriend sounds like he either doesn't own the dog or if worst case he does but just feels obliged to just have the responsibility to fed it and that's that. Dogs aren't like humans but they can suffer too. Long term isolation is a form of mistrust to an animal and quiet frankly it sounds like your boyfriend doesn't give two fiddlers. It doesn't matter if the kennel is waterproof or wind proof or even fart proof. Irish weather, especially now, is hardly survivable. To leave a dog outside constantly is just crazy to me. I've had 2 dogs in my lifetime and the most they go outside is for a walk and maybe an hour or two out the back for play times (you know how they are like with birds) and often they've just liked to go outside to lie on the ground in the sun. But it wouldn't occure to me to leave the dogs outside for hours on end expecting them to entertain themselves until I felt necessary to give 2 minutes attention. This isn't a relationship problem as such seeing as you've been with him for 5 years, more like a pet peeve (no pun) and it seems like now you've reached your limit. If it's not his dog then you've no say. If it is his dog and you've given all resources to help so far as offering to take the dog then I would really think about telling him that it's something that could be reported as neglet if it is a case of him only seeing the dog just to feed them and then leaving them outside for 23 hours a day
Antares35 wrote: » I agree with all of this. However on the point of neglect, it's actually a real bug bear of mine that it's a very high threshold in this country. Once an animal has shelter and access to food etc there is very little that the law can do. I know of a dog in a similar situation and it kills me but reporting it will just píss the owner off and who knows what he would do to the dog then, but it doesn't meet the "neglect" or "abuse" standard. It's ridiculous
