People who tell you how honest they are

SilentBee

lol I used to work with a lad like this. All his sentences started with a "believe you me mate" followed by the most ridiculous **** you can think of. good times.

Church on Tuesday

dxhound2005 wrote: »

A lot of posts have TBH in them, which I find strange. Why do they need to state they are being honest? Worse again is TBF which is usually followed by some biased statement.

Just a turn of phrase TBF.

PhilOssophy

CrabRevolution wrote: »

"With all due respect..." followed by a deranged rant showing no respect.

Beat me to it...."With respect...." followed by exactly what you say.

gozunda

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Just a turn of phrase TBF.

True - there's a lot of in-built redundancy in everyday language. Speech or text can look quite stark without it

PhilOssophy

Is there anything to be said for "at the end of the day"?

.anon.

gozunda wrote: »

True - there's a lot of in-built redundancy in everyday language. Speech or text can look quite stark without it

Sure this is it. You know yourself.

Cee-Jay-Cee

Iscreamkone wrote: »

"You can trust me, my brother's a priest."
My first instincts were correct - this individual did not turn out to be trustworthy.

Better still " You can trust me, my father was a priest"

Arghus

Loads of straight shooters here on boards, according to themselves anyway.

py2006

** wrong thread

McGinniesta

McGinniesta wrote: »

I don't like people. I have no real interest in making other people happy or sad.

I'm not a sociopath or a psycho but I have no interest in cushioning other people from the truth.

If I don't like someone then they'll be told straight to their face. I'd be so much happier if other did the same to me.

I have a different opinion to yourself when it comes to other people. I do like them and care about my impact on them. But I like the realness of your post. Authenticity with who we are is far far greater than platitudes and faux empathy.

Boards can be a really kind and supportive place at times. I've read posts from people going through a tough time and thought how lovely it was to see encouraging responses. I've done so myself. Yet I just wonder. It can feel like a bandwagon. One person offers sympathy, then everyone else does because they will feel rubbish to be the only person not.

I know people care of course and am aware how cynical my post must seem. It's just all the "thoughts and prayers* stuff makes me question the authenticity and the intent.

In saying all of that I haven't a clue what another's internal self is and shouldn't speculate on the intent of their message. After all I have reached out on here and done so from a place of giving a fùck about that person so why should others be different?

cannotlogin

I'm a straight shooter roughly translates to I've the emotional intelligence of a two year old, lack empathy, am blunt and aggressive, cannot compromise, think I'm always right and my opinion is the only one worth listening to, am arrogant and ignorant in equal measures and am an all round twat.

KaneToad

GreeBo wrote: »

Anything that anybody tells you about themselves is typically a lie.

No one who is actually "kind, honest, caring, brave, outspoken, etc, etc" actually has to bother to say that to people.

Anyone who tells people these things is to be avoided.

This is Facebook, in a nutshell.
"Look at me, how I want you to see me..."

cannotlogin

cannotlogin wrote: »

I'm a straight shooter roughly translates to I've the emotional intelligence of a two year old, lack empathy, am blunt and aggressive, cannot compromise, think I'm always right and my opinion is the only one worth listening to, am arrogant and ignorant in equal measures and am an all round twat.

"You don't want to cross me"


*rolls eyes*

dxhound2005

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Just a turn of phrase TBF.

gozunda wrote: »

True - there's a lot of in-built redundancy in everyday language. Speech or text can look quite stark without it

It's a turn of phrase of sorts, but it is telling the reader that there is no other opinion allowed except the one which is claimed to be fair. When it is accompanied by a statement which is unfair e.g. "TBF all Yanks are thick" it is not the proper turn of phrase.

Something like IMO (but certainly not TBH) would be better, and I do agree that without some of these turns of phrase text can look stark.

gozunda

dxhound2005 wrote: »

It's a turn of phrase of sorts, but it is telling the reader that there is no other opinion allowed except the one which is claimed to be fair. When it is accompanied by a statement which is unfair e.g. "TBF all Yanks are thick" it is not the proper turn of phrase.

Something like IMO (but certainly not TBH) would be better, and I do agree that without some of these turns of phrase text can look stark.

Well an obvious remedy to this - is to respond with the same use of language to make it an equitable playing field.

So simply start any relevant response using whatever phrase you belive they are using for one upmanship..or gloss over the comment. Whichever is suitable.

That said the normal usage of "tbh" or "tbf' is not literal in my experience

dxhound2005

gozunda wrote: »

Well an obvious remedy to this - is to respond with the same use of language to make it an equitable playing field.

So simply start any relevant response using whatever phrase you belive they are using for one upmanship..or gloss over the comment. Whichever is suitable.

That said the normal usage of "tbh" or "tbf' is not literal in my experience

I sometimes respond with "I think your are being unfair", or "Thank you for your honesty". It might wake some of them up.

.anon.

"I'd do anything* for anyone"

*Terms and conditions apply. This depends on my availability, the nature of the request, whether or not I can be arsed and whether or not I can boast about what a good friend I am afterwards. If there's nothing in it for me, I'm afraid you're on your own.

meeeeh

'I'm a good person...' Usually said by someone who has nothing but bad things to say about others. You either are good person or you are not no need to advertise it.

Capt'n Midnight

"The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons,"
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

the purple tin

People that are always going on about how hard they work, run off my feet, I'm a busy man etc. are lazy, workshy spoofers.

Pierrette

"I am genuinely proud of all of you"

.anon.

.anon. wrote: »

"I'd do anything* for anyone"

*Terms and conditions apply. This depends on my availability, the nature of the request, whether or not I can be arsed and whether or not I can boast about what a good friend I am afterwards. If there's nothing in it for me, I'm afraid you're on your own.

I'm wary of people who say that or frame themselves to be so very giving and kind. None of us are perfect and we all have undesirable parts. I think it's important to be honest with who we are and own those less pleasant aspects of ourselves. Now I don't mean we give in to those aspects but instead recognise that we are not all 100% good and loving.

Boundaries are really important so when a person claims that they "do anything for anyone" I can't help but wonder about that. At what cost to your own wellbeing would you? And if you didn't care about the cost then why? There are those who act out of their own need. On the surface it seems giving but it is feeding their own lack of self worth.

There is a difference between helping another person from a true place of care for them, for their humanity, and doing so because it fills your gaps.

chrissb8

"I never miss a thing" I can usually think of a handful of things a person has missed when people say that.

nofools

IAMAMORON wrote: »

.

I have only ever slept with a handful of men, I am not a slut.

Prefer the company of honest self titled sluts myself.

kowloon

"Fair is fair", something I've heard before someone tries to present you with a lopsided deal.
"Fair's fair, you clean down the house and I'll put away the broom when you're done".

ILoveYourVibes

I am equally aware of people who let it all hang out though as if that is acceptable too.

I can forgive a little mask wearing. I mean its like putting clothes on before you leave the house.

We don't need to know everything about you.

There is a balance though. An overly projected self is too self conscious.

I don't judge too much though.

I think adults say people will judge you on your actions. I mean no one really ever takes something someone says about themselves seriously.

Projecting yourself overly and in an angelic way isn't really good manners either.

I think i have a tendency to do it. Or i did in my teens etc ...perhaps i was seeking peer acceptance not sure.


I still catch myself virtue signalling all the time. There is no malice in it though i feel.

I think i am a people pleaser. So i wish people to think well of me.

Just because there is a mask doesn't mean there is a demon behind it.

Funny thing is when someone shows their true face ....most people don't run.

If people don't HEED the warnings of authenticity ..there is very little point to it.

ILoveYourVibes

Pierrette wrote: »

"I am genuinely proud of all of you"

No one has ever said that of me ...............this gives me hope!

tdf7187

suicide_circus wrote: »

"You know me, I'm a straight shooter"

I have a colleague in work who consistently stirs the excrement at every opportunity and always prefaces it with something along the lines of; "I don't do drama, as you know" :rolleyes:

Do you know anyone like this who doth protest too much? Do these people realise how transparent they are?

Yes. Also people who tell you within seconds of meeting you that they don't like gossip are of course almost invariably gossips. "I don't like to gossip but...." "Keep this to yourself if you don't mind..." etc. Mainly but by no means exclusively female. Some males can be as bad.

Zico

Honestly this is bull****.

ILoveYourVibes

Zico wrote: »

Honestly this is bull****.

I know what you mean.

Don't read too much into it though. There is a little truth to it.