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Grandparents and child

  • 07-07-2020 10:33pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 62 ✭✭✭ TheShockmaster


    I just wanted to quickly gauge people’s opinion on a predicament I have at the moment. My parents are 69, soon to be 70, and are generally in good health, though my father has had heart issues in the past. Since lockdown began they have not seen my son (almost 2), obviously they are broken hearted by it. We all are, but I am protective of my parents health. I am confident that the research suggests that should my son get it, he would be ok.

    Now there is an issue with children of his age being unable to socially distance themselves and my parents are desperate to see him, partly because seemingly everyone they know has been seeing their grandkids, thus increasing their unhappiness and the pressure on me to allow it.

    Should I just let them see him? Has the issue of grandparents access been in any way discussed let alone resolved? I feel like I’ve been put in an awkward position by people not following the rules, and as much as I want them to see my son, I would rather it happen when I had more of an easy mind about it.

    Opinions appreciated.


Comments

  • Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 5,353 Mod ✭✭✭✭ spockety


    Depends on what your own behaviour has been like over the last 2 weeks before you see them, in my opinion. This is in terms of how many people you have come into contact with and in what situations they have been in etc.

    I think at this stage if you've been careful yourself (and by association, your kid), with covid almost effectively eradicated in the community it's probably as safe as it has been since the start.


  • Registered Users Posts: 65 ✭✭ Gemancy


    spockety wrote: »
    Depends on what your own behaviour has been like over the last 2 weeks before you see them, in my opinion. This is in terms of how many people you have come into contact with and in what situations they have been in etc.

    I think at this stage if you've been careful yourself (and by association, your kid), with covid almost effectively eradicated in the community it's probably as safe as it has been since the start.


    Agreed.

    My in laws have started calling to our home again to see our 3 smallies. I remind them of the risks, they make their own decision after that. At some point we need to weigh the risk/lack of fulfilment of staying at home living our lives looking through the window versus accepting the COVID risk, taking all the sensible precautions we can and try to live as normally as possible.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭ the corpo


    Luke O'Neill was asked this very question yesterday, and says it's almost certainly fine, though all should try and wear masks and try and respect as much social distance as possible. Even a quick hug is fine, but just keep on your toes with handwashing etc.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,654 ✭✭✭ Quantum Erasure


    Its safer now in the last few weeks than it will be in a couple months time


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,132 ✭✭✭ daithi7




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  • Registered Users Posts: 7 ✭✭✭ Engineering112


    There is absolutely nothing wrong with grandparents seeing grandchildren as long they and the parents have been behaving themselves.


  • Registered Users Posts: 7 ✭✭✭ Engineering112


    Gemancy wrote: »
    Agreed.

    My in laws have started calling to our home again to see our 3 smallies. I remind them of the risks, they make their own decision after that. At some point we need to weigh the risk/lack of fulfilment of staying at home living our lives looking through the window versus accepting the COVID risk, taking all the sensible precautions we can and try to live as normally as possible.

    It does depend on your social activities and those of your in laws. if you and the inlaws adhered to the lockdown and present restrictions all is fine.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators, Regional North Mods, Regional West Moderators Posts: 81,470 Mod ✭✭✭✭ biko


    There is a small risk, but tbh if you take precautions then I'm sure it will be fine.
    Use hand sanitiser, gloves and masks etc.


  • Registered Users Posts: 68,333 ✭✭✭✭ seamus


    It's up to each individual to decide on what their comfort level is.

    If your parents are happy with the level of risk that this exposes them to, and you are happy with the level of risk it exposes your children to (it sounds like you are), then fire away.

    You might determine the "level of risk" is zero. That's up to you.

    That's really all anyone can do during this. We keep our distance from strangers because we have no idea where they've been. We may keep our distance from friends, even family, because we don't know where they've been.

    But if we know where someone has been and how safe they have been, then you can make an informed decision on whether you are happy to mix with them without social distancing.

    Our kids still distance from their grandparents, for example, because they're mixing with their mates outside.


  • Registered Users Posts: 7 ✭✭✭ Engineering112


    Yes by all means ensure kids are distancing themselves from grandparents if they are mixing with other kids but many children have been isolating in their own homes in countryside locations for months with no exposure to any child expect siblings living with them who too have isolated so there is no absolutely no risk at all.

    Infact where I live is Covid free. The risk is not from those living in my city it is people coming from other parents of Ireland especially Dublin. Most new cases are there I have been told.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 144 ✭✭ comerla


    We're having the same discussion here at the moment.

    One of my kids has just taken up doing martial arts - (basically full contact training with token hand sanitization - this is still not safe if the virus is still doing the rounds), gymnastics, summer camps etc. Suddenly all of these things are ok now?

    My parents haven't seen the kids since February and were planning on coming down to us for Saturday night. We're trying to assess how much risk exists through the kids contacts.


  • Registered Users Posts: 65 ✭✭ Gemancy


    It does depend on your social activities and those of your in laws. if you and the inlaws adhered to the lockdown and present restrictions all is fine.

    Exactly as I said, taking all sensible precautions... :cool:


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,088 ✭✭✭ LadyMayBelle


    We have this with our 2.5yr old. All four grandparents are thankfully healthy and aged 59-65 BUT we continue to social distance. We agreed last week that quick hugs were ok and relaxed a bit on the sharing of a ball, or toy. We don't see anyone else bar those 4 people right now. Gotta ensure everyone has clean hands and have asked grandparents to limit the face up close time, and to distance best they can outside playful hugs etc.

    We continue to do outdoor visits tho as again there still is a risk and you have to weigh each person's risk and behavior (what levels they adhere to the guidance) and it's not been an easy decision. Especially hard when it can feel like everyone else has changed and physical distancing disappeared for many. We are out playing in a field while lots of people are indoors having dinners together!

    Altho in reality we are just doing what the advice says- physically distancing, outdoor visits. Try have grandparents focus on what they CAN do with the 2 yr old..run about, kick ball, look at flowers, funny games as opposed to what they they cannot...that helped us..plus tbh at that age it's easier manage outside!


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