Dumb/Great Facebook Status [No Names] - Part III

Ted_YNWA

Original thread here: https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057422698

Last thread hit 10k posts so needed to be closed.



Main rule - No personally identifiable information

Let the weird, wonderful & wacky (and whatever 'w' you're having yourself) statuses continue.

tea and coffee

"Im in need for a bby doll lego and a car set sumladys runners size 4 boys runners size."

Not entirely sure it is what is being requested here tbh.

Foweva Awone

In a Slimming World group, someone asked is there any food/drink that people just won't give up? One of the responses:

"I love cock and will never give it up think it tastes better than Pepsi max I only have one serving per day though I'm not gready"

Hotblack Desiato

Have a cock and a smile :pac:

seagull

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

Have a cock and a smile :pac:

Sounds like someone she knows has both.

SusieBlue

This is my face, I pulled an all nighter just gaming Fortnite with English and American People how I don't have black bags Man I'm bate now, being a gamer and a Streamer is not an easy job As I don't have a real job at the moment I'm hoping streaming will be my job I should get paid and I'm not a NOOB no more I'm more average and half pro now

1800_Ladladlad

Not FB but twitter

Talking to the owner of my local Chinese and he says that business has plummeted since news of the Coronavirus. Are people FOR REAL!?
If you have the means, please order a Chinese takeaway from your local this week 🙏🏼
A VIRUS DOES NOT HAVE A RACE!

The faux sensitive activism and melodramatic awareness. I find it difficult to take someone serious who has pronouns in their bio :rolleyes:

Samsgirl

Just in case and even if it is a hoax I am still posting....

Recommended by a solicitor.
Please note: Facebook is now a public entity. All members must post a note like this.
If you have not published a statement at least once, it will be technically understood that you allow the use of your photos, as well as the information contained in your profile status updates.
I declare that I haven't given permission for Facebook to use my pictures, or any of the information contained in my profile or my updates, or my statuses!
Make: copy - paste! (now your finger on the text, click copy, post, and paste. )
Don't share!



If I see this crap again.... People who I thought were far more intelligent than they obviously are keep sharing this.

tea and coffee

Does anyone know what the buyer was looking for in my post?! (I don't)

inforfun

tea and coffee wrote: »

Does anyone know what the buyer was looking for in my post?! (I don't)

Baby doll (whether that is lingerie or a doll in the shape of a bay, i cant tell you), lego, a car set, some lady runners (suppose shoes women use to run in), and her son must run with her because another pair of runners is requested and the boy has size 4.

That is my guess.

Hotblack Desiato

What's a "car set" though?

colm_mcm

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

What's a "car set" though?

It’s a set you put your bby into in the bck of the cr

inforfun

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

What's a "car set" though?

I was thinking a set of toy cars.

But colm_mcm's "car seat" makes more sense, considering the fact that about 0 words were spelled right in that post.

AndyBoBandy

“Don’t forget tomorrow starts the new Facebook rule where they can use your photos. Don't forget the Deadline is today!!! It can be used in court cases in litigation against you. Everything you've ever posted becomes public from today - even messages that have been deleted. It costs nothing for a simple copy and paste, better safe than sorry.

I do not give Facebook or any entities associated with Facebook permission to use my pictures, information, messages or posts, both past and future. With this statement, I give notice to Facebook it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute, or take any other action against me based on this profile and/or its contents. The content of this profile is private and confidential information. The violation of privacy can be punished by law NOTE: Facebook is now a public entity. All members must post a note like this.

If you prefer, you can copy and paste this version. If you do not publish a statement at least once it will be tacitly allowing the use of your photos, as well as the information contained in the profile status updates. DO NOT SHARE. Copy and paste.

Their new algorithm chooses the same few people - about 25 - who will read your posts.

Therefore:
Hold your finger down anywhere in this post and "copy" will pop up. Click "copy". Then go to your page, start a new post and put your finger anywhere in the blank field. "Paste" will pop up and click paste
This will bypass the system.

I DO NOT GIVE FACEBOOK PERMISSION TO SHARE ANYTHING OF MINE., THAT I HAVE PUT ON THEIR SITE, . PICTURES, CURRENT OR PAST POSTS, PHONE NUMBERS OR EMAILS.. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING CAN BE USED IN ANY FORM WITHOUT MY WRITTEN PERMISSION OR VERBAL CONSENT.

Thank You.”




Dodged a bullet there eh!!

optogirl

Underneath the World Health Org live broadcast

'Does that mean if it was man made it was spread dilibertly.?'

mackeire

Anyone no election 2 fit spot lights ? Thanks

benjamin d

optogirl wrote: »

...it was spread Dilbertly.?'

He'll do anything to avoid work, that lad

Samsgirl

Fix each others crowns 👑 ladies... Don't knock them off 😘💜 #girlpower if I tagged you, don't disappoint me. If I didnt tag you, please no offence. I tried to choose people I thought would make this challenge fun!! Too often, women find it easier to criticise each other instead of building each other up. With all the negativity out there, lets do something positive 🌟 Upload 1 picture of yourself... Just you!! Then tag so many beautiful women (FB will only allow 50) we will build ourselves up, instead of tearing us apart 💋💜💋💜 copy and paste... I got tagged !!


Tagged 7 times in one of these ridiculous posts!!

inforfun

And.... feel build up yet?

De Bhál

Why was he aloud out of prison in the first place?

aoh

Hi guys meet teddy hes 7 year old laberdoodle
teddy owners have surenderd him as change in family circumstances

NO NEGATIVE COMMENTS

teddy likes long walks swimming loves the car gets on with other dogs
Teddy is very bouncy an will only be rehomed with older children he will love a home with some one home during the day as dont like being left alone if u think u can offer him a home please pm my self hes hair longer now theses pics are older ones
home checks apply

Ever heard of a comma?!?!??!

inforfun

Teddy wrote that himself in the 3rd person.
Be kind to Teddy

mackeire

Loking for lock Smith K now anyone who dose house calls in balleyfermod please

pinkyeye

Don't know how to link FB here but I saw a post which basically went as follows:

"what if we all have to isolate ourselves and I have prepay electricity and I can't get credit and my heating is electric so I'll freeze to death."

Loughc

pinkyeye wrote: »

Don't know how to link FB here but I saw a post which basically went as follows:

"what if we all have to isolate ourselves and I have prepay electricity and I can't get credit and my heating is electric so I'll freeze to death."

I expect to see many more of these stupid posts relating to Coronavirus over the coming days, c'mon boards don't let me down, share the wealth!

Plopsu

mackeire wrote: »

Loking for lock Smith K now anyone who dose house calls in balleyfermod please

Well, I do know a locksmith but they don't do house calls; you have to bring the door into the shop.

Wellyd

Someone on Facebook looking for holiday home lettings. Someone commented underneath

“Deffo wreck amend” a certain company

Turquoise Hexagon Sun

1800_Ladladlad wrote: »

Not FB but twitter



The faux sensitive activism and melodramatic awareness. I find it difficult to take someone serious who has pronouns in their bio :rolleyes:

Oh god, I had to Google the quote. Scrolling down and there's "if you follow this person on Twitter, it's a kick in the teeth for me" in reference to Graham Linehan and retweeted "I've had to stop following people I like because they follow people I disagree with" nonsense. Nothing worse that Twatter activists.

Foweva Awone

"I'm looking for a secondhand curling thong if anyone has one they're not using"

Leg End Reject

Foweva Awone wrote: »

"I'm looking for a secondhand curling thong if anyone has one they're not using"

It would be well worn if it was curling!

764dak

https://i.redd.it/6luoihlpnnh31.jpg

optogirl

764dak wrote: »

https://i.redd.it/6luoihlpnnh31.jpg

I am very confused

Deebles McBeebles

Infini-fat. Love it.

It wasnt me123

optogirl wrote: »

I am very confused

Picture of the girl wasn't fat enough for the other fat ones

Mollyb60

Someone on my feed yesterday described the condition "carpool tunnel". I'm still trying to figure out if it was a joke or they actually think it's spelled that way. Or if it was autocorrect on their phone maybe?

Hotblack Desiato

Deebles McBeebles wrote: »

Infini-fat. Love it.

Yeah, I'm thinking fake.

Pherekydes

764dak wrote: »

https://i.redd.it/6luoihlpnnh31.jpg

Is this a dumb or a great Facebook post?

Redneck Reject71

It wasnt me123 wrote: »

Picture of the girl wasn't fat enough for the other fat ones

Pretty bad when your fat but can't fit in with the fat club,heh.

padd b1975

Few cold ones and a win in cheleham wath more could ye ask for.

Neyite

"Here's a recipe for non-toxic homemade sanitisier:

1 cup apple cider vinegar
some drops of essential oils such as tea tree oil"

mackeire

USE DETOL REED BK INSTUCTON SAYS KILLS THIS VIRUS

Hotblack Desiato

padd b1975 wrote: »

Few cold ones and a win in cheleham wath more could ye ask for.

Spelling? And a coronavirus vaccine

Foweva Awone

"Pls god and our blessed mother keep us al safe from the corn virus it's getting scary my anxiety and panic attacks are so bad loves my girls so so much I wouldn't know wat I do without them loves my babies keep them safe"

That corn virus is nasty stuff :P

buckwheat

Did anyone else have the really bad flu around Xmas, it lasted for weeks and literally couldn't move. You'd feel better and then boom it would hit you again. I had it and my lungs hurt when Is breath it was that bad, I remember saying to my friends I think I have pneumonia. And I couldn't get a Dr's app 😂Well now this random man in Cork has the virus, no connection to travel or anyone that's tested positive, how do we know we all didn't already have it, we were never tested. At a time when people were travelling to see family it could have been spread for weeks before it was discovered. I'm not normally a crazy conspiracy theorist but it makes you think 🙈 Everyone freaking out and we are probably all already immune to it 😂 COPIED

Make you think

SusieBlue

Someone messaged me saying I've the Coronavirus that everyone is saying all around that I have it bahahahaha fukc ye cause I don't have it when I'm in my home nearly 24 hours a day so if I was out I be seen on camera and seen by people
talk about me and accuse me all ye want but get yer facts right 1st accusing someone is worse than me ever mentioning anyone's name on Facebook but if y'all want me to get my old doctor or a paramedic to call to my house right now and do a ****ing Coronavirus test no ****ing bother
I'll get one of the lads in this town his dad works for the hse he knows me very well and knows out of my family I am not the fittest but most certainly the healthiest one of them will take a test on me Tonight get the results on paper hand it to me to confirm
I've no such ****ing virus I'm not sick at all that I've the best health anyone could ask for and be thankful and blessed no matter what life ****ing throws at me so to all ye trolls and backstabbers come say it to my ****ing face BECAUSE I WILL PUNCH YE IN THE FACE FOR ACCUSE ME I'D BELT MY EXTENSION LEADS OFF YER FACES AND BREAK YER JAWS ENOUGH IS ENOUGH BUT SAY IT TO MY FACE THAT I'VE ANY VIRUS OR ANYTHING I DARE YE TO BECAUSE WHEN YE DO I BE BOXING THE **** OUT OF YE COWARDS OF TROLLS NO ONE STANDS UP FOR ME WHEN Y'ALL TROLL ME HERES ONE FOR YE WHAT GOES AROUND COMES BACK AROUND WATCH YER BACKS KARMA IS NEVER TOO FAR AWAY



Dog lady providing some comic relief in these troubled times.

normanoffside

The government shud of first and foremost got masks and gloves delivered 2 every household in the country for FREE!! But no instead €155 ereo for a pack of masks and 10 ereo for a tiny lil bottle of sanitiser like who has dat kinda money??? #backtofrontcountry as long as they the (government) r safe dey don't care don't care bout any1 else!! #fact they still allow planes to come and go like wtf?? Do dey actually care?? People gone mad wit the food anal being pure gready. Some poor people got no baby food or bread milk while others bought maybe 10 tins of baby food and 10 loafs of bread exc.

Niallers87

normanoffside wrote: »

The government shud of first and foremost got masks and gloves delivered 2 every household in the country for FREE!! But no instead €155 ereo for a pack of masks and 10 ereo for a tiny lil bottle of sanitiser like who has dat kinda money??? #backtofrontcountry as long as they the (government) r safe dey don't care don't care bout any1 else!! #fact they still allow planes to come and go like wtf?? Do dey actually care?? People gone mad wit the food anal being pure gready. Some poor people got no baby food or bread milk while others bought maybe 10 tins of baby food and 10 loafs of bread exc.

Food anal!!? I didnt think things had got that bad😂

Notmything

Niallers87 wrote: »

Food anal!!? I didnt think things had got that bad😂

How else do you get food into you when you have to wear a face mask.

Ted_YNWA

It's going out the same way it went in.

Quantum Erasure

I actually cant believe I'm posting this!...��
I've done it, and it's my own fault. I hold my hands up and admit responsibility. All this panic nonsense over the virus. All the shopping done and I forgot the one most vital thing for me and my family to survive this.

COFFEE!!!

I forgot to buy f**king COFFEE!!

Things are going to get crazy round here.��

Oh no ..wait. Sure Supervalu is open. All is grand so.

Almost had a panic attack...until I started thinking logically. Phew! Close call.
Also managed to scrape a cup full out of the jar until I get to the shop.

seagull

Is that last one a piss take on the loo roll maniacs?