How much child maintenance do you pay?

munster87

Fisher High Side wrote: »

150e per week = is 150e per week. Where are you getting 300e per week from?

Where is the madness part?

Deep breaths and think about it.

salmocab

munster87 wrote: »

Deep breaths and think about it.

It’s too late for thinking it’s all fathers faults

Dravokivich

Fisher High Side wrote: »

A pack of smokes per week, yes that’s really a high roller.

I dont smoke. I'm also a single father. On a low wage. You're barking up the wrong tree.

Macdarack

Fisher High Side wrote: »

My understanding is the maximum that can be enforced is €150 per week which is pittance IMO, but I had a conversation with a woman who receives the vastly sum of €15 per week!!! I have my doubts as to whether this is true but if it is, can anyone explain how someone can get away with €15 per week under a court order. She would be better not getting anything in that case because he gets to poke his nose in for his €15.



I know one person who has a 14 yo son and has paid nothing towards his child maintenance for 14 years and thinks that by giving the mother a few bob "cash" at Christmas that he is doing her a favour.

Isn't it time that a minimum level of child maintenance was introduced and actually enforced so that the state is not left to pick up the tab for delinquent fathers?

Just wondering is there another 150 per week been paid by the other parent.? How much does it cost to run a kid these days?

kippy

Macdarack wrote: »

Just wondering is there another 150 per week been paid by the other parent.? How much does it cost to run a kid these days?

If you require childcare 5 days per week, depending on the age of the child, you could be talking about 250 per week alone. Coupled with food, transport, clothing, nappies, etc
Granted as the child gets somewhat older those costs can go down a bit until they hit college where the ramp up again.

Granted that is a conversation outside of the one going on here where the ability to pay and specific circumstances are taken into account.

Dravokivich

Macdarack wrote: »

Just wondering is there another 150 per week been paid by the other parent.? How much does it cost to run a kid these days?

Im not going into exact numbers but more than half my wage is on the kid.

Cork Trucker

Dravokivich wrote: »

Im not going into exact numbers but more than half my wage is on the kid.

One child?

Timberrrrrrrr

My son is 8 years old, currently give my ex £150 per week for maintenance, I also pay half for any clothes, school uniforms, school trips etc. If I went the courtCMS route here I know I could pay a lot less but I know that the money I give her is spent on giving my son a decent quality of life. If I cut that money down to say half then it would impact on him. She has a very well paying job too but for me it's ensuring that he has what he needs and I contribute to that.

neonsofa

TheMilkyPirate wrote: »

150e per week is pittance according to you? For one child?

That's 300e a week to raise a child? Madness.

That wouldn't even cover the cost of childcare, which allows me to earn what it costs to raise the child- accommodation, bills, food, etc.

MayoSalmon

Timberrrrrrrr wrote: »

My son is 8 years old, currently give my ex £150 per week for maintenance, I also pay half for any clothes, school uniforms, school trips etc. If I went the courtCMS route here I know I could pay a lot less but I know that the money I give her is spent on giving my son a decent quality of life. If I cut that money down to say half then it would impact on him. She has a very well paying job too but for me it's ensuring that he has what he needs and I contribute to that.

What 8 year old needs 200 euro a week to be maintained

Timberrrrrrrr

MayoSalmon wrote: »

What 8 year old needs 200 euro a week to be maintained

He has nice clothes, they rent a decent sized house with a garden (that's important imo) he is a member of several clubs/sports activities that cost weekly (that's before uniforms/kits etc) I also have a bank account set up for him.that I deposit £20 a week into, has his own debit card (no unsupervised use) where he is learning to save for things he wants and teaches him the value of money and the importance of saving. For this money he has small jobs around both houses that he must complete to earn it.

aaakev

My eldest daughter is 15 (not my biological daughter) her dad is a complete waister and paid €35 a week up until she was 7 then took my wife (then girlfriend) to court for guardianship and more access. He ended up having to pay €60 a week and got less access than he originally had. He fecked off shortly after never to be heard from again, that's when she was 8. Thankfully we never needed his contribution, my daughter has always had everything she needed the exact same as our other 2 kids.

To the lads who do right by their kids, fair play to you, from my experience you are a minority. My experience being friends and ex friends both male and female living these situations

eviltwin

MayoSalmon wrote: »

What 8 year old needs 200 euro a week to be maintained

That would just about cover after school care for my 10 year old. Kids aren't cheap.

salmocab

aaakev wrote: »

My eldest daughter is 15 (not my biological daughter) her dad is a complete waister and paid €35 a week up until she was 7 then took my wife (then girlfriend) to court for guardianship and more access. He ended up having to pay €60 a week and got less access than he originally had. He fecked off shortly after never to be heard from again, that's when she was 8. Thankfully we never needed his contribution, my daughter has always had everything she needed the exact same as our other 2 kids.

To the lads who do right by their kids, fair play to you, from my experience you are a minority. My experience being friends and ex friends both male and female living these situations

The blokes who do right by their kids aren’t a minority you only think that because you will only hear people complaining about ex’s so your impression will be based on hearing of bad experiences.

aaakev

salmocab wrote: »

The blokes who do right by their kids aren’t a minority you only think that because you will only hear people complaining about ex’s so your impression will be based on hearing of bad experiences.

Yeah I didn't mean for it to sound like that which is why I said from my experience. I do know a few lads who do things right and are excellent providers and parents but the ones I know that aren't are the majority. Again this is only from my experience of people I actually know.

MayoSalmon

aaakev wrote: »

Yeah I didn't mean for it to sound like that which is why I said from my experience. I do know a few lads who do things right and are excellent providers and parents but the ones I know that aren't are the majority. Again this is only from my experience of people I actually know.

Don't take this the wrong way but that says more about the people you know I'm afraid then anything.

aaakev

MayoSalmon wrote: »

Don't take this the wrong way but that says more about the people you know I'm afraid then anything.

I completely agree with you which is why these are the ex friends who I distanced myself from a long time ago

nthclare

Its nobody's business really only between the payer and the receiver.

I pay maintenance myself and it is what the courts decided, I was told 50 euros a week for my lad and he's nearly 19 now and finished school next June.
I give him 30 euros on a Friday for himself and give him an extra 20 a month for his 3 call credit.
Buy his dinners at weekends if he's with me etc gi

Buy him the odd 12 inch vinyl as he loves music, drive him to Galway now and again.

Its more about being there for them and being supportive etc

Its all about love rather than money....

pjcpolly

I'm divorced with 3 kids....my ex through a court order pays €35 per wk for 3 kids. Nothing extra for christmas or schooling...before the court order all he paid was half of christmas and half of schooling.
He is not working but gets disability and insurance payment through work (just as much as what i get on a TCO wage).....also remarried and has had plenty of holidays through the year.
Asked for him to give the kids pocket money ....... he refused!!! Claimed it was for me to support what I do with my kids....which is not the case. It is for the kids to do what they wish to do with it.....and yes it does help me not having to fork out every time they want to go somewhere with their friends as they are young teenagers!!!

Not on here to moan...just giving a bit of insight in to how it can be for the single parent with the kids all the time!!!!!!!!

Dravokivich

Cork Trucker wrote: »

One child?

Yeah. But with all the directions he comes at me from, you'd swear it was 10 :P

v638sg7k1a92bx

One eyed Jack wrote: »

You’re not being asked to accept anything though. Your initial post was concerned with introducing a minimum child maintenance payment, and when it was explained that access and maintenance aren’t related, now you’re arguing that fathers aren’t made to pay enough maintenance because they can still afford a certain lifestyle. The Courts take all these circumstances into consideration in making their decisions already. Nobody has to be personally answerable to you, in the same way as you’re not being asked to accept anything, neither does anyone have to accept anything you say.

The same reasoning you use to criticise fathers on minimum wage who aren’t in your opinion properly providing financially for their children, are equally applicable to mothers who aren’t providing properly financially for their children. It simply stands to reason that a person provides for their children according to their means in any given circumstances as determined by the Courts with the best interests of the child as the primary concern. The parents employment status, their ability to provide financially for their children, their custodial responsibility and guardianship and access are only some of the criteria among many, that are considered by the Courts in determining what course of action is acting in the best interests of the child.

Again, because nobody is answerable to you personally, they don’t have to justify anything to you. You’re trying to make a point that fathers should be made to pay a minimum amount for their children, and while you personally aren’t willing to consider their means, the Courts do, so nobody is “getting away” with anything, neither in 2011 or now. That’s why you really don’t have a point worth entertaining tbh, because nobody here is under any obligation to furnish you with the details of their personal circumstances in order for you to pass judgment upon them. Nobody here has to bestow upon you an authority that you simply don’t have, the Courts already have that authority to make decisions so nobody needs to explain themselves to you or offer you personally any justifications whatsoever for their lifestyles.

Put simply - it’s none of your business what anyone else pays in maintenance for their children, and nobody is under any obligation to justify themselves to you personally.

Just because the law or the courts decide on something doesn't mean we have to agree with it. Laws are changed and implemented all the time and to a certain degree it is our business because if a father is only €15 pw then the state has to pick up the tab.

You seem very defensive, how much are you paying per week? Just tell us it's no big deal.

v638sg7k1a92bx

nthclare wrote: »

Its nobody's business really only between the payer and the receiver.

I pay maintenance myself and it is what the courts decided, I was told 50 euros a week for my lad and he's nearly 19 now and finished school next June.
I give him 30 euros on a Friday for himself and give him an extra 20 a month for his 3 call credit.
Buy his dinners at weekends if he's with me etc gi

Buy him the odd 12 inch vinyl as he loves music, drive him to Galway now and again.

Its more about being there for them and being supportive etc

Its all about love rather than money....

It is people's business because if you're not paying sufficient mainteanace then the balance will be paid for via social welfare payments, social housing etc which we all pay into and most of us alot more than €15 pw.

v638sg7k1a92bx

Dravokivich wrote: »

I dont smoke. I'm also a single father. On a low wage. You're barking up the wrong tree.

But are you the primary carer of your children and if you're on minimum wage how would you expect to maintain your kids if you were living together as a family unit?

salmocab

Fisher High Side wrote: »

It is people's business because if you're not paying sufficient mainteanace then the balance will be paid for via social welfare payments, social housing etc which we all pay into and most of us alot more than €15 pw.

That doesn’t make it any of our business

One eyed Jack

Fisher High Side wrote: »

Just because the law or the courts decide on something doesn't mean we have to agree with it. Laws are changed and implemented all the time and to a certain degree it is our business because if a father is only €15 pw then the state has to pick up the tab.

You seem very defensive, how much are you paying per week? Just tell us it's no big deal.

I’m trying to explain to you that the Courts decisions are based upon the individual circumstances in each particular case - some fathers won’t be asked to pay anything given their circumstances, and it may be that the child’s mother will be asked to contribute financially towards the maintenance of their children.

This being the Gentleman’s Club, it stands to reason you were referring only to fathers, and asking how much they pay towards maintaining their children financially. It’s a bit of a “how long is a piece of string?” question, because without knowing their personal circumstances apart from how much they pay in maintenance, there’s no way for you to determine whether or not what anyone is paying is reasonable or not.

€15 may be only the price of a pack of cigarettes to you, but as I said earlier - it’s also the cost of a weeks hot meals for a child. That doesn’t make someone else’s circumstances any more your business than they weren’t already, as you personally aren’t picking up any tab.

With regard to the law, no, you don’t have to agree with them, and parents who refuse to provide for their children have used the same sentiments as though this means they don’t have to abide by Irish law and the decisions of the Court. It’s meaningless though and it doesn’t excuse them of their responsibilities any more than how much anyone pays to maintain their children is any of your business, unless of course they’re your own children and their father is refusing to maintain their children.

v638sg7k1a92bx

One eyed Jack wrote: »

I’m trying to explain to you that the Courts decisions are based upon the individual circumstances in each particular case - some fathers won’t be asked to pay anything given their circumstances, and it may be that the child’s mother will be asked to contribute financially towards the maintenance of their children.

This being the Gentleman’s Club, it stands to reason you were referring only to fathers, and asking how much they pay towards maintaining their children financially. It’s a bit of a “how long is a piece of string?” question, because without knowing their personal circumstances apart from how much they pay in maintenance, there’s no way for you to determine whether or not what anyone is paying is reasonable or not.

€15 may be only the price of a pack of cigarettes to you, but as I said earlier - it’s also the cost of a weeks hot meals for a child. That doesn’t make someone else’s circumstances any more your business than they weren’t already, as you personally aren’t picking up any tab.

With regard to the law, no, you don’t have to agree with them, and parents who refuse to provide for their children have used the same sentiments as though this means they don’t have to abide by Irish law and the decisions of the Court. It’s meaningless though and it doesn’t excuse them of their responsibilities any more than how much anyone pays to maintain their children is any of your business, unless of course they’re your own children and their father is refusing to maintain their children.

I'm sorry but I don't accept that. When the mother goes shopping, does the sales assistant at the check out take into consideration her personal circumstances and reduce the price of the goods accordingly. Similar to minimum mandatory sentences, we can introduce minimum mandatory maintenance payments irrespective of personal circumstances with the exception of the minority of hard cases e.g. invalidity. But this idea of "aww Jaysus I'm on the dole" or I'm only on the minimum wage? I've got two words for those people, learn to type!

Dravokivich

Fisher High Side wrote: »

But are you the primary carer of your children and if you're on minimum wage how would you expect to maintain your kids if you were living together as a family unit?

Yes. What are you getting at with "Family Unit" ?

Fisher High Side wrote: »

It is people's business because if you're not paying sufficient mainteanace then the balance will be paid for via social welfare payments, social housing etc which we all pay into and most of us alot more than €15 pw.

You make it sound like FIS and HAP are just for single parents.

One eyed Jack

Fisher High Side wrote: »

I'm sorry but I don't accept that. When the mother goes shopping, does the sales assistant at the check out take into consideration her personal circumstances and reduce the price of the goods accordingly. Similar to minimum mandatory sentences, we can introduce minimum mandatory maintenance payments irrespective of personal circumstances with the exception of the minority of hard cases e.g. invalidity. But this idea of "aww Jaysus I'm on the dole" or I'm only on the minimum wage? I've got two words for those people, learn to type!

The Courts cannot force anyone to pay maintenance that is beyond their means.

Your example of the mother in the shop is a completely different set of circumstances where she is not being forced to purchase anything which is beyond her means.

v638sg7k1a92bx

One eyed Jack wrote: »

The Courts cannot force anyone to pay maintenance that is beyond their means.

Your example of the mother in the shop is a completely different set of circumstances where she is not being forced to purchase anything which is beyond her means.

On €15pw, many things would be beyond their means.

One eyed Jack

Fisher High Side wrote: »

On €15pw, many things would be beyond their means.

I don’t think anyone is disputing that, that’s just a fact. But the whole point of maintenance is that parents are legally obligated to provide for their children according to their means, and whether it’s €15 or €150 makes no difference in terms of providing for the child’s welfare.