Do you know anyone who was/is homeless?

mr_fegelien

And how did they get out of that situation?

sportsfan90

I've recently moved back in with my parents for a few months.

Many would have you believe that I should be considered homeless.

mr_fegelien

sportsfan90 wrote: »

I've recently moved back in with my parents for a few months.

Many would have you believe that I should be considered homeless.

Where did you stay though before you moved back in?

PhilOssophy

Define "homeless" OP?

Shady Grady

From your posts,closest you came to understanding being homeless.was your mommy and daddy threatening you.You don't know **** about the world so you post these threads.Like I said before grow the **** up.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Didn't you nearly get in that situation a few weeks ago yourself.


You never seem to grasp that life is not simple nor black and white.

There is a myriad of reasons why people become homeless. Even the term 'homeless' is subjective.


Do I know any one? I wouldn't know her well but I am on first name terms with a young girl living rough locally. I only know her enough to buy her breakfast occasionally and chat: her reasons are complicated and for herself alone.

suicide_circus

i would define homeless as not having a key to the door of the place you lay your head at night

mr_fegelien

Shady Grady wrote: »

From your posts,closest you came to understanding being homeless.was your mommy and daddy threatening you.You don't know **** about the world so you post these threads.Like I said before grow the **** up.

U mad bro

I'm asking a question to learn about the world and you're getting mad at me..smh

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

mr_fegelien wrote: »

Where did you stay though before you moved back in?

Why? What does it matter to you? Have you no study to do, or friends to talk to, or music to listen to, or something positive to ponder?
Ever think of volunteering with a charity to help and meet homeless people?

There's a strange voyeurism at play and it needs reigning in.

mr_fegelien

Ava Sticky Robe wrote: »

Why? What does it matter to you? Have you no study to do, or friends to talk to, or music to listen to, or something positive to ponder?
Ever think of volunteering with a charity to help and meet homeless people?

There's a strange voyeurism at play and it needs reigning in.

The reason I ask is because I want to know whether it's abnormal to get kicked out at 21 with no job or formal education and if so, how do people generally fare once kicked out.

suicide_circus

mr_fegelien wrote: »

The reason I ask is because I want to know whether it's abnormal to get kicked out at 21 with no job or formal education and if so, how do people generally fare once kicked out.

it would be extremely unusual for a 21 year old in Ireland to have no education. How would they fare? the state will provide shelter, medical care, education and cash all for nothing

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

mr_fegelien wrote: »

The reason I ask is because I want to know whether it's abnormal to get kicked out at 21 with no job or formal education and if so, how do people generally fare once kicked out.

Of course it's not 'normal' in that it happens a small minority. Why do you ask? Is mammy threatening to turn off the WiFi again?

How they fare depends on the individual. There's no manual on life and very few standardised outcomes to a wealth of situations.

Shady Grady

mr_fegelien wrote: »

U mad bro

I'm asking a question to learn about the world and you're getting mad at me..smh

Nah my brother, I'm not mad just can't understand the weakness and stupidity. It's your life but if you post ****,expect to get reactions.But at your point in life,you should have accomplished more instead of mooching off your parents and acting like a spoiled child,IMO

Ronin247

From citizens information

" In general, you may be considered homeless if you are:

Sleeping rough
Staying in an emergency hostel or refuge
Staying in bed and breakfast or hotel accommodation on a temporary basis
Staying temporarily with friends or family because you have nowhere else to go
Squatting (occupying a building illegally"

I have been in some of the situations above in my time.

I have never once considered myself homeless.

Thousands of people stay temporarily with family or friends because they have no where else to go..... how the f#@k are they homeless??

eviltwin

I work with homeless people, most of them are there because of domestic violence, sheer bad luck to lose a job or addiction leading to family breakdown. I was homeless for two months when I was younger due to family breakdown, it can happen to anyone.

katiek102010

I know 3 who were/are technically fit the description.

1) house was repossessed 10 years ago approx. The father lost his job and banks ppi refused to pay out as mother was working but wages not sufficient to pay mortgage and feed family, and also former manager was not able to be located to sign paperwork as to why employees were let go and business folded. Dodgy company by all accounts and took months before he was able to claim. Bank sent people around to house to discuss their finances!!! These financial people basically told them to vacate the property within a week. No court appearance anything. Terrified the lives out of them. To this day they are still renting. They were very innocent and I have seen all paperwork etc, they were only around 3 months in arrears with mortgage. They were paying weekly payments just not the full monthly amount. Couldn't afford a solicitor and were waiting for citizens advice to see them.

2) a young couple kicked out by a dodgy landlord. They ended up with family.

3) a guy who has split up with his wife. She kicked him out as she met someone else. Currently trying to get him to go see a solicitor to get house sorted but he's in bits. Can't afford to rent anywhere as he's still paying mortgage on family home

sportsfan90

katiek102010 wrote: »

3) a guy who has split up with his wife. She kicked him out as she met someone else. Currently trying to get him to go see a solicitor to get house sorted but he's in bits. Can't afford to rent anywhere as he's still paying mortgage on family home

Poor guy

There are many types of homeless people, but the separated father who still pays a mortgage on a property he doesn't get to live in seems to get little to no attention.

Obviously I don't know all the details in his case, but in general someone in his position should absolutely refuse to leave the family home. Hopefully things will get easier for him.

Raconteuse

Yes. Severe mental health issues - suicide attempts, self harm, and swimming in drugs and alcohol. Also extremely volatile and aggressive. A scary person at times. Frankly quite a horrible person. This was him only in his late teens/early 20s. He always ignored attempts to help him, and plenty of people cared. Now in his 30s he's sleeping rough and an alcoholic. Don't know about his father but his mother and sister are lovely. He grew up in a rough area but had a loving family who did their best.

Nobody rational wants anyone to end up in that situation of course. But sometimes it's not the fault of the government or "society" and down to choices and behaviour.

katiek102010

sportsfan90 wrote: »

Poor guy

There are many types of homeless people, but the separated father who still pays a mortgage on a property he doesn't get to live in seems to get little to no attention.

Obviously I don't know all the details in his case, but in general someone in his position should absolutely refuse to leave the family home. Hopefully things will get easier for him.

I feel sorry for him. By all accounts he has done nothing wrong. Every penny is in the house, inheritance from parents etc. He needs to get a solicitor but he's not there yet. Sofa surfing with mates etc

anewme

Raconteuse wrote: »

Yes. Severe mental health issues - suicide attempts, self harm, and swimming in drugs and alcohol. Also extremely volatile and aggressive. A scary person at times. Frankly quite a horrible person. This was him only in his late teens/early 20s. He always ignored attempts to help him, and plenty of people cared. Now in his 30s he's sleeping rough and an alcoholic. Don't know about his father but his mother and sister are lovely. He grew up in a rough area but had a loving family who did their best.

Nobody rational wants anyone to end up in that situation of course. But sometimes it's not the fault of the government or "society" and down to choices and behaviour.

Knew someone who went down that road (without being a horrible person) Lovely young man with mental health and alcohol issues. Family tried to reach but couldn't. Hard to see him (and his little dog) going down a slippery slope sleeping out on the canal and in dangerous situations.

Eventually an elderly Aunt (of all people) roped him in to be her
" carer" (but in fairness she was his) and hes got a job again and looks healthy and happy. I see him walking his little dog. Gorgeous looking guy, well dressed, you'd never guess now he'd been a rough sleeper.

debok

Ronin247 wrote: »

From citizens information

" In general, you may be considered homeless if you are:

Sleeping rough
Staying in an emergency hostel or refuge
Staying in bed and breakfast or hotel accommodation on a temporary basis
Staying temporarily with friends or family because you have nowhere else to go
Squatting (occupying a building illegally"

I have been in some of the situations above in my time.

I have never once considered myself homeless.

Thousands of people stay temporarily with family or friends because they have no where else to go..... how the f#@k are they homeless??

Because if the goodness of others was taking away, they would be homeless.

mr_fegelien

A more focued question, does anyone know someone who is homeless (in a hostel or sleeping rough) due to being kicked out by family?

corner of hells

anewme wrote: »

Knew someone who went down that road (without being a horrible person) Lovely young man with mental health and alcohol issues. Family tried to reach but couldn't. Hard to see him (and his little dog) going down a slippery slope sleeping out on the canal and in dangerous situations.

Eventually an elderly Aunt (of all people) roped him in to be her
" carer" (but in fairness she was his) and hes got a job again and looks healthy and happy. I see him walking his little dog. Gorgeous looking guy, well dressed, you'd never guess now he'd been a rough sleeper.

A friend of mine was persuaded by his wife to build a Granny Flat out the back of his house for his brother in law.
The lad became homeless when his mother died ,was rough sleeping and drinking heavily.
The only condition to stay in the granny flat was he must look after the family dog.

Hes stopped drinking now and works part-time .

My friends complaint is that the dog is looked after better than he is.

Aside from that , I also work in homeless services and would be familiar with a lot of homeless in Dublin.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

mr_fegelien wrote: »

A more focued question, does anyone know someone who is homeless (in a hostel or sleeping rough) due to being kicked out by family?

Yes.

mr_fegelien

corner of hells wrote: »

A friend of mine was persuaded by his wife to build a Granny Flat out the back of his house for his brother in law.
The lad became homeless when his mother died ,was rough sleeping and drinking heavily.
The only condition to stay in the granny flat was he must look after the family dog.

Hes stopped drinking now and works part-time .

My friends complaint is that the dog is looked after better than he is.

Aside from that , I also work in homeless services and would be familiar with a lot of homeless in Dublin.

Do they face violence as rough sleepers?

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

mr_fegelien wrote: »

Do they face violence as rough sleepers?

You seem to either have a fascination with homelessness, are close to being homeless or see yourself as being homeless at some point. So, why not contact Focus Ireland and discuss it with them? They are the experts and know the score better than After Hours.

cj maxx

Myself, almost. Its very easy .

Fr_Dougal

mr_fegelien wrote: »

A more focued question, does anyone know someone who is homeless (in a hostel or sleeping rough) due to being kicked out by family?

If you stop acting the bollix your parents won’t kick you out, but you already know this.

Raconteuse

Jeez Mr f gets a hell of a hard time here yet keeps coming back for more I kinda think fair play. I know he posts some awful stuff and is clearly just out to seek attention at times (he even said as much) but his questions aren't always that bad, and he's young and curious. He retains his humour to the last.

Definitely a few far worse folk here.

Your Face

I knew one fella, I got to know him fairly well. He was sleeping rough in Galway. He had his head screwed on - no drink or drugs and was working a few hours a week.
He just was going through bad patch and wasn't going to ask anyone for help. He got a job in Dublin and I never seen him around again.

ILoveYourVibes

No I don't.

One eyed Jack

Ava Sticky Robe wrote: »

Why? What does it matter to you? Have you no study to do, or friends to talk to, or music to listen to, or something positive to ponder?
Ever think of volunteering with a charity to help and meet homeless people?

There's a strange voyeurism at play and it needs reigning in.

This, in a nutshell.

mr_fegelien wrote: »

The reason I ask is because I want to know whether it's abnormal to get kicked out at 21 with no job or formal education and if so, how do people generally fare once kicked out.

Everyone’s experiences are different. Yes it’s abnormal to get kicked out of your home at 21. It would be unusual that you’re still there at 21 anyway but given you have no formal education there are reasons we’re not privy to which would explain that unusual circumstance. People who are kicked out of home with no formal education don’t tend to fare very well. Anyone who does would be extremely unusual, but with An Post now giving homeless people access to the Internet you’ll still be able to post a plethora of questions here at least.

On a more serious note - yes, I was homeless at one time in my life and as one would expect, it was shìte, and looking back now I was incredibly naive at the time and didn’t help myself because I knew nothing about being homeless or the multitude of services that were available that could have prevented me from becoming homeless, because 20 years ago I didn’t have the Internet at my fingertips where a quick google search would have provided me with all the information I needed about services available to people at risk of becoming homeless.

zerosugarbuzz

sportsfan90 wrote: »

I've recently moved back in with my parents for a few months.

Many would have you believe that I should be considered homeless.

Depending on your age, it actually is! Adults should be able to provide a home for themselves independent of their parents. Our current insane housing situation renders it possible for very many of us to become homeless given a change in our circumstances.

Loveinapril

I work with young people in care. Some of them ended up that way because they were 'kicked out' by their parents at 16/ 17.

Wanderer78

Yea I've met one or two that lived on the streets for a while, it causes a lifetime of irreversible psychological damage

One eyed Jack

Wanderer78 wrote: »

Yea I've met one or two that lived on the streets for a while, it causes a lifetime of irreversible psychological damage

One can only hope that in this particular case the children are receiving the support they need now more than ever -

Children spent night alone with mother's body in homeless accommodation

Wanderer78

One eyed Jack wrote:

One can only hope that in this particular case the children are receiving the support they need now more than ever -

That's disturbing

missyb01

My late brother was homeless for many years, heroin addiction is what ultimately lead to his homelessness. Myself and my mam would go looking for him but never seen him. Every 6 months or so, the Gardai would call to the house to let my mam know he was still alive. I remember dreading the Garda car pulling up always fearing that this was the knock to say he was dead.

I doing shift work and my dad would collect me from the bus stop late at night. One night he told me there was a surprise at home!!! Out of the blue my brother had come home; completely unrecognisable. I remember just hugging him, I had no words. Sadly, he passed away from cancer a few years later at 31.

Bishop of hope

I had a couple of lads working with me a few years ago in London who unknown to me were sleeping rough.
One lad was from Cork, the other was a Londoner.
I found out they were sleeping rough and offered to help them get somewhere to live, they refused and both gave in their notice shortly afterwards.
I never found out why they slept rough as they just brushed it off if you asked them. I never seen them again afterwards

Accepting Cookies

My parents were crap parents- I have been homeless throughout my childhood, living in a tent, a car, crappy hotel rooms, a battered women's shelter, and many random people's homes who took us in. My childhood experiences lit a fire under me, in addition to strong flame to succeed and live well that I suppose I always had anyway. My brother on the other hand, has never recovered. I held down jobs to support myself since I was 16 and put myself through university, always in stable housing since I was ultimately abandoned fully by the age of 16 by both parents. My brother made many bad choices and was often in a bad way, dropped out of school, got into fights, drank too much and did drugs and made other various bad decisions. I have always chosen loving, personal relationships, chosen to save my money, made safe and responsible choices, chosen to travel and see the world, etc none of which he has ever been able to do. I have often wondered what is the difference in us. Someone once put it to me in a way that made the best sense: the same water that softens the potato hardens the egg. I had a horrible start in life but I stayed optimistic and full of passion for life somehow, always very driven. My brother to this day has the hugest chip on shoulder, feels like all of his problems are someone else's fault, and is always looking for a handout. Our trauma may not have been our fault, but it's our responsibility to heal from it..
It took me many years to learn to step back from him, because ultimately I only enabled him which didn't help him in the end. I have given him so many fresh starts, handups, a very soft place to land to get on his feet, and he's spat on it and wasted each and every opportunity. I finally put a firm end to it once he became violent and angry in my home and around my family so I had to put my family first and I made him leave. One of the hardest things I had to do was tell him no he couldn't stay with me when his relationship with a new woman broke down (they also had a child) and it was freezing out...I didn't sleep at all that night not knowing where he ended up. The next day he told me he slept in his car and to please let me back in but as a mother I had to remember my priority and said no. He ended up at a shelter then stayed with friends. Before that happened, I had paid a deposit for him on his own apt, furnished it with some older furniture of mine and bought the rest he needed cheaply, bought food etc - I wouldn't have done that but it was for my niece that I did. Of course he **** the bed and eventually stopped paying rent, the house had damage from him and he gave the landlord my details to pay up to the tune of THOUSANDS. This was right before Christmas last year. I haven't spoken to him since. I believe he lives in a sober house now, but I'm not sure. He's also been in and out of jail, but doesn't seem to have hit his own personal rock bottom or had an epiphany. I've learned you can help others as much as you want and can, but ultimately they HAVE to help themselves too.

OP- if you've been kicked out by your parents at 21, my take on that is you've probably taken massive advantage of them and/or worse. Once you start sliding it's difficult to recover. Anything anyone does for you now, including your family, is generous once you're 18. If you're unappreciative of the help you've been given or abusive or disrespectful to those who support you, you need to cop on. You have one life, don't waste it.

Bigbagofcans

katiek102010 wrote: »

3) a guy who has split up with his wife. She kicked him out as she met someone else. Currently trying to get him to go see a solicitor to get house sorted but he's in bits. Can't afford to rent anywhere as he's still paying mortgage on family home

Do they have children? So unfair on him getting kicked out and still having to pay mortgage.

Hector Savage

I know a lad whose Dad's policy was to kick the kids out at 18, there was about 15 kids in the family - they all did fairly well, survivors !

farmchoice

back in the mid nineties i worked in a big dublin bar/nightclub, one of the lads who started around the same time as me was a strange sort of guy, he was a bit older than the rest of us (looking back now he might have been 25/27) we were all either students, drop outs, Spanish kids on gap years and then at management level the type of lost souls who end up in long term bar work.
this guy seemed sound enough at first but as time went on it became apparent his back story was not adding up. at fist i thought he was just another bull****ter but then i realized that in fact the reason he was always out on the piss after work (middle of the night) looking for house parties was he had no where to go, on nights when he could find nowhere to lay his head he would get a taxi to the airport and sleep there.

i think sometimes he would organize himself to get a b&b. he was a top class barman so people put up with him longer than might be expected.
one Saturday night we were working away but it was one of the occasional nights when we as a staff decided to get collectively rat arsed as we worked, at least half the bar staff and all the floor staff absolutely pissed, glass collectors lying under tables barmen puking in bins, waitresses fighting in the kitchen the whole nine yards, mid nineties mayhem, anyway half way through the night our man just got his coat and staggered out, never saw him again.

Foweva Awone

I ended up homeless through addiction. After coming into recovery I spent some time in an absolutely awful SVDP transition house (you'd be treated with more respect and dignity living in a regular homeless hostel tbh), before renting my own apartment through Homeless HAP. I was lucky that I had previous landlord references to give the landlord, and that I had previous and current employment references, it's a lot more difficult to get a landlord to accept you without those.

riclad

Some Landlords end a tenancy,they might decide to sell the house,
so tenants have to look for a new place to live,
in area,s like dublin there is not enough rental units especially for people on lower income,s ,
so it can be hard to find a new place .
Most council house,s have been sold off ,
even people working full time can find it hard to find a place to live.
we are in the worst housing crisis i can remember .
Most of the new rental units being built are aimed at students or high earning tenants .