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How to make money off brexit.

  • 09-08-2019 11:58pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,102 ✭✭✭


    Seeing as next door have lost their minds, how can we use this opportunity to make a few bucks off their little moment of drug experimentation.

    They're usually quite buttoned down, but right now are tripping balls.

    I think they'll eventually sober up, put their pants back on, clean up the cans, and promise themselves to never buy any more tabs from Nigel and his mates again.

    How can we as good neighbors best use this brief moment of them rolling around in their back garden talking to the plants and doing poppers to get some money out of them.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24 bumders


    Suck farts out of cows arses to save the ozone layer is about it


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    I’m currently saving to buy a house. At the moment, I’ve saved 4 peppers and a bottle of Peroni. Come November, that should buy me a house in Chelsea.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,896 ✭✭✭sabat


    Jaysus it's brummytom, welcome back young man.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 433 ✭✭Dia_Anseo


    Do we want the 6 counties back?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Muahahaha


    Well if sterling tanks by the predicted 8-10% then theres gonna be some rush across the border for booze this Xmas


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,983 ✭✭✭✭tuxy


    Dia_Anseo wrote: »
    Do we want the 6 counties back?

    No as the border will be the main source of income for anyone who want to become a smuggler. It will be the easiest way for someone with little starting capital to make money.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,102 ✭✭✭greencap


    tuxy wrote: »
    No as the border will be the main source of income for anyone who want to become a smuggler. It will be the easiest way for someone with little starting capital to make money.

    (Homer to brain) Explain how (/homer to brain)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,373 ✭✭✭tonycascarino


    I don't know how we will fair out ourselves. Who is going to replace Britain in the EU as one of the largest net contributors going forward? ....Personally, I think we will all suffer a recession of sorts in Europe after October.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 433 ✭✭Dia_Anseo


    BREXIT won't happen.......you heard it here 1st folks!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,211 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    Attract firms here. We are the English speaking gateway to the EU.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 85,523 ✭✭✭✭Atlantic Dawn
    GDY151


    Muahahaha wrote: »
    Well if sterling tanks by the predicted 8-10% then theres gonna be some rush across the border for booze this Xmas


    With a hard Brexit there will be a border and booze will be seized when you drive back down here.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,661 ✭✭✭✭kneemos


    Short selling. All the instigators of Brexit have made a killing.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,983 ✭✭✭✭tuxy


    With a hard Brexit there will be a border and booze will be seized when you drive back down here.

    How many road crossing are there?
    Just use a less obvious one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,275 ✭✭✭Your Face


    I've already begun to manufacture tinfoil hats.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,313 ✭✭✭Ubbquittious


    Build a coal powerstation south of the border and pump the emissions through a tunnel under the border and up. No EU fines for resulting emissions


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 32,688 ✭✭✭✭ytpe2r5bxkn0c1


    With a hard Brexit there will be a border and booze will be seized when you drive back down here.

    :D You obviously don't remember the last border checks and controls. There are umpteen ways around any border post location. People did it for decades.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,983 ✭✭✭✭tuxy


    Your Face wrote: »
    I've already begun to manufacture tinfoil hats.

    Do they it have the CE marking that shows that it conforms to EU health and safety ratings?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,983 ✭✭✭✭tuxy


    :D You obviously don't remember the last border checks and controls. There are umpteen ways around any border post location. People did it for decades.

    Are you saying they wont be able to do checks on all 300+ border crossings? :eek:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 32,688 ✭✭✭✭ytpe2r5bxkn0c1


    tuxy wrote: »
    Are you saying they wont be able to do checks on all 300+ border crossings? :eek:

    Yes, shocking isn't it? Even with all this technology Boris says is available.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 85,523 ✭✭✭✭Atlantic Dawn
    GDY151


    They might try to weigh the cars going north and then re-weigh them coming back, you could use bags of water going up and unload them in Sainsburys car park to come back with a load of alcohol exactly the same :D


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,275 ✭✭✭Your Face


    tuxy wrote: »
    Do they it have the CE marking that shows that it conforms to EU health and safety ratings?


    Ive asked the factory in China to include it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 43,037 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    Yugoslavia


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,211 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    Yugoslavia
    ALWAYS!

    Its where we will have fake Irish passports made to sell to the Brits at a price!:pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 882 ✭✭✭ygolometsipe


    Start a news paper called "Brittan first" and pander to your readers.
    topics should include:

    * nasty EU
    * British tea is the best tea (even though its imported from Indonesia)
    * weekly selective immigrant profiling and victim blaming.
    * tits
    * pseudo science and UFO articles.

    * EU is the reason the world is round and dark at night.
    * Over the top pride in soldiers and the governments military pursuits.
    * regional editions where you can take party sides in elections.
    * stalk celebrities and promote gossip click bate type headlines.
    * SHOUT AT YOUR READERS IN LARGE CAPS ALL THE TIME.
    * never hire journalists that have talent.



    sell paper -> profit.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,211 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    Start a news paper called "Brittan first" and pander to your readers.
    topics should include:

    * nasty EU
    * British tea is the best tea (even though its imported from Indonesia)
    * weekly selective immigrant profiling and victim blaming.
    * tits
    * pseudo science and UFO articles.

    * EU is the reason the world is round and dark at night.
    * Over the top pride in soldiers and the governments military pursuits.
    * regional editions where you can take party sides in elections.
    * stalk celebrities and promote gossip click bate type headlines.
    * SHOUT AT YOUR READERS IN LARGE CAPS ALL THE TIME.
    * never hire journalists that have talent.



    sell paper -> profit.
    BY GEORGE I THINK YOU'VE GOT IT!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,983 ✭✭✭✭tuxy


    ALWAYS!

    Its where we will have fake Irish passports made to sell to the Brits at a price!:pac:

    It's Israel that has the demand for fake Irish passports!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,330 ✭✭✭✭RobbingBandit


    Print 10,000 We Have You Borris t-shirts then we wait


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 94,288 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Start a news paper called "Brittan first" and pander to your readers.
    topics should include:

    * nasty EU
    * British tea is the best tea (even though its imported from Indonesia)

    Imported ?

    Oi mate u 'avin a f**kin' laff

    https://tregothnan.co.uk/product/great-british-tea-10-sachet-box/



    It's a "blend" of "Cornish tea" with the "finest Assam"
    No prizes for guessing the ratios, at the price it could easily be the finest Assam.


    So you can sell anything foreign with a huge markup as long as you slap on a Union Jack and just enough "English" to keep the Advertising Standards Authority off your back. Or not.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 94,288 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    I don't know how we will fair out ourselves. Who is going to replace Britain in the EU as one of the largest net contributors going forward? ....Personally, I think we will all suffer a recession of sorts in Europe after October.
    Look at all the billion Euro fines the EU has been handing out over the last few years to US multinationals.

    We've €13Bn of Apples money resting in an account.

    GDPR is serious stuff. Up to 2% of global turnover or up to €20 million. And you can get hit multiple times.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,496 ✭✭✭RoryMac


    They might try to weigh the cars going north and then re-weigh them coming back, you could use bags of water going up and unload them in Sainsburys car park to come back with a load of alcohol exactly the same :D

    You could sell the water up north when they start running out and double the profits


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,438 ✭✭✭✭Collie D


    Ah, we should really be looking to help out our neighbour in times of need.

    Offer to act as pawnbroker for whatever valuables they have. What could we take at a good price from them?

    I suggest the World Cup they keep going on about for a start. That would look lovely on my mantelpiece.

    The Crown Jewels maybe? Ours went missing a hundred years ago. About time we replaced them.

    Tower Bridge over the Liffey, anyone?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,417 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    Shop up north as the pound collapses is the obvious one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,983 ✭✭✭✭tuxy


    ToddyDoody wrote: »
    Shop up north as the pound collapses is the obvious one.

    That would be saving money not making money.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 232 ✭✭jcorr


    Probably short the Cable.

    That's what George Soros did haha.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,417 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    tuxy wrote: »
    That would be saving money not making money.

    The last time I checked, money was money whether it was made or saved.


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