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Diet for preventing a spotty hole

  • 09-06-2019 8:46pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭


    What works best for keeping spots off the bum bum ? I assume a low grease diet is a must so no KFC and the like?


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,646 ✭✭✭_blaaz


    I imagine regular hygiene to more important tbh


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,881 ✭✭✭Peatys


    Try bathing in sudocream.

    Or just bathing.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,901 ✭✭✭matchthis


    Yep, I did read that right


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    _blaaz wrote: »
    I imagine regular hygiene to more important tbh

    Well that depends. Over washing any skin will remove essential oils and nutrients and do worse damage in the long run.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,646 ✭✭✭_blaaz


    Well that depends. Over washing any skin will remove essential oils and nutrients and do worse damage in the long run.

    It wont....unless your showering for 2 to 3 hours a day


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,145 ✭✭✭✭Gael23


    What works best for keeping spots off the bum bum ? I assume a low grease diet is a must so no KFC and the like?

    Are you talking about grapes? Plenty of roughage to make sure those brown trouts slide along nicely


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    _blaaz wrote: »
    It wont....unless your showering for 2 to 3 hours a day

    Once a week is sufficient.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,325 ✭✭✭Tilikum17


    Peatys wrote: »
    Try bathing in sudocream.

    Or just bathing.

    Sudocrem even.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,007 ✭✭✭s7ryf3925pivug


    wet wipes and vaseline. eat lots of both.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    Gael23 wrote: »
    Are you talking about grapes? Plenty of roughage to make sure those brown trouts slide along nicely

    No not the piles. More like anal acne.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,523 ✭✭✭Sonny noggs


    You need Teepee for your bunghole.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,089 ✭✭✭Happy4all


    post a picture


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,020 ✭✭✭gifted


    Happy4all wrote: »
    post a picture

    Oh good god don't....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 946 ✭✭✭Phileas Frog


    Happy4all wrote: »
    post a picture

    Or a video. Careful you don't accidentally send it to all your WhatsApp contacts...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,533 ✭✭✭Car99


    Not sitting on your arse all day should help


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,145 ✭✭✭✭Gael23


    No not the piles. More like anal acne.

    Good personal hygiene. Get one of those green scrubbers every so often to make it nice and clean


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,254 ✭✭✭✭Tom Mann Centuria


    Car99 wrote: »
    Not sitting on your arse all day should help

    Or not plucking these stupid threads out of it might help them too.

    Oh well, give me an easy life and a peaceful death.



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 772 ✭✭✭FFred


    Enough of the shiit threads already !


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,054 ✭✭✭✭Danzy


    The first step has to be buying more underwear, move away from the monthly system.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 252 ✭✭Max Moment


    Brillo pad and salt will sort


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    Gael23 wrote: »
    Good personal hygiene. Get one of those green scrubbers every so often to make it nice and clean

    I believe aggressive squeezing as soon as one of those fcukers dare to show his spotty crown. Do you know if there are medical vice grip clamps available for the job?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,646 ✭✭✭_blaaz


    I believe aggressive squeezing a soon as one of those fcukers dare to show his spotty crown. Do you know if there are medical vice grip clamps available for the job?

    Actually funnily enough there is a tool for this job....guess you dont have sisters anyway


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,145 ✭✭✭✭Gael23


    Max Moment wrote: »
    Brillo pad and salt will sort

    A liberal squirt of Cif on the Brillo pad will have his hole smelling of lemons.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    _blaaz wrote: »
    Actually funnily enough there is a tool for this job....guess you dont have sisters anyway

    What’s it called?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,054 ✭✭✭✭Danzy


    What’s it called?

    "The Tikki Wang Wang Posterior Pimple Popper 2000".

    Available in all poor outlets.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    Danzy wrote: »
    "The Tikki Wang Wang Posterior Pimple Popper 2000".

    Available in all poor outlets.

    Stop. Anyway what about diet suggestions.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,743 ✭✭✭Wanderer2010


    Always on a Sunday night...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,684 ✭✭✭✭EmmetSpiceland


    Could you get two “Biore Pore Strips” and fashion them into a circle that could be stuck onto the anus?

    Or is there a “Clearasil Bum Wash” on the market?

    “It is not blood that makes you Irish but a willingness to be part of the Irish nation” - Thomas Davis



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,022 ✭✭✭xabi


    Wire brush and Dettol


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,211 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    Spotted dick!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 26,658 ✭✭✭✭OldMrBrennan83


    What works best for keeping spots off the bum bum ? I assume a low grease diet is a must so no KFC and the like?

    I wipe after I ****e.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,822 ✭✭✭liam7831


    Did you put the spotty hole video on WhatsApp ?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,330 ✭✭✭deise08


    Exfoliate, exfoliate, exfoliate,

    Failing that, apparently male juice is good for pimples ðŸ˜


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,646 ✭✭✭_blaaz


    deise08 wrote: »
    Failing that, apparently male juice is good for pimples ðŸ˜


    Well this took a wild turn :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 43,037 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    Fight fire with fire

    Give it the Hiroshima treatment

    A vindaloo


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,211 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    deise08 wrote: »
    Exfoliate, exfoliate, exfoliate,

    Failing that, apparently male juice is good for pimples ðŸ˜


    Stop milking it!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 632 ✭✭✭Sorry about that


    Prevent or cure a spotty botty op?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    liam7831 wrote: »
    Did you put the spotty hole video on WhatsApp ?

    No one saw it. Lucky escape


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,211 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    No one saw it. Lucky escape

    god smiled


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24 Supcycle


    A ferocious slapping


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 332 ✭✭Tikki Wang Wang


    My usual diet while large (cos I work hard on the farm) is healthy enough I believe anyway

    usual day would be as follows.

    Breakfast.
    2 rashers
    2 sausages
    2 eggs
    1 piece black pudding
    1 piece white pudding
    1 piece of liver
    2 fried tomatoes
    2 slices fried bread
    2 slices toast
    1 pot of tea plus milk and sugar


    Lunch
    100% irish beef quarter pound burger with cheese
    Roast spuds
    Beans

    Dinner
    1/2 roast chicken
    Roast spuds
    Roast veg - mixed
    Stuffing and gravy

    Supper
    3 scrambled eggs with cheese and beans
    1 small steak
    3 slices toast

    Snacks
    2 bags tayto cheese and onion
    2 bananas
    2 apples

    Alcohol
    Few jars of guinness (7) every night


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,533 ✭✭✭Car99


    You need to cut out the sugar in your tea, white sugar is deadly


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 73 ✭✭Sac O Spuds


    My usual diet while large (cos I work hard on the farm) is healthy enough I believe anyway

    usual day would be as follows.

    Breakfast.
    2 rashers
    2 sausages
    2 eggs
    1 piece black pudding
    1 piece white pudding
    1 piece of liver
    2 fried tomatoes
    2 slices fried bread
    2 slices toast
    1 pot of tea plus milk and sugar


    Lunch
    100% irish beef quarter pound burger with cheese
    Roast spuds
    Beans

    Dinner
    1/2 roast chicken
    Roast spuds
    Roast veg - mixed
    Stuffing and gravy

    Supper
    3 scrambled eggs with cheese and beans
    1 small steak
    3 slices toast

    Snacks
    2 bags tayto cheese and onion
    2 bananas
    2 apples

    Alcohol
    Few jars of guinness (7) every night

    Mother a jaysus what are you some breed of elephant? I'd say you'd walk away from a fair stack. Anyway why are ya bothered by a spotty hole? Who the fook is goin to be gawking at it?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,145 ✭✭✭✭Gael23


    That diet is awful and produces quite a lot of runny waste matter. Modify your diet so you fave better formed s****s


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,952 ✭✭✭✭Stoner


    2 bananas 2 apples

    You are short one bit of fruit or veg anyway, world smooth bum organisation recommends 5 a day.

    Do you grow anything on the farm? are the eggs from your own hens?

    Or the rashers, your own pigs?

    Have you checked out all the animal's bums on the farm.

    Remember it's you are what they eat now rather than you are what you eat.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 82 ✭✭Dexter2019


    Mother a jaysus what are you some breed of elephant??

    Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,024 ✭✭✭✭Baggly


    Mod

    Thread closed for review.


This discussion has been closed.
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