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Cranky breast feeding woman in cafe

  • 20-12-2018 12:03pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,155 ✭✭✭


    Having coffee earlier in a cafe, a woman sitting near the entrance with her tit hanging out breast feeding her baby, whatever it does not bother me. However what did bother me was that everyone who walked into the cafe were scolded by her due to no fault of their own... Forced to see her with her tit hanging out because she was right in front of the door... That's no ones fault, she directed a "What ya looking at"? at every man woman that walked in.

    Maybe she could sit not at the entrance then if she has a problem being the first thing people see walking in the door. Big mouth on her, accusing everyone just going in for a cup of coffee of being a weirdo or something. Are a dozen people wrong to catch a glimpse of something a blind man would see or is she the one in the wrong? I think she is wrong and should have been more considerate to herself and her infant and sat further back where there were plenty of vacant tables, after all breast feeding a baby is a private affair, right?


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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    I've no issue with it, my own kids were breastfed - by their mother mind, not me:D

    But it's as simple as this - if you don't want people seeing your tits, don't take them out in public. If you do take them out in public, you cede your right for them to not be seen.

    It's not fúcking rocket science is it!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 43,037 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    Why is it a private affair?

    It's the most natural thing in the world


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    The mothers bizarre attitude aside, breastfeeding is not something that needs to be done privately.
    Unless you are of the opinion that bottle fed babies should also be fed privately?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    Why is a private affair?

    It's the most natural thing in the world

    So is urinating.

    It's about having a bit of decorum in public. We're not wild animals.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 664 ✭✭✭starbaby2003


    Having coffee earlier in a cafe, a woman sitting near the entrance with her tit hanging out breast feeding her baby, whatever it does not bother me. However what did bother me was that everyone who walked into the cafe were scolded by her due to no fault of their own... Forced to see her with her tit hanging out because she was right in front of the door... That's no ones fault, she directed a "What ya looking at"? at every man woman that walked in.

    Maybe she could sit not at the entrance then if she has a problem being the first thing people see walking in the door. Big mouth on her, accusing everyone just going in for a cup of coffee of being a weirdo or something. Are a dozen people wrong to catch a glimpse of something a blind man would see or is she the one in the wrong? I think she is wrong and should have been more considerate to herself and her infant and sat further back where there were plenty of vacant tables, after all breast feeding a baby is a private affair, right?

    Are you for ****ing real. This story is 100% bull****. She can sit wherever she wants. You sound like an asshole that deserves to be shouted at.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,365 ✭✭✭✭McMurphy


    Bitty.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,034 ✭✭✭Sonics2k


    So is urinating.

    It's about having a bit of decorum in public. We're not wild animals.

    You can't really compare taking a piss with feeding a newborn child.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 664 ✭✭✭starbaby2003


    So is urinating.

    It's about having a bit of decorum in public. We're not wild animals.

    What’s your take on breathing ?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,816 ✭✭✭✭everlast75


    Whenever I see a woman breastfeeding in public, I find that I can ease the tension, by just winking at her

    Elect a clown... Expect a circus



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,035 ✭✭✭optogirl


    Having coffee earlier in a cafe, a woman sitting near the entrance with her tit hanging out breast feeding her baby, right?

    :rolleyes:


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  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 15,822 Mod ✭✭✭✭Tabnabs


    What’s your take on breathing ?

    Or farting...?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 43,037 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    So is urinating.

    It's about having a bit of decorum in public. We're not wild animals.

    So you are saying that a mother feeding her baby in a cafe is the same as having a slash on the floor?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    So is urinating.

    It's about having a bit of decorum in public. We're not wild animals.

    Are you capable of feeding a child from your nether regions?
    Do women urinate from their breasts?
    Completely different.

    The primary function of breasts is to feed babies. Society has sexualised them so much that people forget that.
    Maybe stop sexualising the situation and you won't find yourself so offended by it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,222 ✭✭✭✭iamwhoiam


    Are you for ****ing real. This story is 100% bull****. She can sit wherever she wants. You sound like an asshole that deserves to be shouted at.

    Of course she can , but why is she glaring at everyone who happens to pass by then? I am entitled to sit with my cup of coffee without being accused of something I didnt do when I am in a cafe


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,992 ✭✭✭✭fits


    I have to say. I breastfed twins and I never had any issues feeding them in public. ( one at a time ) Only one comment I can think of. I’m not sure how you could see her boob if she was actually feeding though.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,190 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    Sounds to me like the cafe was busy and she had no other choice but to sit there (believe me, no breastfeeding woman chooses to be the centre of attention or to sit in a high-traffic area).

    Already feeling vulnerable and irritated, it sounds to me like she was a bit over-vigilant against the gawkers who do a double-take when they see a woman breastfeeding.

    Maybe you could have a little bit of understanding. Did you at any stage offer your seat to her?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,876 ✭✭✭Feisar


    seamus wrote: »
    Sounds to me like the cafe was busy and she had no other choice but to sit there (believe me, no breastfeeding woman chooses to be the centre of attention or to sit in a high-traffic area).

    Already feeling vulnerable and irritated, it sounds to me like she was a bit over-vigilant against the gawkers who do a double-take when they see a woman breastfeeding.

    Maybe you could have a little bit of understanding. Did you at any stage offer your seat to her?

    That's her problem though, not the OP's

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    everlast75 wrote: »
    Whenever I see a woman breastfeeding in public, I find that I can ease the tension, by just winking at her


    You pervy old cretin:mad::mad::mad::mad:


    Also, you spelled **** wrong. Tut tut tut.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 381 ✭✭homosapien91


    People like you are the reason women feel so paranoid about breastfeeding in public, that story is complete crap.


  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 23,254 ✭✭✭✭beertons


    She could have refilled the jugs with her other jug.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,190 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    Feisar wrote: »
    That's her problem though, not the OP's
    Sure. She never made it his problem though.

    So why does he care?

    Like I say, if it annoyed him so much, he could have had a bit of empathy and tried to help.

    No no, maybe a rant on the Internet is more appropriate.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 554 ✭✭✭Fiftyfilthy


    seamus wrote: »
    Sounds to me like the cafe was busy and she had no other choice but to sit there (believe me, no breastfeeding woman chooses to be the centre of attention or to sit in a high-traffic area).

    Already feeling vulnerable and irritated, it sounds to me like she was a bit over-vigilant against the gawkers who do a double-take when they see a woman breastfeeding.

    Maybe you could have a little bit of understanding. Did you at any stage offer your seat to her?

    He just said he entered the shop and she was mouthing off and glaring at the people entering .

    Here, take me seat ......

    Doesn’t really make sense does it?

    She sounds like an attention seeker. If she wants to feed her baby in public , fine.

    If she doesn’t want people staring , do it in an area less discreet or just get on with it and feed your baby


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    Feisar wrote: »
    That's her problem though, not the OP's

    The older generation would feed discreetly if in public, ie a light shawl carefully draped.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,603 ✭✭✭thecomedian


    People like you are the reason women feel so paranoid about breastfeeding in public, that story is complete crap.


    How do you know?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    Graces7 wrote: »
    The older generation would feed discreetly if in public, ie a light shawl carefully draped.

    This is how 99.9% of modern women also feed their babies.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,019 ✭✭✭ct5amr2ig1nfhp


    Why does it bother you? Were you not breast fed when you were a baby. Do you want to talk about it?
    Having coffee earlier in a cafe, a woman sitting near the entrance with her tit hanging out breast feeding her baby, whatever it does not bother me. However what did bother me was that everyone who walked into the cafe were scolded by her due to no fault of their own... Forced to see her with her tit hanging out because she was right in front of the door... That's no ones fault, she directed a "What ya looking at"? at every man woman that walked in.

    Maybe she could sit not at the entrance then if she has a problem being the first thing people see walking in the door. Big mouth on her, accusing everyone just going in for a cup of coffee of being a weirdo or something. Are a dozen people wrong to catch a glimpse of something a blind man would see or is she the one in the wrong? I think she is wrong and should have been more considerate to herself and her infant and sat further back where there were plenty of vacant tables, after all breast feeding a baby is a private affair, right?

    Because they have done multiple studies on that very topic. 30-40% of women are too embarrassed to breast feed in public.
    How do you know?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,894 ✭✭✭Triceratops Ballet


    Graces7 wrote: »
    The older generation would feed discreetly if in public, ie a light shawl carefully draped.

    I've seen very few breast feeding mothers who could be described as being indiscreet. Most of the time you wouldn't notice at first glance, it's only if you spend some time gawking you notice


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,876 ✭✭✭Feisar


    Graces7 wrote: »
    The older generation would feed discreetly if in public, ie a light shawl carefully draped.

    Not arguing with you or anything however how does that fit in with what I was replying to?

    Yes the older generation would have been more discreet.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,684 ✭✭✭✭lawred2


    Having coffee earlier in a cafe, a woman sitting near the entrance with her tit hanging out breast feeding her baby, whatever it does not bother me. However what did bother me was that everyone who walked into the cafe were scolded by her due to no fault of their own... Forced to see her with her tit hanging out because she was right in front of the door... That's no ones fault, she directed a "What ya looking at"? at every man woman that walked in.

    Maybe she could sit not at the entrance then if she has a problem being the first thing people see walking in the door. Big mouth on her, accusing everyone just going in for a cup of coffee of being a weirdo or something. Are a dozen people wrong to catch a glimpse of something a blind man would see or is she the one in the wrong? I think she is wrong and should have been more considerate to herself and her infant and sat further back where there were plenty of vacant tables, after all breast feeding a baby is a private affair, right?

    yeah doesn't bother you at all


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 381 ✭✭homosapien91


    How do you know?

    Just find it a bit exaggerated is all, just my opinion.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,960 ✭✭✭Deebles McBeebles


    So she actually said "what are you looking at" to people minding their own business while passing by? Never mind the breastfeeding, her attitude is the story.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 736 ✭✭✭Doff


    Did you try chat her up? Its fairly obvious she puts out so you could be onto a winner.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,122 ✭✭✭saintsaltynuts


    I walked into a cafe once.Women there with her tits hanging out.Baby was having Cornflakes.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,684 ✭✭✭✭lawred2


    So she actually said "what are you looking at" to people minding their own business while passing by? Never mind the breastfeeding, her attitude is the story.

    nope

    she directed a look :D

    I think the OP might be projecting a little


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,684 ✭✭✭✭lawred2


    I walked into a cafe once.Women there with her tits hanging out.Baby was having Cornflakes.

    What a terrible mother

    should have been weetabix


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,218 ✭✭✭✭Bannasidhe


    He just said he entered the shop and she was mouthing off and glaring at the people entering .

    Here, take me seat ......

    Doesn’t really make sense does it?

    She sounds like an attention seeker. If she wants to feed her baby in public , fine.

    If she doesn’t want people staring , do it in an area less discreet or just get on with it and feed your baby

    If I was sitting in a cafe near the door and people who came in felt the need to stare at me eating I'd be fairly irritable pretty quickly.

    Here's a mad idea: don't stare at people eating regardless of their age, what they are eating, where they are eating it. It's none of anyone's business.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,669 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    SusieBlue wrote: »
    The mothers bizarre attitude aside, breastfeeding is not something that needs to be done privately.
    Unless you are of the opinion that bottle fed babies should also be fed privately?

    Even with her attitude it's fine. The kid could have been up all night crying. And it could have been the 20th night in a row. I'd cut the woman some slack.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,876 ✭✭✭Feisar


    seamus wrote: »
    Sure. She never made it his problem though.

    So why does he care?

    Like I say, if it annoyed him so much, he could have had a bit of empathy and tried to help.

    No no, maybe a rant on the Internet is more appropriate.

    According to the OP and to be fair that's all we have to go on here, the woman was being very belligerent about a percieved slight.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 664 ✭✭✭starbaby2003


    iamwhoiam wrote: »
    Of course she can , but why is she glaring at everyone who happens to pass by then? I am entitled to sit with my cup of coffee without being accused of something I didnt do when I am in a cafe

    I think the story is bull****. I find it very hard to believe a woman sat at the door shouting at people entering and staff did nothing. I frequent a lot of cafes and have never seen this. Sounds like someone who got caught staring and was embarrassed. In order to make themselves feel better has added a couple of levels to the story ...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,960 ✭✭✭Autecher


    Cranky breast feeding woman in cafe

    Why was the breast cranky and what was it feeding the woman?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,669 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    seamus wrote: »
    Sure. She never made it his problem though.

    So why does he care?

    Like I say, if it annoyed him so much, he could have had a bit of empathy and tried to help.

    No no, maybe a rant on the Internet is more appropriate.

    To be fair if he offered to let the baby suck his nipple he might have got turfed out.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 554 ✭✭✭Fiftyfilthy


    Bannasidhe wrote: »
    He just said he entered the shop and she was mouthing off and glaring at the people entering .

    Here, take me seat ......

    Doesn’t really make sense does it?

    She sounds like an attention seeker. If she wants to feed her baby in public , fine.

    If she doesn’t want people staring , do it in an area less discreet or just get on with it and feed your baby

    If I was sitting in a cafe near the door and people who came in felt the need to stare at me eating I'd be fairly irritable pretty quickly.

    Here's a mad idea: don't stare at people eating regardless of their age, what they are eating, where they are eating it. It's none of anyone's business.


    Why is she not watching her child and getting on with the feeding than staring at everyone coming in?

    People can’t stare at her (unintentionally) but she can ? Double standards


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    I think the story is bull****. I find it very hard to believe a woman sat at the door shouting at people entering and staff did nothing. I frequent a lot of cafes and have never seen this. Sounds like someone who got caught staring and was embarrassed. In order to make themselves feel better has added a couple of levels to the story ...

    Yeah most women I know who breastfeed dread drawing attention to themselves for fear of attracting negative comments.

    I find it hard to believe that a woman sat in full view, fully exposed, barking abuse at anyone who dared to make eye contact with her.

    It isn't reflective of my personal experience, at least.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,960 ✭✭✭Deebles McBeebles


    SusieBlue wrote: »
    I find it hard to believe that a woman sat in full view, fully exposed, barking abuse at anyone who dared to make eye contact with her.

    You usually have to pay good money for that sort of thing.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,315 ✭✭✭nthclare


    She's probably one of those paranoid people who asks everyone "whad or youw stharin at hu"

    I'd find it funny really, although we're not allowed to look at people anymore, as we're invading their space.

    I tend to walk straight ahead not looking at anyone really, unless an attractive looking silver haired lady was walking towards me.


    I love the silver fox look, can't ignore it, some day the fox might bite the head off me....

    I'll be emasculated :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,218 ✭✭✭✭Bannasidhe


    Why is she not watching her child and getting on with the feeding than staring at everyone coming in?

    People can’t stare at her (unintentionally) but she can ? Double standards

    You appear to be completely unfamiliar with the mechanics of breast feeding, But to be fair so do many of the posters here.

    In simple terms - the baby latches onto the nipple - meaning their head is blocking much of the breast from view. Additionally, the latching/sucking can cause the nipple to crack meaning it can be a very painful experience for the woman. You also want her to cast her gaze downwards the whole time...?!?!

    What are you talking about? She, apparently, was responding to people staring at her.

    People so fecking ignorant they feel they have the right to stare at a woman because she is performing a perfectly natural function that makes them uncomfortable because they are so immature all they can think is "she's got her tit's out".


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,315 ✭✭✭nthclare


    Bannasidhe wrote: »
    You appear to be completely unfamiliar with the mechanics of breast feeding, But to be fair so do many of the posters here.

    In simple terms - the baby latches onto the nipple - meaning their head is blocking much of the breast from view. Additionally, the latching/sucking can cause the nipple to crack meaning it can be a very painful experience for the woman.

    What are you talking about? She, apparently, was responding to people staring at her.

    People so fecking ignorant they feel they have the right to stare at a woman because she is performing a perfectly natural function that makes them uncomfortable because they are so immature all they can think is "she's got her tit's out".

    But wasn't the woman staring at everyone herself.

    My friend breast feeds and just sits there and doesn't care if they stare.

    She's quite secure in herself.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,080 ✭✭✭✭Big Nasty


    Was she giving off a Feminazi vibe OP?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,847 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    Swing low sweet chariots.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 554 ✭✭✭Fiftyfilthy


    Bannasidhe wrote: »
    Why is she not watching her child and getting on with the feeding than staring at everyone coming in?

    People can’t stare at her (unintentionally) but she can ? Double standards

    You appear to be completely unfamiliar with the mechanics of breast feeding, But to be fair so do many of the posters here.

    In simple terms - the baby latches onto the nipple - meaning their head is blocking much of the breast from view. Additionally, the latching/sucking can cause the nipple to crack meaning it can be a very painful experience for the woman. You also want her to cast her gaze downwards the whole time...?!?!

    What are you talking about? She, apparently, was responding to people staring at her.

    People so fecking ignorant they feel they have the right to stare at a woman because she is performing a perfectly natural function that makes them uncomfortable because they are so immature all they can think is "she's got her tit's out".


    I wouldn’t class myself as immature , if someone happened to be in my immediate view of sight when entering the front door

    It is human nature, people observe anything in the immediate sight as could be a hazard, threat etc

    The woman Breast feeding has nothing to do with it, just so happens she is sitting directly at the door and is the first thing people see. I would quickly glance if it was an oap, or anyone else sitting there

    If the woman gave a comment to me I would just tell her to “ **** off” and carry on with my day


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