Kids with phones

facehugger99

My Sister in law's sister just got her kid an iPhone 6 for her birthday - she turned 9 - the kid that is, not my sister in law's sister.

It kinda struck a chord with me because a colleague in work was saying at lunchtime that the teachers in her kids' primary school are trying to stop parents from getting the kids phones - apparently some of them were in snapchat group with older kids from secondary school and there was all kinds of inappropriate stuff being posted - hardcore porn apparently and some of the kids in the group were 10 or 11 years old.


We don't let kids drink alcohol or smoke so should there be restrictions on phone ownership too.

So - should kids below 12 be banned from owning a smartphone?

Speak your brains After Hours.

One eyed Jack

facehugger99 wrote: »

So - should kids below 12 be banned from owning a smartphone?

No.

A thread similar to this came up recently and I agreed with a poster who said that some children actually need an education in using a phone appropriately. It's a tool like any other, and the idea of banning phones because they expose children to inappropriate content is like suggesting that the Encyclopaedia Britannica should have been banned back when I was a child, because it exposed me to inappropriate content.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

facehugger99 wrote: »

My Sister in law's sister just got her kid an iPhone 6 for her birthday - she turned 9 - the kid that is, not my sister in law's sister.

It kinda struck a chord with me because a colleague in work was saying at lunchtime that the teachers in her kids' primary school are trying to stop parents from getting the kids phones - apparently some of them were in snapchat group with older kids from secondary school and there was all kinds of inappropriate stuff being posted - hardcore porn apparently and some of the kids in the group were 10 or 11 years old.


We don't let kids drink alcohol or smoke so should there be restrictions on phone ownership too.

So - should kids below 12 be banned from owning a smartphone?

Speak your brains After Hours.

No, they just need to be educated on how and what to use it for responsibly. Same as any other form of media. Also, parents need to pay a lot more attention to what their kids are doing on said smartphone.

NIMAN

One eyed Jack wrote: »

No.

A thread similar to this came up recently and I agreed with a poster who said that some children actually need an education in using a phone appropriately. It's a tool like any other, and the idea of banning phones because they expose children to inappropriate content is like suggesting that the Encyclopaedia Britannica should have been banned back when I was a child, because it exposed me to inappropriate content.

Bit of a stretch comparing EB with hardcore porn on the net.

Odelay

One eyed Jack wrote: »

No.

A thread similar to this came up recently and I agreed with a poster who said that some children actually need an education in using a phone appropriately. It's a tool like any other, and the idea of banning phones because they expose children to inappropriate content is like suggesting that the Encyclopaedia Britannica should have been banned back when I was a child, because it exposed me to inappropriate content.

There was hardcore pron in Encyclopaedia Britannica?? My parents only bought them as far as D

Cee-Jay-Cee

I think 12 or 13 is time enough for them to have their own phone. We used to allow our daughters 5 and 7yrs old our phones for an hour on Saturday mornings so that we could get a bit of a lie in but have found that it effects their moods for the entire day, theyre snappy and fight with each other far more. They haven't had them for the last 4 weeks and there have been no rows, no tantrums or crying,its been bliss. We'll gladly sacrifice the lie-in's for happier children.

If I had my way they wouldn't have phones until they can buy their own and pay their own bills/credit but that's unlikely to happen as I also don't want them to be the odd-ones-out among their friends who will most likely have phones long before my two will but i'll hold off as long as possible.

Grandeeod

facehugger99 wrote: »

My Sister in law's sister just got her kid an iPhone 6 for her birthday - she turned 9 - the kid that is, not my sister in law's sister.

Isn't your Sister in Laws Sister, your Sister in Law?

One eyed Jack

NIMAN wrote: »

Bit of a stretch comparing EB with hardcore porn on the net.

Odelay wrote: »

There was hardcore pron in Encyclopaedia Britannica?? My parents only bought them as far as D

Jaysis lads, context! Context is everything :pac:

I probably should have used National Geographic magazine as an example instead of the idea that while there is what could be considered age inappropriate content in the magazines, or the encyclopaedias, or indeed on the internet - there is a vast body of knowledge that we would be denying the vast majority of children, because of the inappropriate actions of a tiny minority.

We could spend a lot of effort banning every opportunity and avenue which would expose children to inappropriate content, or, we could take the approach to educate children in how to use tools like mobile phones and internet access in an appropriate way to educate themselves about societies, cultures, history, geography, science and technology, etc.

No they shouldn't and I don't really see how it is even feasible or fair. This is probably the last generation where this will even be discussed as tech is just going to be part of everyone's lives.

I don't have kids yet but if/when I do they are going to be brought up with tech as I am very much into it myself between both work and pleasure. My phone is never out of my hand, iPads always on the go laptops open nearly always open for work or entertainment etc and then all other stuff like home entertainment systems etc.

Even if you wanted (which I wouldn't) how could you tell a child they can't use tech while you are constantly using it yourself in front of them.

Try_harder

Grandeeod wrote: »

Isn't your Sister in Laws Sister, your Sister in Law?

No, it could be his brother's wife's sister.

Roger Hassenforder

Grandeeod wrote: »

Isn't your Sister in Laws Sister, your Sister in Law?

Your sister in law's sister, could be your wife.

NIMAN

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Jaysis lads, context! Context is everything :pac:

I probably should have used National Geographic magazine as an example instead of the idea that while there is what could be considered age inappropriate content in the magazines, or the encyclopaedias, or indeed on the internet - there is a vast body of knowledge that we would be denying the vast majority of children, because of the inappropriate actions of a tiny minority.

We could spend a lot of effort banning every opportunity and avenue which would expose children to inappropriate content, or, we could take the approach to educate children in how to use tools like mobile phones and internet access in an appropriate way to educate themselves about societies, cultures, history, geography, science and technology, etc.

There's no inappropriate content in EB from what I can think of.

Grandeeod

Try_harder wrote: »

No, it could be his brother's wife's sister.

Yup. Grand. Carry on.

Abz26

I got my first phone when i was about eight or nine years of age if i remember right, Simply so my family could get in contact with me and checkup on me or incase of an emergency, The thing is back then all you could do was call or text, I understand that times have changed and phones are basically like computers these days but in my own opinion if your child is going to be going out playing or whatever they are doing outside of your home they should have a phone for safety reasons.

I must admit that there are times during the day that I'd love to give my 3-year-old a call while she's at playschool just to hear her latest fantastical story/adventure in her day told in such a crazily cute and dramatic way.

Roger Hassenforder

Edward Old Egg wrote: »

No they shouldn't and I don't really see how it is even feasible or fair. This is probably the last generation where this will even be discussed as tech is just going to be part of everyone's lives.

I don't have kids yet but if/when I do they are going to be brought up with tech as I am very much into it myself between both work and pleasure. My phone is never out of my hand, iPads always on the go laptops open nearly always open for work or entertainment etc and then all other stuff like home entertainment systems etc.

Even if you wanted (which I wouldn't) how could you tell a child they can't use tech while you are constantly using it yourself in front of them.

Would you let them have a drop of Merlot with their chicken nuggets?

Saying yes is easy, saying no is difficult. But its being a parent, setting limits and boundaries. Life isnt fair, kids need to learn it. You will see a problem with kids and unrestricted access to technology, its not that theyll turn into a tech geek, its they'll be miserable. They'll struggle socially.

Kids dont be long telling/asking you to put down the phone and give them a bit of attention. We need to lead by example. Too many of my friends and family are having serious issues with their kids. We have it with a minor xbox addiction and his behaviour problems, but we had to have an intervention. It might be too late for my nephew, who has very serious behaviour and social problems.

I could be completely wrong and things will be fine. Best of luck

NIMAN

100% agree.

Saying yes is the easy option taken by so many parents these days.

aziz

Odelay wrote: »

There was hardcore pron in Encyclopaedia Britannica?? My parents only bought them as far as D

It was DD when they started to get interesting :P

NIMAN

100% agree.

Saying yes is the easy option taken by so many parents these days.

368100

Theres a reason why theres a minimum age of 13 to register an apple ID but a majority of parents ignore this which is bad enough but then to hand it to younger kids without setting the built in parental controls is just mindless.

freshpopcorn

I'm 26 we got phones in about fourth class in primary school. We did have slow internet access at first and we were on social media(Bebo) from Sixth class and then we moved onto Facebook/Smart Phones in the second half of secondary school.
Just in my experience those who were dozy and did silly things online when we were teenagers are still the same in their twenties.

James Bond Junior

As a senior end teacher in a primary school I can categorically say children under 14/15 have no business with smart phones. They cause constant issues outside school which spills into the school day. The kids with no phones are noticeably calmer and more well adjusted than those without. I suggested a digital detox for lent one year and you'd swear I asked them to give up their confirmation money.

I can envisage sales of smartphones to under 16s being made illegal in the next decade.

One eyed Jack

NIMAN wrote: »

There's no inappropriate content in EB from what I can think of.

That's kinda my point, that from say your perspective, or even from my perspective as an eight year old child there was no inappropriate content in it either, and from my own child's perspective, there's no inappropriate content on the internet (as far as he is aware), but from my parents perspective, there was an abundance of inappropriate content in the EB, particularly relating to topics like sex and sexuality, reproduction, different beliefs of different cultures and religions and so on.

Fortunately for me, they decided that it was more beneficial in terms of my education to allow me to read the EB, than not. In the same way, I decided that it was better in terms of his education to allow my child to have a mobile phone from when he was about six years of age, till now when he's 13. He's grown up with the technology, understands it better than many children his age, and knows how to use it to further his own education.

Recently however he did ask could he get an iPhone, "because all my friends have iPhones". Good to see he has a healthy sense of humour at least, chancer! :pac:

NIMAN

I think schools should ban them. At least in primary schools.

James Bond Junior

NIMAN wrote: »

I think schools should ban them. At least in primary schools.

Unusual for a school not to. It's what they're allowed at home is the problem. A lot of parents forget that they are primary educators, not the child's teacher.

Roger Hassenforder

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

Would you let them have a drop of Merlot with their chicken nuggets?

Saying yes is easy, saying no is difficult. But its being a parent, setting limits and boundaries. Life isnt fair, kids need to learn it. You will see a problem with kids and unrestricted access to technology, its not that theyll turn into a tech geek, its they'll be miserable. They'll struggle socially.

Kids dont be long telling/asking you to put down the phone and give them a bit of attention. We need to lead by example. Too many of my friends and family are having serious issues with their kids. We have it with a minor xbox addiction and his behaviour problems, but we had to have an intervention. It might be too late for my nephew, who has very serious behaviour and social problems.

I could be completely wrong and things will be fine. Best of luck

I don't think you get it, it wouldn't be a matter of saying yes or no any child I would have would be immersed in technology as they couldn't avoid it in my house and levels of tech are increasing all the time not decreasing.

John_Rambo

Edward Old Egg wrote: »

I don't think you get it, any child I would have would be immersed in technology as they couldn't avoid it in my house and it's increasing all the time not decreasing.

Kids brains process things differently to adults. You're heading in to a world of woe of you think you can immerse them in tech at an early age. Give a four to seven year old an iPad for two hours and witness the aftermath.

Grandeeod

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

Would you let them have a drop of Merlot with their chicken nuggets?

Saying yes is easy, saying no is difficult. But its being a parent, setting limits and boundaries. Life isnt fair, kids need to learn it. You will see a problem with kids and unrestricted access to technology, its not that theyll turn into a tech geek, its they'll be miserable. They'll struggle socially.

Kids dont be long telling/asking you to put down the phone and give them a bit of attention. We need to lead by example. Too many of my friends and family are having serious issues with their kids. We have it with a minor xbox addiction and his behaviour problems, but we had to have an intervention. It might be too late for my nephew, who has very serious behaviour and social problems.

I could be completely wrong and things will be fine. Best of luck

I agree. I've seen it happening to kids and still do. My own 10 year old daughter has a laptop and tablet and a PS4. Sounds awful doesn't it? However she saw Mammy and I using laptops for work. She knows what they do beyond games and the web and uses it accordingly down to basic stuff like word processing. The tablet isn't used much unless its for photos on the go which I encourage along with photo editing software. The PS4 is controlled and shared out. I saw the start of over exposure to tech and the digital hangover that crept in and affected her. I'm lucky in that I'm of an age that lived without all this tech, learned about the tech, embraced it and understood it.

However the smart phone is a different thing altogether as it isn't as complicated or intimidating as an actual computer, hence its mass appeal for accessing the web. I fear that a lot of parents have only ever accessed the web via a smart phone/tablet and see it as an entertainment/instant communication device and simply don't realize the many dangers to kids from the web and over exposure.

My daughter hasn't shown any interest in one yet. But she's talked to on a regular basis about tech as its part of the household and it's luckily (in a positive way) a very tech household. How many on Boards only ever accessed the web via a phone or tablet?

Church on Tuesday

No 9 year old needs a phone.

Not judging the parents or anything, but c'mon.

I'd tell the kid to go play outside with her friends and use her imagination.

Roger Hassenforder

Edward Old Egg wrote: »

I don't think you get it, it wouldn't be a matter of saying yes or no any child I would have would be immersed in technology as they couldn't avoid it in my house and levels of tech are increasing all the time not decreasing.

Im not having a go at you, but unfortunately i do get it.

I love technology. I also love my kids. Sometimes more. And im not a luddite. My kids have laptops and tablets. They can use our smartphones better than i can. But i watch their content, i have settings as good as i can get them. I check their histories and emails (they dont know yet). But they are not allowed devices in their rooms. Times are controlled, sometimes we've to bate* them off their devices, and there is murder. We see huge differences in them if we send them to bed after laptop/xbox time as opposed to some tv time, yea theres a big difference between the effect on them.

This isnt an "appeal to authority", its an appeal to experience. sometimes its good to listen to those who have learned from their mistakes. Maybe you wont make them.
But a kid has no business with a smartfone until 14 or 15. (A talk &text fone is fine for contact).

But seriously, best of look raising a kid "immersed in technology".
Maybe you'll be the first to nail it...

Stigura

Grandeeod wrote: »

Isn't your Sister in Laws Sister, your Sister in Law?

Try_harder wrote: »

No, it could be his brother's wife's sister.

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

Your sister in law's sister, could be your wife.

Stop It! :pac:

Defunkd

Until mine can afford to buy an iphone with their own money, they can text and call from a regular machine. When they show the cop on and discipline to save for it, hopefully they'll have some sliver of maturity in using it.

Samuel T. Cogley

facehugger99 wrote: »

My Sister in law's sister just got her kid an iPhone 6 for her birthday - she turned 9 - the kid that is, not my sister in law's sister.

It kinda struck a chord with me because a colleague in work was saying at lunchtime that the teachers in her kids' primary school are trying to stop parents from getting the kids phones - apparently some of them were in snapchat group with older kids from secondary school and there was all kinds of inappropriate stuff being posted - hardcore porn apparently and some of the kids in the group were 10 or 11 years old.


We don't let kids drink alcohol or smoke so should there be restrictions on phone ownership too.

So - should kids below 12 be banned from owning a smartphone?

Speak your brains After Hours.

That's absolutely fecking scandalous. An iPhone 6 the cheap sods... :pac:

Hector Bellend

Nothing a good crack on the arse wouldnt cure

Flippyfloppy

Phones are much more than just phones these days, adults only I say

Samuel T. Cogley

Flippyfloppy wrote: »

Phones are much more than just phones these days, adults only I say

While I wouldn't go as far as banning them, a parent that doesn't check the phone of a young child daily is just asking for trouble. There are far too many stories of blackmail, grooming and kiddie porn floating around.

PandaPoo

My 8 year old has a phone. It's just a minion one with no camera, no internet access, and only has 4 numbers in it. He only takes it when he's at his dad's house or sleeping in my parents.

When he went to his dad's last week his dad had a bad fight with his girlfriend and my son was upset. I bought him the phone so he can ring me or my husband, or our parents to get him if something like that happens again.

He's really making the most of it.

blanch152

Grandeeod wrote: »

Isn't your Sister in Laws Sister, your Sister in Law?

No, his sister-in-law's sister is his wife. Just wanted to disguise it.

Cee-Jay-Cee

Edward Old Egg wrote: »

I don't have kids yet but if/when I do they are going to be brought up with tech as I am very much into it myself between both work and pleasure. My phone is never out of my hand, iPads always on the go laptops open nearly always open for work or entertainment etc and then all other stuff like home entertainment systems etc.

Even if you wanted (which I wouldn't) how could you tell a child they can't use tech while you are constantly using it yourself in front of them.

You are making a rod for your own back, as they say. There is and has been considerable media attention to this whole subject recently. Children’s behaviour is clearly influenced by access to too much technology. Children should be allowed to be children and develop naturally without technological aids.

You say you are going to bring your children up with technology but I suspect when the time comes you may think differently.

Samuel T. Cogley

PandaPoo wrote: »

My 8 year old has a phone. It's just a minion one with no camera, no internet access, and only has 4 numbers in it. He only takes it when he's at his dad's house or sleeping in my parents.

When he went to his dad's last week his dad had a bad fight with his girlfriend and my son was upset. I bought him the phone so he can ring me or my husband, or our parents to get him if something like that happens again.

He's really making the most of it.

Your kid is called Benzo?! You don't live in North Dublin do you? I'd be careful with that! :pac:

_Brian

One eyed Jack wrote: »

No.

A thread similar to this came up recently and I agreed with a poster who said that some children actually need an education in using a phone appropriately. It's a tool like any other, and the idea of banning phones because they expose children to inappropriate content is like suggesting that the Encyclopaedia Britannica should have been banned back when I was a child, because it exposed me to inappropriate content.

Must have been a special edition Britannica ye had of it exposed you to the same stuff kids have access to on phones. And could you send photos and everything with it.

Smartphones are inappropriate for 9yo kids. Too many parents are trying too hard to be friends to their kids rather than parents.

NIMAN

Phones and tablets are raring some children these days.

Sad but true.

PandaPoo

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

Your kid is called Benzo?! You don't live in North Dublin do you? I'd be careful with that! :pac:

Ha it's his nickname. He gave it to himself when he was 2 and that's what everyone calls him.

Samuel T. Cogley

PandaPoo wrote: »

Ha it's his nickname. He gave it to himself when he was 2 and that's what everyone calls him.

I was struck by how much that looks like an exchange between me and the wife. I'm going to show it too her next time she tells me I'm the immature one!

OldMrBrennan83

This post has been deleted.

endacl

Edward Old Egg wrote: »

Even if you wanted (which I wouldn't) how could you tell a child they can't use tech while you are constantly using it yourself in front of them.

I do that. Car, etc...

One eyed Jack

Cee-Jay-Cee wrote: »

You are making a rod for your own back, as they say. There is and has been considerable media attention to this whole subject recently. Children’s behaviour is clearly influenced by access to too much technology. Children should be allowed to be children and develop naturally without technological aids.

You say you are going to bring your children up with technology but I suspect when the time comes you may think differently.

Well when sensationalist media is your source for how you choose to raise your children, you'll be more naturally inclined to react in a knee-jerk fashion to every moral panic story you read.

Children's behaviour and attitudes are undoubtedly influenced by their access to technology, and you can look at that in two ways - both the negative, and the positive effects of said exposure. Children are being children when technology provides them with a means to develop their personal, social, communication and technological skills. Most importantly, a smartphone isn't just a content consumer device, it's first and foremost a communications device, which enables children to communicate and convey and share their ideas with the world around them in ways we hadn't even imagined possible or envisioned 20 years ago.

I've brought my child up immersed in and surrounded by technology, they're still a child, they just haven't been raised according to how you would choose to raise your children, but I'm not going to say you're making a rod for your own back by not immersing your child in technology at as early an age as possible. Different strokes for different folks and all that.

NIMAN

Anyone who thinks that a young child having a smartphone at a very early age is a good thing, is fooling themselves.

If kids are replacing books, outside play, playing with friends, getting mucky, painting, lego, football, bikes with staring at a screen, its a disaster waiting to happen.

McTigs

John_Rambo wrote: »

Kids brains process things differently to adults. You're heading in to a world of woe of you think you can immerse them in tech at an early age. Give a four to seven year old an iPad for two hours and witness the aftermath.

yup, we’ve pulled way back from it in our house. Deleted social media apps from phones and iPads (it’s actually startling how not bothered I am with Facebook now that I have go to the trouble of actually opening a laptop).... we’re not looking at our phones constantly, the kids are not getting annoyed from lack of attention, no iPad tantrums ( see Rambo’s quote above) and they never complain about being bored anymore (always when any lull was filled with a screen) and everyone is way way happier.

Technology is great but the interface as presented on smartphones and tablets is like heroin to kids.... really dangerous, I’m just glad we copped on in time.

On topic, iPhone 6 for a 9 year old? Terrible terrible idea.

Defunkd

NIMAN wrote: »

If kids are replacing books, outside play, playing with friends, getting mucky, painting, lego, football, bikes with staring at a screen, its a disaster waiting to happen.

I read that watching a screen where the picture changes a lot actually tricks the brain into thinking it is more active and the brain releases endorphins as a response or reward. It can be addictive.

Graces7

Edward Old Egg wrote: »

No they shouldn't and I don't really see how it is even feasible or fair. This is probably the last generation where this will even be discussed as tech is just going to be part of everyone's lives.

I don't have kids yet but if/when I do they are going to be brought up with tech as I am very much into it myself between both work and pleasure. My phone is never out of my hand, iPads always on the go laptops open nearly always open for work or entertainment etc and then all other stuff like home entertainment systems etc.

Even if you wanted (which I wouldn't) how could you tell a child they can't use tech while you are constantly using it yourself in front of them.

Same way as you would smoke or drink, or other adult things, in front of them . And we are not all as.... dependent on phones etc as you are