Got my ear pierced - Should i be worried?

LegacyUser

I'm a middle aged fella working in finance in a fairly well to do aircraft leasing firm in Dublin. I've always wanted an ear piercing but put it off over work fears. Decided to do it (completely sober I might add) last Saturday.

I went in this morning and i'd people looking at my ear whilst talking to me all day. Eventually it was brought up during lunch and we had a laugh. But I've a meeting with the boss tomorrow afternoon and he hasn't said why, it was a very out of the blue request for a chat.

There's nothing in the employee handbook to say piercings are forbidden, in fact I think one is allowed. I only got a small sized black ball. I'm only in this place about 4 months and have been getting on with all the lads in the office, and I think I'm doing an alright job. Just wondering if anyone has an experience trying something mildly outlandish with their appearance and getting told off by the boss?

I wore long hair when I worked in a garage before and was asked to shave it off by the boss once day, had no problem with that as it was a frontline services job and for hygienic reasons. But I'd be really disappointed if I was asked to remove my ear ring just because it was a bit out of the blue.

ANXIOUS

So was it about the ear ring?

Tenigate

Op, regardless of what the meeting was about ... You had your fun, now get rid if the earring.

job seeker

Tenigate wrote: »

Op, regardless of what the meeting was about ... You had your fun, now get rid if the earring.

Any reason why you think they should?

I personally think everyone should have the right to express themselves through tattoos or ear rings or whatever they wish. What's the issue with it, as long as the person can do their job.

Tenigate

job seeker, interesting username. I won't even point out the irony.

LirW

It's a small earring. Women usually have at least one per ear. It's an inoffensive black stud. Honestly I don't see how this can be a problem with your boss. A piercing directly in the face might be another kettle of fish.

I would find it very difficult to take a middle aged man wearing an ear stud or ring seriously. In fact, I couldn't take them seriously. It's a finance position in an aircraft leasing firm. It's office work, where a professional appearance and demeanour are generally expected. If you drive a forklift in a warehouse or plaster farm sheds, it's a whole other thing.

I worked with a guy who had maybe 6-7 piercings down his left ear, probably many years ago. The holes are still just visible and ever since i spotted them I can't take him seriously at all. He doesn't realise it but the holes in his ear mean I've refused to bring him onto projects for the last 4 years where he'd meet with customers. My reason was perfectly acceptable too.

He's totally oblivious to it but he earns a lot less than he could (for the same workload) and is held back in his career generally as a result of doing stupid things like getting his ears pierced.

By all means, get holes put in your ears as a grown man. Your choice. Don't expect everyone to be okay with your strange behaviour.

MissTheDome

JayZeus wrote: »

Don't expect everyone to be okay with your strange behaviour.

I actually had to read that twice....
He has a stud in his ear. He's not walking around with his lad in his hand reciting Shakespeare to the plant pot.

Personally OP, i think you should reconsider the choice of wearing the earing.
I don't wear jewelry to work, sometimes your career dictates your dress. Discretion or desire? It's entirely your choice if not contractual.

MissTheDome

MissTheDome wrote: »

I actually had to read that twice....
He has a stud in his ear. He's not walking around with his lad in his hand reciting Shakespeare to the plant pot.

Personally OP, i think you should reconsider the choice of wearing the earing.
I don't wear jewelry to work, sometimes your career dictates your dress. Discretion or desire? It's entirely your choice if not contractual.

You can read it as many times as you need. :P

A grown man working in a disciplined and professional office environment who appears one day with a piece of superfluous jewelry stuck in the hole he just put in his ear will raise some eyebrows.

It's questionable judgement to be honest and brings focus on the OP that may not be at all desireable, especially when only in the job a few months. It's weird carry on. You don't have to like it to acknowledge it being so.

georgewickstaff

All the IBEC blowhards preaching about madness and doom. If you came in to work wearing red socks these weirdos would be posting similar stuff. While you might look like Nick Heyward I wouldn't even entertain any questions about it. Do yourself a favour and ask for this thread to be closed as it will attract the usual suspects like fleas to a camel's crotch.

LirW

The OP talked about a small black stud, which would be pretty much that.
I can't get my head around that this could cause a lot of bother.

Women with short hair usually wear at least one on each ear, doesn't bother anyone. I had people showing up at meetings dressed in such unprofessional ways yet they were pretty influential.
If it would be my office, I wouldn't care really. It's not that he has 7 of them and a tattooed neck.

Recliner

MissTheDome wrote: »

I actually had to read that twice....
He has a stud in his ear. He's not walking around with his lad in his hand reciting Shakespeare to the plant pot.

I've had a sh*t week at work and this has made me laugh out loud. Thank you for that.. (unfortunate image stuck in my head now but worth it)..

Hey! I said hey!

JayZeus wrote: »

I would find it very difficult to take a middle aged man wearing an ear stud or ring seriously. In fact, I couldn't take them seriously. It's a finance position in an aircraft leasing firm. It's office work, where a professional appearance and demeanour are generally expected. If you drive a forklift in a warehouse or plaster farm sheds, it's a whole other thing.

I worked with a guy who had maybe 6-7 piercings down his left ear, probably many years ago. The holes are still just visible and ever since i spotted them I can't take him seriously at all. He doesn't realise it but the holes in his ear mean I've refused to bring him onto projects for the last 4 years where he'd meet with customers. My reason was perfectly acceptable too.

He's totally oblivious to it but he earns a lot less than he could (for the same workload) and is held back in his career generally as a result of doing stupid things like getting his ears pierced.

By all means, get holes put in your ears as a grown man. Your choice. Don't expect everyone to be okay with your strange behaviour.

I’m glad I don’t work for you...

Hey! I said hey!

Hey! I said hey! wrote: »

I’m glad I don’t work for you...

Me too.

job seeker

Tenigate wrote: »

job seeker, interesting username. I won't even point out the irony.

It's only a username.. :rolleyes:

Now, would you like to answer my previous quistion.

eeguy

Just take it out for the meeting.
If your boss wants you to get rid of it then you've preempted him.
If it for something else, then throw it back in after.
Be grand.

Pelvis

What next op, leather pants? Stop the madness!

eeguy

Pelvis wrote: »

What next op, leather pants? Stop the madness!

Gold pants rolled up beyond the knees with a beret, flip flops and smoking jacket.

doolox

I find that finance related employers to be the most conservative, servile and querellous people on the planet. Your boss is probably thinking that the Bolsheviks will take over Buckingham Palace if he allows you to wear the earring and is probably frightened of his customers and superiors reaction to the offending earpiece.

Best to be aware of the consequences and choices which need to be made.

What chance equality if having a penis means you cannot wear earrings at work?

job seeker

I have my own ear pierced with a stud, had it done when I was 12. I've worked in different jobs such as shops, industrial kitchens and I.T. in the local council. Nobody has had an issue with it yet. I'd also not downgrade myself to work for someone so judgemental. I'd say you'd be grand op.. What exactly can they do anyway?

the_pen_turner

its a tricky situation. especially for an employer.
if you work for a company you represent them.
what you wear, the way you cut your hair(Mohawks man buns, etc) tattoos , piercings all kind of things will effect how the customer views their representative

any decent company will be trying to control these things to keep their representatives looking the way they want.
you as an employee mightn't like it but its the way employers have to think

Grab All Association

Boss: The dress code specifically forbids the wearing of earrings unless you're of Gypsy extraction.

OP: Well, I'm a Gypsy.

Boss: Oh, really? Prove it.

OP: "I 'vant' to suck your blood!"

Boss: Nuh-uh. That's a vampire. But, uh, they're also covered. Carry on.

muggles

I work in this exact business, have done for nearly 20 years now and can honestly say I've never come across a male wearing an earring in any finance, legal, technical, commercial etc. role. If you want to be taken seriously, remove the earring. It's just not the business for it.

Teyla Emmagan

Come on, what happened?

c6ysaphjvqw41k

This post has been deleted.

SusieBlue

To a degree I can understand it not looking professional so would agree with the advice to remove it. Better to be safe than sorry.

But to suggest that it is ok for someone to be paid less and not be brought onto suitable projects because the holes from piercings YEARS previous are still visible is both ridiculous and extremely unfair. Thank goodness the poor man doesn't know these are the reasons that he is being held back because I don't think the excuse of "he had pierced ears 7 years ago, before he worked here" would stand up all too well at an employment tribunal.
Its almost discriminatory.

Would he be given the same treatment if he had a number of scars on his ear, I wonder?

The OP is working in what sounds like a very conservative industry, company and role and he is very new to the company.

It is ok for many people to say that having piercings didn't and shouldn't impact their jobs but not every workplace is the same.

In an ideal world it shouldn't matter but this isn't an ideal world.

I have an image in my head of Saudi Shieks in full traditional outfit being wooed by this company looking across the table in horror at a man with an earring.

There's always a majority who reply to these threads or thank the posts of people who argue with, criticise or straight out ridicule those who write the truth.

I don't care if you're glad you don't work for me. I don't care if you think it's old fashioned BS. I don't care if you're hurt or offended that there are people who judge others based on how they speak, dress or act.

It's not 'borderline discrimination' to decide that a middle aged man turning up in the office with his ear pierced is odd behaviour. It's not 'borderline discrimination' to keep an employee who has, by their own choice, 'modified' their body in a way that makes their appearance objectionable to others, out of meetings with people who decide where their company will spend their money.

It's discrimination. It's recognising the difference between two or more alternatives. Otherwise simply known as making a choice. If that has a negative effect on their income, career or limits their options in life, that's absolutely their problem.

SusieBlue

Deleted User wrote: »

The OP is working in what sounds like a very conservative industry, company and role and he is very new to the company.

It is ok for many people to say that having piercings didn't and shouldn't impact their jobs but not every workplace is the same.

In an ideal world it shouldn't matter but this isn't an ideal world.

I have an image in my head of Saudi Shieks in full traditional outfit being wooed by this company looking across the table in horror at a man with an earring.

I completely agree with you. However, I think punishing someone for piercings they had almost a decade ago is a step too far and not a suitable reason to hold back another persons career.
By this logic, the mans career will suffer for the rest of his life, over a brief piercing on his ear he had before he started his job...What??

I have a scar on the side of my nose from a chickenpox spot that I picked as a child. I guess to some people, it might look like a healed piercing mark.
Should I not progress in my career because of this mark on my face?

TreyAz

JayZeus wrote: »

I would find it very difficult to take a middle aged man wearing an ear stud or ring seriously. In fact, I couldn't take them seriously. It's a finance position in an aircraft leasing firm. It's office work, where a professional appearance and demeanour are generally expected. If you drive a forklift in a warehouse or plaster farm sheds, it's a whole other thing.

I worked with a guy who had maybe 6-7 piercings down his left ear, probably many years ago. The holes are still just visible and ever since i spotted them I can't take him seriously at all. He doesn't realise it but the holes in his ear mean I've refused to bring him onto projects for the last 4 years where he'd meet with customers. My reason was perfectly acceptable too.

He's totally oblivious to it but he earns a lot less than he could (for the same workload) and is held back in his career generally as a result of doing stupid things like getting his ears pierced.

By all means, get holes put in your ears as a grown man. Your choice. Don't expect everyone to be okay with your strange behaviour.

Wow. You sound like my mum, and she's in her 80s. "Strange behaviour" 😂. Hate to break it to you but appearance isn't a cast iron guarantee of trustworthiness and professionalism, have you seen the state various bankers and politicians left the country in ?

AndrewJRenko

First obvious question would be to check if there is a corporate dress code. Really, it's hard to believe that in 2017 there are professionals so small-minded as to be worrying about an ear stud.

TreyAz

TreyAz wrote: »

Wow. You sound like my mum, and she's in her 80s. "Strange behaviour" ��. Hate to break it to you but appearance isn't a cast iron guarantee of trustworthiness and professionalism, have you seen the state various bankers and politicians left the country in ?

More of the same, and then some more. :rolleyes:

AndrewJRenko

AndrewJRenko wrote: »

...Really, it's hard to believe that in 2017 there are professionals so small-minded as to be worrying about an ear stud.

It's plain ignorance to suggest that a professional is small minded if they refuse to overlook the effect a middle aged man making the decision to get his ear pierced can have. Is it a minor enough concern? Yes. That doesn't mean it's irrelevant and won't have an impact, depending on the industry and customer base.

Do it, by all means. But don't be upset when it has a consequence you don't like.

AndrewJRenko

JayZeus wrote: »

It's plain ignorance to suggest that a professional is small minded if they refuse to overlook the effect a middle aged man making the decision to get his ear pierced can have.

What's the 'making a decision' got to do with it? Is there a cut-off age for men wearing black studs in their ears? Is there a cut-off age for men making a decision to pierce their ears?

NutmegGirl

Unfortunately there are plenty of overly conservative and superficial employers around, as evidenced by some of the comments here, OP so hopefully you won't be in trouble but don't be surprised if it's a problem
My sister was recently involved in an interview for a junior employee in her organisation , computer based so not as conservative as finance and not a position that has any face to face customer interaction
Her decision was overridden, the candidate hired has general skills in the area but not the required skills and has now to be babysat and trained up whereas her choice who was male, had one ear piercing and had all the necessary skills
She heard the bosses laughing about his piercing afterwards, that wasn't the reason given to him for not being hired obviously, but they're not the ones who have to babysit and train up the new guy wasting her time
Some people still think a man with a piercing must be gay, or a woman with a tattoo is weird etc
I recently stood behind a female Garda in a queue who had her nose pierced and a stud in her ear cartilage, I didn't think she wasn't a good guard
One of my daughter teachers at a recent parent teacher meeting had her nose pierced and numerous ear piercings, happens to be the best teacher in the school, I wasn't judging her on her appearance but on her ability to teach my child
Both positions with plenty of face to face contact but obviously more open minded employers who can see beyond the superficial
Years ago it's not a stretch to say these would have been the same people who wouldn't hire based on the colour of someone's skin, or their accents in case it would reflect badly on them as people or the company, assuming that their clients would all be as narrow minded as they are, but having no way of knowing that

NutmegGirl

NutmegGirl wrote: »

Years ago it's not a stretch to say these would have been the same people who wouldn't hire based on the colour of someone's skin, or their accents in case it would reflect badly on them as people or the company, assuming that their clients would all be as narrow minded as they are, but having no way of knowing that

Yes, it's a stretch. A big stretch. All we're missing is Godwin's Law at this stage. :rolleyes:

triggermortis

muggles wrote: »

I work in this exact business, have done for nearly 20 years now and can honestly say I've never come across a male wearing an earring in any finance, legal, technical, commercial etc. role. If you want to be taken seriously, remove the earring. It's just not the business for it.

I work in engineering and have several piercings in both ears and have never had any problems with being taken seriously. I got the first 2 many years ago when I was in the military, so obviously I had to remove/hide them while at work, but that was to obey the rules. Now, I wear them every day and I'm sure most people don't even notice

TreyAz

JayZeus wrote: »

It's not 'borderline discrimination' to decide that a middle aged man turning up in the office with his ear pierced is odd behaviour. It's not 'borderline discrimination' to keep an employee who has, by their own choice, 'modified' their body in a way that makes their appearance objectionable to others, out of meetings with people who decide where their company will spend their money.
.

Do you think such "odd behaviour" indicates they are less capable at their job, or just appear so ? Do you discriminate on other criteria also ?

eeguy

TreyAz wrote: »

Do you think such "odd behaviour" indicates they are less capable at their job, or just appear so ? Do you discriminate on other criteria also ?

If you're meeting clients you need to make a good first impression.
Even more so if people are trusting you with their savings and livelihoods.

The OP is no less capable than anyone else presumably. But clients don't know that. They may make a snap judgement based on a first impression that this guy isn't serious, and that could hurt the company.

You could say the same about a guy who has tattoos or paints his nails. We've come a long way as a society in accepting people's personal choice's, but if there's just an outside chance the OP's appearance could cause the company to lose an account or client, then I can understand his bosses position. His boss may have no personal problem with piercings. JayZeus might not have a personal issue with them either, but if it could lose the company money then take them out or move somewhere more accepting.

triggermortis wrote: »

I work in engineering and have several piercings in both ears and have never had any problems with being taken seriously. I got the first 2 many years ago when I was in the military, so obviously I had to remove/hide them while at work, but that was to obey the rules. Now, I wear them every day and I'm sure most people don't even notice

I'm the same. Lads wear shorts and tank tops to work. Long hair, tattoos, piercings etc.
But the sales and marketing lads are all expensive suits, high class watches and groomed to American Psycho standards. It's a different game.

I've no problem at all with anyone getting any bit of themselves pierced, cut, tattooed, implanted with whatever. Your body, your decision, so do what you like, as long as you accept that there ARE consequences.

It's up to me to decide whether or not I'll choose to overlook or react to your decision. It's always a decision to get a piercing, wear a particular item of clothing, get your hair cut a certain way etc.

If I think it makes you look unprofessional, or that it brings your judgement into question in my own opinion, then it's up to me to discriminate against you if I wish to. If I'm advocating for a customer then I'm equally within my rights to express reservation if I believe your decision to 'whatever' may introduce an element of doubt or uncertainty.

No point trying to change my mind on this or try to prove or show how wrong I am. It's all down to the individual to decide, both in terms of whether you stick stuff into your face and how you react to people who do.

judeboy101

One for everyone in the audience wrote: »

I'm a middle aged fella working in finance in a fairly well to do aircraft leasing firm in Dublin. I've always wanted an ear piercing but put it off over work fears. Decided to do it (completely sober I might add) last Saturday.

I went in this morning and i'd people looking at my ear whilst talking to me all day. Eventually it was brought up during lunch and we had a laugh. But I've a meeting with the boss tomorrow afternoon and he hasn't said why, it was a very out of the blue request for a chat.

There's nothing in the employee handbook to say piercings are forbidden, in fact I think one is allowed. I only got a small sized black ball. I'm only in this place about 4 months and have been getting on with all the lads in the office, and I think I'm doing an alright job. Just wondering if anyone has an experience trying something mildly outlandish with their appearance and getting told off by the boss?

I wore long hair when I worked in a garage before and was asked to shave it off by the boss once day, had no problem with that as it was a frontline services job and for hygienic reasons. But I'd be really disappointed if I was asked to remove my ear ring just because it was a bit out of the blue.

I'd wonder if you were a female working in a garage would your previous boss have asked to shave her hair off?

Tenigate

judeboy101 wrote: »

I'd wonder if you were a female working in a garage would your previous boss have asked to shave her hair off?

Only if it was dyed blue.

AndrewJRenko

eeguy wrote: »

The OP is no less capable than anyone else presumably. But clients don't know that. They may make a snap judgement based on a first impression that this guy isn't serious, and that could hurt the company.

They may make a snap judgement that the expensive suits and high class watches indicate that the sales guys are overpaid, so they will choose not to do business there.

Or they may make a snap judgement that the expensive suits and high class watches indicate that the sales guys are gob****es who fall for glossy advertising, so they will choose not to do business there.

People make snap judgements for all kinds of reasons.

eeguy

AndrewJRenko wrote: »

They may make a snap judgement that the expensive suits and high class watches indicate that the sales guys are overpaid, so they will choose not to do business there.

Or they may make a snap judgement that the expensive suits and high class watches indicate that the sales guys are gob****es who fall for glossy advertising, so they will choose not to do business there.

People make snap judgements for all kinds of reasons.

Or they make the judgement the lads are paid well because they're worth it and they present themselves well because they take the job seriously.

Balance of probabilities, but I don't see any of our sales and marketing lads with piercings and tattoos. And they do very well for themselves.

NutmegGirl

Just because you can't see them doesn't mean they don't have any piercings or tattoos!!
People are assuming that everyone has the same standards/bias/thoughts as themselves, for as many people who would make a snap judgement about a piercing or tattoo, plenty wouldn't and are more open minded.
By excluding someone who might have a slightly different look from the conventional might actually damage a company, some people might like to see a more modern inclusive workforce in a company that they are going to work with.
The point is you can't anticipate what people think by looking at them, you're just projecting your own standards onto them.

NutmegGirl

NutmegGirl wrote: »

Just because you can't see them doesn't mean they don't have any piercings or tattoos!!
People are assuming that everyone has the same standards/bias/thoughts as themselves, for as many people who would make a snap judgement about a piercing or tattoo, plenty wouldn't and are more open minded.
By excluding someone who might have a slightly different look from the conventional might actually damage a company, some people might like to see a more modern inclusive workforce in a company that they are going to work with.
The point is you can't anticipate what people think by looking at them, you're just projecting your own standards onto them.

If they can't be seen, there's absolutely nothing to discuss or be concerned about.

It doesn't matter that some people won't care about piercings. It really doesn't matter one bit if that's the case as it won't impact on anything. So I couldn't care less about those people. It's the ones who do care or find it objectionable that matter. You won't change their minds, just like you won't change mine. So it doesn't matter if you think I'm closed minded or otherwise. Your opinions in that regard have zero impact on anything. They're completely irrelevant.


Most will never express their objections openly, to the weirdo with holes in his head will never know. Most will fluff it, hiding it behind something else, while holding fast the opinion they've formed about the individual concerned if they're pressed to give an opinion. Yeah, looks okay to me, you know, whatever you like yourself, right?

Not really.

So you see, it doesn't matter what you think, unless you form a negative opinion. It's the objection that matters, and in business, it really does matter. If you don't accept that then we're just wasting our time here.

LirW

Would it not be fair if you would just tell that guy that you can't take him seriously because he has old piercing holes in his ear? Wouldn't you want that people tell you why they might not take you seriously or have a lower opinion of you?

Especially if you're the manager of that person, they deserve an honest feedback instead of a "ah yeah, won't include them in project because he had earrings many moons ago" behind their back. This is something I'd consider as even more unprofessional than someone wearing a stud in his ear.

LirW

LirW wrote: »

Would it not be fair if you would just tell that guy that you can't take him seriously because he has old piercing holes in his ear? Wouldn't you want that people tell you why they might not take you seriously or have a lower opinion of you?

Especially if you're the manager of that person, they deserve an honest feedback instead of a "ah yeah, won't include them in project because he had earrings many moons ago" behind their back. This is something I'd consider as even more unprofessional than someone wearing a stud in his ear.

No, why would I? If he asks me, I'll tell him straight out, otherwise he can go through his life blissfully unaware of how some people view him.

The one thing I'll say in his favour is that he at least doesn't wear ear studs or jewelry now. It's a kind of passive impact it has on him.

If he wore studs or earrings to the office and expected to meet a customer he'd be spared any degree of courtesy.

somefeen

JayZeus wrote: »

No point trying to change my mind on this or try to prove or show how wrong I am. It's all down to the individual to decide, both in terms of whether you stick stuff into your face and how you react to people who do.

I'm really curious what it is that you do for a living?

somefeen

somefeen wrote: »

I'm really curious what it is that you do for a living?

I'm not even mildly curious what you do for a living to be honest. Do you have something to contribute to the thread, about the subject matter?

AndrewJRenko

JayZeus wrote: »

If they can't be seen, there's absolutely nothing to discuss or be concerned about.

It doesn't matter that some people won't care about piercings. It really doesn't matter one bit if that's the case as it won't impact on anything. So I couldn't care less about those people. It's the ones who do care or find it objectionable that matter. You won't change their minds, just like you won't change mine.

Can I presume that you wouldn't have any people with disabilities in the workplace, right? Some people find all those crutches and guide dogs so objectionable.

And no black people at all? We can't have any of our racist customers having to see something they find objectionable, so we'd never put any black people out in a public place, right?

And definitely no Muslims, with their funny scarfs and never having a pint - we couldn't have them out in front of customers, in case they find them objectionable.

And the gays - oh god the gays with their skinny trousers and pointy shoes and all that? We couldn't risk any objection from our homophobic, racist customers, so let's not put any of them out there.

In fact, we'll just make sure the entire organisation is made up of middle-aged white men who agree about everything themselves, and never have the trauma of facing up to a new opinion that they haven't heard in the golf club, right?

Yeah, to hell with that diversity nonsense - let's go for complete and utter groupthink 1970s style. What could possibly go wrong?