Protecting the farm from Divorce.

Doltanian

Bit of an unusual one here folks but one that has started to worry myself alot more recently; and its something that would on the mind of many a younger farmer.

Basically I'm set to inherit the family farm and some housing property within the coming year or two. I am in a relationship and currently not cohabiting. However this will be the next step for us possibly leading to marriage eventually and children etc.

However I am by my very nature a distrusting cynic and I would never trust any woman fully no matter how much I love her. This land has been in our family since before the famine and I for certain won't relinguish it to some golddigging woman with the liberal legal system behind her.

The law and all family courts are entirely against all men. I know a man who did absolutely nothing wrong other than catch his wife in bed with another man, divorce followed and he had to get a mortgage for half the celtic tiger value of his own family home to pay off his wife. This man did nothing wrong. This cost him dearly.

I have already made a decision not to marry because I cannot trust any woman. My father is considering delaying the transfer until his death which will unfortunately probably come within the next 20 years. He himself did not inherit until the death of his mother when he was aged 56 and he had been married 25 years already then, my own mother is an ultra devout Catholic and rejects all feminism and was very much against Divorce. These trustworthy type of women just don't exist in Ireland anymore.

I had the discussion with a few friends of mine about the same topic recently and we were comparing similar cases basically pubtalk, one lad he knew apparently got wind of his wife's plan to clean him out and himself and his close neighbor and friend discussed it, the two of them agreed to abolish the right of way access into the land through the neighbours place. Basically the farm became like an island with no access and unsellable. The grabbing wife took a share of his savings but couldn't take the farm as it couldn't be sold. Once things were to be sorted they would make a new right of way in through another field.

Another fellow was just honest enough to tell me the reason he never married was the exact same story. He got his GF pregnant and had his son with her and basically had his heir to pass it onto the next generation. As expected the relationship broke down but she couldn't get his land as there was no marriage. She has custody and he got the child support bill but his son spends almost more time with him and that lad will eventually inherit from his father.

Yes it is a controversial topic but one that needs to be addressed, and from my point of view there needs to be legal watertight agreements, and for me to marry I would only marry if it were agreed in the event of marriage breakdown that.

• All assets and property of each partner will remain theirs in the event of divorce.
• The wifes name shall go on no title or deeds to any piece of property she did not contribute financially to.
• We exit from the relationship as we entered it.
• At no time in the relationship shall there be joint bank accounts.
• Whats yours is yours, whats mine is mine.
• I will be responsible for the upkeep of any children until they reach 18 years of age.
• I will not be responsible for the upkeep of my wife after the marriage ends.

Discuss lads.

Arrow in the Knee

As a poster in a different thread said to me

"Well the usual thing is the man walks to the alter owning 100% signs on the dotted line walks back down with 50%".

You think by now there would be Pre-Nuptial Agreements in Ireland.

riffmongous

You need to find a woman with more land and richer than you

Stopitwillya

Personally I prefer the swinging scene. I have been lucky enough to pull some crackers, often being with two at a time. No need for pre nuptial agreements, just work away. And the quality had really improved over the last few years. A few years ago lots of old women but nowadays they be a lot younger and lots of foreigners. Very fond of the foreigners myself. Of course you have to be very wary of the stis. I have been lucky so far. And of course the way modern society had gone you have to be also wary of the women wearing Lycra pants. Nothing against them but they are everywhere. And they are worse than the country women. Tell them you are a farmer and they be all over you like a rash. And looking to sell an acre here or there so they can add to there wardrobe. But at least there is no commitment and no one looking to take your farm. So for you I would recommend them. As for the nearest party just look up swinging Ireland on the internet and it's easy to find from there.
Best of luck op. Thread carefully as no one wants a cruel divorce and half the farm taken from them.

James 007

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk-03oFgvyQ

The part time boy

Doltanian wrote: »

I for certain won't relinguish it to some golddigging woman with the liberal legal system behind her.


These trustworthy type of women just don't exist in Ireland anymore.

.

I dunno are you been serious or is it a attempt at trolling

With the attuide I think your better off doing your gf a favour and don't marry or live together . No marriage won't protect you from " a gold digger " btw ,all she has to do is live with ya .

You can live your life in fear . Live alone and make sure you never lose the land . Trust no one man or women buy a gun and spend all your time on farm and local pub .

Or you can live your life . Make a family create legacy , enjoy life.

If you don't trust people , people will react negatively towards you . And repeat

Yes ireland laws need to change a bit when it comes to family law and protecting family farms .

You can't really change that . You can decide what kind of live you want though

irishgeo

Doltanian wrote: »

Bit of an unusual one here folks but one that has started to worry myself alot more recently; and its something that would on the mind of many a younger farmer.

Basically I'm set to inherit the family farm and some housing property within the coming year or two. I am in a relationship and currently not cohabiting. However this will be the next step for us possibly leading to marriage eventually and children etc.

However I am by my very nature a distrusting cynic and I would never trust any woman fully no matter how much I love her. This land has been in our family since before the famine and I for certain won't relinguish it to some golddigging woman with the liberal legal system behind her.

The law and all family courts are entirely against all men. I know a man who did absolutely nothing wrong other than catch his wife in bed with another man, divorce followed and he had to get a mortgage for half the celtic tiger value of his own family home to pay off his wife. This man did nothing wrong. This cost him dearly.

I have already made a decision not to marry because I cannot trust any woman. My father is considering delaying the transfer until his death which will unfortunately probably come within the next 20 years. He himself did not inherit until the death of his mother when he was aged 56 and he had been married 25 years already then, my own mother is an ultra devout Catholic and rejects all feminism and was very much against Divorce. These trustworthy type of women just don't exist in Ireland anymore.

I had the discussion with a few friends of mine about the same topic recently and we were comparing similar cases basically pubtalk, one lad he knew apparently got wind of his wife's plan to clean him out and himself and his close neighbor and friend discussed it, the two of them agreed to abolish the right of way access into the land through the neighbours place. Basically the farm became like an island with no access and unsellable. The grabbing wife took a share of his savings but couldn't take the farm as it couldn't be sold. Once things were to be sorted they would make a new right of way in through another field.

Another fellow was just honest enough to tell me the reason he never married was the exact same story. He got his GF pregnant and had his son with her and basically had his heir to pass it onto the next generation. As expected the relationship broke down but she couldn't get his land as there was no marriage. She has custody and he got the child support bill but his son spends almost more time with him and that lad will eventually inherit from his father.

Yes it is a controversial topic but one that needs to be addressed, and from my point of view there needs to be legal watertight agreements, and for me to marry I would only marry if it were agreed in the event of marriage breakdown that.

• All assets and property of each partner will remain theirs in the event of divorce.
• The wifes name shall go on no title or deeds to any piece of property she did not contribute financially to.
• We exit from the relationship as we entered it.
• At no time in the relationship shall there be joint bank accounts.
• Whats yours is yours, whats mine is mine.
• I will be responsible for the upkeep of any children until they reach 18 years of age.
• I will not be responsible for the upkeep of my wife after the marriage ends.

Discuss lads.

She wouldn't be your wife if the marriage ends.

Dickie10

are you saying OP cant live his life fully, have a great time, travel the world etc without getting married?? surely he can do all these things and even more as well as build a legacy without being married or having children

bcklschaps

OP, your farm is no different to any business, the way its treated in a divorce scenario.

From my understanding a divorced partner is only entitled to assets from a business if they have contributed to the value of that business. So, in your case, if for example your partner worked with you, day in day out on the farm...then quite rightly she would be entitled to be rewarded for that work if ye divorced. If she never even stood in a gap...well then a polite smack on the derri?re and 'on your way darlin'. Family home is a bit different and where there's kids etc. things are more complicated too. It seems to come down to the richer partner paying "compensation" to the poorer partner.

I suppose, if you are thinking of marrying somebody, make sure they have about as much assets (or more) than you do, is the simple advice. :-/

Limestone Cowboy

I know a few middle aged lads that thought like yourself, big farms and afraid a woman would run off with all they had if they married her, no heir to leave it to either. I'd be more of the nothing ventured nothing gained mentality and this is coming from someone whose parents spilt up when I was younger and my mother went looking for her cut in court.

SmartinMartin

you wouldn't look after your own children once they reach the age of 18.

You deserve to die a sad old bachelor.

whelan2

These women seem awful yolks altogether. You cant take the farm to the grave with you.

leg wax

the land the land......jesus christ stay with it you deserve yourself.

dudara

With all due respect, you'd be far better off developing a bit of respect for women and trust in relationships, rather than shouting "the land!" Otherwise there's a severe possibility you will be a lonely old bachelor.

If you want to understand all options, go talk to a solicitor.

_Brian

My advice is stay single and leave the women of the country to men that know how to treat and respect them.

I'm not saying that there aren't difficult women just the same as there are difficult men, but your attitude towards all women is just lousy, I'm not sure where you get it from but it really is letting you down and any self respecting woman would stay well clear.

My understanding at moment is that there is no facility in Ireland for pre-nup agreements.

I hope you and your inheritance have a great life but with an attitude like that it would seem it's all you will ever have !!

I said

I'd say you must be an expert at pulling the stomach off yourself.
The fair deal will get it all when you sad and lonely in the county home.

Teyla Emmagan

I hope you've told your girlfriend you're never marrying (because she's an untrustworthy gold digging ho).

Honestly with your attitude you'd be better off staying single. I mean then there would be no heir for your precious farm, but at least there'd be no chance any conniving untrustworthy woman could take a single blade of grass off you either.

Iseedeadpixels

Ok he could have worded it better but go easy on him he's talking about land thats been in his family for 200 years!

eviltwin

What a sad way to be, always expecting the worst of people.

Of course you don't have to get married, you can still have a full relationship with doing the legal bit but then after a few years cohabitation rights kick in.

It's also a bit disrespectful to say a woman, or man, who isn't contributing financially to your farm isn't deserving of it. Is her own salary or the time spent at home raising your "heir" not a valid and necessary contribution?

Anyway, maybe you should tell your partner how little you think of her and talk through your options with a solicitor and probably a therapist. Your original thread title before the edit shows you have major issues with women.

_Brian

Iseedeadpixels wrote: »

Ok he could have worded it better but go easy on him he's talking about land thats been in his family for 200 years!

OP is putting a square of land over his own happiness and well above respect for all women.
Any person thinking like this is never going to have any sort of relationship with any woman above his mother. It's the person behaving like this that would split a marriage

This type of person is shallow, selfish and in truth is capable of loving no one only themselves.

Big Bag of Chips

Do you even like your gf? I'm curious as to why you're going out with someone if you think so little of her or what she might potentially do to your livelihood? Why bother being in a relationship at all if that's how you feel? No relationship is guaranteed. The strongest relationship will have problems. But it's up to you as a couple to work together. Nobody goes into a relationship with the intention of ending it and taking half of everything. And if that's what you honestly believe your gf has planned, then the only thing to do is end your relationship now. Not move in together.

Have you spoken to your gf about your plans for your (plural) future? You say moving in together is the next step, but I'd assume if she read your post and knew your true feelings, moving in together wouldn't be an option for her. Not because she's a golddigger, but purely because you think so little of her.

Of course you want to protect your (inherited) assets, but your language and attitude needs a bit of refining! I think you need to stay single. It is the only way you can guarantee that everything will stay solely yours. Cohabitation could well afford her rights after a certain length of time. Having a child with you will definitely afford her rights after a shorter length of time.

Courts in Ireland have a "no blame" policy when it comes to divorce/separation. Luckily for you, because it's your attitude that could very well be the undoing of a potentially good relationship. I know, I'd definitely find it very difficult to share my life with someone who looked at me through your eyes.

xl500

You cant pick and choose which laws you like and which you dont and if you dont like the Laws here you are free to move to another Country

As You said you have a view to marrying and having Children thats it all there

http://www.historyhome.co.uk/c-eight/ireland/ire-land.htm

You must have been a very priviliged family to own Land Before The Famine as 97% of land in Ireland was owned by Landlords

I see your OP was last Edited by "Genghis Cant" Cant being the operative word

machiavellianme

Your worried about some gold digger when you haven't exactly worked hard to build up your empire yourself? How is her situation any different to yours, inheriting the land?
Yes it mightve been in your family for a while, but it won't be for much longer if you don't learn to trust people, otherwise the old procreation is more difficult.

2012paddy2012

If the post is true I don't believe so..its the woman I would feel sorry for genuinely​

Varik

White knights out in force

mitresize5

your going to make your nephew, who will probably have gone away to college and be working in a city very rich ... the flucky ducker

Have a look around at your neighbours and if any of them have kids they're the ones who will eventually own your land as thats who your nephews/nieces will probably sell too

kowtow

There's a simple solution here.

Establish a trust with clear purposes for the benefit of your future farming descendants, and gift the farm to it, irrevocably.

Farm it yourself as a lifetime tenant of the trust.

And don't allow your own hang ups to make a bad farm and a worse marriage.

The part time boy

Dickie10 wrote: »

are you saying OP cant live his life fully, have a great time, travel the world etc without getting married?? surely he can do all these things and even more as well as build a legacy without being married or having children

I presume that was to my comment

No i was saying that . I was saying he won't live his life fully if he does not trust anyone man or women .

Of course a future wife would leave a man with that attitude to women over time .

I would not want my sister / daughter to marry a man with them old fashioned view of women

jaymla627

mitresize5 wrote: »

your going to make your nephew, who will probably have gone away to college and be working in a city very rich ... the flucky ducker

Have a look around at your neighbours and if any of them have kids they're the ones who will eventually own your land as thats who your nephews/nieces will probably sell too

Well over 1500 acres within half a mile of us been farmed by middle-aged bachelors/elderly people with it rented out/still trying to farm it, in all cases nearly guaranteed no one coming along with the family name to farm it

kowtow

jaymla627 wrote:

Well over 1500 acres within half a mile of us been farmed by middle-aged bachelors/elderly people with it rented out/still trying to farm it, in all cases nearly guaranteed no one coming along with the family name to farm it

On the plus side, they won't be short of people to drive them to mass, make tea, and walk their dogs as the years go by.

_Brian

Its like the story of a fell who wants to kick his special needs brother out of the home house because the parents wanted to make a provision to let him live out the rest of his life in it, the lad reckoned the home house was too valuable for this to happen. wanted the fella to be put out on his own and get a house from his SW payment or maybe a free house from the state.. Just so he could have the place for himself (but never for any golddigger woman)

Its funny how a picture builds from words.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=103540668

livedadream

is this even real life?
if your family has had the same land since before the famine can we read into it that you took if off some Irish people?
get a grip of yourself.

The part time boy

_Brian wrote: »

Its like the story of a fell who wants to kick his special needs brother out of the home house because the parents wanted to make a provision to let him live out the rest of his life in it, the lad reckoned the home house was too valuable for this to happen. wanted the fella to be put out on his own and get a house from his SW payment or maybe a free house from the state.. Just so he could have the place for himself (but never for any golddigger woman)

Its funny how a picture builds from words.

Not sure what happened to the link you put up . But wow !!!

His basically stopping give his disabled brother a right of resistance In the home house . The op is going to need to sort a house for himself anyway as his parents live In it .

I want to find his gf to tell her run !!!

Cattlepen

Doltanian wrote: »

Bit of an unusual one here folks but one that has started to worry myself alot more recently; and its something that would on the mind of many a younger farmer.

Basically I'm set to inherit the family farm and some housing property within the coming year or two. I am in a relationship and currently not cohabiting. However this will be the next step for us possibly leading to marriage eventually and children etc.

However I am by my very nature a distrusting cynic and I would never trust any woman fully no matter how much I love her. This land has been in our family since before the famine and I for certain won't relinguish it to some golddigging woman with the liberal legal system behind her.

The law and all family courts are entirely against all men. I know a man who did absolutely nothing wrong other than catch his wife in bed with another man, divorce followed and he had to get a mortgage for half the celtic tiger value of his own family home to pay off his wife. This man did nothing wrong. This cost him dearly.

I have already made a decision not to marry because I cannot trust any woman. My father is considering delaying the transfer until his death which will unfortunately probably come within the next 20 years. He himself did not inherit until the death of his mother when he was aged 56 and he had been married 25 years already then, my own mother is an ultra devout Catholic and rejects all feminism and was very much against Divorce. These trustworthy type of women just don't exist in Ireland anymore.

I had the discussion with a few friends of mine about the same topic recently and we were comparing similar cases basically pubtalk, one lad he knew apparently got wind of his wife's plan to clean him out and himself and his close neighbor and friend discussed it, the two of them agreed to abolish the right of way access into the land through the neighbours place. Basically the farm became like an island with no access and unsellable. The grabbing wife took a share of his savings but couldn't take the farm as it couldn't be sold. Once things were to be sorted they would make a new right of way in through another field.

Another fellow was just honest enough to tell me the reason he never married was the exact same story. He got his GF pregnant and had his son with her and basically had his heir to pass it onto the next generation. As expected the relationship broke down but she couldn't get his land as there was no marriage. She has custody and he got the child support bill but his son spends almost more time with him and that lad will eventually inherit from his father.

Yes it is a controversial topic but one that needs to be addressed, and from my point of view there needs to be legal watertight agreements, and for me to marry I would only marry if it were agreed in the event of marriage breakdown that.

• All assets and property of each partner will remain theirs in the event of divorce.
• The wifes name shall go on no title or deeds to any piece of property she did not contribute financially to.
• We exit from the relationship as we entered it.
• At no time in the relationship shall there be joint bank accounts.
• Whats yours is yours, whats mine is mine.
• I will be responsible for the upkeep of any children until they reach 18 years of age.
• I will not be responsible for the upkeep of my wife after the marriage ends.

Discuss lads.

How did they own land before the famine?? I thought the landlords owned it all?

rangler1

Too many wives were subject to a tyrants bullying in the past and couldn't leave for fear of poverty, time it was tightened up.......of course they should be looked after,
As an aside I tell my OH that I'll give her half the farm if she gives me half her pension, only fair ain't it

MayoAreMagic

If you can never trust any woman, then how do you expect any woman to trust you? It is this attitude that will ultimately be to blame if your family farm does get split up, not a woman.

You say you are a distrusting cynic by nature, has the thought not crossed your mind that your father is in fact delaying to give the farm to someone else?

Bullocks

whelan2 wrote: »

These women seem awful yolks altogether. You cant take the farm to the grave with you.

As the ould lad said when a local was getting divorced and she wanted half the farm " he should put right misery on her and give her the full farm " haha
OP I think you're off you're nut to be that worried about a farm . The generation's gone before you won't keep you warm at night

Bandana boy

I would love it if one of these Gold Digging Women Flew in and swept the OPs Father of his feet and the farm ends up with her and her fancy city ways .

whelan2

Anyone else think the op is a troll?

croot

Doltanian wrote: »

Yes it is a controversial topic but one that needs to be addressed, and from my point of view there needs to be legal watertight agreements, and for me to marry I would only marry if it were agreed in the event of marriage breakdown that.

Discuss lads.

You are a ****. Discussion over

Read the problem pages on the back of the farmers journal most weeks and you will see a woman who has lived with a tyrant all her life and raised the kids and now wants out after years of bullying or just neglect and selfish behaviour. But she was a money grabbing hoe obviously......

croot

whelan2 wrote: »

Anyone else think the op is a troll?

Possibly not. He has form it seems with trying to evict a brother with special needs. Maybe he really is that big of a ****.

Mod note: We'll have less of the bad language, thank you.

freedominacup

Iseedeadpixels wrote: »

Ok he could have worded it better but go easy on him he's talking about land thats been in his family for 200 years!

He hasn't gotten half what's coming to him yet.

freedominacup

Cattlepen wrote: »

How did they own land before the famine?? I thought the landlords owned it all?

My family were certainly landowners during/before the famine. Couldn't have a more Irish surname or a more Catholic family. There's an endless amount of revison and denial in the stories we have been fed about Ireland in the nineteenth century.

patsy_mccabe

freedominacup wrote: »

My family were certainly landowners during/before the famine. Couldn't have a more Irish surname or a more Catholic family. There's an endless amount of revison and denial in the stories we have been fed about Ireland in the nineteenth century.

Have you checked this on Griffiths Valuation of circa 1847. All our area was owned by one big landlord with tenant farmers renting small holdings. A lot of the present family names still match those back then on the same holdings.

Balf

whelan2 wrote: »

Anyone else think the op is a troll?

Truth is actually stranger than fiction. This is an issue that our Guberment actually entertained for a while.

https://www.ifa.ie/commitment-to-look-at-legal-status-of-pre-nuptial-agreements-welcome-downey/#.WS6hePkrLct

Speaking after a meeting with the Minister for Justice Frances Fitzgerald, IFA President Eddie Downey said he welcomed the Minister’s commitment to look more closely at the proposal to provide greater certainty to the legal status of pre-nuptial agreements.

Mr Downey said, “The uncertainty surrounding the legal recognition of pre-nuptial agreements, in the event of marriage breakdown, is a real issue which is impacting negatively on the timely lifetime transfer of the family farm”.

Thoughtfully, I notice they included a pregnant woman in the photograph accompanying that article.

Unfortunately, reality just couldn't be squared with the IFA's demands

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/politics/prenuptial-law-ditched-due-to-legal-problems-34833926.html

A new law to recognise pre-nuptial agreements for marrying couples has been quietly ditched by the Government, the Sunday Independent has learned.<...>

Introducing new legislation would raise "legal, public policy" and possibly "constitutional" problems, according to a Department of Justice spokeswoman.<...>

Annette Sheehan, a family law solicitor in Cork, <...> suggested, in some instances, this has resulted in some couples living together rather than getting married.

I think folk don't quite appreciate just how brutally materialist farming culture is. There's a mistaken picture of rural life being all about happy yokels, like the Hobbits in LoTR.

pedigree 6

Op you should go on to the Joe Duffy Show and explain the current predicament that you currently find yourself in.

Oh wait maybe you already have...:p

Failing that have you considered adopting an adult male successor to the throne.
It's one way of keeping the family name going.
Popular in Japan I hear with the big corporations who want to keep the money together and keep the family name going.:D

Edit: You haven't got the throne yet. Apologies.

Cattlepen

freedominacup wrote: »

My family were certainly landowners during/before the famine. Couldn't have a more Irish surname or a more Catholic family. There's an endless amount of revison and denial in the stories we have been fed about Ireland in the nineteenth century.

Well they musta been well in with somebody. The rest of us were in hovels and ditches
Can I ask what part of the country your in?

Freddio

Simple solution, show your partner this thread, and if she runs a mile you know she is not a witch

dunleakelleher

Doltanian wrote: »

However I am by my very nature a distrusting cynic and I would never trust any woman fully no matter how much I love her. This land has been in our family since before the famine and I for certain won't relinguish it to some golddigging woman with the liberal legal system behind her.

Only advice I can give is drop the current "golddigging woman" as you have described her(she will love that title) and find a person you love and are willing to "share" the rest of your life with.

pedigree 6

dunleakelleher wrote: »

Only advice I can give is drop the current "golddigging woman" as you have described her(she will love that title) and find a person you love and are willing to "share" the rest of your life with.

Awwwwwww. :D

The part time boy

Cattlepen wrote: »

freedominacup wrote: »

My family were certainly landowners during/before the famine. Couldn't have a more Irish surname or a more Catholic family. There's an endless amount of revison and denial in the stories we have been fed about Ireland in the nineteenth century.

Well they musta been well in with somebody. The rest of us were in hovels and ditches
Can I ask what part of the country your in?

My family got land trangetes to them during the famine. And also are rc.

As far as I can see he was working for the land lord and married his sister in law . I don't think the landowner wanted his brother law working for him so gave him a large enough farm