Is it bad manners to shorten someone's name?

pilly

I'm just wondering if people consider it bad manners to shorten someone's name if you can't pronounce it?

I have to do it sometimes because our employees are from other countries and I simply can not pronounce their names but feel rude not to use their name when I say hello?

9or10

No Pill its grand

uch

Yes

January

Yes it's rude unless you are asked by that person to shorten it.

BENDYBINN

9or10 wrote: »

No Pill its grand

No one would have thought of that only you

Ted111

pilly wrote: »

from other countries and I simply can not pronounce their names

Jocular slap on the back....
How's she cuttin, horsebox, have you that spreadsheet for me?

seamus

Yes, it is rude to modify anyone's name in any way without them asking or telling you to.

This includes shortening it, modifying the pronunciation, or interpreting it into a different language.

If you're unsure of how to pronounce it or would like to use a shorter version, ask first. Say, "I'm sorry but I don't know how to pronounce your name." Most people will then tell you how, or give you a different name to use.

HensVassal

I lengthen peoples' names.

My friend Phil I call Phillibuster. My barman Max I call Maximus, Maxwell, Maximillian, etc. My mate Tom I call Tomazceski (after the great Polish goalie).

pilly

seamus wrote: »

Yes, it is rude to modify anyone's name in any way without them asking or telling you to.

This includes shortening it, modifying the pronunciation, or interpreting it into a different language.

If you're unsure of how to pronounce it or would like to use a shorter version, ask first. Say, "I'm sorry but I don't know how to pronounce your name." Most people will then tell you how, or give you a different name to use.

Some have said "just call me Zibby or whatever". Some don't though and actually don't have enough English to understand when I say I can't pronounce your name so it's fairly awkward.

The_Valeyard

Depends if it's funny.

pilly

Ted111 wrote: »

Jocular slap on the back....
How's she cuttin, horsebox, have you that spreadsheet for me?

How's she cuttin horsebox could be quite confusing for some!!!

Ted111

Some Chinese people adapt an English name that bears no connection
to their native, given name.

My name is Li Wei, but Paul is my english name

The chinese are great people to paraphrase somebody.


We can have chinese names too Get a chinese name

pilly

Ted111 wrote: »

Some Chinese people adapt an English name that bears no connection
to their native, given name.

My name is Li Wei, but Paul is my english name

The chinese are great people to paraphrase somebody.


We can have chinese names too Get a chinese name

Yeah, some of them here are called Paddy too but I think they've just decided that's their Irish name!

pilly

Ted111 wrote: »

Some Chinese people adapt an English name that bears no connection
to their native, given name.

My name is Li Wei, but Paul is my english name

The chinese are great people to paraphrase somebody.


We can have chinese names too Get a chinese name

My Chinese name is Binling Deng!! I don't like it!

Alun

There's a guy who works in my local Aldi, who by his accent and looks is clearly not Irish, although I can't quite place where he's from. He does bear a striking resemblance to Dale Winton though, even down to the orange fake tan, and proudly wears an Aldi name tag with "Dale" written on it. I must ask him his real name one day

Olishi4

I personally wouldn't mind but usually go by the name they tell me. If I can't pronounce it, I just ask them to clarify it.

I did once work in a receptionist role when I was about 18. One of my colleagues and I were always joking and winding each other up, we got on really well though. One day I told him "I'm bored, I think I might change your name today" and he said "what? ye can't do that" and said "i am, why can't I?".

I only did it a few times but when someone called the office and asked for him, theyd say "can I speak to colm smith please", I'd say "ohhhh eh ye sure...you mean colm smithy?" and the caller would say "em eh ye?"

He sat at a desk directly across from me so when he'd hear me do it, he'd give me a "you little bitch" look!

Ted111

pilly wrote: »

My Chinese name is Binling Deng!! I don't like it!

It's not so bad, Paul.

The flying mouse

:mad: There's folk on here who keep calling me mouse :mad:

bbari

My name is Bilal. My colleagues call me Bill, Billy, Billy Bob, Billy Bob Thornton, Billiam, William! They don't mean to offend me so I am not offended at all. Few colleagues did ask me if I mind when they call me with those names and I said I don't!

pilly

Ted111 wrote: »

It's not so bad, Paul.

It sounds dirty. You're close but my real name is Paula!

The flying mouse

bbari wrote: »

My name is Bilal. My colleagues call me Bill, Billy, Billy Bob, Billy Bob Thornton, Billiam, William! They don't mean to offend me so I am not offended at all. Few colleagues did ask me if I mind when they call me with those names and I said I don't!

Why didn't you just sing

You can call me Al

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

It depends. My name has 3 shorter versions that people call me. People I'd talk to a good bit will call me one of the shorter versions. One is more "intimate" in that only my parents ever shortened it down to, or people now I'm incredibly close to. If someone I'm not close to calls me it it would actually make me wince because the last person to use a lot was my dad and I don't like hearing it anymore. I actually stopped going to a hairdresser because she always shortened my name down to it. On the other side I don't like people calling me by my first name if they know me because the full thing is very "you're in trouble now" and it makes me uneasy.


TL:DR

I don't care what I'm called as long as it's not too early in the morning

midnight city

Yeah my boss shortened my name to dick one time. I'm not even called Richard though..

osarusan

Yes, it is.

Especially if they don't like it but you continue to do it.

It always annoys me when English speakers (and, infuriatingly, English language teachers) unilaterally decide to give a foreign person, such as a Chinese student, an English name, just because they can't be bothered pronouncing their actual name.

pilly

osarusan wrote: »

Yes, it is.

Especially if they don't like it but you continue to do it.

It always annoys me when English speakers (and, infuriatingly, English language teachers) unilaterally decide to give a foreign person, such as a Chinese student, an English name, just because they can't be bothered pronouncing their actual name.

It's honestly not just a case of not being bothered. It is genuinely a case of not being able to. And it's not just me. Plenty of people have the same problem. If I can pronounce a name I will use it no problem.

Herb Powell

Yeah. Pure fucckin laziness.

Gen.Zhukov

midnight city wrote: »

Yeah my boss shortened my name to dick one time. I'm not even called Richard though..

Got a genuine business fax from a guy in England years ago

".................
Yours Faithfully,

Richard Brain"

DEFTLEFTHAND

It's disrespectful not to learn somebodies name, especially if you're working with them. Ask them the pronunciation if unsure.

RGDATA!

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

It's disrespectful not to learn somebodies name, especially if you're working with them. Ask them the pronunciation if unsure.

He already explained that he simply can't do that.

pilly

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

It's disrespectful not to learn somebodies name, especially if you're working with them. Ask them the pronunciation if unsure.

So can you pronounce every foreign name once someone tells you how it's pronounced. I have already explained there are words that I simply can not pronounce.

Bear in mind now that most of my colleagues don't speak any English, I'm actually the one in the awkward position. Is it disrespectful for them not to speak to me in English?

toptom

Its the height of ignorance unless your close to the person

DEFTLEFTHAND

pilly wrote: »

So can you pronounce every foreign name once someone tells you how it's pronounced. I have already explained there are words that I simply can not pronounce.

Bear in mind now that most of my colleagues don't speak any English, I'm actually the one in the awkward position. Is it disrespectful for them not to speak to me in English?

That's fair enough. I understand that it must be an awkward position to be in.

Hammer89

Alun wrote: »

There's a guy who works in my local Aldi, who by his accent and looks is clearly not Irish, although I can't quite place where he's from. He does bear a striking resemblance to Dale Winton though, even down to the orange fake tan, and proudly wears an Aldi name tag with "Dale" written on it. I must ask him his real name one day

Bill Shankly kept going back to Liverpool training when he retired so it might be similar with Dale.

tupenny

New guy in work is Gareth, I call him Gar. Am I rude? 😯

9or10

1.618 wrote: »

Got a genuine business fax from a guy in England years ago

".................
Yours Faithfully,

Richard Brain"

Years ago, I cashed a Giro for a woman called

Mrs P Enis

I wasn't cool at all. I was nearly in hysterics.:o

Pinch Flat

I worked with a guy called Paul Mycock a few years back. We shortened his name to Tug.

Advbrd

1.618 wrote: »

Got a genuine business fax from a guy in England years ago

".................
Yours Faithfully,

Richard Brain"

Yeah, worked with a Richard Head. He didn't respond to Dick.
Also worked with two brothers called Nick and Mick who also had a brother called Rick.

gw80

Just call them by wherever they are from, because that's not annoying at all,
Eg, if he from England, just say" hey English, what you at"
Or " hey India, india, yea I'm talking to you, come here I want ya"
And so on and so forth,

RobertKK

If your name is Robert, you get called Bob, Rob, Robbie, Bobby, Roberto apart from Robert.
Some are shorter, some are longer.

Lone Stone

Well unless it's a friend or family member it would be rude, depends on your relationship with the person.

WildWater

seamus wrote: »

Yes, it is rude to modify anyone's name in any way without them asking or telling you to.

This includes shortening it, modifying the pronunciation, or interpreting it into a different language.

If you're unsure of how to pronounce it or would like to use a shorter version, ask first. Say, "I'm sorry but I don't know how to pronounce your name." Most people will then tell you how, or give you a different name to use.

I tried to explain to my primary school teacher in the 70's that the gaelic version of my name is not my name. Needless to say all it gained me was slap across the head.

lawlolawl

I don't care what people call me, as long as they don't call me late for supper! Am I right guys?

Thoughts and prayers xxxxx

Ferrari3600

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/That%27s_Not_My_Name

Robsweezie

it can come across a bit forward and over familiar, you're taking a risk in that you dont know if they're comfortable with it. its then awkward if they reject the shortened name and correct you. it may not seem much but it is when you think about it, its someones name. i've done it once or twice and learned from it.

from now on when i meet *louise, shes louise until i properly get to know her and grow closer to her. then she can be lou, if she wants.

i actually think shortened names, nicknames, or altered names can be good. it shows knowledge and affection for the person.

califano

I shorten double barrel names. Like 'Davin-Power', usually addressing the most common part of the double barrel. Cant be having the increasingly popular double barrel names.

uck51js9zml2yt

I used to go into McDonald's in Hong Kong and be served by an Apple

One of my son's has a short name and people in my wife's country lengthen it...I hate it!
We gave him a short name to stop people shortening it.
The other son has a long name and same applies in reverse.

Dravokivich

RobertKK wrote: »

If your name is Robert, you get called Bob, Rob, Robbie, Bobby, Roberto apart from Robert.
Some are shorter, some are longer.

No thanks.

I always had a preference towards Bob because people I was introduced to wouldn't believe it for some odd reason.

Mint Sauce

Half the people I work with are either Indian, Philippinean, Eastern European, etc. Nearly all offer a shortened version, or the English translation to go by.

Saying that, allot of the English/Irish staff gets called by shorten versions as well, although generally by consent.

I have occasionally been called by, or asked if I could be called by the Irish nickname version of my name, one I was never called growing up (in England), and have always either quickly corrected, without caring if caused offence, or politely refused.

pilly

One of the guys is actually called "uncle Johnny" by everyone, I've on idea why but he doesn't seem to mind. It reminds me of "here's Johnny"!

HensVassal

osarusan wrote: »

Yes, it is.

Especially if they don't like it but you continue to do it.

It always annoys me when English speakers (and, infuriatingly, English language teachers) unilaterally decide to give a foreign person, such as a Chinese student, an English name, just because they can't be bothered pronouncing their actual name.

But you have to understand that there are 4 distinct tones in Mandarin. Get it wrong and you could be insulting the Chinese person. For example "Ma" has four different meanings when the tone is applied. One is "mother", but with a slightly elongated tone it becomes "horse".

You could be calling someone's mum an oul mare.

xiao wang (pronounced "see-yoaaw wang") means Little King, very common Chinese name, or xiao li.....Little Dragon. But pronounce xiao wrong and you could be calling the person a foot or something.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kEYGaBxfpMM&sns=em