Scary/Unpleasant Experience...

jamie124

So I am currently going to college once a week in Dublin City and my course ends at 09:30PM so it is dark and getting later into the night by the time i'm on the path on the way to my bus stop.
It takes me 10 minutes to get to my bus stop from my college which isn't the worst I suppose but considering last night was my first night to ever walk ALONE at that hour of the night in Dublin City, it was quite interesting but scary... (Might sound ridiculous but that's how I feel...)

I was stopped by people which I will describe as drug addicts (You could clearly tell) and one of them in particular kept asking me for money and me being silly old me stopped to actually engage with them... (Never again will I ever do that...) It all just happened so fast as they got me on the spot!! I just said "Sorry i've no cash on me" and he said "STOP LIEING TO ME!!!!" and so I just aborted the whole conversation and walked as fast as I could to the bus stop while trying to rush past everyone else in front of me who were walking 1 mile an hour...
I saw all sorts on my way to the bus stop but had to try my best to avoid eye contact.. My heart was literally in my mouth!!...

Has anyone any tips/advice on what to do in certain situations like this?
I genuinely feel at risk and unsafe... Not much you can do though I suppose.. At least there is other people around but still...

Thanks in advance!:eek:

uck51js9zml2yt

jamie124 wrote: »

So I am currently going to college once a week in Dublin City and my course ends at 09:30PM so it is dark and getting later into the night by the time i'm on the path on the way to my bus stop.
It takes me 10 minutes to get to my bus stop from my college which isn't the worst I suppose but considering last night was my first night to ever walk ALONE at that hour of the night in Dublin City, it was quite interesting but scary... (Might sound ridiculous but that's how I feel...)

I was stopped by people which I will describe as drug addicts (You could clearly tell) and one of them in particular kept asking me for money and me being silly old me stopped to actually engage with them... (Never again will I ever do that...) It all just happened so fast as they got me on the spot!! I just said "Sorry i've no cash on me" and he said "STOP LIEING TO ME!!!!" and so I just aborted the whole conversation and walked as fast as I could to the bus stop while trying to rush past everyone else in front of me who were walking 1 mile an hour...
I saw all sorts on my way to the bus stop but had to try my best to avoid eye contact.. My heart was literally in my mouth!!...

Has anyone any tips/advice on what to do in certain situations like this?
I genuinely feel at risk and unsafe... Not much you can do though I suppose.. At least there is other people around but still...

Thanks in advance!:eek:

Welcome to Dublin;)
Don't engage, don't make eye contact. ...cross the road if need be.

Hanley

Look 100m down the road at all times. If there looks like there'll be hassle. Cross the road.

If someone steps in front of you to ask a Q and block your past, step around them and keep walking.

It's the same as any other major city.

whiskeyman

Headphones can be useful.
Don't make eye contact - walk briskly.
What areas are you walking down?

jamie124

whiskeyman wrote: »

Headphones can be useful.
Don't make eye contact - walk briskly.
What areas are you walking down?

I see... I walk down South Great Georges Street and up the Liffey in order to get the bus... It seemed okay on my way to college but coming out of it was quite an experience I must say...

Simply Red

See if anyone else on the course is walking in the same general direction as yourself so you can walk with them?

jamie124

Simply Red wrote: »

See if anyone else on the course is walking in the same general direction as yourself so you can walk with them?

Tried that, The majority of them drive in and out and so they go to the car park... The remainder of us get the bus but it's all different directions unfortunately

January

Did you go via Temple Bar?

jamie124

January wrote: »

Did you go via Temple Bar?

I've no idea... Dame Street??

riffmongous

Also, keep your wits about you even if there are other normal people about, I've heard of people being robbed/hassled at bus stops with plenty of other people around

Spanish Eyes

Can you take a bus on George's Street to somewhere nearer your own bus home? Lots of buses go down George's Street and some cross the river at O'Connell Street.

CantGetNoSleep

whiskeyman wrote: »

Headphones can be useful.
Don't make eye contact - walk briskly.
What areas are you walking down?

Keep the volume down low if you are wearing headphones somewhere you feel insecure though.

You will get used to walking around in a city - once you keep your wits about you, keep valuables away etc. you learn to avoid problems to the greatest extent possible.

If you are in dbs, I'm there on Mondays and Thursdays and ill walk up with you if your nervous

LadyMayBelle

Jee, so sorry to hear that, that's a horrible experience to have. Had a scary few minutes myself on Friday, just general comments and hassle from strangers, couldn't call a Hailo fast enough. I'd take up the offer to walk with someone just till you feel a bit more confident.

Jellybaby1

I was a teenager in the 1970's, same thing used to happen to me when I had to walk home from youth club in the city at 10pm, only it was usually just drunks in those days, less threatening than druggies but still scared the hell out of me. Don't engage in any way, don't stop, avert your eyes, keep walking at a good pace, don't dawdle, don't take out your phone, and if you have earphones in, keep alert to noises around and behind you. If you look like you are on a mission they will lose interest.

SB_Part2

Headphones usually deter them.

Cathmandooo

You'll be fine, you know now to ignore them, keep walking and avoid eye contact. The only people that would have any genuine reason to stop you might be lost tourists but given you don't seem familiar enough with the streets to give directions then just ignore everyone.

I've been living and working in the city centre for the best part of a decade now and never have any hassle walking around.

Wear headphones but I wouldn't have anything playing, it's always better to be able to hear your surroundings. Don't have your phone out either.

If you're going from Georges Street to the Liffey keep to main streets, Dame Street, Westmoreland Street.

If you're approached at the bus stop I find a quick grunt of 'no sorry' at them and look away usually gets rid. Be prepared to walk away if you need to but really it's unlikely for you to need to.

Cathmandooo

Cathmandooo wrote: »

I've been living and working in the city centre for the best part of a decade now and never have any hassle walking around.

Went to school in the city centre, went to university in the city centre, work in the city centre, now live in the city centre so I've been commuting in and out since I was 12 and also never have had hassle. Just keep walking.

Birneybau

Ah jaysus, was probably just a one off.

Head down, keep walking. Thought you were going to say you were mugged or something.

charlie_says

Keep moving in a situation like that.

Don't stop and engage them especially if there is more than one person as they can orient themselves behind or to the side of you where you can't see what they are doing when you speak to another one.

CatInABox

Don't ever give a reason either, I always just say "Sorry, no" as I continue walking.

L1011

A fair few of the beggars have realised that some people will give them something out of guilt if they get challenging like this - there's another who shouts about "not having the decency" to reply to him. The chance of them doing something to you physically is minuscule.

benjamin d

Practice your Resting B!tch Face. Some people have this gentle, passive face that just attracts chuggers, beggars and junkies.
I'm generally given a wide berth because I naturally always look like I'll cut anyone who stops me. It's a very useful trait.

mydarkstar

As Cathmandoo said, wear headphones but don't play anything on them. Having them in will deter a lot of people from talking to you as they'll think you can't hear them, but having no music means you'll be tuned into the sounds around you.

Mostly, just keep your eyes open and see what's ahead of you. Cross the road if you see anything or anyone ahead that might look like it might be trouble/awkward. The less said to junkies the better - "no, sorry" will go better than "i'm sorry, I dont' have anything on me right now" as it just engages with them.

I've been 12 years living in the city centre and walking about it at all hours. However, there is one woman that none of the above works on - she flipping can't stand me and she's usually around near my home. She's followed me down the road on occassion, roaring and shouting that I'm an effin stingy b###h who won't give her anything and who do I think I am. One fun day she screamed how it was just for food and that I effin think it's for fags. I saw her later that day spending her cup of change on a naggin and some Johnny Blue in the corner shop :-)

jamie124

Thanks for all of the tips everyone! They have really helped!.
I was going to suggest to my Dad that he collects me outside my college or near enough to it as it is quite dodgy that time of night and to be brutally honest I would be s""""""g my pants walking to the bus stop at that hour! Now, it wouldn't be so bad if someone was with me... I told a few people about it and they said just keep walking aswell but to maybe get my Dad to collect me at that time of night..

I'll see what happens..
Thanks again - any more tips/advice keep them coming!!
x

Rakish Paddy

Are you male or female? If male, I think the best tactic is to just move with confidence and purpose, head up, looking ahead and walking at a fair pace. Just walk on by anyone trying to stop you and don't even look their way or say anything more than a 'sorry' if you really want to be polite. I'm quite average in terms of height and build, but in years and years of walking in Dublin at all hours of day and night, and in plenty of 'dodgy' areas, I don't think I've ever really felt unsafe and had very few serious attempts to stop me in my tracks, and I expect it's probably because I don't look like an easy or worthwhile target.

I'm not sure if this holds true for women as well, but I imagine a woman who looks confident and purposeful is probably less likely to be the target of hassle than one who looks nervous and vulnerable.

The only time I'd really be genuinely worried for my safety in Dublin is the odd time I'd run across a large pack of feral skangers in their teens-early 20s late in a fairly dark and isolated area. I've never once had this happen in the middle of the city centre though.

Mollyb60

benjamin d wrote: »

Practice your Resting B!tch Face.
I'm generally given a wide berth because I naturally always look like I'll cut anyone who stops me. It's a very useful trait.

THIS. Especially if you're a woman. Once you have a face like thunder and a determined stride it deters a lot of people.

Years ago in college (when I was sweet and innocent) I had an enormous black man stop me on Henry Street one night at around 10pm to tell me that I was pretty and had beautiful hair. When I kept moving on he followed me the whole way down the street to my bus stop on Abbey Street. Not talking, just following me. Called a friend of mine on my phone while I was walking but I was ****ting myself the whole time. He disappeared once I reached the bus stop.

jamie124

Rakish Paddy wrote: »

Are you male or female? If male, I think the best tactic is to just move with confidence and purpose, head up, looking ahead and walking at a fair pace. Just walk on by anyone trying to stop you and don't even look their way or say anything more than a 'sorry' if you really want to be polite. I'm quite average in terms of height and build, but in years and years of walking in Dublin at all hours of day and night, and in plenty of 'dodgy' areas, I don't think I've ever really felt unsafe and had very few serious attempts to stop me in my tracks, and I expect it's probably because I don't look like an easy or worthwhile target.

I'm not sure if this holds true for women as well, but I imagine a woman who looks confident and purposeful is probably less likely to be the target of hassle than one who looks nervous and vulnerable.

The only time I'd really be genuinely worried for my safety in Dublin is the odd time I'd run across a large pack of feral skangers in their teens-early 20s late in a fairly dark and isolated area. I've never once had this happen in the middle of the city centre though.

Yes, I'm male... I think i'll just have to keep walking with a serious face on me... and look straight ahead...

jamie124

Mollyb60 wrote: »

THIS. Especially if you're a woman. Once you have a face like thunder and a determined stride it deters a lot of people.

Years ago in college (when I was sweet and innocent) I had an enormous black man stop me on Henry Street one night at around 10pm to tell me that I was pretty and had beautiful hair. When I kept moving on he followed me the whole way down the street to my bus stop on Abbey Street. Not talking, just following me. Called a friend of mine on my phone while I was walking but I was ****ting myself the whole time. He disappeared once I reached the bus stop.

Yes the face tactic i'm sure is fairly good!... Wow! That must have been really scary! Fair play to you for walking on and acting natural! jeeze :eek::eek:

Mollyb60

jamie124 wrote: »

Yes the face tactic i'm sure is fairly good!... Wow! That must have been really scary! Fair play to you for walking on and acting natural! jeeze :eek::eek:

Yeah properly scared the pants off poor little 18 year old bogger me. I was maybe 2 or 3 months after starting college in the big schmoke too. Thankfully it hasn't happened to me since. Probably coz of the bitchy resting face.

MissFlitworth

Agree with everyone else, just keep walking. Anyone who asks me for money when I'm in town gets either ignored or a flat 'no'. And don't worry that they're fixated on you in particular, they are operating a scattergun approach to weaselling money out of people, the more you hassle the more you'll get sort of a thing. Getting aggressive or 'why won't you help me' type sad is a tactic, you haven't annoyed anyone or upset them.

After a few weeks it'll be second nature to you

Dyr

Simple thing, don't stop walking if someone's tries engage you, keep walking, say "sorry, say again?" By the time theyve repeated the question youre already past them, going "sorry, no"

These hoors have a script and you stopping is the first step in it.

CaptainInsano

Just thought I'd post in this thread as I also had a sh1te experience. Walking the other day by Connolly Station , middle of the day around noon. And passed by 4 teenagers, may 17 or 18. As I passed one of them hit me on the back of the head with a half full coke bottle, it didn't hurt but the laughter was degrading enough to turn and walk back to ask what the problem was when it went from laughter to fairly extreme intimidation, surrounded me and right up in my face and calling me a fag got etc. I pushed passed them and was jeered all the way to the dart. Are those the only options, take the abuse and walk on ? Stand up for yourself and risk getting hurt? It's depressing sometimes.

BorneTobyWilde

Get a guy to walk with you. Don't wear revealing skirts so on.
Surely someone guy is going that way too .

ahnowbrowncow

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

Get a guy to walk with you. Don't wear revealing skirts so on.
Surely someone guy is going that way too .

I hope he's not wearing revealing skirts

CaptainInsano

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

Get a guy to walk with you. Don't wear revealing skirts so on.
Surely someone guy is going that way too .

How would not wearing a revealing skirt stop me getting a bottle to the back of the head?

SB_Part2

They are looking for a reaction. In future ignore them.

jamie124

Hey Guys,
Got hassled for about 50 seconds (haha) at the bus stop that I was waiting at last night for 10 minutes...
This person (drug-addict clearly) kept asking me for change and asking and asking and I had to say "No,Sorry" then she proceeds to say "are you sorry? are ya? are ya? hahaha are ya sorry?" I ignored her and stared straight ahead and stood as tall as I could and she proceeded to ask other people and walked on... I was sh****g my pants!

Dial Hard

OP, it's very possible you're projecting something that says "easy target" to these people. I've been living in Dublin my entire life and have walked through town and waited at bus stops at far later hours than you're talking about and have literally never once been hassled. You need to work on your "Fcuk off" face.

Revealing skirt. What on earth.

People will hassle you for wearing a revealing skirt?

What decade is this?

Dial Hard

Deleted User wrote:

Revealing skirt. What on earth.

People will hassle you for wearing a revealing skirt?

Plus there's the small matter of the OP being a guy.

pilly

whiskeyman wrote: »

Headphones can be useful.
Don't make eye contact - walk briskly.
What areas are you walking down?

I wouldn't recommend headphones, it's better to be aware of what's going on around you including the noises.

pilly

CaptainInsano wrote: »

Just thought I'd post in this thread as I also had a sh1te experience. Walking the other day by Connolly Station , middle of the day around noon. And passed by 4 teenagers, may 17 or 18. As I passed one of them hit me on the back of the head with a half full coke bottle, it didn't hurt but the laughter was degrading enough to turn and walk back to ask what the problem was when it went from laughter to fairly extreme intimidation, surrounded me and right up in my face and calling me a fag got etc. I pushed passed them and was jeered all the way to the dart. Are those the only options, take the abuse and walk on ? Stand up for yourself and risk getting hurt? It's depressing sometimes.

Unfortunately I would say yes, the only option is to take the abuse and walk on. It's not worth risking your life, upsetting I know but at the end of day if you feel sorry for them for having such a sad way of life that might help. I've had someone spit on my back so I know what it's like but I've learned to have sympathy rather than anger and so keep walking.

carltonleon

jamie124 wrote: »

Hey Guys,
Got hassled for about 50 seconds (haha) at the bus stop that I was waiting at last night for 10 minutes...
This person (drug-addict clearly) kept asking me for change and asking and asking and I had to say "No,Sorry" then she proceeds to say "are you sorry? are ya? are ya? hahaha are ya sorry?" I ignored her and stared straight ahead and stood as tall as I could and she proceeded to ask other people and walked on... I was sh****g my pants!

That is generally what happens. They ask you for change and you say something like '"Sorry, I don't" and normally they just move onto the next person at the Bus Stop. Occasionally you get the extra what they would consider 'Banter' with the 'are you sorry' etc. It can be a bit intimidating but I find if you just ignore them as you did that they move on pretty quickly.

CaptainInsano

CaptainInsano wrote: »

Just thought I'd post in this thread as I also had a sh1te experience. Walking the other day by Connolly Station , middle of the day around noon. And passed by 4 teenagers, may 17 or 18. As I passed one of them hit me on the back of the head with a half full coke bottle, it didn't hurt but the laughter was degrading enough to turn and walk back to ask what the problem was when it went from laughter to fairly extreme intimidation, surrounded me and right up in my face and calling me a fag got etc. I pushed passed them and was jeered all the way to the dart. Are those the only options, take the abuse and walk on ? Stand up for yourself and risk getting hurt? It's depressing sometimes.

That's happened to me too, bottle thrown at my head, and I'm a very unimposing harmless looking woman. It didn't hurt so I kept going and didn't even acknowledge it. I reckon the only reason I never get any hassle is the speed and purpose I move through the city centre (any city centre) at. If I'm going somewhere, I'm damn well getting there and getting there as fast as I can! I'm sure people do try to ask me for change or engage me but I've been and gone before they register.

jamie124

carltonleon wrote: »

That is generally what happens. They ask you for change and you say something like '"Sorry, I don't" and normally they just move onto the next person at the Bus Stop. Occasionally you get the extra what they would consider 'Banter' with the 'are you sorry' etc. It can be a bit intimidating but I find if you just ignore them as you did that they move on pretty quickly.

Yeah that's exactly what I did.. It's a little scary as I though something was going to happen to me! and something bad!, Baring in mind that this was at 09:40PM!

Totally Tropical

Dublin can be a fairly gritty and thick skinned place.Especially in the late evening.OP if you come across as nervous or anxious then people like that will have a field day.You have to come across as relaxed as possible because if you are fearful then people will sense that fear and see you as an easy target.I don't mean to cause offense OP when i say that you do come across as a person who shouldn't be allowed leave the house without supervision.

Utdfan20titles

Pick up the bottle and bounce it off the biggest ones head and then ask the others for change to pay your fare and say you know they have it cos you saw them begging all day

Turtle_

Ah op, what really needs to happen here is you need to harden up a bit. You obviously look meek. You obviously look like a target. I'm female and in the 12 or so years that I've been in the city centre at all hours I've never had a problem.

Don't wear headphones, they'll only dull your perception of your surroundings. Head up, shoulders back, chest out a bit. Square your jaw and just say "no" and ignore. Don't bother with sorry, I'm not sorry I don't have change for them. Practice in front of a mirror if you have to. Really you just need to project an air of "fcuk off". And leave your phone and wallet in a secure pocket.