Desperate to lose weight..

Pecker31

Hi..

As I write this I am mortified. I am 30 years of age and approaching 17 stone. I am at my heaviest. For years I have been in slimming clubs, throwing money at gyms, going to healers etc trying to find a fix to make me stop craving the fatty/crap food that I am eating.

My diet is horrendous and I am miserable. I have been put on Anti Depressants and they have helped lift my mood and there working great... but the food is still there.

I am very happy in other aspects of my life, like my job, boyfriend who I adore and very close to my family but my weight is really getting me down.

Whenever I start a diet I stick to it with a week and give us.

My typical days starts with a

coffee, 2 x hash browns and 2 x sausage rolls

lunch
coke, sandwich, crisps and chocolate

dinner
Roast

Snack
Coffee and choc.

Its awful and I am mortified.

What can I do to snap out of this rut.

GreatDefector

Right back at you. 32 and was 112kg

The past few weeks I've been using my fitness pal app and TBH without changing WHAT I've been eating, i've changed HOW MUCH I've been eating. It's shocking when you see how much you really and mfp really helps with portion control. Down 3kg since last month

An example, I thought a lunchbox with pasta and tuna was good, which it is but when I weighed it, it was 2 portions. So a lot if time I was having equivalent of 2 of everything per day.

I'm also using "happy scale" for iPhone and it breaks weight down into 10 milestones and averages weight graph making a nice smoother graph

That's all I've been doing and so far is been very easy and I don't say that lightly

Find what works and do it!... Plenty of advice here but not everything will suit you but you can and will lose that weight of its what you want. I know I will. Positive thinking!

JC01

Speaking as someone who was very very unhappy with how I looked 3 years ago and now looks for an excuse to not wear a tshirt, I would say it's all down to discipline pure and simple.

You could spend thousands getting nutritionists, PTs, psychiatrists etc to try and "fix" you but at the end of the day it comes down to a very simple choice; are you in charge of your body or is your cravings?

Get up in the morning and eat a small portion of weetabix/porridge

For lunch eat a proper homemade mixed ceaser salad with a tiny amount of dressing.

Dinner eat your roast but smaller portions

Supper meal some fruit.

Water with every meal and lots of it.

Go for a brisk walk in the evening for a half hour doesn't matter how far you go just walk for a half hour.

None of that is a strict diet or exercise plan it's just a list of things to do for a day.
Do that for one solid month and congratulations you have taken control of your body. At that point go to a professional and stop listening to a crazy person on the internet with questionable advice. Get a proper diet plan with macro breakdowns and a firm well rounded exercise plan to lose weight as well as improving cardiovascular and muscular health. Follow that plan for a year and see what you can accomplish, by then you will have fallen in love with a healthy lifestyle and looking your best.

I'm sure someone will be along to call me all sorts of things and say ignore me but it was exactly that simple bone-headed just-bloody-do-it attitude that kick started me on a great path. I'd hazard a guess that 80% of people hate there bodies, the only difference in them and people who love there's is generally the ability of the latter to bully their cravings to eat crap and be lazy into a little corner and get on with it

*apologies if that comes across a tad ranting but that's the actual rant I had at myself on day one!!

SusieBlue

I won't even begin to give you any nutritional advice because I'm nowhere near as knowledgeable as some of the regular posters here.

But I will comment on the mental side of things. I also struggle with my weight and find that any time I've gone cold turkey, it hasn't worked.

Start small, Rome wasn't built in a day. Maybe cut out fizzy drinks. Start taking a walk in the evening. These small changes will make you feel more positive and like your making changes without being too drastic. Cut down more and more until eventually you are eating well.

I too once ate a diet like yours now, and I cut out absolutely everything, living off chicken and broccoli and going to the gym twice a day. I didn't stick to it for more than a couple of months & I was absolutely miserable.
Anytime I ate anything that wasn't a vegetable I was racked with guilt. I couldn't enjoy my meals. I refused every social occasion I was invited to because I was afraid temptation would get the better of me and I'd gorge myself. And I ended up putting back on more weight than I had lost.

Now I eat an extremely varied diet, including the odd takeaway & won't deny myself a glass of wine one a week if I want one.
Learn to enjoy fresh food - find a way of cooking the things you don't enjoy so much so that you like them.
An example of this for me was sweet potato. Couldn't stomach the stuff mashed up at all but cut into fries and sprinkled with paprika? My mouth is watering just thinking about it! I wasn't the biggest fan of veg either but that was because I was boiling/steaming it. Now I really enjoy looking at a tray full of roasted colourful veggies & they taste great too.

I'm not where I want to be just yet but I didn't put on weight over night & I won't lose it over night. I think of myself as a work in progress, and I'm enjoying what I'm eating along the way instead of being really restrictive & miserable. You should approach overhauling your diet in the same way.

Don't be so hard on yourself. The hardest part is the mental motivation, believe you do it and your half way there. Best of luck!

Alf Veedersane

"Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change".

You know your diet is awful so that's what you need to work on. Sure, build in some form of exercise you know you'll do, whether that's walking, swimming, running, lifting weights or whatever. The best exercise is the one you'll do.

But in terms of food, you have to stop thinking of yourself as being controlled by food. You need to take back control and control your choices, in terms of both food quality and food quantity.

If it works better for you, change one thing at a time, e.g. have something like eggs, porridge or anything more filling and better for you at the start of the day instead of hash browns and sausage rolls.

Snarky Puppy

Start with some simple changes - so you stick with it, and go for a 30min walk ever evening. Brisk pace with some headphones.

Some Simple Changes:
coffee (no sugar)
fruit n fibre or porridge (quick oats, maple syrup).

Have breakfast before you go to work - I assume you're grabbing the hash browns in a garage or a Spar or something?

11am - 2 pieces of fruit. A banana & an apple. Or some melon, or pineapple.

lunch
water, sandwich; do you like tuna? Try 3 slices of McCambridge with spinach, coleslaw & tuna.

3pm - 1 piece of fruit & a yogurt. Or put some grapes & brazil nuts in a yogurt. It's delicious.

dinner
Roast - do you have this every day? Try control your portion size

Snack
Coffee (no sugar) and piece of DARK choc.

Don't eat after your last snack. Drink water - fizzy drinks are muck. Or if you HAVE to, put a squirt of that Robinsons stuff in your water.

Pecker31

JC01 wrote: »

Speaking as someone who was very very unhappy with how I looked 3 years ago and now looks for an excuse to not wear a tshirt, I would say it's all down to discipline pure and simple.

You could spend thousands getting nutritionists, PTs, psychiatrists etc to try and "fix" you but at the end of the day it comes down to a very simple choice; are you in charge of your body or is your cravings?

Get up in the morning and eat a small portion of weetabix/porridge

For lunch eat a proper homemade mixed ceaser salad with a tiny amount of dressing.

Dinner eat your roast but smaller portions

Supper meal some fruit.

Water with every meal and lots of it.

Go for a brisk walk in the evening for a half hour doesn't matter how far you go just walk for a half hour.

None of that is a strict diet or exercise plan it's just a list of things to do for a day.
Do that for one solid month and congratulations you have taken control of your body. At that point go to a professional and stop listening to a crazy person on the internet with questionable advice. Get a proper diet plan with macro breakdowns and a firm well rounded exercise plan to lose weight as well as improving cardiovascular and muscular health. Follow that plan for a year and see what you can accomplish, by then you will have fallen in love with a healthy lifestyle and looking your best.

I'm sure someone will be along to call me all sorts of things and say ignore me but it was exactly that simple bone-headed just-bloody-do-it attitude that kick started me on a great path. I'd hazard a guess that 80% of people hate there bodies, the only difference in them and people who love there's is generally the ability of the latter to bully their cravings to eat crap and be lazy into a little corner and get on with it

*apologies if that comes across a tad ranting but that's the actual rant I had at myself on day one!!

Hi no I appreciate the honesty, I don't really have an excuse my boyfriend is very active and would go with me any night that I ask him. It's defo mind over matter I just need to have some self control.

Thanks for the advise.

Pecker31

Snarky Puppy wrote: »

Start with some simple changes - so you stick with it, and go for a 30min walk ever evening. Brisk pace with some headphones.

Some Simple Changes:
coffee (no sugar)
fruit n fibre or porridge (quick oats, maple syrup).

Have breakfast before you go to work - I assume you're grabbing the hash browns in a garage or a Spar or something?

11am - 2 pieces of fruit. A banana & an apple. Or some melon, or pineapple.

lunch
water, sandwich; do you like tuna? Try 3 slices of McCambridge with spinach, coleslaw & tuna.

3pm - 1 piece of fruit & a yogurt. Or put some grapes & brazil nuts in a yogurt. It's delicious.

dinner
Roast - do you have this every day? Try control your portion size

Snack
Coffee (no sugar) and piece of DARK choc.

Don't eat after your last snack. Drink water - fizzy drinks are muck. Or if you HAVE to, put a squirt of that Robinsons stuff in your water.

Hey ya its all garage stuff.. mortifying isn't the word I don't even tell my partner about it.

Once I have one good day I know I will stick to it, it's stick to it all the time is what I am missing out on, and when I do eat good and go walking I feel like I am on cloud 9... just wish it would stick in my head!

Pecker31

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

"Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change".

You know your diet is awful so that's what you need to work on. Sure, build in some form of exercise you know you'll do, whether that's walking, swimming, running, lifting weights or whatever. The best exercise is the one you'll do.

But in terms of food, you have to stop thinking of yourself as being controlled by food. You need to take back control and control your choices, in terms of both food quality and food quantity.

If it works better for you, change one thing at a time, e.g. have something like eggs, porridge or anything more filling and better for you at the start of the day instead of hash browns and sausage rolls.

I love that quote, thank you.

I do feel like I am being controlled by food... but there I go again making an excuse for something that is my fault!

Snarky Puppy

Pecker31 wrote: »

Hey ya its all garage stuff.. mortifying isn't the word I don't even tell my partner about it.

Once I have one good day I know I will stick to it, it's stick to it all the time is what I am missing out on, and when I do eat good and go walking I feel like I am on cloud 9... just wish it would stick in my head!

Don't be embarrassed. Just make small changes - sort out your breakfast & cut out the crappy snacks & soft drinks; they're the main things that stand out. You need to still have something to look forward to each day (like your evening coffee & bit of chocolate) so you don't quit. The change can't be too extreme.

Don't just flip your diet to some ultra healthy, or you'll never stick with it; as you already know.

Alf Veedersane

Pecker31 wrote: »

I love that quote, thank you.

I do feel like I am being controlled by food... but there I go again making an excuse for something that is my fault!

It's a subtle but important mindset. When you reconfigure things so that you know it's your choice to have something or not, even though it's hard, it makes you feel stronger in making a better choice.

It might be just on a portion size or being in a shop and not choosing to buy chocolates or crisps. You can remind yourself after you leave about how you made the choice not to get those and it's a positive feedback loop. Sounds a bit airy-fairy but it can help.

If you haven't, sit down with your boyfriend and tell him what you want to do. Help him to help you, whether it's being that annoying voice that asks if you really want that bar of chocolate or whether it's company on a walk. Support is important too.

but remember every choice you make is yours and the more you make better choices, the more you know you can make the better choices and that in itself is empowering and helpful.

Zillah

I find I crave sugar if I haven't eaten enough proper food. At the time I feel convinced that only sugar will satisfy me, but if I eat some decent food the craving goes away anyway.

Try eating large meals with lots of fresh veg. The feeling of fullness will help you avoid cravings for the junk. Any part of your normal appetite that isn't satisfied by good food will probably end up getting filled by junk. So don't feel ashamed or afraid of good food. You deserve to eat and to enjoy eating, just make sure you eat your proper meals when you should before you consider indulging other cravings.

Should be a decent start. Also, as you start weaning yourself off the crap you'll probably feel like you can't live without it. Don't worry, it will get easier over time, your appetite will adapt.

fussyonion

OP, you won't ever change unless something clicks inside you.
Believe me, I was you up until last year.

I tried slimming clubs but my heart was never really into it and I hated not being "allowed" my favourite foods, so I gave up and went back to how I was eating, even though I was so miserable and hated my body.

But something clicked in me last year and I thought "I've had enough of being this weight. I'm sick of each year passing and I'm getting sadder and sadder."
My weight controlled every aspect of my day.

I'd think about it from the moment I got up to the moment I fell asleep.
I avoided social situations because I had very little to wear because I hated shopping BECAUSE it was so hard to find clothes in my size.
I sat a certain way in my seat so people wouldn't see the rolls of fat.
I breathed in ALL the time, sucking my tummy in so much that I'd be cramping.

It was ridiculous.
So I decided enough was enough, joined a gym, met a really great trainer there who educated me on food, told me nothing was banned once I ate treats in moderation and I developed an absolute love for the gym.

A year on I have lost almost 6 stone, I'm still losing weight, still enjoying treats but most of all, I'm so much happier.
I can't believe I've come so far.

If it clicks in your head that you want it, nothing will get in your way.
As for nutrition advice, I'll leave that to others as we're all different.

Best of luck and remember, this is a journey you will never regret embarking on.

granty1987

What & how much you eat is the most important thing.

When trying to balance exercise with this I would give a piece of advice.

Take up an activity or sport that you will get some form of enjoyment out of. Try and make sure that you like it and can honestly call it fun.

The reason I say this is, first of all, you will want to get up and do it a lot more than something you do not like. Secondly, when people participate in exercise that they are enjoying and having fun doing, they are not inclined to make bad food decisions after the exercise. People who are not enjoying it and force themselves to walk/run that 5km or whatever will then turn to food as a form of reward and will typically make a bad decision and go for the crap, processed foods.

I always prefer group activities / sports as it incorporates a socialising aspect to exercise and it is something i always look forward to doing. If someone told me to go out for a run by myselg then id never go as I find it incredibly boring. The hardest part about group activities / sports is getting there if youre nervous. Just go for it!

Pecker31

fussyonion wrote: »

OP, you won't ever change unless something clicks inside you.
Believe me, I was you up until last year.

I tried slimming clubs but my heart was never really into it and I hated not being "allowed" my favourite foods, so I gave up and went back to how I was eating, even though I was so miserable and hated my body.

But something clicked in me last year and I thought "I've had enough of being this weight. I'm sick of each year passing and I'm getting sadder and sadder."
My weight controlled every aspect of my day.

I'd think about it from the moment I got up to the moment I fell asleep.
I avoided social situations because I had very little to wear because I hated shopping BECAUSE it was so hard to find clothes in my size.
I sat a certain way in my seat so people wouldn't see the rolls of fat.
I breathed in ALL the time, sucking my tummy in so much that I'd be cramping.

It was ridiculous.
So I decided enough was enough, joined a gym, met a really great trainer there who educated me on food, told me nothing was banned once I ate treats in moderation and I developed an absolute love for the gym.

A year on I have lost almost 6 stone, I'm still losing weight, still enjoying treats but most of all, I'm so much happier.
I can't believe I've come so far.

If it clicks in your head that you want it, nothing will get in your way.
As for nutrition advice, I'll leave that to others as we're all different.

Best of luck and remember, this is a journey you will never regret embarking on.

Firstly huge congrat's on your weight loss, it can't have been easy you must be so proud of yourself.

Ya I often hear of people saying "something clicked" and I nearly use that as an excuse as to wait for the click... instead of getting up and doing it!

Prisoner6409

A medical issue raised it's ugly head earlier this year with me and one of the helpful things to do to undermine it's effects was exercise. So around Feb or so I began walking and eating a bit more healthy, which in my case meant a lot less snacking between meals, cutting down(not out) on biscuits and basically only eating at meal times. The walking part started out pretty low key, taking the dog for a 30 min walk 5 times a week but that soon developed into a 90 min walk and on occasion, 3 hour walks and pretty brisk walks at that. Although it had not been my aim, in the space of 4-5 months I went from 13 stone to 10 stone without even passing the doors of a gym and I do put most of that weight loss down to the walking. I think if you could get in a one hour walk every day and took to eating only at meal times and cutting down on sugary foods you would see some decent weight loss after about 6 to 8 weeks. My issue now is keeping the weight off, best of luck with your efforts.

Alf Veedersane

Pecker31 wrote: »

Firstly huge congrat's on your weight loss, it can't have been easy you must be so proud of yourself.

Ya I often hear of people saying "something clicked" and I nearly use that as an excuse as to wait for the click... instead of getting up and doing it!

The click was the click of the mouse when you posted the OP.

People here are always willing to help - use that and put it to good effect. Start making changes. You're the only one who can do that.

It won't always be easy but discipline is the bridge that gets you from where you are to the point where you've achieved your goal.

Deshi Basara

It generally always comes down to diet - as I'm sure you've heard "you cannot out-exercise a bad diet".

Try preparing meals a head of time. It doesn't have to be every meal eaten out of tuppaware, but address the problem areas - especially the likes of work where options would be limited & temptation is high.

Don't buy junk food for the house, if it's there you absolutely will eat it. Make sure there's plenty of fruit, unsalted nuts etc.

Stimulate yourself in other ways - I find it's easier to indulge when I'm home & not busy than when I'm out & busy.

DRINK WATER - this will help an awful lot. Drink litres of the stuff - don't drink fizzy or juices, just absolutely neck the water out of it. A lot of my friends & colleagues with weight problems always seem to have a very VERY low water intake.

If you DO indulge a little, it isn't the end of the world. Don't use it as an excuse to go completely off the rails for the rest of the day. Enjoy your treat, then refocus on your goals.

Understand more than anything that this takes time, but you'll feel yourself having more energy, feeling more positive and feeling happier as you continue forward you will have a few stumbles, but making this post is a good step forward. More power to you!

pumpkin4life

Ketogenic low carb diet.

Eat as much green veg, fish, meat, eggs, cheese as you want. Fruit and nuts in moderation. Stay away from pasta, potatoes, bread, rice etc. Keep carbs below 50gs a day, if not even less, less than 30g even. Maybe one day a week you can have a junk food day, but maybe not for now.

If you're a drinker, drink whiskey or vodka when you go out instead of beer. If you like diet/fizzy drinks, drink coke zero or diet coke say instead. If you're in a fast food place, order the burgers and ditch the buns.

I know three lads (including myself) who have lost a ton of weight doing this, in addition to a load of people attesting to it online.

So it works. Look into intermittent fasting/leangains as well. Again, these have worked very well for me.

Also, start lifting weights.

Promise you, yous will drop the weight.

mloc123

pumpkin4life wrote: »

Ketogenic low carb diet.

Eat as much green veg, fish, meat, eggs, cheese as you want. Fruit and nuts in moderation. Stay away from pasta, potatoes, bread, rice etc. Keep carbs below 50gs a day, if not even less, less than 30g even. Maybe one day a week you can have a junk food day, but maybe not for now.

If you're a drinker, drink whiskey or vodka when you go out instead of beer. If you like diet/fizzy drinks, drink coke zero or diet coke say instead. If you're in a fast food place, order the burgers and ditch the buns.

I know three lads (including myself) who have lost a ton of weight doing this, in addition to a load of people attesting to it online.

So it works. Look into intermittent fasting/leangains as well. Again, these have worked very well for me.

Also, start lifting weights.

Promise you, yous will drop the weight.

This is not sustainable and will turn into another 'fad' diet. It is also too much change at once for the OP.

What others have said, make small changes first.. cut out the crappy breakfast, reduce portion sizes and move.. start with walking each day.

If you decide to change your entire life starting Monday morning as suggested above.. it will not work long term.

Pecker31

mloc123 wrote: »

This is not sustainable and will turn into another 'fad' diet. It is also too much change at once for the OP.

What others have said, make small changes first.. cut out the crappy breakfast, reduce portion sizes and move.. start with walking each day.

If you decide to change your entire life starting Monday morning as suggested above.. it will not work long term.

TBH I agree, really appreciate the advise tho but I have tried no carbs, little carbs, etc and found while I do lose it quickly it also comes back on quicker and more of it. I don't think its healthy to restrict the carbs that much either. Just my opinion

pumpkin4life

mloc123 wrote: »

This is not sustainable and will turn into another 'fad' diet. It is also too much change at once for the OP.

What others have said, make small changes first.. cut out the crappy breakfast, reduce portion sizes and move.. start with walking each day.

If you decide to change your entire life starting Monday morning as suggested above.. it will not work long term.

**** I ain't special and sure I've been doing it for six months straight at this stage.

My two cents. Best of luck OP.

Alf Veedersane

Pecker31 wrote: »

TBH I agree, really appreciate the advise tho but I have tried no carbs, little carbs, etc and found while I do lose it quickly it also comes back on quicker and more of it. I don't think its healthy to restrict the carbs that much either. Just my opinion

It works for some but not really because of the reduction in carbs. The reason you can eat a lot of green veg, meat and fish is because they're not hugely calorie dense and so you can eat a good bit to the point where you've had plenty but without consuming a huge amount of calories.

Ultimately, you want a reduction in calories in a balanced way.

Address food quality and portion sizes and you're moving in the right direction.

livedadream

Pecker31 wrote: »

Firstly huge congrat's on your weight loss, it can't have been easy you must be so proud of yourself.

Ya I often hear of people saying "something clicked" and I nearly use that as an excuse as to wait for the click... instead of getting up and doing it!

i love reading these threads, they keep me so motived.

im the same down 6 stone 8 lbs.

it killed to lose it honestly and i was the same when people talked about it clicking.

the truth is (for me anyway) i started and a few months in it clicked.

i was a woman on a mission.

get up and do it and the click will come.

slow and stead wins the race too.

keep it up!

FizzleSticks

This post has been deleted.

The Young Wan

Hi there

Clicked on to this thread for some tups on how to lose a few myself, and I think I saw on a previous thread you're from West Waterford? I'm from the same area as you (think the small village out past the golf club) and I know of a really good trainer around the area. If you want I can pop you a PM with some recommendations?

Pro Hoc Vice

Just personal experience starting with both strict diet and serious training at same time never worked for me.

I am 185cm was 135 kgs

The only real change I made was a few simple rules

1. Healthy breakfast for me porridge
2. Nice lunch
3 evening something light

The main rule is nothing after 7pm except water or tea or a coffee. If the craving was mental bad then a small bit of dark chocolate with coffee. The funny thing is the cravings for me the worst time was 6pm to about midnight before and after those times no real issue.

After a long time I dropped to 85 kgs

Once I had a reasonable amount of weight off I started walking nothing over the top just built up steps on pedometer.

The next phase is training as I now need tone. But for me the most important thing is to accept its a long term total life change. I do have my break outs going to dinner or drinks but try to keep that at a minimum.