Sick of exercise....

Parchment

Hi All,

Any advice would really be appreciated.Sorry that its so long but i need to share it with someone, its really upsetting me.

Background - i have a history of anorexia with obsessive exercise. All those demons are dealt with as well as they can be now. I am a healthy weight (but i am a dress size larger than i have ever been and the largest i ever was was a uk10) and i see the error of my ways with exercising.

I am totally healthy, see my gp regularly. I finished with my psych last year and feel i am doing well in that department too. I am able to cope with things and dont fall into old ways.

I was always active and into sports even before the eating disorder. In the bad days i went to the gym 6 days a week and did workouts out 7 days a week regardless. I would workout before work, during my lunch break and after work - a combo of yoga/power walking/running/cardio. i was exhausted all the time. I also swam and cycled quite a bit. I did circuit workouts too with weights. i used to love horse riding too.

Last year i had been struggling mentally with going to the gym - i had grown to hate it. I still loved swimming and also yoga along with power walking and some outdoor running. But it all started to fall out of favour with me at the end of the year. i would be in tears at the thought of exercising in any shape or form.i felt like crying at the thought of even going to a class to do yoga. I stopped going to the gym at the start of December 2015. I would sleep more and do 2x 30 min power walks at work and possibly a 50 min power walk after work/5k run.

Now i still do power walks and possibly one 5k run a week. I suspended my gym membership as i cant bear the thought of going. I dont even want to swim/use the sauna - which i used to LOVE. i cant even bear the thought of going to the gym building. i cant explain - it just all seems like too much for me - even the effort of going to the gym to swim etc. its a 5 min drive from my house. It just seems overwhelming to me.

i feel bad im not doing more exercise as i used to love it. i LOVED swimming and i LOVED yoga but now i dont really care. I do miss swimming but i cant find the will inside me to go and even swim for 30 mins.


I want to be as fit as i used to be. i want to get back to swimming and using the sauna. Also yoga too but i just cant bear the thought of it. it all seems like a huge chore to me.

Maybe all of this is coming from how hard i used to push myself. I still feel like i need some sort of schedule for my exercise and maybe i am rebelling against that as it was such an obsession before. i want to get back to my size 10 and feel confident with my body. I also want to get over this mental block.

What is wrong with me?

colossus-x

It sounds to me that because you have obsessed over exercise so much you have burn't yourself out mentally. You mentioned that that you did 2 power walks and one run on the same day which is 3 separate sessions in one day which is completely over the top.

You need to re-set and I could only suggest that you take some time off exercise completely, I don't know how long, maybe a couple of weeks and then pick on exercise, say swimming, as you mentioned you loved it, and do that 3-4 times a week and nothing else whatsoever. Do not exercise 2 days in a row. Go for walks maybe but not power-walks, casual walks.

I suggest you remain in the habit of exercising every other day when your back to normal or you'll just end up back where you were eventually. Remember it's when you rest that you grow and get stronger so don't feel your doing nothing on your off days.

You'll have to focus more on your diet to keep the pounds off instead of expecting to burn off the calories, which you can't rely on anymore as that's driving you into the ground. G'luk.

Mr. CooL ICE

It seems like the only exercise you have ever done has been cardio with yoga. Maybe changing your exercise routine and general outlook might help.

Lots of posters in this forum are into weights. Perhaps changing your focus to getting stronger would give you something different to aim for and present a new challenge? There really is more to life than walking and running.

Zillah

Parchment wrote: »

I finished with my psych last year and feel i am doing well in that department too.

Can I suggest that seeing someone - not a full blown psychiatrist, but maybe a counsellor or therapist - in an on-going capacity would be a good idea, given that you still seem to be experiencing distress around your body and health.

I agree with colossus-x that taking a full and total break from all exercise for a couple of weeks might be a good idea - reset your behaviours. There's something very anxious about the fits and bursts of working out that you've described, and the mental preoccupation you have around them (wanting to go, hating the idea, doing three sessions in one day, etc).

Maybe you just have tons of negative associations with the gym due to your previous behaviours. Doing something entirely unrelated might work. You could also abandon all of this cardio nonsense and do just a weights program for a while - especially given that they don't emphasise losing weight so much as being strong and having good body composition.

Sunny Dayz

Hi Op - I'm guessing you did the swimming, gym etc all on your own? May I suggest joining a group or a club rather than exercising alone. Eg a fit4life group, an athletics club, a group class in your gym, a swim group, zumba, bokwa, you get the idea. I think perhaps the social aspect might help you, you are getting your exercise but you are also getting to interact with other people and maybe put a bit of "fun" into exercising.

Parchment

Zillah wrote: »

Can I suggest that seeing someone - not a full blown psychiatrist, but maybe a counsellor or therapist - in an on-going capacity would be a good idea, given that you still seem to be experiencing distress around your body and health.

I agree with colossus-x that taking a full and total break from all exercise for a couple of weeks might be a good idea - reset your behaviours. There's something very anxious about the fits and bursts of working out that you've described, and the mental preoccupation you have around them (wanting to go, hating the idea, doing three sessions in one day, etc).

Maybe you just have tons of negative associations with the gym due to your previous behaviours. Doing something entirely unrelated might work. You could also abandon all of this cardio nonsense and do just a weights program for a while - especially given that they don't emphasise losing weight so much as being strong and having good body composition.

Nicolas Cage wrote: »

It seems like the only exercise you have ever done has been cardio with yoga. Maybe changing your exercise routine and general outlook might help.

Lots of posters in this forum are into weights. Perhaps changing your focus to getting stronger would give you something different to aim for and present a new challenge? There really is more to life than walking and running.

Thanks for the reply. I have tried weight training and did not like it. Weights are the "in" thing at the moment but they are not for me.

I think I showed how varied the exercise I used to do was - walking, running, cycling, yoga, swimming and horse riding. I still hugely enjoy walking outside listening to a podcast so I wont be giving that up any time soon.

I was seeing a counsellor when I finished with my psych and she was happy I finished with her when I did. I felt she had no more to offer me.

I need to keep fit and healthy - we all do. I also want to be back at my normal weight and exercise is a part of getting there. That's why I posted. I am just trying to figure it out. Thanks for your replies.

Alf Veedersane

If you enjoy walking, keep doing it.

Don't force yourself to do something you don't get some enjoyment from.

I would advocate a couple of weeks off trying to do stuff you used to but don't want to now. In time you'll either want to go back or not. If not, you just start trying new ideas.

One thing that did occur to me: maybe try going for a swim/sauna elsewhere. Maybe there's something sub-consciously related to the building?

seamus

I want to echo Zillah's statement here, but without feigning to try and diagnose anything. A sudden drop in motivation to exercise and severe anxiety about doing things which were once your day-to-day routine, is a red flag for many creeping conditions.

Going to see a psychologist is not a failure or an admission that you're ill. If you've attended one before, there's a good chance you will need to return to then again every now and again to give yourself a spit-shine. Managing mental health issues is more akin to having a recurring skin condition than a broken arm. Most of the time you can manage on your own. Sometimes you'll get a bad flare-up and need professional help.

Everyone else here is likely correct and you've become bogged down by the routine so much that it's boring you. Joining a club related to what you enjoy doing could be massively beneficial. But going to see your GP and psychologist can at the very least rule out any other problems. You might just be told, "You know what, you're knackered. Get more sleep, eat more fruit and veg and go back to your exercise in 3 weeks".

Parchment

seamus wrote: »

I want to echo Zillah's statement here, but without feigning to try and diagnose anything. A sudden drop in motivation to exercise and severe anxiety about doing things which were once your day-to-day routine, is a red flag for many creeping conditions.

Going to see a psychologist is not a failure or an admission that you're ill. If you've attended one before, there's a good chance you will need to return to then again every now and again to give yourself a spit-shine. Managing mental health issues is more akin to having a recurring skin condition than a broken arm. Most of the time you can manage on your own. Sometimes you'll get a bad flare-up and need professional help.

Everyone else here is likely correct and you've become bogged down by the routine so much that it's boring you. Joining a club related to what you enjoy doing could be massively beneficial. But going to see your GP and psychologist can at the very least rule out any other problems. You might just be told, "You know what, you're knackered. Get more sleep, eat more fruit and veg and go back to your exercise in 3 weeks".

Its been a decline in interest since maybe September last year. Life otherwise is good - im healthy and happy but this brings me stress. Sports/Activity were always a part of my life and I feel like im doing something "wrong" without them. Its a feeling of guilt as I know we need to keep active - and I am keeping doing that as much as I can.

I sleep lots and eat pretty well so I know there isn't anything else too major going on. I don't think a club would be for me as I am a massively competitive person and get very upset when I am not the best (which is never going to happen!) and I am not massively social so I think a club would bring me more trouble than good. thanks for the reply.

groovyg

Op if you are getting out for power walks and one run a week thats exercise you don't need to go to the gym to exercise. From your post you seem to be just stuck in a rut and maybe as other posters have said you just need a mental break from going to the gym, set your self a new goal e.g 5k in x amount of time. You say like running, cycling swimming would you consider doing a triathlon? also joining a club will only bring you on and get you doing something with other people. Its good to work in groups as it really improves your speed and you also learn a lot from what other people are doing.

Transform

Parchment wrote: »

Its been a decline in interest since maybe September last year. Life otherwise is good - im healthy and happy but this brings me stress. Sports/Activity were always a part of my life and I feel like im doing something "wrong" without them. Its a feeling of guilt as I know we need to keep active - and I am keeping doing that as much as I can.

I sleep lots and eat pretty well so I know there isn't anything else too major going on. I don't think a club would be for me as I am a massively competitive person and get very upset when I am not the best (which is never going to happen!) and I am not massively social so I think a club would bring me more trouble than good. thanks for the reply.

consider working one to one with a trainer??

One of the main things here is that the style of exercise you're doing (walking, swimming, yoga etc) tend to require large investments in time for very little output and can serve to drop muscle as opposed to possibly adding some strength and mobility work to your training.

Think some one to one would help you develop a program based around getting better at some basic body weight exercises, throw in some simple fun gymnastics and all would ramp your metabolism up which can pick your energy up big time

farmchoice

i would recommend you join a squash club. a good game of squash is a serious workout but it is also great fun. it has been voted the worlds healthiest sport.

http://www.topendsports.com/world/lists/fittest-sport/healthiest-forbes.htm

now i am recommending squash because i play it and i love it but i'm sure there are other people who would recommend other sports and they would be equally as good.

what i will say for squash though is that it is very easy to take up, its a very simple game with very little cost attached, a cheap racket will set you back €20.00. there is a level for everyone and people play competitively right up into there seventy's.

squash is very addictive though, seriously. the amount of people we have had who have started as complete beginners and and very soon are playing 3-5 times a week is incredible. to the point where some they are playing twice a day!! i kid you not. so be warned. its very sociable too its a great way to meet new people and make new friends.

Dtp1979

farmchoice wrote: »

i would recommend you join a squash club. a good game of squash is a serious workout but it is also great fun. it has been voted the worlds healthiest sport.

http://www.topendsports.com/world/lists/fittest-sport/healthiest-forbes.htm

now i am recommending squash because i play it and i love it but i'm sure there are other people who would recommend other sports and they would be equally as good.

what i will say for squash though is that it is very easy to take up, its a very simple game with very little cost attached, a cheap racket will set you back €20.00. there is a level for everyone and people play competitively right up into there seventy's.

squash is very addictive though, seriously. the amount of people we have had who have started as complete beginners and and very soon are playing 3-5 times a week is incredible. to the point where some they are playing twice a day!! i kid you not. so be warned. its very sociable too its a great way to meet new people and make new friends.

Squash much?

GalwayGrrrrrl

How about taking up a new hobby that is active but fun too. Off the top of my head this could be dancing (salsa, jive, tap) or mountain climbing/hill walking, maybe kayaking? Even something like becoming a leader with scouts would get you moving but not have exercise as the goal in itself. If you just cut back to a 30 minute walk 5 times a week that is enough for general health so try not to put too much pressure on yourself.