Which parents did you have

Only catching up with last weekends papers now, there was an interesting article by Diarmaid Ferriter about third level students.

When you did your leaving cert did you have parents who barley knew you were doing the leaving cert and you just had to get on with it.

or did you have

The modern phenomena of parents booking annul leave around the child's leaving cert so they are there to support them, parents who knew everything about the leaving cert, had grinds, and were manoeuvred, helped, supported in every way by parents.

AnonoBoy

I had the type that were aware I was doing the Leaving, asked how I was getting on but didn't tiptoe around me like I was dying or something because they realised they're just exams.

Y'know, normal parents.

Dial Hard

My parents went on holidays during my Leaving.

I'm the the youngest of 5, any "novelty" had long worn off.

I had parents who wanted me to do my best and be happy regardless. I'm not sure what category that fits in to.

What about yourself OP?

I always though that thing of a parents taking annual leave around the leaving cert was a bit of myth until I came across parents who were doing it.

The Moldy Gowl

Catching up on last weeks papers, on the Friday of next week?

What?

lc180

My dad used to always say " even if you fail them all, I'm sure you'll some kind of job to keep you happy"

He meant it in a very sweet way, trying not to put pressure on me but at the time I didn't even want to consider failing!

Deleted User

Deleted User wrote: »

What about yourself OP?

I come from a large family and when I did my leaving cert parents fawning over you or having much to do with the school would not have been common so I was left to get on with it.

I had two weeks study leave before the A-levels and my parents, who both worked abroad, made sure they were there so that I had every support I needed for the few weeks before and during the exams. They did have high expectations, but they didn't make it a pressure cooker situation.

Elemonator

My parents were forever at me. My dad a masters and more in maths and engineering so he was insistent on giving maths grinds. While I did well in maths, still only pulled mid 400's and its really held me back. Listen to your parents kids.

Glico Man

My parents had a strange approach to me doing my Leaving Cert. While I was studying they were normal and didn't tip toe around me. Then, it all changed, as they decided to separate the morning of my first exam. Made things a little tough to concentrate for that and the rest :pac:

mariaalice

mariaalice wrote: »

I come from a large family and when I did my leaving cert parents fawning over you or having much to do with the school would not have been common so I was left to get on with it.

Tbh, I don't think much of parents being attentive being characterised as 'fawning over' their kids.

recylingbin

My parents died doing their leaving cert so they just wanted me to be safe. Fortunately, I made it and we all went on holiday afterwards.

Candie

Candie wrote: »

Tbh, I don't think much of parents being attentive being characterised as 'fawning over' their kids.

I do not mean that in a bad its just when big family were common parents did not have as much time to devote to each child.

mariaalice

mariaalice wrote: »

I do not mean that in a bad its just when big family were common parents did not have as much time to devote to each child.

Fawning over them implies something else about both the parents and the kids.

My parents were around for me and encouraged me, they wanted me to do well. They didn't fawn over me just because they took time off to be around, and they didn't have me suicidal with stress. One of the things they said again and again is that life will work out, no matter how you do in exams.

Oranage2

lc180 wrote: »

My dad used to always say " even if you fail them all, I'm sure you'll some kind of job to keep you happy"

He meant it in a very sweet way, trying not to put pressure on me but at the time I didn't even want to consider failing!

And what type of job do you have if you don't mind me asking ?

seamus

My parents moved house in the middle of my leaving. I'm not joking, after my last exam I went to the off-licence, got a shoulder of vodka and came back to an empty house with my mates where we drank it while eating lunch and then got ready to go into town.

When I say "empty house" I mean practically devoid of furniture as it had all been moved out over the previous two weeks...while I was sitting my leaving cert.

Sounds way worse than it was. My parents and I stayed in the house, my brothers went to the other house, so the disruption to me was minimal. All I was doing was getting up, going to the exams, eating and studying anyway. I was the youngest of four, so my parents were acutely aware of how unimportant the leaving cert was in real terms.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

My parents put a lot of store by education, as they only got to primary school themselves. They were supportive and helped keep me grounded and not too stressed. They were not overbearing in the slightest and certainly didn't fawn over us.

RobertKK

My parents weren't fussed as they knew my sister and myself did our best and that was enough.
The only pressure came from ourselves.

Earthhorse

My parents made me study pretty hard in 5th and 6th Year and then when I got my Leaving Cert results didn't even say well done.

Not bad people but I thought that was pretty sh*tty of them.

jeremymurphy

Glico Man wrote: »

My parents had a strange approach to me doing my Leaving Cert. While I was studying they were normal and didn't tip toe around me. Then, it all changed, as they decided to separate the morning of my first exam. Made things a little tough to concentrate for that and the rest :pac:

Did that actually happen?

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

I'd say they were kind of worried about the lack of work I was putting in, but at that point they'd learned that pressuring me to do anything just made me dig my heels in. My dad was the first in his family to even do the Leaving, and my mam never got to go to college (because of me!) so not going to college just was not on the table, but beyond that I never felt any pressure. I was one of those kids who's well cut out to do well in the Leaving and I knew I only wanted to do arts so I really didn't bother my arse that much studying.

They were bloody brilliant in hindsight, though I spent most of the year (and the preceding three years) thinking their mission in life was to piss me off for kicks.

One eyed Jack

My parents were very academic themselves, passionate about education, and with seven children we were all very competitive with each other, and it was always a pressure environment at home when it came to education and excelling in school. I had moved out of home when I did my leaving cert, but I remember after my junior cert when I told them I wanted to apply to the army, they weren't too happy about it.

With my own child now I keep up with what he's doing in school and I do push him hard, but he's well able for it. I try to balance it out though by making sure he has broader interests than pure academia. I think it's important too for his education that he isn't just restricting himself to the curriculum, but explores subjects thoroughly to get a broader understanding of how various concepts relate to each other, which helps him have a more informed perspective.

Chain Smoker

My dad didn't see what the big deal was at all to the point that, when my younger brother told him to f*ck off after trying to wake him up for "school" (leaving cert engineering exam day), he figured he needed the rest cos he was the night before studying and let him have the day off.

tomwaterford

Mine were pure delighted I made it to the leaving cert....and even though I did practically no study for it (2 weeks supervised study in school saved me )they didn't try to force me/get onto me atal

**even though I filled in cao it was unlikely I'd go to college...had a job/apprenticeship lined up with 6 weeks so had no pressure atal

lazeedaisy

Mine did not know what was involved, youngest of 5, only one to stay on, no help, no guidance, nothing.

Just got on with it, mind you it was 30 plus years ago.....

ElleEm

I kind of wish my parents pushed me more. I didn't do too badly, but they just let me get on with it. They mentioned studying but I was out galavanting the whole time. They really should have grounded me to keep me in! I went onto third level and have a great job so it didn't hold me back but I will always have a twinge of regret for not doing better.

jam_mac_jam

Oh no...i took annual leave when my son was doing exams...made him nice lunches and wanted to be around. Does that make me a bad person. Its lovely to have a week off lazing around in your house anyway

I think it's really important that parents take an interest in their children's education while keeping the balance on the side of encouragement rather than pushiness. At the end of the day an individual is more than the sum of his/her leaving cert points and I think that can get a little lost during that stage of life.

For me personally I place huge value on education but not just a formal, academic one. If I ever have children I will spend time giving them experiences and allowing them to explore their environment. Run in the fields, go camping, attend festivals, just have a broader reach than the usual.

jam_mac_jam

jam_mac_jam wrote: »

Oh no...i took annual leave when my son was doing exams...made him nice lunches and wanted to be around. Does that make me a bad person. Its lovely to have a week off lazing around in your house anyway

That is exactly what I plan to do this year when my eldest sits the leaving. Have booked a week off work already and may take other odd days. And I will do the same for his brother the following year. I don't think its fawning over, I think its just lending the extra bit of support.

My parents were supportive. My mum never had a job and always stayed home so it was great to come home at lunchtime between exams and have her to chat to. As I have always worked I feel I need to do this for my boys.

Earthhorse

Earthhorse wrote: »

My parents made me study pretty hard in 5th and 6th Year and then when I got my Leaving Cert results didn't even say well done.

Not bad people but I thought that was pretty sh*tty of them.

That is pretty tough tbh.

My parents and their siblings on both sides were all well educated and all went to university, even my grand parents on one side were well educated so my parents placed a lot of importance in education also and encouraged me and helped me anyway they could to do my best. Be it just encouraging me or things like paying and driving me to grinds etc. They wouldn't be taking time off around the exams etc (I drove myself to my exams) but they were very interested in mine and my siblings education and I'm very glad of it as I needed to be pushed to put in effort back then.

Agricola

My Dad only did national school education and my mother got the Leaving. My mother took an interest but let me get on with it. My father didnt know the junior from the leaving cert and if I had stayed in school til I was 23 he would have probably thought that was just the done thing nowadays!

Earthhorse

Candie wrote: »

That is pretty tough tbh.

I'm a pretty tough guy.

Or a tough, pretty guy. I forget which.

Azalea

mariaalice wrote: »

Only catching up with last weekends papers now, there was an interesting article by Diarmaid Ferriter about third level students.

When you did your leaving cert did you have parents who barley knew you were doing the leaving cert and you just had to get on with it.

or did you have

The modern phenomena of parents booking annul leave around the child's leaving cert so they are there to support them, parents who knew everything about the leaving cert, had grinds, and were manoeuvred, helped, supported in every way by parents.

Only one or the other? What about the in between?

My parents encouraged me to do well, then got pissed off at me lazing around and wasting my potential, and were so over the moon when I got into university (especially my mother, who didn't go to college; my dad did, via scholarship, so he couldn't relate to not working hard and not appreciating education). Like another poster, my dad was a maths whizz and gave me grinds, which were great in fairness. But at college I was a total dosser too though. So I dropped out for a bit (which disappointed them but they admitted it had to be up to me) and went working; after a while I envied the student life, went back and got my honours degree and masters. Loved it and was delighted of how proud I made them! (Finally ).

Lia_lia

My Father lives in another country, can't even remember speaking to him about my LC actually! My Mother wasn't too bothered. She just wanted to make sure I did okay and got what I wanted. I actually used to wish my parents were a bit more pushy when it came to education. My friends had extremely pushy parents who sent them to grinds etc..

Pherekydes

I left school before the LC and my parents were happy for me to start contributing financially to the household.

That was way back. Like when you could get an apprenticeship without first having 600pts in the LC and a first class honours degree.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

lc180

Oranage2 wrote: »

And what type of job do you have if you don't mind me asking ?

Software Developer Extraordinaire

8 Bit Girl

I was 7th in line to do it, and considering we are all nearly a year apart in age, it barely registered with them.

Ruu

I was looked upon as the last hope in our family (even with a younger brother) to go to college, no pressure like! They were nice and supported me but trusted me to make my own decisions on if I should stay in or go out for the night. I never heard of anyone taking leave.

whatismyname

I had no parents. Boohoo

Stheno

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

Same here, I was one of those weird advanced kids in reading at a young age, but my parents were mega strict, used to get told off for reading after lights out.

When time came for college, I'd a choice between a scholarship to train as an accountant, or to go to college and chose to go to college.

Didn't get much support from my parents tbh, worked part time from when I was sixteen and I remember my maths exam from my leaving as being a horror, and my mother just not getting it.

As a college student, I failed, I was so reliant on my almost photo graphic memory to get through the leaving that I was rubbish at continual learning, and dropped out.

I'm now about to submit a dissertation for a Masters which I'm relatively proud of though

I was the last of two boys and two girls to do A-levels, but there's a big age gap between me and my closest sibling so it was like the first time again for my folks. All my siblings were either finished in uni or were post grads, there was never a question of me not going to university.

I didn't think of it as pressure though, just a minimum expectation to live up to my potential as my parents saw it.

JupiterKid

My dad supported me but didn't make a big fuss of me doing the Leaving. I got on just fine.

Tom_Barry

They were supportive but not pushy. They just genuinely wanted me to do well and have a good life.. as long as I done as well as I wanted they were happy!

pkvader

Both my parents left school at a very young age,so they wanted me to do well without being pushy.I was an average student,by the time 5th/6th year came around my mum thought if you studied 60 hours a week you could become a doctor, I exploded on her one night,I wasn't going to live in my room slaving over books,I did a few hours study every night, did grand in my leaving,parents were happy.Like I said I was very average,all the study in the world wasn't going to turn me into an academic wonder.

To this day (18 years later) my mother still bugs me when she says I could have went to college,my results were no where near good enough to get a decent course.To be fair she hadn't a clue,she thought once you went to college you were going to be sorted for life and walk into any job.

Things worked out fine for me,I was always a hard reliable worker, even as a teen in part time jobs,I'm not in an amazing job now,but it's not bad either,but I'm very happy.

The Backwards Man

Mine weren't at all pushy, but they'd always had the attitude that there's no point in doing something if you're not going to do your best to do it right, so I suppose that was my motivation.

Dirty Dingus McGee

What support would you need from your parents for the leaving cert.Their nt going to do the exam for you.

The buses still go into school so it's pretty much like a normal school week and frankly having a quiet house to study in where your parents are at work is by far the best support you could get not having them waste their annual leave to "support" you.

Any parent that takes time of work to "support" their children during their exams is a pure gobsh1te.

Tom_Barry

They also told me I'd end up working in the sewing factory sewing knickers for old women if I didn't do well in my leaving. I suppose that was probably one of my motivations for doing well.