Commuting getting me down

Struggling

I'm currently commuting from down the country to work in Dublin. I'm up at 5.30 every morning and not home until at least 8. I've viewed apartments. Most recently a perfect apartment. I was in early with my references and had hoped I had finally found somewhere. Nice area, within budget and good access to commute to work. I followed up with the letting agent who didn't answer any of my emails or phone calls. Left voicemails and nothing. Then I seen on their website the apartment was gone. I know its competitive in Dublin right now but its just getting me so down. I'm tired all the time, miserable and just don't know what to do. I returned from living abroad because I wanted to get sorted in Dublin where I had friends. Now I'm having regrets about coming back. I know its not as big a problem as most on Here and I know that's the problem with Dublin and renting but I'm just miserable all the time with my situation. I don't know what to do why is everything so difficult

myshirt

Are you driving?

Maybe you might consider switching to the train or bus?

What you are doing is no doubt tough - keep the body fueled well. Setting aside the supply issue, it is a battle of the generations unfortunately. Those principally over 45 are the ones who benefited from government overborrowing through reduced taxes and favorable economics; including what remains vastly, vastly overpayed public servants; you are the one who has to pay it back.

Keep the faith. With the right movement from your generation, those principally over 45 can be sorted out to redress the balance. Need to be taxed and cut very heavily. It's not right that you have to commute that much, or work to put the bulk of your wages into an older persons pocket who really never, ever should have got into that position but for the favorable econonics funded by borrowing you pay back.

Tough it out til election time.

Struggling

I drive because its cheaper. I carpool so its cheaper. However the money isn't the big concern its how miserable I'm feeling about the whole situation

myshirt

Struggling wrote: »

I drive because its cheaper. I carpool so its cheaper. However the money isn't the big concern its how miserable I'm feeling about the whole situation

Well that is good, that assists. Do you share the driving?
What I would say to you is that it is not 100% the fact that the situation is bad, but moreso the angle you are looking at it from. Write down 20 positive things about your life and about you. This could be considerably worse if you were driving by yourself, and to a bad job. I think it is great to hear from you that you have a job and are making this committment, and making the commitment in the face of a strong need to come down on the generation ahead of you (tax them; cut their wages etc), it is very admirable.

Stick with it, and know that it is giving you experience. When times get better, you will find a standard much easier than you normally would. You have a lot of courage and strength and should be proud!

TheBeach

Would you consider staying in a hotel / guest house for a couple of nights mid week, as a short term solution until you find suitable long term accommodation?

mfceiling

Closer commuter town? Naas, drogheda, Ashbourne, dunshaughlin, bray?

Gongoozler

Would you not consider getting a room in a place for now and then get an apartment in a while?

Teafor two12345

Mr Tea was in the same position for a bit before we married. All I can say is if you hang in there then this will sort itself out eventually. Do what you can to make it comfortable now etc.

If you have friends in Dub could so you stay with them for a bit?

If it's the emotional aspect of how it affects you try things like music in the car etc.

Honestly it sounds as if this is the type of situation that will eventually sort itself out with you finding a place.

So it's cheering UP you need. :-) In the car etc. Does your car have a name? Name her!

dafunk

I feel for you. That's tough. Would you consider putting an ad on daft.ie yourself saying you're looking for something? I don't live in Dublin but when I'm looking for a housemate I browse daft to pick people as opposed to advertising myself. The renting situation in Dublin seems horrendous at the moment but you just need patience and you'll get something. If you weren't commuting it would probably be quicker to find somewhere. Would you consider digs / renting a room from a family for a few weeks so you would have more time for house hunting?

Re myshirt...what sort of nonsense are you gibbering about and how are you in any way giving OP any useful advice?

Struggling

Sharing driving isn't an option as the person I commute with doesn't drive. We could get a room somewhere but really we want to keep the money to furnish and rent a place when we get somewhere I just dunno how much longer I can do the commute. I'm exhausted and worn out all the time. Work give me a hard time about leaving at 5.30 even though that's my contracted hours. But when I leave later it means I'm home and straight to bed. I'm usually asleep at 9/10 in order to be up after 5.

Struggling

Moving to a commuter town isn't an option as its not what we want and means we still face a commute as well as rent. We moved home from abroad to live in Dublin and I'm just so full of regret about it all

listermint

OP this is a short term problem.

People move everyday your luck will change .

The only advice I can give is to stick at it and as suggested put up a wanted ad.

You may also adjust your choices of location to expedite the search.

You may be going through some 'holiday' blues due to the return.but it is short term you will get a place and everything will look different

Struggling

listermint wrote: »

OP this is a short term problem.

People move everyday your luck will change .

The only advice I can give is to stick at it and as suggested put up a wanted ad.

You may also adjust your choices of location to expedite the search.

You may be going through some 'holiday' blues due to the return.but it is short term you will get a place and everything will look different

Agree it is short term. Feels forever now as we have been commuting for a few months. Its hard living back at your parents house after been living away and happy for two years. A lot of my frustration comes from finding an apartment and someone else swiping it up over us when we need it more. Though I know letting agents dont care who needs it most they just care about money.

listermint

Struggling wrote: »

Agree it is short term. Feels forever now as we have been commuting for a few months. Its hard living back at your parents house after been living away and happy for two years. A lot of my frustration comes from finding an apartment and someone else swiping it up over us when we need it more. Though I know letting agents dont care who needs it most they just care about money.

Well I don't think you need it more. Everyone is looking for accommodation you don't know other peoples situation.

I would widen the scope you may actually be hindering yourself by looking for the elusive place a few minutes from the office when in fsvr there is a perfectly acceptable place on a bus or LUAS journey .

You have to be pragmatic and this will finish sooner than later.

Struggling

Have been looking in all areas of Dublin. As we work in opposite sides of the city finding somewhere accessible for us both is difficult when we viewed the recent apartment it had transport for us both. And was in a lovely location.
Though I know this will end it's just had to see an end now as there is so much competition in Dublin and places are snapped up straight away

listermint

Well when viewing bring a deposit.bring all references come dressed well and be courteous.

The best tenant to fulfil that first wins out

Saipanne

Struggling wrote: »

Have been looking in all areas of Dublin. As we work in opposite sides of the city finding somewhere accessible for us both is difficult when we viewed the recent apartment it had transport for us both. And was in a lovely location.
Though I know this will end it's just had to see an end now as there is so much competition in Dublin and places are snapped up straight away

When you view a place, offer a little more rent than advertised?

Penny Tration

I feel for you. I also have a long commute. I'm up for work at 5.30am and get home anywhere between 8-9.30pm. Coming up to Christmas shifts will increase so I'll be up at half five and home at about half ten at night.

How long have you been doing it? Because tbh, the first 3-6 months were hell for me. I was exhausted all of the time and didn't see my friends, family or boyfriend much.

A year on, I'm totally used to it. I've gotten used to six hours of sleep and function fine on it (and I'm not a caffeine junkie, I just have one coffee a day!).

Your body adjusts and in time it'll get much easier.

However, if it's making you that miserable, you need to plan to move. When you go to viewings, have a deposit in your pocket. Be willing to offer more than the asking price.

And consider moving to a commuter town. trust me, if your commute is cut to an hour each way, it'll feel like heaven compared to now! Yes, you'll still pay commuting costs, but not as much as before and tbh, the positive impact on your emotional well-being will be well worth any financial loss.

Struggling

Been doing it three months. Unfortunately I'm not in a position financially to be willingly offering more rent. And honestly I think landlords are getting enough in Dublin.
Being back living at home is the number one frustration for me.
I think our age goes against us too. We are in our 20s so I'm worried a landlord might think we would be party people which we are certainly not

desertcircus

I know you're wary of considering places a little further out as they still mean a commute, but by the sounds of your posts it's not the commute itself but the distance that's getting to you (and if you're leaving work at 5:30 and not getting home till eight, that's not a surprise). At the moment, you're having serious difficulty finding a place that matches all your criteria, and the status quo is leaving you exhausted and miserable. You're stuck in a place that's almost the worst possible option, and you're trying to find a place that's the best possible option, without considering that there's a lot of room for significant improvement in your quality of life if you look at the less-than-perfect range.

I'd suggest considering one of two changes of tack:

1. Decide to move to somewhere that's not quite ideal, but drastically reduces your commute, for a year. If you're currently looking at Smithfield and finding it incredibly difficult, then look at Inchicore. If you're looking at Inchicore, think about Adamstown. You'll still have a commute, but it'll be far shorter and simpler, and after the year is up, you can continue living there under a part 4 tenancy while you resume your search for the ideal place. The problem for you is not that you have a commute: it's that you have an absolutely massive commute. A half-hour (or even one-hour) commute is worth fifteen to twenty hours a week of your time in terms of savings compared to your current situation; that's an entire extra waking day. Deciding to take the imperfect option for a year removes the bulk of the stress from your life straight away, and if you still want to find the perfect place in a year's time you'll have a much less stressful and urgent search.

2. This one is a bit more drastic, but it's one I switched to about six years ago: consider cycling to work. For a healthy adult living in Dublin and owning a road bike, anything under seven kilometres is less than half an hour away (and can be a great deal less depending on the route and the cyclist's fitness). I lived in Cabinteely and commuted the twelve kilometres to work each day for three years: it was between 30 and 40 minutes every day, compared to at least an hour (and frequently more) on a bus using a dedicated bus lane almost the whole way. If you make the decision to cycle, it opens up huge swathes of the city as an option. On top of that, it's a chance to get plenty of exercise in without losing a minute of your leisure time, and cycling to work leaves you wide awake and ready to go the moment you get to your desk compared to the stupefying effect of sitting in traffic in a bus or car. Becoming a cyclist commuter radically changes the number of areas you can consider as possible places to live.

Struggling

desertcircus wrote: »

I know you're wary of considering places a little further out as they still mean a commute, but by the sounds of your posts it's not the commute itself but the distance that's getting to you (and if you're leaving work at 5:30 and not getting home till eight, that's not a surprise). At the moment, you're having serious difficulty finding a place that matches all your criteria, and the status quo is leaving you exhausted and miserable. You're stuck in a place that's almost the worst possible option, and you're trying to find a place that's the best possible option, without considering that there's a lot of room for significant improvement in your quality of life if you look at the less-than-perfect range.

I'd suggest considering one of two changes of tack:

1. Decide to move to somewhere that's not quite ideal, but drastically reduces your commute, for a year. If you're currently looking at Smithfield and finding it incredibly difficult, then look at Inchicore. If you're looking at Inchicore, think about Adamstown. You'll still have a commute, but it'll be far shorter and simpler, and after the year is up, you can continue living there under a part 4 tenancy while you resume your search for the ideal place. The problem for you is not that you have a commute: it's that you have an absolutely massive commute. A half-hour (or even one-hour) commute is worth fifteen to twenty hours a week of your time in terms of savings compared to your current situation; that's an entire extra waking day. Deciding to take the imperfect option for a year removes the bulk of the stress from your life straight away, and if you still want to find the perfect place in a year's time you'll have a much less stressful and urgent search.

2. This one is a bit more drastic, but it's one I switched to about six years ago: consider cycling to work. For a healthy adult living in Dublin and owning a road bike, anything under seven kilometres is less than half an hour away (and can be a great deal less depending on the route and the cyclist's fitness). I lived in Cabinteely and commuted the twelve kilometres to work each day for three years: it was between 30 and 40 minutes every day, compared to at least an hour (and frequently more) on a bus using a dedicated bus lane almost the whole way. If you make the decision to cycle, it opens up huge swathes of the city as an option. On top of that, it's a chance to get plenty of exercise in without losing a minute of your leisure time, and cycling to work leaves you wide awake and ready to go the moment you get to your desk compared to the stupefying effect of sitting in traffic in a bus or car. Becoming a cyclist commuter radically changes the number of areas you can consider as possible places to live.

Cycling is definetly my plan as the red line luas is not the most fun
We had been looking at outside areas like sandyford, clondalkin but viewed a place in ashtown which was perfect and meant a quick trip on the train and when that fell through I think its what made me feel it was all going no where.
As I'm working in ranalagh and my partner is in clontarf its hard to find a happy medium.
I guess post "living abroad" blues are part of it too. We had it all really handy when we were living in Australia and now we are back and making less money, facing commutes, its dark going to work and coming home.

Saipanne

Struggling wrote: »

Cycling is definetly my plan as the red line luas is not the most fun
We had been looking at outside areas like sandyford, clondalkin but viewed a place in ashtown which was perfect and meant a quick trip on the train and when that fell through I think its what made me feel it was all going no where.
As I'm working in ranalagh and my partner is in clontarf its hard to find a happy medium.
I guess post "living abroad" blues are part of it too. We had it all really handy when we were living in Australia and now we are back and making less money, facing commutes, its dark going to work and coming home.

Could you both live in Dublin, but not together for a year?

Struggling

Saipanne wrote: »

Could you both live in Dublin, but not together for a year?

Were together 12 years we really don't wanna live seperatly. Though it would be a good option if we weren't a coupel

Saipanne

Struggling wrote: »

Were together 12 years we really don't wanna live seperatly. Though it would be a good option if we weren't a coupel

"Strugglers can't be choosers"?

I don't know what you want us to say here? You've gotten some good advice here, but you seem to dismiss most options.

You seem to have established that you can't get the perfect apartment that gives you easy access to Ranelagh and Clontarf and allows you to live together, under a tight budget.

Ergo, something has to give.

Struggling

Saipanne wrote: »

"Strugglers can't be choosers"?

I don't know what you want us to say here? You've gotten some good advice here, but you seem to dismiss most options.

You seem to have established that you can't get the perfect apartment that gives you easy access to Ranelagh and Clontarf and allows you to live together, under a tight budget.

Ergo, something has to give.

I'm not dismissing any of it but a couple living apart wouldn't be anyone's option.

Just hearing I'm not the only one in a similar boat makes me feel better and looking further outside the city is definetly something I will consider. I don't know if my partner will though. He's set on being in the city.

Also considering moving back abroad in the new year if things don't get resolved soon will be something I will look at which is a shame

Saipanne

Struggling wrote: »

I'm not dismissing any of it but a couple living apart wouldn't be anyone's option.

Just hearing I'm not the only one in a similar boat makes me feel better and looking further outside the city is definetly something I will consider. I don't know if my partner will though. He's set on being in the city.

Also considering moving back abroad in the new year if things don't get resolved soon will be something I will look at which is a shame

Have you looked at East Wall? Access to both workplaces is possible from there and it is relatively cheap.

Struggling

Saipanne wrote: »

Have you looked at East Wall? Access to both workplaces is possible from there and it is relatively cheap.

Will definetly keep a better eye on east wall. Have daft.ie notifications set up for anything in the city centre. Though many don't reply or are snapped up immediately

Saipanne

Ringsend wouldn't be a bad option either, but more expensive.

dori_dormer

Your partner should look at learning to drive. You'd have more options if only one of you needed to drive and the other could take public transport.

listermint

http://www.rent.ie/houses-to-let/2-Finn-Street-Stoneybatter-Dublin-7-North-Dublin-City/1602718/


Job done.

listermint

sashafierce wrote: »

Its not as simple as that. There's been plenty of apartments we have sent in references for. We have good references but we weren't picked

As simple as what?

Giving the OP ideas ...


I've already advised on deposit references and dresscode

Anything constructive to add?

afkasurfjunkie

You say ye are together 12 years, ye are reliable tenants that won't be partying all the time. Why is it so necessary to be living and spending your hard earned wages living IN dublin? Why not somewhere a little further out where the commute won't be as long and the time you gain can be spent together?

strandroad

You really need to be viewing a lot and making offers on a lot before you get something. It's a numbers game - there's plenty of people in your situation!