Weekday Weddings

The Sidewards Man

I'm getting fairly fed up with them anyway, having to take time off work min 1 day and potentially 3. Fine for the bride and groom to be getting cheaper rates during the week instead of having a Saturday wedding which should be the only day of the week marriage should be allowed.
Sure I might give a reduced wedding gift tomorrow since they are getting a cheaper wedding, swings and roundabouts.

Nib

Has there ever been a "The Forwards Man"?

Toots

The Sidewards Man wrote: »

I'm getting fairly fed up with them anyway, having to take time off work min 1 day and potentially 3. Fine for the bride and groom to be getting cheaper rates during the week instead of having a Saturday wedding which should be the only day of the week marriage should be allowed.
Sure I might give a reduced wedding gift tomorrow since they are getting a cheaper wedding, swings and roundabouts.

If you want a civil ceremony, you don't have a choice other than weekdays - the registry office and staff are only there Monday to Friday.

edit: also just to add, the vast majority of hotels are the same price for a Friday or a Saturday wedding. If it was Mon-Wed then it'd be cheaper.

Munstermissy

You know that small card with the invite, an rsvp, gives you an option to say no��

Canadel

You only have to attend same sex weddings you're invited to since the referendum Op, you can still decline normal ones.

jamesbere

Just don't go, if the time doesn't suit you then you can't do anything about it unless it's family or a close friend.

Menas

Kneemos was well ahead of you on this one OP.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=95999016

Sunnyisland

I used to love going to weddings, the build up the drinking the music the dancing the food, it was a great day out.

Buona Fortuna

The Sidewards Man wrote: »

I'm getting fairly fed up with them anyway, having to take time off work min 1 day and potentially 3. Fine for the bride and groom to be getting cheaper rates during the week instead of having a Saturday wedding which should be the only day of the week marriage should be allowed.
Sure I might give a reduced wedding gift tomorrow since they are getting a cheaper wedding, swings and roundabouts.

I'd take them over the

"We're getting married in Tierra del Fuego next week, we'd love you to come"

keithclancy

The Sidewards Man wrote: »

I'm getting fairly fed up with them anyway, having to take time off work min 1 day and potentially 3. Fine for the bride and groom to be getting cheaper rates during the week instead of having a Saturday wedding which should be the only day of the week marriage should be allowed.
Sure I might give a reduced wedding gift tomorrow since they are getting a cheaper wedding, swings and roundabouts.

Christ almighty, what a whinge bag.

Why not just scrawl "not going on weekday" on the invitation and send it back. :pac:

Sam Kade

How would a wedding invitation midweek mean you have to take 3 days off?

Sunnyisland

If anybody is getting marraid in the Algarve or Andalusia Spain please feel free to invite me, thanks.

Mr Freeze

Ya I just wouldn't go if it meant taking time of work, unless it was a close friend of family member.

bucketybuck

Buona Fortuna wrote: »

I'd take them over the

"We're getting married in Tierra del Fuego next week, we'd love you to come"

People dragging their families and friends overseas for stags and weddings need a good ****ing slap in the head, its such an incredibly selfish thing to do.

keithclancy

bucketybuck wrote: »

People dragging their families and friends overseas for stags and weddings need a good ****ing slap in the head, its such an incredibly selfish thing to do.

I'd be the opposite, planning your wedding around what family and friends want is a stupid thing to do.

You should just do what you want and people can come if they want to or not.

You'll only do it once (hopefully) may as well do it how you want it, after all your getting married to each other and not other people.

yourdeadwright

I already had one wedding in Croatia this year and then one in Detroit a month apart, pain in the hoop before but I had an absolute ball at both,
I didn't really have a choice one was my brothers and the other one I was asked to be best man from my best mate so kinda felt I had to go,
You only live once,so as much as the thought of paying the money killed me I don't think in the long run i'll ever regret going but probably would regret if I didn't

bucketybuck

keithclancy wrote: »

You should just do what you want and people can come if they want to or not.

That sure is a nice thought indeed, but the reality is that little thing called obligation. You know damn well that there are a lot of people who will feel that they don't have any choice but to go, and you know damn well that there will also be a lot of people who will bitch and moan and feel insulted if certain people don't go to their wedding when invited.

Just look at the next post for example...

yourdeadwright wrote: »

I didn't really have a choice one was my brothers and the other one I was asked to be best man from my best mate so kinda felt I had to go,

What a nice choice to have, pay thousands of euro or miss your brother and best friends weddings. Ah sure, he didn't have to go if he didn't want to. :rolleyes: I'm sure there would never be any hard feelings for telling your brother and best friend you don't want to go to their weddings. :rolleyes:

Heres a strange alternative. Its just a glorified party, stop dragging people all over the ****ing globe for your little shindig. If you want to go off alone then do that, but stop forcing obligations on everybody else.

keithclancy

bucketybuck wrote: »

That sure is a nice thought indeed, but the reality is that little thing called obligation. You know damn well that there are a lot of people who will feel that they don't have any choice but to go, and you know damn well that there will also be a lot of people who will bitch and moan and feel insulted if certain people don't go to their wedding when invited.

In the end I'd prefer to have someone a bit upset they weren't invited or it was a situation where they couldn't go rather than go out of my way financially or changing what we wanted to suit other people.

Getting upset over these things is their own problem.

Or just say you can't afford it ... what's the big deal ?

somesoldiers

if it's not on a Vera Wang invite I wouldn't go anyway

“Even the invites are troubling me.

"I found this company - they are the only company in Ireland that do Vera Wang invites. I just had to have them and obviously they come at a cost. And that is the other snag. Everything is money, money, money. Anything I like always seems to be really expensive. I obviously have really expensive taste,” she joked.

refuse to post link, Google expose vera wang if so inclined, 2nd one down

Richard Hillman

In regards to the RSVP: Are the Wedding hosts not secretly delighted when non-essential guests cant come?

Firstly its cheaper if less guests come and then you don't want to inconvenience people. Everybody has been inconvenienced by weddings where you were not exactly close to the couple. The couple would have been in the same boat too at some stage.

bucketybuck

keithclancy wrote: »

In the end I'd prefer to have someone a bit upset they weren't invited or it was a situation where they couldn't go rather than go out of my way financially or changing what we wanted to suit other people.

Getting upset over these things is their own problem.

Or just say you can't afford it ... what's the big deal ?

Yeah, thats what I said the first time, selfish.

jamesbere

bucketybuck wrote: »

That sure is a nice thought indeed, but the reality is that little thing called obligation. You know damn well that there are a lot of people who will feel that they don't have any choice but to go, and you know damn well that there will also be a lot of people who will bitch and moan and feel insulted if certain people don't go to their wedding when invited.

Just look at the next post for example...


What a nice choice to have, pay thousands of euro or miss your brother and best friends weddings. Ah sure, he didn't have to go if he didn't want to. :rolleyes: I'm sure there would never be any hard feelings for telling your brother and best friend you don't want to go to their weddings. :rolleyes:

Heres a strange alternative. Its just a glorified party, stop dragging people all over the ****ing globe for your little shindig. If you want to go off alone then do that, but stop forcing obligations on everybody else.

Going out to another country for a wedding shouldn't cost thousands, if the couple getting married organise in good time and give plenty of notice it should be no problem.

Friend of mine got married in Germany last year but they gave us plenty of notice so I got flights and accommodation for next to nothing.

keithclancy

bucketybuck wrote: »

Yeah, thats what I said the first time, selfish.

There's two people in a Marriage.

Look up the term selfish and get back to me.

bucketybuck

keithclancy wrote: »

Look up the term selfish and get back to me.

selfish
adjective
(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for other people; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.

keithclancy wrote: »

In the end I'd prefer to have someone a bit upset they weren't invited or it was a situation where they couldn't go rather than go out of my way financially or changing what we wanted to suit other people.

Seems clear to me.

A wedding invitation is just that, an invitation. Not an order or demand. You have the right to say NO. Last 2 weekday weddings we were invited to, I went to church and went home and collected OH for Reception. Others did the same!

topper75

realies wrote: »

I used to love going to weddings, the build up the drinking the music the dancing the food, it was a great day out.

AND - in return, all you have to do is go to the ATM and withdraw a few new crisp notes to put in the €5 bit of cardboard with the pretty picture on it. It's a steal - I'll take the deal.

bucketybuck

Deleted User wrote: »

A wedding invitation is just that, an invitation. Not an order or demand. You have the right to say NO. Last 2 weekday weddings we were invited to, I went to church and went home and collected OH for Reception. Others did the same!

Again thats just naive, there are plenty of examples of people who have little choice but to say yes.

bucketybuck

bucketybuck wrote: »

Again thats just naive, there are plenty of examples of people who have little choice but to say yes.

Of course you have a choice. Why go to the Wedding of a stranger? Immediate family and close friends only.

keithclancy

bucketybuck wrote: »

Again thats just naive, there are plenty of examples of people who have little choice but to say yes.

I can think of two notable examples,

One where they invited everyone they where expected too, chose food on the basis that the older people might not like 'fancy' food, they booked rooms for the older members in the family and arranged lifts, went out of their way to look after everyone.

They got married in a church by a priest even though they hadn't stepped foot in a church since they were in school.

In the end everyone still complained about things, people asked why they were in a smaller room than someone else, people complained about seating arrangements.

The couple ended up with around 20k of debt after the wedding because their costs and choices were driven by other people.

The other example is a couple that had a wedding, arranged everything how they wanted, invited people they had only seen in the past 5 years (friends/family) and left everyone look after everything.

They got married in the hotel because they thought getting married in a church wasn't necessary

They had no debt in the end because their costs were dictated by what they wanted and they were able to budget accordingly.

The amount of complaining in both cases was the same, doesn't matter how much effort you put in.

The wedding is for you, if you piss people off, don't worry they'll get over it and probably won't even be able to remember in a few years if they were there or not.

JustTheOne

keithclancy wrote: »

I can think of two notable examples,

One where they invited everyone they where expected too, chose food on the basis that the older people might not like 'fancy' food, they booked rooms for the older members in the family and arranged lifts, went out of their way to look after everyone.

They got married in a church by a priest even though they hadn't stepped foot in a church since they were in school.

In the end everyone still complained about things, people asked why they were in a smaller room than someone else, people complained about seating arrangements.

The couple ended up with around 20k of debt after the wedding because their costs and choices were driven by other people.

The other example is a couple that had a wedding, arranged everything how they wanted, invited people they had only seen in the past 5 years (friends/family) and left everyone look after everything.

They got married in the hotel because they thought getting married in a church wasn't necessary

They had no debt in the end because their costs were dictated by what they wanted and they were able to budget accordingly.

The amount of complaining in both cases was the same, doesn't matter how much effort you put in.

The wedding is for you, if you piss people off, don't worry they'll get over it and probably won't even be able to remember in a few years if they were there or not.

Yeah. Stick it to the man!!!

namloc1980

Weekday weddings are a pain. Usually decline them. Also I rarely go to the Day 2 event which these days is becoming as big if not bigger than the actual wedding reception. Where did this trend come from?

MistyCheese

Weekday weddings will most likely put paid to big 200+ people shindigs.

bucketybuck

keithclancy wrote: »

I can think of two notable examples,

One where they invited everyone they where expected too, chose food on the basis that the older people might not like 'fancy' food, they booked rooms for the older members in the family and arranged lifts, went out of their way to look after everyone.

They got married in a church by a priest even though they hadn't stepped foot in a church since they were in school.

In the end everyone still complained about things, people asked why they were in a smaller room than someone else, people complained about seating arrangements.

The couple ended up with around 20k of debt after the wedding because their costs and choices were driven by other people.

The other example is a couple that had a wedding, arranged everything how they wanted, invited people they had only seen in the past 5 years (friends/family) and left everyone look after everything.

They got married in the hotel because they thought getting married in a church wasn't necessary

They had no debt in the end because their costs were dictated by what they wanted and they were able to budget accordingly.

The amount of complaining in both cases was the same, doesn't matter how much effort you put in.

The wedding is for you, if you piss people off, don't worry they'll get over it and probably won't even be able to remember in a few years if they were there or not.

What on earth does any of that have to do with the utterly selfish act of dragging friends and family overseas for a wedding?

keithclancy

bucketybuck wrote: »

What on earth does any of that have to do with the utterly selfish act of dragging friends and family overseas for a wedding?

If they felt like they were being dragged somewhere they shouldn't go.

In my case anyway I live in the Netherlands, most of my friends are here, I have family in the US/UK/Ireland/Australia

Where exactly should I have gotten married to fit your criteria :P ?

martinedwards

yeah this is new.

I got married on a Thursday in 1992

Is some one can't come, Ah well, I KNEW that having a midweek wedding would be difficult for some folk.

Thats MY problem as the host and guests have the choice of coming or not.

we had folks who couldn't get time off work, but that was OUR fault for not waiting 3 years to get a Saturday.

Dirty Dingus McGee

bucketybuck wrote: »

What on earth does any of that have to do with the utterly selfish act of dragging friends and family overseas for a wedding?

Why did you have to go.

Just tell your family you don't want to go to the wedding as it costs too much and if they don't like that then **** them.

Would the couple really care about who turns up for their wedding?

If you ask me expecting someone to go to your wedding is incredibly narcissistic.

eviltwin

Well I got married on a Thursday so I guess there were some people who felt that way and I can understand that but as we had a civil wedding we didn't have an option of a weekend so we were kinda stuck in that regard. Its unfortunate when people can't make it but that's the thing with social events, you're not going to get full attendance unless you are really lucky. There are always reasons why people can't attend. I recently had to turn down an invite to an adult only wedding as I can't get a sitter but the couple understood, I certainly don't think they were selfish and I hope no one would think we were selfish for not having a weekend wedding.

I'm getting married on a Friday. I was thinking of having a third option on the rsvp for "can only attend evening only".

Least then people who wouldn't mind a Friday night out have the option of working that day. Otherwise, it's yes I'll be there or no I won't.

Honest question, is it a dumb idea?

_Kaiser_

Strawberry Milkshake wrote: »

I'm getting married on a Friday. I was thinking of having a third option on the rsvp for "can only attend evening only".

Least then people who wouldn't mind a Friday night out have the option of working that day. Otherwise, it's yes I'll be there or no I won't.

Honest question, is it a dumb idea?

Sounds like a good idea.. not everyone can get time off so giving them the option would be welcome to some I'm sure and still let you have them there.

Super-Rush

Strawberry Milkshake wrote: »

I'm getting married on a Friday. I was thinking of having a third option on the rsvp for "can only attend evening only".

Least then people who wouldn't mind a Friday night out have the option of working that day. Otherwise, it's yes I'll be there or no I won't.

Honest question, is it a dumb idea?

That's not a bad idea at all.

Tarzana2

Civil weddings can only happen on a weekday and with them becoming more and more common, I can see there being many more weekdays weddings in the future!

Never seen anyone I know get married any day other than Fri or sat (bar a wedding abroad with doesn't really count as everyone was over for the week anyway), with the majority being on Saturday. Doesn't really matter if it's a Friday or Saturday to me as far as days off as you take Friday off for the wedding if is Friday or you take Monday off if it's a Saturday wedding as you will have the Sunday pi*s up the following day. If probably prefer the Saturday wedding as I'd rather taking a Monday off than a Friday as the week always feels shorter then.

Love a good wedding myself, the second day is always good craic too (you would really miss it now when someone doesn't do it) and a good excuse to get on the sauce in the afternoon again!

Typer Monkey

Not everybody works 9-5 Monday to Friday you know!

rubadub

Toots wrote: »

If you want a civil ceremony, you don't have a choice other than weekdays - the registry office and staff are only there Monday to Friday..

Tarzana2 wrote: »

Civil weddings can only happen on a weekday

I was at a non-religious wedding on a sunday, not in a registry office. Dunno if it qualifies for your definition of civil wedding.

bucketybuck wrote: »

People dragging their families and friends overseas for stags and weddings need a good ****ing slap in the head, its such an incredibly selfish thing to do.

Stags abroad can end up cheaper. For some reason many feel the need to have stags in another county, so you can end up paying a fortune in taxis, trains and hotels etc.

Plane tickets to common stag destinations can be less than train tickets and once there the food & drink is often a lot cheaper.

Tarzana2

rubadub wrote: »

I was at a non-religious wedding on a sunday, not in a registry office. Dunno if it qualifies for your definition of civil wedding.

No, that would have been a humanist wedding.

rubadub wrote: »

Stags abroad can end up cheaper.

They likely won't be though, especially as Irish stags and hens are thankfully moving back to one night events again increasingly.

Salma Mushy Wallet wrote: »

the second day is always good craic too (you would really miss it now when someone doesn't do it) and a good excuse to get on the sauce in the afternoon again!

I wouldn't, I never attend second day events. Why would anyone want to go saucing hungover. Yuck.

Menas

Tarzana2 wrote: »

Why would anyone want to go saucing hungover. Yuck.

Hair of the dog!

Tarzana2

Menas wrote: »

Hair of the dog!

Ick.

rubadub

Tarzana2 wrote: »

No, that would have been a humanist wedding.

I never heard of this one being described as that, but there was one soon after which was. Reading this thread spiritualist rings a bell.

Either way there are non religious legally recognized weddings which happen at weekends, just in case anybody else thought that it was being said that it was not possible.

Tarzana2 wrote: »

They likely won't be though, especially as Irish stags and hens are thankfully moving back to one night events again increasingly.

Almost all I have been on were in another county, and so there was a need for a hotel. A single night abroad can still be cheaper.

I think it odd that this out of county thing is so popular. If the money blown on travel & accommodation was put towards the day events & food & drink I would probably have enjoyed them more.

Tarzana2

rubadub wrote: »

A single night abroad can still be cheaper.

It wouldn't be cheaper than a single night in Ireland. There are always more costs, both seen and unforeseen, when travelling abroad. People always try to sell foreign hens, stags and weddings as cheaper and they never are. Even if the single night in Ireland involves an overnight stay. And definitely a single night in Ireland that is local will be far cheaper.

Tarzana2

Tarzana2 wrote: »

I wouldn't, I never attend second day events. Why would anyone want to go saucing hungover. Yuck.

You can't beat the cure, going drinking the next day/evening after a night out wouldn't be just reserved for weddings would be a fairly regular occurrence.

Only one wedding recently where there wasn't a second night organised and I thought it made it a worse wedding weekend than when you all meet up again the second day for round two (few of us went on the beer ourselves anyway though starting at breakfast in the hotel :pac:)

Single night stags aren't half the craic of a weekend stag either, can't beat the second all day in the beer. I wouldn't be a fan of going abroad for one though much better to head off somewhere in ireland.

rubadub

Tarzana2 wrote: »

It wouldn't be cheaper than a single night in Ireland..

In both my posts I said "can be", yet you now seem 100% certain this is untrue, in bargain alerts there have been 20 euro flights to amsterdam as ryanair now go direct, a popular destination. The train setup in schipol is great, direct from the airport to slap in the middle of amsterdam. No need for taxis or hanging around for ages to get some connecting bus.

Tarzana2 wrote: »

There are always more costs, both seen and unforeseen, when travelling abroad.

There are also possible benefits. I picked up 6 litres of spirits in the airport in germany for a fraction of the price they would be here, even though I was paying duty on them. If you are a heavy drinker the savings on drink can be significant too.