Baptism for non infants children.

bt952000

Hi

We have never "got round" to getting our kids baptised and they are currently in an RC school, registered as RC.

Problem is Communion season is looming next year and , I guess, we have to get that sorted.

Probably in one hit to make it all easier.

Has anyone experience of getting non -infant children baptised and if there are other things to consider.

We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either, every now again ,Easter , Christmas , that kind of thing.

I don't even know who the parish priest is.

Kinda dreading the whole thing. As low key as possible. Do even the Godparents need to be there?

Cheers

Bored_lad

I'm sorry but you obviously don't have any sort of interest in your child being raised Roman Catholic so why bother just inform the school that your child won't be doing communion would this not be the easiest way to do things.

meathstevie

It's kind of hard to have a christening without godparents present. They're sort of essential accessories in the process. As for age, the Catholic Church will accept members of all ages from infant to geriatric.

Manach

It is a grand decision on your part as a start to engage within the wider Christian community. As for godparents, it would be advised to be part of the tradional custom and a way of honouring those choosen for the role. All the best on the day.

hinault

bt952000 wrote: »

Hi

We have never "got round" to getting our kids baptised and they are currently in an RC school, registered as RC.

Problem is Communion season is looming next year and , I guess, we have to get that sorted.

Probably in one hit to make it all easier.

Has anyone experience of getting non -infant children baptised and if there are other things to consider.

We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either, every now again ,Easter , Christmas , that kind of thing.

I don't even know who the parish priest is.

Kinda dreading the whole thing. As low key as possible. Do even the Godparents need to be there?

Cheers

Part of me says why bother? Why bother because from what you have posted you don't really believe in Catholicism.

The other part of me says that your child needs to get baptised as soon as possible, because whatever about you, your child deserves better.

Go to your local parish office. Explain the situation to them. The Parish office will make arrangements between you and the local priest. The priest will contact you to tell you what you need to do.

Do the right thing by the child and get him/her baptised asap.

eviltwin

Seeing you've got this far without the need for it why bother? Why not let your child make that decision themselves when they are old enough? If you've decided being a Catholic is important to you and your family that's one thing but doing it just so they can have the big day is insulting to the faith. Making promises that you have no plans to keep re your kids religious upbringing makes a joke of the entire thing.

bt952000

Thanks for all the comments.

All appreciated.

We certainly feel we should do it. I guess we have been putting it off like an ostrich burying it's head in the sand.

Just about doing it really. It's not that we ever didn't want to , just never did. More passive, not resistant.

Thanks for advise on contacting local parish office and inclusion of the Godparents.

Cheers

martinedwards

I'm with the why bother brigade.

YOU may have been born RC but you clearly aren't practising.

if the children want to explore their faith in later life then they can do the whole thing themselves later.

Standing up making vows that you will bring them up in the church just makes you a liar, and you are obviously switched on enough to ask the question, so I'm guessing that would be an issue for you.

let it go

Berserker

Well, OP, you can get christened at any age. I know adults who have been christened in a range of different churches. Why do you want to get them christened now? Do your children want to get baptised? I would follow the advice that others have given and go visit your local priest to discuss your wish to have your children baptised.

Mrs OBumble

The official answer should be that they need to go though a Rite of Christian Initiation in Childhood processs, that involves probably weekly faith-learning meetings for most of a year as well as regularly attending church.

It's quite possible that your parish priest won't actually bother with this, and will just let you go to one preparation session (1-2 hours) and then get the kids "done". But even so, he will be as aware as we are that you are mostly likely doing so the kids don't pester you about why they don't get communion money.

keano_afc

Baptism is a personal decision and from reading your posts you dont seem to have any interest in spiritual things so I would say whats the point?

If your children come to faith at a later age then baptism is what follows, as instructed in scripture.

ScumLord

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

It's quite possible that your parish priest won't actually bother with this,

Sure, tis the Catholic way.

katydid

bt952000 wrote: »

Hi

We have never "got round" to getting our kids baptised and they are currently in an RC school, registered as RC.

Problem is Communion season is looming next year and , I guess, we have to get that sorted.

Probably in one hit to make it all easier.

Has anyone experience of getting non -infant children baptised and if there are other things to consider.

We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either, every now again ,Easter , Christmas , that kind of thing.

I don't even know who the parish priest is.

Kinda dreading the whole thing. As low key as possible. Do even the Godparents need to be there?

Cheers

Why would you want them to make their communion if you haven't bothered getting them christened? I'm baffled.

gctest50

katydid wrote: »

Why would you want them to make their communion if you haven't bothered getting them christened? I'm baffled.

Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.

P_1

They're of an age now where to be honest it's not really your decision to make. If they want to get baptised, let them, if they don't then don't force it on them.

Mrs OBumble

katydid wrote: »

Why would you want them to make their communion if you haven't bothered getting them christened? I'm baffled.

Communion money. All the other kids will be getting it, the OP's kids will want it too.

georgieporgy

bt952000 wrote: »

Thanks for all the comments.

All appreciated.

We certainly feel we should do it. I guess we have been putting it off like an ostrich burying it's head in the sand.

Just about doing it really. It's not that we ever didn't want to , just never did. More passive, not resistant.

Thanks for advise on contacting local parish office and inclusion of the Godparents.

Cheers

Am I the only person who has read this post?
It's not unusual for young parents these days to be a bit late baptising their children. This is sometimes due to lack of knowledge of the Faith. Blame it on nonexistent catechetics.
Don't worry OP, you are doing the right thing and your local priest won't be shocked or surprised to see you coming.

keano_afc

georgieporgy wrote: »

Am I the only person who has read this post?
It's not unusual for young parents these days to be a bit late baptising their children. This is sometimes due to lack of knowledge of the Faith. Blame it on nonexistent catechetics.
Don't worry OP, you are doing the right thing and your local priest won't be shocked or surprised to see you coming.

But what if the kids dont want to get baptised? Baptism is an outward display of a personal decision to follow Christ. Why go through with it if they havent made that decision?

georgieporgy

keano_afc wrote: »

But what if the kids dont want to get baptised? Baptism is an outward display of a personal decision to follow Christ. Why go through with it if they havent made that decision?

What if the kids don't want to go to school or eat their broccoli?
I'm a dentist. I often have parents who drag screaming kids into my office (up all night with toothache) asking me to stick a needle in the kid's face and attack him with a pair of pliers. The kids usually say it's not their choice but heck, what do they know.

Keano, you're giving the protestant interpretation of baptism. I'm giving the catholic view (it's two different religions). And I understand the OP is catholic.

eviltwin

georgieporgy wrote: »

What if the kids don't want to go to school or eat their broccoli?
I'm a dentist. I often have parents who drag screaming kids into my office (up all night with toothache) asking me to stick a needle in the kid's face and attack him with a pair of pliers. The kids usually say it's not their choice but heck, what do they know.

Keano, you're giving the protestant interpretation of baptism. I'm giving the catholic view (it's two different religions). And I understand the OP is catholic.

Big difference between a health care issue and religion, come on!

keano_afc

georgieporgy wrote: »

What if the kids don't want to go to school or eat their broccoli?
I'm a dentist. I often have parents who drag screaming kids into my office (up all night with toothache) asking me to stick a needle in the kid's face and attack him with a pair of pliers. The kids usually say it's not their choice but heck, what do they know.

Keano, you're giving the protestant interpretation of baptism. I'm giving the catholic view (it's two different religions). And I understand the OP is catholic.

Just to clarify, I'm giving the biblical interpretation of baptism. I'm not Protestant.

Mrs OBumble

georgieporgy wrote: »

Don't worry OP, you are doing the right thing and your local priest won't be shocked or surprised to see you coming.

The OP also says "We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either".

They clearly have no intention of bringing the kids up as Catholic.

The should be treated in the same was as the African-evangelical pastor who turned up looking to get his kids baptised in a Catholic church. (I kid you not - it really happened, and the PP said "no".)

georgieporgy

keano_afc wrote: »

Just to clarify, I'm giving the biblical interpretation of baptism. I'm not Protestant.

It's just that the catholic interpretation is different. The interpretation you are giving is similar to that of many protestants. That is fine of course. But it's just the wrong interpretation for this young catholic family.

georgieporgy

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

The OP also says "We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either".

They clearly have no intention of bringing the kids up as Catholic.

The should be treated in the same was as the African-evangelical pastor who turned up looking to get his kids baptised in a Catholic church. (I kid you not - it really happened, and the PP said "no".)

Tha Church welcomes sinners as well as saints. In this case the OP claims to be catholic and wants to baptise his kids and presumably will grow into his faith a bit more as time goes on. Kinda like the good thief who left things a bit late.
Your african guy belonged to another religion.

a postere

Did anyone bother finding out from the OP why they've decided they now want their children spiritually born again from above, of water and of spirit, and if their children want to make their first communion or not before jumping to all sorts of conclusions and accusations about their family ?

katydid

a postere wrote: »

Did anyone bother finding out from the OP why they've decided they now want their children spiritually born again from above, of water and of spirit, and if their children want to make their first communion or not before jumping to all sorts of conclusions and accusations about their family ?

When he said "do godparents even have to be there", he made it quite clear there is no religious element to this desire for baptism at all. He has obviously no interest in or understanding of what baptism is.

katydid

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

The OP also says "We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either".

They clearly have no intention of bringing the kids up as Catholic.

Well, let's be honest here; he's just saying what is in fact the case for very many parents who have their kids baptised. They do it for the family, or for the school entry, or so the kids can make communion along with their pals.

katydid

georgieporgy wrote: »

What if the kids don't want to go to school or eat their broccoli?
I'm a dentist. I often have parents who drag screaming kids into my office (up all night with toothache) asking me to stick a needle in the kid's face and attack him with a pair of pliers. The kids usually say it's not their choice but heck, what do they know.

Keano, you're giving the protestant interpretation of baptism. I'm giving the catholic view (it's two different religions). And I understand the OP is catholic.

All Christian denominations take the same view of sacraments; that they are outward signs on an inward grace. Infants are baptised, and promises made on their behalf, which they later agree to themselves in confirmation. A child that is not an infant, who is capable of understanding (even limited) and speech, is capable of making a decision for themselves as to whether or not they want to be baptised.

Catholicism (I presume you mean ROMAN Catholicism) and Protestantism are not two different religions. They are two denominations of one religion, Christianity

a postere

katydid wrote: »

When he said "do godparents even have to be there", he made it quite clear there is no religious element to this desire for baptism at all. He has obviously no interest in or understanding of what baptism is.

Where did they make that clear ? And if their children want to make their first communion, I don't see why they should be stopped.

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these "

katydid

a postere wrote: »

Where did they make that clear ? And if their children want to make their first communion, I don't see why they should be stopped.

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these "

When he says "I don't even know who the parish priest is. Kinda dreading the whole thing. As low key as possible. Do even the Godparents need to be there?" there's not much indication of any kind of commitment to the church in any way, is there?

Yes, I agree that if their children want to be baptised and make their communion, they should. But the children should be the ones at the centre of this; the priest should talk to the kids and make sure they want to do it, and for the right reasons.

The kids are the innocents in this; what I find distasteful is the cynicism of the parent, who for whatever reason (wanting the kids to fit in, by the sound of it) wants to have them baptised, but doesn't want godparents or anything like that there. How is that parent going to stand there in front of his children - who are not babies, and understand what he says - and promise that he will do his best to bring them up in the Christian faith, when his attitude to the whole business is so dismissive?

eviltwin

a postere wrote: »

Where did they make that clear ? And if their children want to make their first communion, I don't see why they should be stopped.

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these "

Its not the worst thing a parent can do but if you are religious you see communion as an important event and I think it should be treated as such. I'm not religious but if I were I'd be pretty miffed at the idea of people using my faith as a day out or an excuse for a party. It must be hard knowing most of those kids won't see a church again until its time for their confirmation. Its different if you actually believe in it but even so my personal view is that it should be a choice a child makes, not their parents.

a postere

katydid wrote: »

When he says "I don't even know who the parish priest is. Kinda dreading the whole thing. As low key as possible. Do even the Godparents need to be there?" there's not much indication of any kind of commitment to the church in any way, is there?

Yes, I agree that if their children want to be baptised and make their communion, they should. But the children should be the ones at the centre of this; the priest should talk to the kids and make sure they want to do it, and for the right reasons.

The kids are the innocents in this; what I find distasteful is the cynicism of the parent, who for whatever reason (wanting the kids to fit in, by the sound of it) wants to have them baptised, but doesn't want godparents or anything like that there. How is that parent going to stand there in front of his children - who are not babies, and understand what he says - and promise that he will do his best to bring them up in the Christian faith, when his attitude to the whole business is so dismissive?

They've stated they attend mass, even if its only once or twice a year, its better than nothing. The graces received from God for even a few attendances and prayers can still work in ways unknown to us. If a child wants to make their first communion they should be facilitated with baptism. Yes it's 'imperfect' if their parents are lukewarm (who's perfect ?), but in spite of this, if God has found a way of letting these little ones come to him spirituality, by their own prayers and wishes, then these little children should not be hindered by other cynical adults who have hardened their own hearts.

eviltwin

a postere wrote: »

They've stated they attend mass, even if its only once or twice a year, its better than nothing. The graces received from God for even a few attendances and prayers can still work in ways unknown to us. If a child wants to make their first communion they should be facilitated with baptism. Yes it's 'imperfect' if their parents are lukewarm (who's perfect ?), but in spite of this, if God has found a way of letting these little ones come to him spirituality, by their own prayers and wishes, then these children should not be hindered by other cynical adults who have hardened their own hearts.

Explain to most kids what is involved in a FHC and they will want to make it. A day off school, free money and a princess dress? Yes please! But they should be told what they are under taking, what it actually means from a religious point of view. The important part is the sacrement. Everything else is just window dressing.

georgieporgy

katydid wrote: »

All Christian denominations take the same view of sacraments; that they are outward signs on an inward grace. Infants are baptised, and promises made on their behalf, which they later agree to themselves in confirmation. A child that is not an infant, who is capable of understanding (even limited) and speech, is capable of making a decision for themselves as to whether or not they want to be baptised.

Catholicism (I presume you mean ROMAN Catholicism) and Protestantism are not two different religions. They are two denominations of one religion, Christianity

I'm not sure I agree with you there Katy. (And I do mean roman catholicism) . Roman Catholicism is not a denomination. It's the Christian Church founded by Christ.
Now there are many different Protestant denominations of christians which don't accept what the rc church teaches, but the rc church is not one of them.

a postere

eviltwin wrote: »

Explain to most kids what is involved in a FHC and they will want to make it. A day off school, free money and a princess dress? Yes please! But they should be told what they are under taking, what it actually means from a religious point of view. The important part is the sacrement. Everything else is just window dressing.

I heard all those excuses as a child too, and I was well able to tell the difference between the adults that spun that and those who didn't. Children have more sense of different types of adults than people give them credit for. Children are not as into money and clothes as adults are. Even if no one in their family tells them why, they'll be told the real reason during the preparation for communion. Again if God has found some way of letting these little ones come to him spirituality, by their own wishes, even if its via some cynical adult who have hardened their own heart, so be it.

eviltwin

a postere wrote: »

I heard all those excuses as a child too, and I was well able to tell the difference between the adults that spun that and those who didn't. Children have more sense of different types of adults than people give them credit for. Even if no one in their family tells them why, they'll be told the real reason during the preparation for communion. Again if God has found some way of letting these little ones come to him spirituality, by their own wishes, even if its via the greed of some cynical adult who have hardened their own heart, so be it.

I think you're overestimating the deep thinking ability of an 8 yr old. Especially one who is not a day to day member of the church or coming from a religious family. I grew up in a very religious family but my FHC was just an excuse to wear a nice frock and be the centre of attention for the day. I still don't really understand why actually happened during it. We've had a few kids make FHC in our street and family and not one has ever mentioned the spiritual aspect of it, its always about the money and the outfit and what goodies they are going to buy. God isn't letting anyone come to him, the kids are being pushed into it. Surely its best for a person to find god in their own way, at their own time so they can have a personal relationship with their god rather than being pushed into it during what is little more than a cultural event now?

a postere

eviltwin wrote: »

I think you're overestimating the deep thinking ability of an 8 yr old. Especially one who is not a day to day member of the church or coming from a religious family. I grew up in a very religious family but my FHC was just an excuse to wear a nice frock and be the centre of attention for the day. I still don't really understand why actually happened during it. We've had a few kids make FHC in our street and family and not one has ever mentioned the spiritual aspect of it, its always about the money and the outfit and what goodies they are going to buy. God isn't letting anyone come to him, the kids are being pushed into it. Surely its best for a person to find god in their own way, at their own time so they can have a personal relationship with their god rather than being pushed into it during what is little more than a cultural event now?

Well its a pity you felt like that about it as a child and/or were taught that. I was simply told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for. I had some adults try to tell me it was about money/presents, but I just ignored them, and I remember feeling sorry inside for them. I still do.

eviltwin

a postere wrote: »

Well its a pity you felt like that about it as a child and/or were taught that. I was also told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for. I had some adults try to tell me it was about money/presents, but I just ignored them, and I remember feeling sorry inside for them. I still do.

No my point is I wasn't taught that, I went to school in the 80s so the emphasis at school and at home was on the religious aspect of FHC but at 7 years old all I was able to focus on was the dress and the money and the trip to the zoo. You'd grow up seeing your siblings and other kids make their FHC and you were excited to do it for yourself but for all the wrong reasons. You can't put an old mature head on a young child's shoulders.

Satori Rae

bt952000 wrote: »

Hi

We have never "got round" to getting our kids baptised and they are currently in an RC school, registered as RC.

Problem is Communion season is looming next year and , I guess, we have to get that sorted.

Probably in one hit to make it all easier.

Has anyone experience of getting non -infant children baptised and if there are other things to consider.

We wouldn't be regular church goers or anything like that either, every now again ,Easter , Christmas , that kind of thing.

I don't even know who the parish priest is.

Kinda dreading the whole thing. As low key as possible. Do even the Godparents need to be there?

Cheers

I plan to raise my children as non religious. And in thinking of how much Communion costs I thought it would be better to bring my kids on an epic day out instead, to do whatever they want. Which is something you could think about.

Saying that it is up to you if you want them to have their day in church. I think you might have to get started by talking to your local priest if you find out church hours or the number you could give them a call to help get the ball rolling.

a postere

eviltwin wrote: »

No my point is I wasn't taught that, I went to school in the 80s so the emphasis at school and at home was on the religious aspect of FHC but at 7 years old all I was able to focus on was the dress and the money and the trip to the zoo. You'd grow up seeing your siblings and other kids make their FHC and you were excited to do it for yourself but for all the wrong reasons. You can't put an old mature head on a young child's shoulders.

I never even seen a zoo until my 20's, and I had a lend of clothes for the day. Well, as I said, that's a pity you felt like that about it as a child, and I feel sorry for any child that was left with that idea or notion. I was simply told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for, it was nice and simple. Some parents and adults go way over the top and try to make it about everything else, but that's not the fault of the child.

eviltwin

a postere wrote: »

I never even seen a zoo until my 20's, and I had a lend of clothes for the day. Well, as I said, that's a pity you felt like that about it as a child, and I feel sorry for any child that was left with that idea or notion. I was simply told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for, it was nice and simple. Some parents and adults go way over the top, but that's not the fault of the child.

Well at the time I thought it was great. Why feel sorry for me? I had a day off school, I got to go out somewhere really exciting, I had all this money to buy what I wanted with, I was the centre of attention...it was brilliant Until I got older and wished I'd be allowed to make the choice myself as to what religion I was but that's for another day.

lazygal

a postere wrote: »

I never even seen a zoo until my 20's, and I had a lend of clothes for the day. Well, as I said, that's a pity you felt like that about it as a child, and I feel sorry for any child that was left with that idea or notion. I was simply told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for, it was nice and simple. Some parents and adults go way over the top and try to make it about everything else, but that's not the fault of the child.

I know someone who didn't want to make communion after it was all explained in the terms you mention, getting closer to god and all that. It made this person really upset, they couldn't sleep worrying about making their first confession and the closer they got to the big day the more they realised they didn't believe any of it. But family and school tradition won the day. The person had a similar battle when confirmation rolled around, and even made it clear to the priest and bishop on the day that they didn't believe in it, but again got the line about getting closer to god.

Why do children need to be brainwashed? Isn't there plenty of time for them to decide if they want to be indoctrinated when they are adults?

a postere

lazygal wrote: »

I know someone who didn't want to make communion after it was all explained in the terms you mention, getting closer to god and all that. It made this person really upset, they couldn't sleep worrying about making their first confession and the closer they got to the big day the more they realised they didn't believe any of it. But family and school tradition won the day. The person had a similar battle when confirmation rolled around, and even made it clear to the priest and bishop on the day that they didn't believe in it, but again got the line about getting closer to god.

Why do children need to be brainwashed? Isn't there plenty of time for them to decide if they want to be indoctrinated when they are adults?

I could equally say they shouldn't be brainwashed and indoctrinated against it either. I know children that have been. If someone didn't want to do it, they should not have had to, but if children do, they should not be prevented or hampered either, that's the point I was making, not any other. The reason little children are facilitated if they wish to, is from Christ's own commandment I gave earlier, and the fact entire households were baptised from the earliest days of the Church. You also cannot expect to force Christians not to follow this teaching. Anyways, I don't think this is the appropriate thread for a debate on Christianity and the sacrament baptism and confirmation, but if you want one, I'm sure there are threads available on the boards somewhere where you can be facilitated.

lazygal

If a child of seven wants to convert to scientology or Islam or Mormonism should he or she be allowed to make the decision to do so?

katydid

a postere wrote: »

They've stated they attend mass, even if its only once or twice a year, its better than nothing. The graces received from God for even a few attendances and prayers can still work in ways unknown to us. If a child wants to make their first communion they should be facilitated with baptism. Yes it's 'imperfect' if their parents are lukewarm (who's perfect ?), but in spite of this, if God has found a way of letting these little ones come to him spirituality, by their own prayers and wishes, then these little children should not be hindered by other cynical adults who have hardened their own hearts.

This isn't coming from the children. It's coming from the parents who, presumably for some social reason, want the kids to be able to make their communion. Funny how it hasn't been an issue up to now. I think the tone of the OP is distasteful, and insulting to people for whom membership of the Christian community is important - to paraphrase, what the OP said was "well, it's coming up to communion time, so we might as well get them baptised and have the communion and get it over with, but with as little religious commitment or involvement as humanly possible".

katydid

georgieporgy wrote: »

I'm not sure I agree with you there Katy. (And I do mean roman catholicism) . Roman Catholicism is not a denomination. It's the Christian Church founded by Christ.
Now there are many different Protestant denominations of christians which don't accept what the rc church teaches, but the rc church is not one of them.

No, Roman Catholicism is one denomination amongst many. It might think it's the original, but try telling that to their Orthodox brethern...

Whether Protestants or other Christians agree with the Roman Catholic church is neither here nor there. But one thing all Christians share in common is an understanding of what baptism is.

homer911

eviltwin wrote: »

Until I got older and wished I'd be allowed to make the choice myself as to what religion I was but that's for another day.

I hope you were still able to make a decision for yourself..

katydid

a postere wrote: »

I heard all those excuses as a child too, and I was well able to tell the difference between the adults that spun that and those who didn't. Children have more sense of different types of adults than people give them credit for. Children are not as into money and clothes as adults are. Even if no one in their family tells them why, they'll be told the real reason during the preparation for communion. Again if God has found some way of letting these little ones come to him spirituality, by their own wishes, even if its via some cynical adult who have hardened their own heart, so be it.

Children are not as into money or clothes as adults are? Do you KNOW many children?

katydid

eviltwin wrote: »

I think you're overestimating the deep thinking ability of an 8 yr old. Especially one who is not a day to day member of the church or coming from a religious family. I grew up in a very religious family but my FHC was just an excuse to wear a nice frock and be the centre of attention for the day. I still don't really understand why actually happened during it. We've had a few kids make FHC in our street and family and not one has ever mentioned the spiritual aspect of it, its always about the money and the outfit and what goodies they are going to buy. God isn't letting anyone come to him, the kids are being pushed into it. Surely its best for a person to find god in their own way, at their own time so they can have a personal relationship with their god rather than being pushed into it during what is little more than a cultural event now?

Seven or eight is far too early to expect children to understand what the Eucharist is about and how important it is to them. All they hear is dress, money, party, bouncy castle.

The kids aren't being pushed into anything - they are very willing participants, for the reasons stated above. But if there were no treats involved, I can't imagine too many would bother.

katydid

a postere wrote: »

Well its a pity you felt like that about it as a child and/or were taught that. I was simply told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for. I had some adults try to tell me it was about money/presents, but I just ignored them, and I remember feeling sorry inside for them. I still do.

I made First Communion at the age of seven. All I remember was the dress, practicing taking the wafer on my tongue without letting it touch the roof of my mouth (with ice-cream wafers from the shop round the corner from the school) and being taken to a restaurant for lunch - a rare event in the sixties. I honestly had no idea what else was going on, or if I did at the time, it left no lasting impression on me.

katydid

a postere wrote: »

I never even seen a zoo until my 20's, and I had a lend of clothes for the day. Well, as I said, that's a pity you felt like that about it as a child, and I feel sorry for any child that was left with that idea or notion. I was simply told communion was for getting closer to God and not about the money/presents, and that's what I wanted to do it for, it was nice and simple. Some parents and adults go way over the top and try to make it about everything else, but that's not the fault of the child.

I don't know what country you lived in, but it doesn't sound like Ireland any time in the last fifty years. The kids and the adults all make a big deal of it, and it would take a very strange child not to be caught up in the excitement.