Match Thread : England V Italy Twickenham Stadium Sat 14th Feb 2:30 Kick Off

Deleted User

Context

Deleted User wrote: »

I don't know a lot about English or Italian rugby bar what I see during the six nations, pro12 and European rugby. If no one else wants to do Eng v Ita I will do it, but let me be completely clear. The thread will start by suggesting a startling similarity between Italy and the Ewoks of Endor and the ENTIRE introduction will be about explaining how Italy could win this using mostly examples from Return of the Jedi.

Pudsy33 wrote: »

Please do this

.ak wrote: »

Okay, sold!

Deleted User wrote: »

This was meant in gest..

Intro

Galactic British Empire Rebellion
Mike Brown 15 Luke McLean
Anthony Watson 14 Leonardo Sarto
Jonathan Joseph 13 Luca Marisi
Luther Burrell 12 Andrea Masi
Jonny May 11 Giovanbattista Venditti
George Harrison Ford 10 Kelly Haimona
Ben Youngs 9 Edoardo Gori
Joe Marler 1 Alberto De Marchi
Dylan Hartley 2 Leonardo Ghiraldini
Dan Cole 3 Martin "Chewie" Castrogiovanni
Dave Atwood 4 George Biagi
George Kruis 5 Marco Bortolami
James Haskell 6 Francesco Minto
Chris Robshaw 7 Mauro Bergamasco
Billy Vunipola 8 Sergio Parisse

Tom Youngs 16 Andrea Manici
Mako Vunipola 17 Matias Aguero
Kieran Brookes 18 Dario Chistolini
Nick Easter 19 Josh Furno
Tom Croft 20 Samuela Vunisa
Richard Wigglesworth 21 Guglielmo Palazzani
Danny Cipriani 22 Tommaso Allan
Billy Twelvetrees 23 Giulio Bisegni


PREVIEW

The Galactic British Empire seeks to crush the Italian rebellion in one fell swoop this Saturday on the Forest Moon of Twickenham.

There are key battles the Italians must win to have any chance of Victory.




Firstly, Team Manager Colin Firth and Jacques Obrunelwan Kenobi will need to out manoeuvre Darth Lancaster and Emperor Johnson. During the pre match interviews, the Emperor will try to lure the Italians to the dark side of Twickenham during the coin toss so that the Imperials will not be playing into direct sun light.

Both sides will be nervous and I expect there to be some tension in the tunnel:



I imagine the English will look to Ambush the Italians early on:



After initially taking a beating I expect the Italians to make a few changes up front and begin to rally:



They will need to double up in the tackle to force turnovers:



Rain high balls on the English back three to build pressure and gain territory



They will need to stay close to the gain line as they will last longer there than they will against the death st...set-piece



The key to unlocking the English and breaking down their blast doors will be to beat them at their own power game and Martin "Chewie" Castrogiovanni is central to this:



Once things open up and the Italians push ahead on the score board, the English game plan and attitude should fall through the floor



If the Italians can follow the game plan set out in a galaxy far far away the return flight to Rome should be great craic altogether

The main lesson to learn from this is never make a joke in the 6N preview request thread.

.ak

total former

Holy sh*t. Best preview ever.

TheGoldenAges

Princess Leia's Bikini

This is amazing, all it needs is the result poll. England by 25+ anyway

LostArt

That Johnson/Lancaster pic is epic!

Fireball07

Wow. Easily the best preview ever done.

Come on the Ewoks!

Pudsy33

I am so happy right now. Bravo.

Bridge93

Twickenham is spelled wrong in the video... Do the whole thing again!

Very impressive stuff.

sydthebeat

Tears in my eyes here.... bravo sir !!!!

rrpc

Brilliant work!

The farce is strong in this one

English Lurker

Tbh, I've long advocated for England to use the Imperial March as the anthem. Cracking read sir.

Bridge93

Bridge93 wrote: »

Twickenham is spelled wrong in the video... Do the whole thing again!

Very impressive stuff.

Yeah the work laptop took exception to some of the video processing and no spell check, just rendered a better version there.

Misses just asked me was there a new star wars coming out :pac:

Yeah_Right

The Ewoks

I just got out of bed to give that a standing ovation.

You successfully combined 2 of my favourite things in life: rugby and Star Wars.

I actually want watch the game now.

ionadnapokot

If Cipriani was with the Rebel Alliance he would be the most convincing as Princess Leia. Although maybe he was with the Rebels....and has been turned to the Dark Side:eek:
Classic write up.
U r Ligind

vienne86

Princess Leia's Bikini

Wow Venjur......you're signed up for the season! Fabulous!

MattD

Disappointed at the lack of 'Use the force Luke McLean' but utterly fantastic otherwise!

enda1

Should the first lineout not have been on the 5 ,metre line since England brought the ball into the 22??

freyners

FORZA Italia

enda1

Wahoo!!!

Kiwi_knock

Very poor English defence, simple enough score for Parisse

Ghost Train

Interesting start

blade1

Too Easy!

Diabhal Beag

****ing love a marauding Sergio Parisse

JPCN1

Great stuff!

eyeball kid

Too easy of a try. Great for Italy.

Stheno

Not what I was expecting so far, fair dues to Italy

CountyHurler

Poor from Mike Brown again.. He's had a poor start to the Six Nations..

Celly Smunt

If parisse wasn't hampered by being Italian I have a feeling he'd be one of the greatest to ever play international rugby.

enda1

Well done England - that's how to defend a maul

westernfrenzy

Just turned it on now, was the Italy try good?

SlickRic

England use the scrum purely as an attempt to win penalties.

It's their prerogative, but it's turgid.

kevohmsford

If Italy had a decent Number 10 they would have a chance.

Zzippy

Princess Leia's Bikini

westernfrenzy wrote: »

Just turned it on now, was the Italy try good?

Good team try and good finish by Parisse

Celly Smunt

Christ that English back line I very soft on the defence

Taco Corp

The Ewoks

How many 6 nations games has Lacey done before?

Sangre

Love that they were comparing England to we 2003 team and then that.

SlickRic

kevohmsford wrote: »

If Italy had a decent Number 10 they would have a chance.

They do.

Celly Smunt

Mike brown down,we've got a mike brown down.

Diabhal Beag

This is some start from the Eyetalians

kevohmsford

SlickRic wrote: »

They do.

If they did they would be 7-0 ahead.

super_furry

Italy +29 is suddenly looking very generous.

Taco Corp

The Ewoks

Brown has to be gone from the game now. Will be a big loss for england

Davei141

Jesus that replay was sickening.

westernfrenzy

Zzippy wrote: »

Good team try and good finish by Parisse

Thanks. Probably will get to see it during the half time analysis.

edit: wait never mind.

that was a good try.

eyeball kid

An Italy victory would be devastating to my fantasy team this week but come on Italy!

Stheno

The refs accent is very funny to hear

kevohmsford

Early days but Italy have started very well.

Taco Corp

The Ewoks

Dan Cole and Billy V hanging out of Parisse well taken try.

Grandpa Hassan

Princess Leia's Bikini

This is a bit of a worry....it doesn't normally take this long

Kiwi_knock

Best wishes to Mike Brown, hopefully nothing too serious and all just precautionary.

bilston

These head injuries are a real sickener. Hope Brown is ok.

Great start by Italy. No chance they'll sustain it though.